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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: Gillette]
#5821550 - 07/04/06 09:46 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Gillette said: For a minute I avoided posting this because I think it may make me sound like a snob, or a bit of a picky bitch
There's nothing wrong with being picky about possible mates. After all, this is somebody that you could spend many years with. You need to be picky about it.
Quote:
Gillette said: I've really been avoiding the dating thing, but I get coaxed into it more and more, and its gay, its sucks
I've been going on alot of coffee dates. They suck. I feel like its an interview and I'm usually the person doing the interviewing and realizing I have no interest in what the other person is even saying....
That shit does suck. It is so awkward. The underlying theme is, "I am checking you out to see if you are relationship material"...and both people know it. It makes it so weird. Not only are you evaluating the other person but you know that they are doing the same to you. It is utterly uncomfortable. It is hard to find someone that you just "gel" with and that you don't have to put forth effort to converse with or be interested in.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: CherryBom]
#5821554 - 07/04/06 09:47 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
CherryBom said: Men are stupid.
You want to be lied to? Get a boyfriend.
Not all of us guys are assholes.
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KingOftheThing
the cool fool


Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 27,397
Loc: USA
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Quote:
The_Red_Crayon said: Join the million+ club of all the people who are sick and tired of dating and the social scene. You can blame it all on a particular sex but id rather just blame it on the soulless materialism and status rat race. Perhaps maybe if you get out of that scene you will find someone you truly love.
im not sure if there is one person you are supposed to truly love. i dont think monogamy is humanity's true nature. i do think people resort to monogamy by necessity or because of the culture... maybe im wrong but look at rich people, famous people...anyone who has the means to still land hot tail at any age never stay faithful.
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hevvy_psi
groover

Registered: 01/29/04 
Posts: 10,446
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: CherryBom]
#5821555 - 07/04/06 09:48 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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is sexual intent negative?
i find it difficult to exclude this from my thoughts with most women, though i love the ineraction obtained from any new person.
its amazing how an interaction can take almost tangible steps toward a closer connection. you can feel security and appreciation for both what you display and what you hold just beneath the surface.
-------------------- egocentrism is bangin on the door self-destructive selflessness seeps out from the core alone - eyes closed - an empty room i'm curled on the floor choose nothing, thus deciding all the nothing i've in store.
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KingOftheThing
the cool fool


Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 27,397
Loc: USA
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5821561 - 07/04/06 09:50 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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you're better off being an asshole...trust me i stopped being nice years ago, chicks chew up and spit out nice guys
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hevvy_psi
groover

Registered: 01/29/04 
Posts: 10,446
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even you must have some romanticized idea of a deeper conection that catering to oppressed females' submissive side.
-------------------- egocentrism is bangin on the door self-destructive selflessness seeps out from the core alone - eyes closed - an empty room i'm curled on the floor choose nothing, thus deciding all the nothing i've in store.
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Iamthewalrus
every evening Idied and everynight I wasreborn


Registered: 03/24/04
Posts: 3,744
Loc: Ontario
Last seen: 15 years, 3 months
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: CherryBom]
#5821570 - 07/04/06 09:52 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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I find this a lil bit offensive but not so much because I think your right about most men...but there are good guys out there...I wouldn't say I'm some great catch or anything(really I wouldn't) but I am all about honesty...and even in relationships I always try to be as honest as possible...I have never cheated on anyone and never would...I'm more emotional to be honest then most girls are...and I LOVE talking about my feelings...especially with ppl I love...I haven't had a lot of relationships because I do not feel comfortable with the whole dating scene in general...I prefer to meet someone doing something I also love...lol I'm such a girl...I Love cuddlin, I'm very honest and I have a whole lotta love inside me that I want to spoil some girl with...but I haven't met the right one yet...anyways don't group all us guys together cause we are not all assholes just out to get laid and use women like they are nothing but toys...I think guys that do that are unevolved and in denial of their feelings the same as u do I'm sure...and hey maybe its just built into our genes...I AM heavy on the female hormones theres no doubt about it...so maybe this is why I seem to be so much different then most guys...or maybe its just cause I've taken the time to get in touch with myself and am not afraid of my feelings...I dunno...anyways I'm rambling
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CherryBom
Yoga Gypsy


Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5821572 - 07/04/06 09:52 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said:
Quote:
CherryBom said: Men are stupid.
You want to be lied to? Get a boyfriend.
Not all of us guys are assholes.
I know that. I was just being angry. Sorry.
--------------------
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hevvy_psi
groover

Registered: 01/29/04 
Posts: 10,446
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: Iamthewalrus]
#5821573 - 07/04/06 09:54 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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i love to talk about feelings with new people, but tend to feel like my feelings are old hat once people get a good impression of them, i.e. 'know' me well.
-------------------- egocentrism is bangin on the door self-destructive selflessness seeps out from the core alone - eyes closed - an empty room i'm curled on the floor choose nothing, thus deciding all the nothing i've in store.
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eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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Quote:
KingOftheThing said: you're better off being an asshole...trust me i stopped being nice years ago, chicks chew up and spit out nice guys
Yep, every time a girl categorizes me as "nice" she treats me like dirt. The girls Im an asshole to quickly get a crush on me...
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
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KingOftheThing
the cool fool


Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 27,397
Loc: USA
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: Iamthewalrus]
#5821580 - 07/04/06 09:55 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Iamthewalrus said: I think your right about most men...
i love how guys always try throwing all other men under the bus. "yeah they're all assholes, but im different" are ya? i think women know that if you date a guy long enough it becomes evident just how much he is like all other men.
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hevvy_psi
groover

Registered: 01/29/04 
Posts: 10,446
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: hevvy_psi]
#5821581 - 07/04/06 09:56 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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i.e. there's something more exciting, and potentially honest, AND potentially random, and THUS potentially likeable through its vulnerability, honesty, candor, and confidence, about spilling guts to strangers.
though i hold true to the statement that sexuality never strays far from the thoughts in that its preferable to do the spilling to a stranger who appeals to me aesthetically.
-------------------- egocentrism is bangin on the door self-destructive selflessness seeps out from the core alone - eyes closed - an empty room i'm curled on the floor choose nothing, thus deciding all the nothing i've in store.
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MOTH
Wild Woman


Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Quote:
KingOftheThing said:
Quote:
The_Red_Crayon said: Join the million+ club of all the people who are sick and tired of dating and the social scene. You can blame it all on a particular sex but id rather just blame it on the soulless materialism and status rat race. Perhaps maybe if you get out of that scene you will find someone you truly love.
im not sure if there is one person you are supposed to truly love. i dont think monogamy is humanity's true nature. i do think people resort to monogamy by necessity or because of the culture... maybe im wrong but look at rich people, famous people...anyone who has the means to still land hot tail at any age never stay faithful.
I don't believe that monogamy is humanity's true nature either, and I am married. I had a discussion with my husband just a few minutes ago about "free love" and how I was saying that I sometimes want to express my love physically to certain friends of mine and how that's been making me feel very confused about marriage...
I'm glad we talked, cause turns out we're on the exact same page. He says that marriage makes it "safe" for us to express love with other people. I never want to have sex with other people...but kissing, cuddling, touching...I need to be able to do that with EVERYONE!
Luckily he understands and was shocked I thought he'd be mad about it.
Free is the way to be...
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THE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: CherryBom]
#5821586 - 07/04/06 09:57 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
CherryBom said: And for bloody hell, don't you fucking dare lie to somebody who loves you with thier entire soul. They don't deserve that, and you don't deserve that.
If you love, then LOVE. If you don't know, then figure it out, cuz you're missing out.
In your opinion are lies always destructive to a relationship?
Sometimes it's hard to tell the truth (even when you have a clear conscience and no reason at all to lie) when you know the truth will hurt the person you love.
One example is it's very hard to tell a jealous individual the truth because they will get it in their head that you're lieing even if you're being completely truthful. (i.e. hanging out with an ex who's now strictly a friend, yet your significant other doesn't really believe you can be friends with this person without a sexual relationship) A lie keeps a balance.
-------------------- m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Quote:
KingOftheThing said: you're better off being an asshole...trust me i stopped being nice years ago, chicks chew up and spit out nice guys
Dude...I know all about "The Game". I know what it's like to have to inject mystery, aloofness, drama, and asshole-like behavior into the relationship....because if you don't the girl just seems to get bored and antsy.
I don't feel like "playing the game" anymore. I just want to be myself.
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hevvy_psi
groover

Registered: 01/29/04 
Posts: 10,446
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ah, wish i could hang around. i like the perspectives. night night
-------------------- egocentrism is bangin on the door self-destructive selflessness seeps out from the core alone - eyes closed - an empty room i'm curled on the floor choose nothing, thus deciding all the nothing i've in store.
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CherryBom
Yoga Gypsy


Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5821589 - 07/04/06 10:00 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said: I don't feel like "playing the game" anymore. I just want to be myself.
That's how you win the game. When you stop caring about it.
--------------------
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: Iamthewalrus]
#5821594 - 07/04/06 10:02 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Iamthewalrus said: I'm more emotional to be honest then most girls are...
I LOVE talking about my feelings...
I Love cuddlin, I'm very honest and I have a whole lotta love inside me that I want to spoil some girl with...
I AM heavy on the female hormones theres no doubt about it...s
I've taken the time to get in touch with myself and am not afraid of my feelings...
And I'll bet you haven't gotten laid in 5 years.
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eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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Quote:
Iamthewalrus said: I think your right about most men...
As I think the same about most women....
And on the thing of human nature, I think monogamy is part of human nature as with many other animals. Im too lazy to look this up to give you exact species, but many animals do practice monogamy, and humans are one of them.
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
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MOTH
Wild Woman


Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Warning: dating rant inside [Re: eligal]
#5821600 - 07/04/06 10:05 PM (17 years, 6 months ago) |
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The social expectations on "marriage" is what drives it into the ground in my opinion. Two people mating for life...beautiful! But I think it's incredibly important to be able to express love and affection to anyone you feel like...if sex is involved or not.
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