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OfflineAngeloWish
Sr. Mydriasis

Registered: 07/13/05
Posts: 595
Loc: MEXICO-Mushroom Capital
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
My GF on coke (long) need advice:(
    #5919631 - 07/31/06 07:27 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Yes she confessed today. She says she has been using it for months to overcome her depression supposedly triggered because of fights between us.

Yesterday we had one more fight and once again i told her i was so over this relationship because i find no more reasons to stay with her. I don't want to go deep into this but the truth is i do love this girl but instead of a romantic love i feel something more fraternal like if she was kind of my daughter or my sis, i feel she has so much to learn from life and from herself, specially to love herself in a way i cannot teach her how to even though I've tried. We have gone through plenty shit in this couple and a half years together, it has been a fucking hard trip that i want to end for the sake of both and because i believe she can be with someone better. I'm willing to stay friends if she is mature enough to handle it. but i doubt it.

So actually today she is my ex but something tells me the story will go on. The thing is she confessed this to me today she goes "you know what I've been doing this for the past months over and over with my friends (stupid scumbags that she hang out with all the time, not to mention they do drugs in the most irresponsible way), and i am sorry and i am such a mess and i am a piece of shit... " on so on low selfestime rubbish talk.

She stays with the idea that i am dumping her because i don't love her and don't want to live life with and stuff. And the truth is i don't really want because what I've already said and other stuff mainly about her family and her life condition. And yeah, that is another reason for her to be depressed, she just can't go over the idea that her father went away when she was like 13 (the guy is an asshole, calls every month or so). She lives with her mom, half brother and her grand mother... i don't want to sound harsh but believe me when i say her home is like a snake pit, her family has Syrian blood and the are very strange people, with a really confused way of living (IMO) i have never felt really comfortable around them, sometimes they are nice but i know them through Susan and she has really big emotions towards them charged with lots of anger and more shit.

I believe you get the big picture, really don't why i am posting guess looking for some advice... i am trying to leave her in a positive way trying to make her understand things are better this way but I've been in this situation a couple of times before and she threatened me with taking her life (which i highly doubt she'd do it but i was too afraid of this). I know this is cheap blackmailing and i am not stepping back this time, this is a no turning back for me situation but i don't really want to leave her on her own destiny i really know she's has a pretty shitty life and not much love around... oh, and also she has what i believe in English is called a cyst in one of her ovaries (prolly both) and has to get surgery this month. BTW she things this might be related to the 2 previous aborts she has had, saddly enough one was mine. please be sutile if u comment this, it is a very painful situation for me already.

Just for the record i am not running away, i want to be with her through all this medical issues and stay with her to support but i just want to make her clear i don't want her as a couple anymore...
I is really hard to explain, hell i did coke some time ago (and understood i didn't want it for me) and she knew it ... that is not the only thing that bothers me but a lot has been going on lately, the situation is a whole mess and between us it is just a viscous cycle in which we both are harming each other.

I have tripped and thought so much about this have talked to a few friends and they all say just leave her to her own but i guess i feel too attached and she makes things really painful when i try to walk out the door. Any comments would be appreciable... i feel like shit, i can't believe she didn't told me she was doing coke... i should had known, her depressing stages are getting worse... just want us to be OK :S

thanks for reading
peace


--------------------
+'this' reality is the one i like the most+


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InvisibleLeft Nut City
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Registered: 03/27/01
Posts: 2,360
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5919715 - 07/31/06 07:54 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

If the situation is unbearable then make a clean break and just move on. Don't booty-call her, don't be her venting board, just be done with it.

Really, it is the best way.


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InvisibleKerbouchardS
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Registered: 03/18/06
Posts: 9,823
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5919722 - 07/31/06 07:58 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

I read part of that, not all of that.
Sorry to hear bro. That is a tough situation
What else do you want me to say :confused:

But my personal opinion is if you really love her, try to help her even more.

If not, check out these chicks




--------------------
"War Doesn't Decide Who's Right... It Decides Who's Left."


