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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Forgive Me
#5868483 - 07/17/06 07:46 AM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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I have judged the planet so much that I have experienced glimpses of my own custom catered apocalypse.
I have been closed off so much from love that I have suffocated in cynicism.
I have been so afraid of opening that I have sabotaged myself perpetually for 5 or more years.
I have assumed that I know what the fuck I am talking about, and attempted to be an authority to others, overstepping my bounds.
I have hated and harbored hatred and fear towards other people and entities.
I have harmed my body more than it should have been harmed.
I have been out of synch with my body perhaps my entire life.
I have blamed others and evaded responsibility. but but but at times it seems that there is a valid finger to point. perhaps perhaps perhaps people tore a gaping wound in me.
But I did not fix it like I should have, and may have become addicted to the darkness.
Mostly, I've judged. Quite a lot of it right here, and elsewhere online. Sorry America, Earth, Police, Collective Self.
What have you done?
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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blackdragon999
Mason

Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 202
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5871426 - 07/17/06 10:37 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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I have given up
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs


Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 2 years, 10 months
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5872867 - 07/18/06 09:47 AM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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I have done the same things as you, and I've done them out of fear, ignorance and pride. When all this Earth needs from all of us is a little more confidence. As long as we judge we don't help and when we stop doing it and start think positive sollutions come. Thank you for your post.
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   All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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capliberty
Stranger


Registered: 04/23/06
Posts: 1,949
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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NO
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Booby
Agent Mulder

Registered: 09/14/05
Posts: 3,781
Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5874286 - 07/18/06 05:24 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Wouldn't it be great if you could create your own world where you didn't have to worry about all that stuff and just be you.
-------------------- Let it not be remembered That mycelium eats detritus and dies But that life in all it's glory Counts mycelium to be on it's side.
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Silversoul
Rhizome


Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5874316 - 07/18/06 05:33 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Lately, I've been feeling kind of guilty about my arrogance. As much as I try to hide it, deep down I really do believe that I'm smarter than most people, and I get annoyed with others' level of intelligence. I don't want to feel this way. I want to be compassionate and understanding towards others, but sometimes I just become so judgemental, though I tend to hide it pretty well. The one thing that humbles me is knowing the very fact that I am weak in resisting such arrogance, and I seek God's forgiveness for it.
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs


Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 2 years, 10 months
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: Booby]
#5874414 - 07/18/06 06:02 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Booby said: Wouldn't it be great if you could create your own world where you didn't have to worry about all that stuff and just be you.
No actually I think the best think to do is to get the balls to be ourselves right here, in these conditions.
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   All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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Booby
Agent Mulder

Registered: 09/14/05
Posts: 3,781
Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
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Quote:
MushroomTrip said:
Quote:
Booby said: Wouldn't it be great if you could create your own world where you didn't have to worry about all that stuff and just be you.
No actually I think the best think to do is to get the balls to be ourselves right here, in these conditions.
Tell that to the guys in jail.
-------------------- Let it not be remembered That mycelium eats detritus and dies But that life in all it's glory Counts mycelium to be on it's side.
Edited by Booby (07/18/06 06:14 PM)
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Panoramix
Getafix


Registered: 11/26/03
Posts: 634
Loc: Everywhere else
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5874545 - 07/18/06 06:35 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Of the ones you mentioned I'd say I've done the following;
I have harmed my body more than it should have been harmed. I have hated and harbored hatred and fear towards other people and entities. I have been out of synch with my body perhaps my entire life. I have become addicted to the darkness.
As for other stuff that I've done that haven't been brought up;
I've taken advantage of people, particularly my parents. I've lied and misled. I've denied myself simple pleasures for reasons I still haven't been able to discern. I've caused suffering and not felt the least bit bad about it (at the time). I've been lazy and apathetic, and caused no shortage of disappointment in others.
Certainly I've got my faults, but thankfully arrogance and judgementalility isn't one of them.
-------------------- Don't worry, I'm wrong.
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capliberty
Stranger


Registered: 04/23/06
Posts: 1,949
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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forgive me for saying this, but fuck rich people,
they're useful as a bunch of little fancied mutts that you want to foot punt, because they yap in your ear an act all special but serve no purpose but grief,
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Booby
Agent Mulder

Registered: 09/14/05
Posts: 3,781
Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
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I thought they was rich because they provided jobs.
-------------------- Let it not be remembered That mycelium eats detritus and dies But that life in all it's glory Counts mycelium to be on it's side.
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Disco Cat
iS A PoiNdexteR

Registered: 09/15/00
Posts: 2,601
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5876357 - 07/19/06 02:16 AM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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leery, whenever I read your posts you come across as being identical to myself. What have I done?
Quote:
I have judged the planet so much that I have experienced glimpses of my own custom catered apocalypse.
I have been closed off so much from love that I have suffocated in cynicism.
I have been so afraid of opening that I have sabotaged myself perpetually for 5 or more years.
I have assumed that I know what the fuck I am talking about, and attempted to be an authority to others, overstepping my bounds.
I have hated and harbored hatred and fear towards other people and entities.
I have harmed my body more than it should have been harmed.
I have been out of synch with my body perhaps my entire life.
I have blamed others and evaded responsibility. but but but at times it seems that there is a valid finger to point. perhaps perhaps perhaps people tore a gaping wound in me.
But I did not fix it like I should have, and may have become addicted to the darkness.
Mostly, I've judged. Quite a lot of it right here, and elsewhere online. Sorry America, Earth, Police, Collective Self.
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Cracka_X
Spiritual Dirt Worshipper



Registered: 01/25/03
Posts: 8,808
Loc: Swamp
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Re: Forgive Me [Re: leery11]
#5883911 - 07/21/06 09:03 AM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
leery11 said: I have judged the planet so much that I have experienced glimpses of my own custom catered apocalypse.
I have been closed off so much from love that I have suffocated in cynicism.
I have been so afraid of opening that I have sabotaged myself perpetually for 5 or more years.
I have assumed that I know what the fuck I am talking about, and attempted to be an authority to others, overstepping my bounds.
I have hated and harbored hatred and fear towards other people and entities.
I have harmed my body more than it should have been harmed.
I have been out of synch with my body perhaps my entire life.
I have blamed others and evaded responsibility. but but but at times it seems that there is a valid finger to point. perhaps perhaps perhaps people tore a gaping wound in me.
But I did not fix it like I should have, and may have become addicted to the darkness.
Mostly, I've judged. Quite a lot of it right here, and elsewhere online. Sorry America, Earth, Police, Collective Self.
What have you done?
I was the same way and every now n then I'll get carried away on a touchy subject but all in all you're not the first and won't be the last to feel something like this. Be thankful you realized it now, at least that's how I felt and was relieved. Maybe some basic structure would help. Express yourself like you do here and you may find someone who feels the same way but has yet to realize it. yin and yang... the outer and inner... cold and warmth... Talk to random people.
Quote:
I have been out of synch with my body perhaps my entire life.
Not many people are in synch with their bodies. When I'm feeling lost, down, or confused I go into the woods. A nature walk or whatever trail may be around will suffice of course but get away from civilization and the "concrete jungle".
-------------------- The best way to live is to be like water For water benefits all things and goes against none of them It provides for all people and even cleanses those places a man is loath to go In this way it is just like Tao ~Daodejing
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