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OfflineTriplexiosis
Lachrymologist
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Registered: 12/17/04
Posts: 199
Loc: Europe
Last seen: 15 years, 4 months
Grudges
    #5748778 - 06/14/06 06:32 AM (17 years, 7 months ago)

To me holding a grudge against someone is an indication I'm incapable of forgiving myself, thus incapable of accepting and loving myself, therefor incapable of loving others.
As Jesus said (whether he was fictional or real, I don't care nor have proof of either) „If you love only those who love you, what reward can you expect?“
Wearing a grudge consumes a soul, I can only speak from my experience, and it makes me feel like worthless, makes me feed my fears, ignorant to the damage done makes me sink deeper into negativity.
So people make mistakes, it's only human, and they hurt you, hurting themselves in the process even if they're unaware of it. Turn the other cheek and you'll most likely end up in more pain, unless you come to an understanding of what was done to those people (who hurt you...)
You can choose not to see what has been done to them, and hold tightly to every wrong doing, not letting go. This might consume you to an extent of pulling the trigger.
Or you may choose not to see only negative, but what brought the negative in the first place as well.
Everybody is someone else's nigger, we're all just wounded animals licking our wounds, not allowing just anyone to come close and remove all these poisoned arrows stuck in our hearts. Yet most of the time incapable of removing them ourselves.
To me turning the other cheek is the way to go, though it's a hard and bumpy road. Don't be afraid of pain, cuz pain can help you grow if you allow it.
„Tool's“ idea of Lachrymology might be complete bullshit, but it's something that proved to be very rewarding for me so far.
I won't say I'm not an egoistic little prick, cuz I am (and I have a problem with people pointing that out to me) However my shadow is a part of me, neglecting it, stuffing it deep down inside won't solve anything. Transmuting it (or attempting to) is „facing the problem“!

„Give away the stone, let the waters kiss and transmute these leaden grudges into gold.“

Tool - Grudge


Peace  :heart:


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"If there were no desire to heal, the damaged and broken met along this tedious path I've choosen here, I certainly would have walked away by now" Tool - Patient

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." Antoine de Saint-Exupery


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
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Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
Re: Grudges [Re: Triplexiosis]
    #5748995 - 06/14/06 09:21 AM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Nice post, and true enough. :thumbup:


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"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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InvisibleLunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story
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Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
Re: Grudges [Re: Triplexiosis]
    #5749029 - 06/14/06 09:35 AM (17 years, 7 months ago)

grudge (grj)
tr.v. grudged, grudg·ing, grudg·es
1. To be reluctant to give or admit: even grudged the tuition money.
2. To resent for having; begrudge: grudged him his good ways with the children.
n.
A deep-seated feeling of resentment or rancor: bears a grudge about the accident.

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[Middle English gruggen, grucchen, to grumble, complain, from Old French grouchier.]

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It appears the word grudge means many things. A "grudge match" in boxing brings in more fans. Everybody loves bad blood. And dirty laundry. As long as it's someone elses blood being spilled and someone else's problems. Soap operas with long standing grudges are adored by millions.

Why Judge the Grudge?


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Anxiety is what you make it.


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Offlinebobjones
...
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Registered: 10/12/05
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Loc: Tx
Last seen: 8 years, 3 months
Re: Grudges [Re: Triplexiosis]
    #5749352 - 06/14/06 11:33 AM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

If you love only those who love you, what reward can you expect?“




great quote  :thumbup:


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"Outside of a dog a book is a man's friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read"
-Groucho Marx


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OfflineDoctorJ
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Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Re: Grudges [Re: Triplexiosis]
    #5749660 - 06/14/06 01:17 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

grudges are created by those who act against an innocent person. When the innocent are acted against unjustly, it causes them to think: "Those bastards! Motherfuckers! They'll never get away with this."

Has someone acted against you unjustly? Don't feel guilty for having a grudge against them! Of course, your ultimate goal should be to heal the grudge and let it go, but remember it came about for a reason.

There is a fine line between turning the other cheek and being a total doormat. I was so addicted to turning the other cheek that I allowed myself to be a doormat for quite some time. I thought that my emotions, instincts, and thoughts were wrong and something that needed to be conquered. And I was not entirely wrong in this belief. But then I realized that there is another side to the coin.

