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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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When Friendship Dies
#5852486 - 07/12/06 09:12 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Should we give it a decent burial or let it fester in the hope we can learn something from the decaying remains in spite of the stench?
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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JCoke
dream observer


Registered: 02/17/04
Posts: 1,229
Loc: maryland
Last seen: 9 years, 22 days
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beautiful worded, I must say.
-------------------- hello, your name is life on earth ------------------------------------
"I traveled a long way seeking God, but when I finally gave up and turned back, there He was, within me! O Lalli! Now why do you wander like a beggar? Make some effort, and He will grant you a vision of Himself in the form of bliss in your heart." -the saint of the Kashmir Shaivism tradition: Lalli.
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signoffate
Only Human
Registered: 02/22/05
Posts: 161
Loc: Where is here?
Last seen: 16 years, 11 months
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Best solution is to never give it life! Plus I think that smell is your ego
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: When Friendship Dies [Re: signoffate]
#5853908 - 07/13/06 07:41 AM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Best solution is to never give it life! Plus I think that smell is your ego
Are you saying it is better to keep to yourself rather than pretend that people you are acquainted with are really "friends" when in reality they are just acquaintences? The ego is what may need the "friend" in the first place, to be special and better than those "loners" who have no friends. The ego certainly is what leads to the death of a friendship, and hangs on to the hope that something can be salvaged from something that never really was.
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb


Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,532
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best to love and lose than not to love. one needs to salvage oneself and sometimes that means time to bail, then the festering remains have to be enshrined or at least temporarily avoided.
anyway avoiding pain of this type is not the best rule of thumb.
however, if you accidentally love a tormentor. run away and save your people too. this would be a mistake to learn from, i.e. "see tormentor -> turn away."
otherwise we are all nuts sometimes the crazy bits match well. that is when it is great.
there are a few really great people that are not really quite that great that I really really like, but I can't stand to be near them, to hear them on the phone, or to get emails from, since they expect too much from me.
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DoctorJ


Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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I fight for a dying friendship as hard as I can, but once its dead, I'm like 'fuck it' and I move on.
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signoffate
Only Human
Registered: 02/22/05
Posts: 161
Loc: Where is here?
Last seen: 16 years, 11 months
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You don't need to keep isolated, but you also don't need to pretend anything either. If you know and affiliate with someone at what point do they become your friend? At what point are you theirs? Or do you first need to consider them an asset before seeking friendship?
From my 'loner' stance, it doesn't matter if someone is a stranger, acquaintance, or long time relation, I just try and be a friend. I remeber that all things are impermanent, whats here today may be gone tommorow.
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BlueCoyote
Beyond


Registered: 05/07/04
Posts: 6,697
Loc: Between
Last seen: 3 years, 16 days
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In my opinion, it is best to know, when to break a friendship and put it back on a neutral status. If both see worth in that friendship again, it will happen again, so never exclude this possibility. You know why you were friends. The knowledge of the other person is of immense value and it is in 'your' hands what to make about it, relating to 'your' knowledge of yourself.
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