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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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God, I fucking suck
#5732597 - 06/09/06 11:10 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I'm all buzzed up on booze (which seems to be the norm nowadays).
I am going to complain and vent. There is no need to respond to me if you don't wish to. I am not seeking advice. Maybe my emotional flailings and self-flagellations can offer something to my fellow dorks. You are not alone.
I went out to a bar tonight. My friend was DJ'ing. He had invited a bunch of his friends. There was a girl there. I had met her before at this friend's house about eight months ago. The second I saw her I became infatuated. She just oozes hotness, sex, coolness, and mystery. The first time I met her our eyes locked and I about fell into her. Her eyes were that magnetic. She gave me a look that made my head swoon. If there was a word to describe her, "yummy" would suffice. I am really damn picky when it comes to women too. I can go a year without coming into contact with a woman that really catches my eye. So, when a woman does catch my eye it really hits me and I take notice.
So, she was out at this bar tonight. She looked incredible (of course). I had a few beers and I was sitting near the pool tables. She came over and said, "Hey". She started talking. She said, "Have I met you before?" and "Where are you from?". I attempted to act all cool. I said, "Oh...I think I remember you. What's your name again?" (I knew damn well what her name was). She smiled and obviously wanted to speak to me. I can't tell if she was flirting or if she was just being nice. I managed to carry on a half-assed conversation. I was not spectacular but I didn't fall flat on my face....at first anyway.
As the conversation went on I became more and more like a deer in headlights. I either stared at the floor, pretended to stare off in the distance at something, or said completely STUPID shit. I couldn't believe some of the unfunny, pointless, and assanine stuff that was coming out of my mouth. The conversation slowly died and we ended up looking at stuff in different directions.
Jesus fucking God, how shitty it is when stuff like that happens. Both people sit there and are completely aware that the conversation has died. They then wonder what to do next. Does one get up and look for some diversion? Does one attempt to rekindle the conversation? Does one attempt to look aloof? If there was a word to describe the whole affair....AWKWARD.
Yes, I usually freeze when I come into contact with attractive women. I either don't say anything or I make an ass of myself. Every once in a while I am able to make a good impression with an attractive woman, but it is rare. I'd say my conversation success rate with attractive women is about 10%. If she was a guy or if I found her unnattractive then I would have been able to sit and talk with her no problem (if I had put forth effort).
This girl is so damn sexy. Christ. Why did God make me such a fucking dork? Motherfucker.
Edited by RandalFlagg (06/15/06 05:32 PM)
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Le_Canard
The Duk Abides

Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 94,392
Loc: Earthfarm 1
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5732678 - 06/09/06 11:43 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Don't be so hard on yourself. Everyone gets a little nervous around a hot woman. You just have to work through it with practice.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Le_Canard]
#5732691 - 06/09/06 11:48 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I'm almost 27. If I haven't figured it out yet I ain't gonna figure it out.
Because I can't talk to the girls that I like I always end up going out with the ones that I don't really like. I'm fucked.
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Le_Canard
The Duk Abides

Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 94,392
Loc: Earthfarm 1
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5732697 - 06/09/06 11:49 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Naw, that's still pretty young. You'll get some confidence soon.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Le_Canard]
#5732709 - 06/09/06 11:53 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Sometimes I can pull it off. Most of the time I can't. It's like I have no control over my charisma. Sometimes it appears and sometimes it doesn't.
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5732849 - 06/10/06 12:45 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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man i hear ya on both counts, being all boozed up and not being able to talk to the girls..
i met this girl about a week ago at a party, and somehow we ended up climbing a tree togeather and making out for a while, in that tree... it was allright.
2 days later i called her back but she missed the call and called me back later. i by that point, was driving and tipsy, and handed off the phone to my friend for a second... bad move...
then it all just went to shit. oh well im such a clutz, handing the phone off to my drunk friend who had taken her on a date years ago, who had to bring it up..
its a bitch... i have pretty much given up on chasing girls...
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: ZippoZ]
#5732871 - 06/10/06 12:52 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Yeah man, it sucks sometimes. I swear with the ones I want...nothing ever happens, I make an ass out of myself, or it goes to shit quickly. But, the ones that I don't want I end up going out with for a while or in bed with.
Will God please let me get with (and stay with) a girl that I really am attracted to and that I like? Fuck no...that asshole doesn't like me.
Edited by RandalFlagg (06/10/06 12:55 AM)
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5732878 - 06/10/06 12:54 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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oh you know what the worst part is?
you end up with this girl you kind of want, and then every other girl you have ever wanted is up on your nuts... like as soon as you have a girl, they are all over you...
Like i said, im tired of the games and chasing and bullshit. if somthing happens, ill be greatful. yeah there are a few girls out there that i would love to be with, but im just letting things happen if they do. i dont have time for the bs...
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: ZippoZ]
#5732895 - 06/10/06 12:59 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Seriously, shit like this is like some cruel cosmic joke. God is fucking with us on purpose.
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5732904 - 06/10/06 01:01 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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yeah, i laugh at it sometimes., and sometimes i just pick up the 40 i have next to me, and i take a swig, and try to hold back the tears :cry:
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5732980 - 06/10/06 01:35 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Jesus Christ I whine a lot. 
My most recent threads are this and the thread about me being hassled by black dudes while I rode my bike.
I gotta stop whining.
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Grok
Has Been a Bad Boy