Those thoughts feelings and instincts are a reaction to the way I have been treated. If someone pushes me in the mud, kicks me while I'm down, and spits in my face, for no good reason, I have every goddamned right to be pissed, and thirst for Justice. These feelings are healthy and natural as long as they aren't taken too far, and I have never taken them too far. If anything, I haven't taken them far enough, and that's why I frequently find myself unrewarded for my sacrifices.

Of course, My sacrifices do not require a reward for myself. But it is nice to be appreciated, and it is not nice to be disrespected. Its hard to be in a sunny mood when people walk all over you.

As I recently told another poster, I have learned to forgive, but not to forget. Forgetting the crimes of the unjust isn't fair to their victims. If there is forgiveness for the perpetrator, there must also be Justice for the victims of his crimes.

Thus, Justice is both an angel of mercy and reward, and punishment most severe. The cards Justice deals its patrons depend entirely upon the Karma of the individual who stands before Justice.


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InvisibleLunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story
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Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
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Re: Grudges [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5750311 - 06/14/06 05:21 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

I rather like the line from the movie Primal Fear:

On my first day of law school my professor says two things....First, from this day forward when your Mother says "I love You" get a second opinion...Second, if you want justice, go to a Whore House, If you want to get Fucked, go to Court.


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Anxiety is what you make it.


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OfflineTriplexiosis
Lachrymologist
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Registered: 12/17/04
Posts: 199
Loc: Europe
Last seen: 15 years, 4 months
Re: Grudges [Re: LunarEclipse]
    #5750479 - 06/14/06 06:21 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Why Judge the Grudge?



It seems to me that by judging the grudge one can only expand it, or morph it into a grudge against self. It's acceptance of the grudge that counts IMHO...

Quote:

Those thoughts feelings and instincts are a reaction to the way I have been treated. If someone pushes me in the mud, kicks me while I'm down, and spits in my face, for no good reason, I have every goddamned right to be pissed, and thirst for Justice.



There's a difference between self defense and thirst for justice. In Aikido for example the former is encouraged while the later discouraged.
I know I'm in no position to play judge nad jury, this doesn't mean I'll play doormats either :wink: (nice post btw)


--------------------


"If there were no desire to heal, the damaged and broken met along this tedious path I've choosen here, I certainly would have walked away by now" Tool - Patient

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." Antoine de Saint-Exupery


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OfflineBasilides
Servent ofWisdom
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Registered: 02/10/06
Posts: 7,059
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Re: Grudges [Re: Triplexiosis]
    #5750486 - 06/14/06 06:22 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Grudges are always bad news. It's best to let sleeping dogs lay


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"Have you found the beginning, then, that you are looking for the end? You see, the end will be where the beginning is. Congratulations to the one who stands at the beginning: that one will know the end and will not taste death."


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OfflineDoctorJ
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Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Re: Grudges [Re: Basilides]
    #5750987 - 06/14/06 08:12 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Basilides said:
Grudges are always bad news. It's best to let sleeping dogs lay




tell that to my Sicillian friends Guido and Nunzio.  I casually mention to them a disagreement I have with somebody and the next day I read in the paper that his house was burned down mysteriously :shrug:

must've had a bad day, I dunno :lol:


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OfflineBasilides
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Re: Grudges [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5750998 - 06/14/06 08:15 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Write a poem about it


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"Have you found the beginning, then, that you are looking for the end? You see, the end will be where the beginning is. Congratulations to the one who stands at the beginning: that one will know the end and will not taste death."


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OfflineDoctorJ
Male

Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
Re: Grudges [Re: Basilides]
    #5751012 - 06/14/06 08:19 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

My friend Guido
thinks he knows
but he don't know
some nigga jacked me for my elbows
then Guido beat him him down with a crossbow...
Oh No!
Why the hate Guido?
No need to bust out your gun
plenty more elbows where those came from

:smile: :smile: :smile:

A little spot poetry on the spot

there is no 'freestyle'

style is not free, style is expensive :lol:


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OfflineBasilides
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Registered: 02/10/06
Posts: 7,059
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Last seen: 12 years, 8 months
Re: Grudges [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5751145 - 06/14/06 08:50 PM (17 years, 7 months ago)

Green Eggs and Ham


--------------------


"Have you found the beginning, then, that you are looking for the end? You see, the end will be where the beginning is. Congratulations to the one who stands at the beginning: that one will know the end and will not taste death."


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