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InvisibleBuddahKillah
U WANTFITE!?!?!?!?!?!

Registered: 10/15/04
Posts: 1,733
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: Kerbouchard]
    #5919742 - 07/31/06 08:05 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

She has been doing coke behind you back for MONTHS with her friends and you think she loves you??? pfft... quit lieing to youself like she is and move the fuck on. Do you know how many lies that is?


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InvisibleKerbouchardS
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Registered: 03/18/06
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5919781 - 07/31/06 08:14 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

If she has a nice wu tang, get with that pu tang.




This is not real advice
:thumbdown:


--------------------
"War Doesn't Decide Who's Right... It Decides Who's Left."


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InvisibleTHE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5919795 - 07/31/06 08:18 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

No offense but you ought to ask her how many dicks she's sucked for coke. :lol: In all seriousness though... I hope things work out for the best. :sun:


--------------------
m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.


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Offlineonicko721
I'm only human
Male

Registered: 02/21/06
Posts: 67
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 10 years, 6 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #5919846 - 07/31/06 08:36 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

My advice as to the best thing you could do would be to point her in the right direction of getting help from sources other than you. Be supportive of her at all times but she can't get the help that she need from you or your relationship with her. Keep your distance but I understand you can not abandon someone in need of help, especially someone you love.


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Offlineboatlaunch
Sex Educator
Female

Registered: 10/16/02
Posts: 1,143
Loc: Never You Effin Mind
Last seen: 13 years, 7 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #5919878 - 07/31/06 08:43 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

mattzdope said:
No offense but you ought to ask her how many dicks she's sucked for coke. :lol: In all seriousness though... I hope things work out for the best. :sun:





No shit.  After years of bartending I have to say, that a bitch on blow, will blow to get bitched.


--------------------
-----------------------------------
My Favorite Line:  "I mean, I've had a hand up inside me a time or two, but I'm not a puppet."  




SAVE A DRUM - BANG A DRUMMER!


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Offlinejoe666
The ReverendToke DBK
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5919890 - 07/31/06 08:46 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Sounds like one big suitcase full of drama.
I know you love this girl but, really you've just been with her so long it's
gotten comfortable. you need to get out of this and move on.
life could be so much better. the hardest thing to do id make the break and stick with it.


good luck.


--------------------
"A politician is like a baby's diaper, it should be changed often and for the same reason"-Coy Turner Sr.

"what is a weed, a plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered"--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"I'm sippin Hennessy, riding on my muthafucking enemies" -Meek Mill.



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InvisibleTHE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: boatlaunch]
    #5919913 - 07/31/06 08:52 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

boatlaunch said:
Quote:

mattzdope said:
No offense but you ought to ask her how many dicks she's sucked for coke. :lol: In all seriousness though... I hope things work out for the best. :sun:





No shit.  After years of bartending I have to say, that a bitch on blow, will blow to get bitched.




:rotfl: :yesnod:


--------------------
m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.


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OfflineAninator
Flashtique
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Registered: 01/03/06
Posts: 2,228
Loc: Philadlephia, PA
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5919914 - 07/31/06 08:52 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

I'm really sorry this is all happening. it sounds like it's really hard on you and i'm sorry you're going through it.

my honest opinion is that you clearly don't want to be in this relationship, you care for the girl, know she has a lot of messed up things going on right now, but bottom line you don't want to be in a relationship with her. You have to put yourself before others somtimes. Look she's gonna figure her shit out, it's best that you just let her do that. If she's been lying to you as well that brings the quesiton of trust. Do you still trust her? No trust=No relationship

i understand you care about her and want good things to come her way. but you aren't gonna do that for her, it's gonna come. worry about yourself right now.

I hope you feel better, we're always here to talk to you.