Registered: 12/03/03
Posts: 1,262
Loc: Greener Pastures
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5733771 - 06/10/06 10:41 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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It's a bad feeling knowing that you blew whatever shot you may have had. One of the worst in my opinion. I always used to let this happen. And it is important to realize that it is YOU letting this happen, not some cosmic joke from God. It took me awhile to get over this. Much chemical assistance...[edited due to poor advice] Alcohol sucks, ditch that crap. Really, you just need to be comfortable with who you are. And remember, many girls tend to love attention and often love to talk about themselves. You just have to feed that.
Also, exercise and stuff like that'll get you more confidence. Make friends with girls as well, don't approach every girl as relationship/sex material. You will learn a lot about women and it makes it much easier to talk to other women. They are people too.
-------------------- Entropy is increasing. To send me a PM, go to my journal
Edited by cilosyb (06/10/06 10:46 AM)
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Dreamer987
The VerbalHerman Munster


Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 5,326
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5733909 - 06/10/06 11:25 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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"Yes, I usually freeze when I come into contact with attractive women."
I used to have this same problem. Than i got a girlfriend, and now i don't have anything to worry about. I'm not trying to fuck them, so now they are just regular people that i don't have to try to impress.
"you end up with this girl you kind of want, and then every other girl you have ever wanted is up on your nuts... like as soon as you have a girl, they are all over you... "
Haha, yup, somehow i'm fuckable now that i have a girlfriend. If i didn't love her so much...
--------------------
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5734347 - 06/10/06 01:32 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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You have low self-esteem. Why?
What helps me in those situations....I know that later the next day, she's gonna take a massive shit....'cause she's human too. Fuck that. The minute you put a woman on a lofty pedestal, she'll only dissapoint and more than half of it will be your fault.
Bring the woman down off the pedestal, talk to her like you would an ugly chick who's your "friend" or your sister and just chill out.
"Never whistle while you're pissing." 'Cause your mind is split, duality. Same with a chick, stop "thinking" and just be. Just let it flow. Charisma doesn't happen if you want it to, you have to let it just ooze out.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Quote:
McKennaDMT said: You have low self-esteem. Why?
I don't necessarily think that it's low self-esteem. I just freak out when coming into contact with women that I'm attracted to. It's like they are mythical beings that scramble my brain or something.
But, you made a good point. I should realize that they are human just like me.
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5734791 - 06/10/06 04:47 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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It also helps to remember that men age better than women do. So if you're the shit at this age, you'll probably be even more the shit (??? ) when you're older.
So that hot piece of ass that causes you're penis to enlarge but your mental capacity to shrivel up, remember she'll look like a dry, withered grape in a few years (or decades ).
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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I am seriously flawed. My charisma comes and goes. I am the only person I know that has this trait. Everybody I know either has charisma and they have it all of the time or they don't have it at all. With me it comes and goes completely randomly.
There are times when I can talk to a woman I'm attracted to like she's just another person. But, most of the time I can't.
I missed all of the appropriate cues too. She said a few things about herself and I didn't follow up on them. For example, she talked about having to school the next day. Why the fuck didn't I ask her about her school? Women love talking about themselves usually. I just nodded my head and stared at the floor. 
After the fact, I can sit here and deconstruct everything I did wrong. I can think of stuff that I should have said and questions that I should have asked. Too late now though.
Edited by RandalFlagg (06/10/06 05:08 PM)
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5734984 - 06/10/06 05:40 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Did you give a shit about her talking about her life or did you just want to talk to her in teh hopes of de-pantsing her?
I find it incredibly hard to listen to anyone (especially women) when I don't give a fuck. It's one of the hardest things for me to do is to act interested.
But you're not alone. I have the same problem. Exactly the same problem. Most of the time I dont give a shit about how people view me or think of me or whatever, but then there's that once in awhile moment when I actually want to get to know someone and then I act completely self-conscious, wondering if what I'm saying or doing is fuckin retarded or not....
I try not to worry about it though....
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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Dared
Jared, Really.

