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Schwip
Never sleeps.


Registered: 06/27/05
Posts: 3,937
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
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Fuck. New low. Fuck Me.
#5927940 - 08/03/06 07:29 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Well in the very near future, I will checking into some sort of rehab clinic.
Don't know if i will do out or in.
But I KNOW i need to go.
I have sunk to a very depressing, horrendous new low.
I have stolen from fucking family!
Words cannot describe how shitty i feel right now.
Fuck.
I am now officially the lowest of the low. Scum fucking sucker.
Fuck . Fuck. Fuck.
I'm at a total loss.
I'm so fucked right now. And the only thing that is clear to me, is to get REAL HELP.
I thought I could tame the beast. But the beast took over.
-------------------- -------------------------------- " If the sky were to suddenly open up there would be no law. There would be no rule. There would only be you and your memories... the choices you've made, and the people you've touched. If this world were to end there would only be you and him and no-one else. " .............. "MAN! You know there aint no such thing as left over crack!"
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Mike_yy


Registered: 10/28/05
Posts: 7,253
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5928091 - 08/03/06 09:30 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Schwip said:
I am now officially the lowest of the low. Scum fucking sucker.
If you was that bad man, you wouldn't be seeking help like you are and you wouldn't have a conscience like you do. Sounds like you've fucked up but your not all bad.
Find yourself the help you need, and be proud of the fact your trying to help/better yourself. Rehab might be the best thing you ever do !
If you've hurt people they will forgive you as long as you show some integrity/initiative and try to sort things out.
You'll be ok man. 
Goodluck 
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demiu5
humans, lol


Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 43,948
Loc: the popcorn stadium
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5928243 - 08/03/06 10:45 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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you stole something. okay.
Go to the person/people you stole from. If possible, give what it was back. Ask for their forgiveness and acceptance. There's nothing more you can do.
-------------------- channel your inner Larry David
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: demiu5]
#5928424 - 08/03/06 12:12 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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well man, if you feel that strongly about needing help, i would bet that you do. stay the long haul and do it right.
best of luck
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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SuperD
Cacti junky


Registered: 10/05/03
Posts: 6,648
Loc: The bridgesii bridge
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: ZippoZ]
#5928510 - 08/03/06 12:52 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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as previously posted, at least you feel bad about what you did and you felt it was wrong. also you're wanting to get help to prevent it from happening in the future. that's the best thing you can do right now imo..i'm not sure what substance you have problems with but steer clear. it's just not worth the high, especially when you have to betray your own family to achieve it. +5 for having a conscience and admitting to your mistake. we all are human afterall
--------------------
   D Manoa said: I need to stop spending all my money on plants and take up a cheaper hobby, like heroin. Looking for Rauhocereus riosaniensis seeds or live specimen(s), me if you have any for trade
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5928568 - 08/03/06 01:14 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Schwip
Never sleeps.


Registered: 06/27/05
Posts: 3,937
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5929009 - 08/03/06 04:04 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Thank you all for encouraging words. It means allot to me on this dark day.
The beast i speak of is crack cocaine.
It blows my mind, the control it has over me.
Just when I though I had everything under control. I go and fuck everything up.
Hopefully, in the grand scheme of things, this will be a turning point.
Anyone recommend any good Cleveland(or the general area) based outpatient programs that deal with cocaine?
-------------------- -------------------------------- " If the sky were to suddenly open up there would be no law. There would be no rule. There would only be you and your memories... the choices you've made, and the people you've touched. If this world were to end there would only be you and him and no-one else. " .............. "MAN! You know there aint no such thing as left over crack!"
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The_Hobbit
Bilbo Baggins


Registered: 04/06/04
Posts: 1,382
Loc: The Shire
Last seen: 16 years, 10 months
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5930378 - 08/04/06 01:55 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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First off, don't call yourself scum. You are a man with a problem who needs to focus on the solution.
This will be a turning point. No questions. You need to have self respect. You cannot have that without good intentions.
Good intentions require logical deduction. The only logical way to approach this is: cold turkey quit. Change your life and start taking steps in the direction that you want to go.
-------------------- Smoking my hobbit leaf... Please keep in mind that I am just a human being. Please read my posts carefully and interpret their meaning for yourself.
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Dreamer987
The VerbalHerman Munster


Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 5,326
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5930595 - 08/04/06 06:22 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Outpatient? Outpatient dosen't do shit. I don't suppose you have money for inpatient tho. Try your local chapter of N.A.
--------------------
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Schwip
Never sleeps.


Registered: 06/27/05
Posts: 3,937
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Dreamer987]
#5932164 - 08/04/06 05:10 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Well I talked with my mom a bit today.
She apparently works with a guy that went through the same things I am and he now works with a local NA group a city over.
So Im going to get involved with them.
For now Im going to focus on work.
-------------------- -------------------------------- " If the sky were to suddenly open up there would be no law. There would be no rule. There would only be you and your memories... the choices you've made, and the people you've touched. If this world were to end there would only be you and him and no-one else. " .............. "MAN! You know there aint no such thing as left over crack!"
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Fucknuckle
Dog Lover

Registered: 04/24/04
Posts: 6,762
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5933453 - 08/05/06 12:48 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Dude...get a fucking grip and take control of YOURSELF.
Fuck rehab Fuck any help FUck that shit
Be a MAN and get a fucking handle on your stupid habits
Go take care of what you stole what ever it takes.if teh person wont deal with you ...........fuck that too..still be humble about it but let it go
Now..........start saying positive things to your self DO...........what you knw u need to do Be...........happy with your progress LIVE.........the way that you already knw you want to live
Just be a grownup and stop reaching out reach within and grab your BALLS AND USE THEM
-------------------- What it is, is what it is my Brother. It is as it is, so suffer thru it.
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Ego Death
Justadropofwaterinanendlesssea


Registered: 04/27/03
Posts: 10,447
Loc: The War Machine
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Re: Fuck. New low. Fuck Me. [Re: Schwip]
#5933660 - 08/05/06 02:07 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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It wasn't the beast.
It was you.
Make a change for the better, now.
Or else turn yourself into the beast!
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