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OfflineAngeloWish
Sr. Mydriasis

Registered: 07/13/05
Posts: 595
Loc: MEXICO-Mushroom Capital
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: Aninator]
    #5920581 - 08/01/06 12:01 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Hey guys thanks for the cool ones...
paradesend, joe, niNator and the funny ones also.
Although she has a slutty past and she had cheated on me before i know for sure she didn't went that way for coke (yes really i know, she'd told me at today's hardcore conversation). Her friends are more like stupid rave kids, the ones that just like to act goofy all the time and laugh about stupidest things in life, she likes to hang with them because they treat her like a queen and laugh of all her jokes, she's pretty smart (in a way) and knows how to handle people, being around these idiots make her feel cool for a while, while snorting shit of course that she gets for free in return for entertaining'em.

So well. i guess i was right and u all confirmed it... i should be on myself, have many plans for my life and i discover new paths to enjoy it every day. I'm sad because she's sad, she can't see the light any more but i guess i am not helping by holding her hand... I'll just go through the surgery if it happens this week as she said it and then break the whole thing out.

Ah and well for trust i don't know... many many things have passed,  as i said before i don't want to go deep, it is pointless it has been a whole mistake since the very beginning but it helped me understand many many things about life and myself, i just would like her to learn same things. I can trust her when she acts like today, regretted and willing to change, to be a nice girl, but it has happened before many many times, she brings out that mask of hers, the one that i love, the one that shows an innocent, confused girl that needs love. fuck I'm so weak i know how evil she can be.

good night

Yes is is a lot of drama and i hate her crying to me asking me to love her and well living 5 blocks away from her is a little fucking hard to stay away i will arrange everything to move out as soon as she out from the surgery... maybe I'll return to my hometown at the end of the year... many possibilities pop into my head i just hope to choose the right one.

Thanks again for your support, i really wanted to be heard, i have talked endlessly to her about this and she doesn't get it, she's just a little girl that wants her daddy and i am not. :frown:


--------------------
+'this' reality is the one i like the most+


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OfflineAninator
Flashtique
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Posts: 2,228
Loc: Philadlephia, PA
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921261 - 08/01/06 08:45 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

How much older than her are you?


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OfflineAngeloWish
Sr. Mydriasis

Registered: 07/13/05
Posts: 595
Loc: MEXICO-Mushroom Capital
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: Aninator]
    #5921287 - 08/01/06 09:13 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

I'm 24 she's 21, she acts younger sometimes.


--------------------
+'this' reality is the one i like the most+


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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa

Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,235
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921292 - 08/01/06 09:19 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Why would someone combat depression by using coke?

THAT DOES NOTHING BUT CAUSE IT!!!!!!




"Users often report feelings of restlessness, irritability, and anxiety, and cocaine can trigger paranoia. Users also report being depressed when they are not using the drug and often resume use to alleviate further depression. In addition, cocaine users frequently find that they need more and more cocaine more often to generate the same level of stimulation. Therefore, any use can lead to addiction"


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OfflineAngeloWish
Sr. Mydriasis

Registered: 07/13/05
Posts: 595
Loc: MEXICO-Mushroom Capital
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921304 - 08/01/06 09:25 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

i guess she didn't care harming herself she just liked the lift it can give you... i know it is stupid, in a way i know she knows... this is just another cry for help thing, but there is nothing i can do but support her, i am convincing her to seek professional help, it aint easy tho :S thanks...


--------------------
+'this' reality is the one i like the most+


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InvisibleHendostan
I'm a teapot

Registered: 07/18/04
Posts: 4,444
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921320 - 08/01/06 09:31 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

definitely get her some professional help...she thinks her depression is triggered by fights with YOU?? and then she blows lines to feel better?? you are right in wanting to be out of this...i understand how hard that is, especially after being together so long. it's tough to get used to life without that other person around. but this girl obviously has some issues, and you aren't going to be able to fix her. she needs to figure out what her life needs, independent of you. i highly doubt you've caused her depression, that's just a convenient excuse. and it sounds like you've got a much more mature attitude about this...cheers for caring about someone and wanting the best for them, but i think you've taken her as far as you can, now it's up to her. she needs to think about herself, and you need to think about yourself. good luck man, these things are never easy... :peace: :heart:


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OfflineI2ancid
josh hartnett,movie star actor
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: Hendostan]
    #5921324 - 08/01/06 09:34 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

your girls been cheating on you, take my insight into the feminine reaction before it hits you hard through a welt of realizations into her true character and blows up while shes there... shes trying tolet you go but shes a fuckin pussy with no balls (woman) so she'll never tell you straight up.