Registered: 06/06/06
Posts: 33
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I'm not sure how alcohol brings out social anxiety in you.. most everyone I know finds the opposite effect. You are a freak!
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Dared]
#5735267 - 06/10/06 07:20 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I rarely drink.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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it happens to the best of us., again and again and again...
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Quote:
McKennaDMT said: Did you give a shit about her talking about her life or did you just want to talk to her in teh hopes of de-pantsing her?
I find it incredibly hard to listen to anyone (especially women) when I don't give a fuck. It's one of the hardest things for me to do is to act interested.
I don't know. I would love to de-pants her, but I would also like to talk her her. She's just so yummy that I don't know what to do with her.
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5736719 - 06/11/06 01:01 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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You sound like a girl. Be a man, grab some flesh and get the go ahead or the slap in the face, either way you'll know. And you'll be happy with yourself you were all alpha male and shit and took what you wanted. Rarrr!
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Quote:
Penguarky Tunguin said: You sound like a girl. Be a man, grab some flesh and get the go ahead or the slap in the face, either way you'll know. And you'll be happy with yourself you were all alpha male and shit and took what you wanted. Rarrr!
10-4
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Gillette
Jaded


Registered: 01/10/99
Posts: 4,058
Last seen: 6 months, 27 days
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5745277 - 06/13/06 10:11 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I love you guys, and you don't suck.
Honestly, that happens to everyone, you should see the stupid things I say and do or for that matter can't even say, because there I am standing mouth agap, thinking "omg I love you, I've only been thinking about you for-ever and now you actually talking to me, ok breathe look cool, god be cool" and then I just puke on them..
hows that for cool?
What I've learned, you can always recover from those awkward situations, even covering someone in cranberry puke, I usually just wait till I run into them again, apologise for being an ass and offer to make it up to them by buying them a coffee or something, ie: coffee date! I also console myself in the fact that they may not remember that I screwed up, I'm sure I forget alot of stupid things guys have said and done, either that or I thought their nervousness was cute....so you could hope for that too.
-------------------- ~Earth is the Insane Asylum of the Universe~ A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery


Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5745455 - 06/13/06 11:33 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said:
Quote:
Penguarky Tunguin said: You sound like a girl. Be a man, grab some flesh and get the go ahead or the slap in the face, either way you'll know. And you'll be happy with yourself you were all alpha male and shit and took what you wanted. Rarrr!
10-4
You do suck Randal but not for the reasons you think. 
That crash course with Veritas is waiting for you.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Redstorm
Prince of Bugs



Registered: 10/08/02
Posts: 44,175
Last seen: 3 months, 11 days
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5745485 - 06/13/06 11:45 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Don't feel bad. I know how you feel to have problems with women.
The fact that I missed out on my single years in high school has made it so that I can not interact with females in any way other than as a friend. It's kind of irritating b/c I know I can be charming and sweet, but only in a platonic manner.
In other words: you're not alone!
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Redstorm]
#5745637 - 06/13/06 12:49 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Redstorm said: Don't feel bad. I know how you feel to have problems with women.
It's the ones that I really like/am attracted to that I seem to have the consistent problems with. 
Quote:
Redstorm said: In other words: you're not alone!
Dorky non-alpha males unite!
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5745672 - 06/13/06 01:02 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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it happens, try this itll help wiith yor confidence. but dont do it half assedly.
go up to any girl you find some what attractive, strike up a converstaion, get it going for atleast a minute or 2, say you have to go, but ask her to dinner later that night.
youll probably get a lot of girls that will go for it 
and itll build up your confidence, which is a damn good thing.
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: ZippoZ]
#5745837 - 06/13/06 01:50 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
zippoz said: go up to any girl you find some what attractive, strike up a converstaion, get it going for atleast a minute or 2, say you have to go, but ask her to dinner later that night.
youll probably get a lot of girls that will go for it 
and itll build up your confidence, which is a damn good thing.
Man...I'm really shy. I have a hard time doing that kind of stuff.
I dated a hot woman several months ago. It wasn't super hard to talk to her because she works at my school. I was able to come up with stuff to talk to her about and to go see her about. It was one of those rare occurrences where I didn't completely clam up with a hottie. But, pulling conversation out of my ass with a hottie that I don't know and that I have nothing in common with? That is a tall order for me.
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adamj
Superhero