--------------------
I went to st thomas and camped out ontop of the island... Despite my entire family being poor all my life, the land is priceless.
I was chased by haitians in the main city charlotte amalie when my girlfriend and I got some cocaine for free in a bar and mixed it with alcohol, to form a stronger drug. With such confidence at 2am, we walked the 4-5 or so miles down to the beach where the african slaves lie like lions waiting on tourist prey.


The war isen't on drugs... the war is on the causes that influence people to abuse drugs. drug-abuse is a by-product of the system and much like radioactive waste occurs from utilizing nuclear power, drug addicts with drug-problems will need to be properly disposed of, like the decaying radioactive waste produced from nuclear energy. -i2ancid


Edited by I2ancid (08/01/06 09:35 AM)


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OfflineI2ancid
josh hartnett,movie star actor
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: I2ancid]
    #5921328 - 08/01/06 09:38 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

she also sounds like a Gemini, is she?


--------------------
I went to st thomas and camped out ontop of the island... Despite my entire family being poor all my life, the land is priceless.
I was chased by haitians in the main city charlotte amalie when my girlfriend and I got some cocaine for free in a bar and mixed it with alcohol, to form a stronger drug. With such confidence at 2am, we walked the 4-5 or so miles down to the beach where the african slaves lie like lions waiting on tourist prey.


The war isen't on drugs... the war is on the causes that influence people to abuse drugs. drug-abuse is a by-product of the system and much like radioactive waste occurs from utilizing nuclear power, drug addicts with drug-problems will need to be properly disposed of, like the decaying radioactive waste produced from nuclear energy. -i2ancid


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OfflineAngeloWish
Sr. Mydriasis

Registered: 07/13/05
Posts: 595
Loc: MEXICO-Mushroom Capital
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921350 - 08/01/06 09:49 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Thanks again... taurus and a Red Planetarian Earth on the Mayan calendar... also she is obssesed with this, she thinks she has a great responsability with earth and ecological balance, sometimes she justifies her depression with the world suffering so much... i know it sounds like a fucking made up story but it is real and it is feels pretty much fucked up when i talk to her in an objective and reasonable way and she just doesn't get it, or get it in parts and all distorted.

Ok, im breathing, ok ill go through this... thank you all.


--------------------
+'this' reality is the one i like the most+


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OfflineI2ancid
josh hartnett,movie star actor
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Posts: 1,473
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Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921747 - 08/01/06 12:30 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

I once dated a strong taurus too. In my opinion their aloof promiscuity and general craziness can be worse than the gemini.


--------------------
I went to st thomas and camped out ontop of the island... Despite my entire family being poor all my life, the land is priceless.
I was chased by haitians in the main city charlotte amalie when my girlfriend and I got some cocaine for free in a bar and mixed it with alcohol, to form a stronger drug. With such confidence at 2am, we walked the 4-5 or so miles down to the beach where the african slaves lie like lions waiting on tourist prey.


The war isen't on drugs... the war is on the causes that influence people to abuse drugs. drug-abuse is a by-product of the system and much like radioactive waste occurs from utilizing nuclear power, drug addicts with drug-problems will need to be properly disposed of, like the decaying radioactive waste produced from nuclear energy. -i2ancid


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Offline888
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Registered: 11/22/05
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Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
Re: My GF on coke (long) need advice:( [Re: AngeloWish]
    #5921900 - 08/01/06 01:18 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

she needs to get a job and move out of her moms house

being away from her family and having some responsibility is what she needs

I know girls who drop out of highschool and don't do a damn thing and think that its ok and they know everything... but really they havent ever had any responibilities and solve their problems by screaming and crying until someones so sick of listening they do something or are just as miserable as they feel.

anyway ... love is hard... and people are complicated even when life is simple

use your heart


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