Registered: 11/11/03
Posts: 1,562
Loc: Ontario, CAN
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5746918 - 06/13/06 07:19 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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It's like basketball.
If you suck at basketball, how do you get better.
You play and practise basketball.
If you're ever out looking for a job, get a people one. Like I have been working at a restaurant for the last half year or so. It's done wonders because there are so many co-workers you can talk to and socialize. A lot of those co-workers were girls, and it helped me a lot.
Start lifting some weights to increase the strength of your body AND personality and spirit. Buy some good new clothes. Go fucking get them girls!!! YEE HAWWW!!!! PUSSY!!!!
hahaha I couldn't resist. Gotta love being a guy, no?
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: adamj]
#5747388 - 06/13/06 09:14 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
adamj said: Start lifting some weights to increase the strength of your body AND personality and spirit.
Everybody here keeps saying this. I do work out and I'm actually in pretty decent shape. I'm not afraid to take my shirt off at the beach.
Quote:
adamj said: If you're ever out looking for a job, get a people one. Like I have been working at a restaurant for the last half year or so. It's done wonders because there are so many co-workers you can talk to and socialize. A lot of those co-workers were girls, and it helped me a lot.
Yeah, that's a good idea. I haven't had an "out in public" job for a while. It might help to build some social skills with 'da hotties.
Edited by RandalFlagg (06/13/06 09:15 PM)
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Gillette]
#5747422 - 06/13/06 09:24 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Gillette said: What I've learned, you can always recover from those awkward situations
Yeah, I'm going to go back out to the same bar this Friday. I'm sure she'll be there because I think my buddy (which is her friend as well) will be DJ'ing again. Here's my plan: I'm going to walk in and smile at her. I'm going to engage in small talk ("How are you") etc.. Then I'm going to head over to the pool tables and one of my friends that I bring with me will lose miserably so I look like a badass pool shark (I am actually decent at pool anyway). Then I will buy her a drink and start more in-depth small talk ("Where do you go to school at") etc..
Two hours later.... 
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DoctorJ


Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5747798 - 06/13/06 11:02 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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it helps your conversation skills to put sex out of your mind when talking to a female.
try to look at her as a person with an intersting character that you would like to learn from, instead of a hot sex godess that you want to bang.
If you approach women as people, treat them like friends, and respect their minds and emotions as well as their bodies, your chances of success will be much higher, and your relationships will be more deep and fulfilling.
Try not to think of sex, but instead treat her as a human and get to know her. If she likes you (and she probably does), SHE will direct the relationship towards sex with subtle cues. Its your job as a man to pick up these cues and act on them at the appropriate moment.
You can get super hot chicks that are way out of your league simply by playing it cool and not being a total shag-hound. Instead of directing all of your energy towards getting in her pants, try to direct it towards getting in her head. Figure out what she wants and give it to her if it is within your power to do so. If its a good match, once you are in her head, she will want you in her pants. She'll try to let you know without being direct. Some women are really bad at this, and that's why you have to train yourself to be receptive.
Basically, give the power of sex, the freedom of choice, to them, the women. Then use your mind to guide them to the right choice with that power, ie- your cock.
this is such a rare strategy that it really works on most women, even the super-gorgeous chicks you think are off limits to a guy like you. The hardest part is to be able to tell that its working! You don't know how many opportunities I've blown with beautiful girls simply bcause I didn't realize that my natural charm had them hooked.
The key is perception and timing. The girl I just recently hooked up with is someone I've known for a year at least. Neither one of us realized the other liked us! Since we got together, we've been kicking ourselves for not doing it sooner.
anyway, love can be a frustrating, war-torn battlefield, even for extremely intelligent people who completely understand the rules of the game. Our emotions and minds can overpower us and keep us from our goals. Master yourself, and everything will come to you. At that point, your greatest challenge will be reaching out and grabbing what is yours as it moves by on the conveyor belt.
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ZippoZ
Knomadic


Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5747827 - 06/13/06 11:09 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said:
Quote:
zippoz said: go up to any girl you find some what attractive, strike up a converstaion, get it going for atleast a minute or 2, say you have to go, but ask her to dinner later that night.
youll probably get a lot of girls that will go for it 
and itll build up your confidence, which is a damn good thing.
Man...I'm really shy. I have a hard time doing that kind of stuff.
I dated a hot woman several months ago. It wasn't super hard to talk to her because she works at my school. I was able to come up with stuff to talk to her about and to go see her about. It was one of those rare occurrences where I didn't completely clam up with a hottie. But, pulling conversation out of my ass with a hottie that I don't know and that I have nothing in common with? That is a tall order for me.
thats why im saying only talk for a minute or two, but keep it going, no pauses (of the awkward kind) and if you do it to 10 strangers, who you are never going to see again, it dosent matter!
and women love confidence, asking them out like that is going to a) flatter them, and b) show them that youre confident.
its fun to do as well grab a friend from your area and take turns
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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Twister
Lucrative


Registered: 06/12/03
Posts: 6,672
Loc: Midwest
Last seen: 14 years, 20 days
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5748057 - 06/14/06 12:33 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Just don't worry about it so much. I used to worry about talking to girls alot but as I realized that they're just a flawed as me it started to come easier. It may not seem very easy but that girl probably said just as much dumb shit as you, you were just too concerned with what you were saying to notice. Or maybe what you thought was dumb shit she didn't think was too dumb, or maybe she saw your anxiety as endearing if she even noticed. So basically just act natural and don't psyche yourself out. Just don't put that pussy on a pedestal.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Twister]
#5751229 - 06/14/06 09:14 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Shit...I need some hardcore advice now.
It turns out that my buddy is not DJ'ing at that bar. Therefore, I will not see "the girl" this Friday. I have no clue when I will see her next.
I did however find her Myspace page. Should I send her a friend's request? I was thinking of sending the request and then sending a Myspace message to her that had a funny boozing picture (like this Shroomery one):

I was going to say something like, "Hey, I remember you when I was all boozed up!"
Does this sound like a good plan? I'm afraid that I will come across as creepy, desperate, lame, or worse though. The only time I'm successful with women is when the woman pursues me or when things click naturally enough that neither of us has to do any pursuing. Whenever I actively pursue women it always seems to go to shit.
Edited by RandalFlagg (06/14/06 09:20 PM)
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Redstorm
Prince of Bugs



Registered: 10/08/02
Posts: 44,175
Last seen: 3 months, 11 days
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5751584 - 06/14/06 10:22 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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That's not creepy. Go for it!
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Redstorm]
#5751632 - 06/14/06 10:33 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I need at least one or two more affirmatives before I do it.
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Noetical
Flip Horrorshow

Registered: 11/28/04
Posts: 9,230
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5751737 - 06/14/06 10:55 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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affirmative but you need a better line
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Noetical]
#5751752 - 06/14/06 10:59 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Noetical said: affirmative but you need a better line
Agreed.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Osker246]
#5751755 - 06/14/06 11:00 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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What should this better line be?
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5751809 - 06/14/06 11:12 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I honestly wouldnt say anything like "I remember you when I was boozed up!". Epecially if this is a person your trying to impress; you dont want to make yourself look like to much of a fool. If I ever got a message like that I wouldnt know what to think of the person.
I'd just send a friend request w/ a message starting with some small talk like "hey! I just ran accross your page and thought I'd see how things are goin?" ya know something along those lines. But if you can pull off something comical like a picture and start the convo going then go for it.
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adamj
Superhero


Registered: 11/11/03
Posts: 1,562
Loc: Ontario, CAN
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5751849 - 06/14/06 11:21 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Mmm you should contact her via myspace, but then throw in "Im not too big a fan of email chat, can I call you?" (or something along those lines. Like email is okay, but the phone is so much better)
It seems like a pretty neutral way of telling her you like her.
Then when she says yes and gives you her phone number, and says to call in 10 minutes --- that's when you can shit your pants with anxiety 
you can do it man
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Osker246]
#5751922 - 06/14/06 11:43 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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I can understand how talking about being all boozed up would be weird.
How about:
1. "Hey! I remember you from the bar." 2. "You're that person from the bar."
Oh man those are bad...help me out here.
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MOTH
Wild Woman


Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5751963 - 06/14/06 11:58 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Just tell the truth...you don't have to flower it all up or anything.
"You are pretty unforgetable...I remember you from when we met at the XYZ bar. Mind if we chat or talk sometime?"
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5751974 - 06/15/06 12:02 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Ok lets do some improvising.
1. "Hey! Its (insert name here) from the bar. I just came accross your page and wanted to say hi. How ya been?"
Then just work your way up to something you both talk about.
2."Hey, you look really familiar to me for some reason. Have we meet before? I think we meet at (name of place) but im not sure."
If you use somehting like this just hope she remembers you. If she does remember you, just apologize and say you have a short memory while drinking. Then just continue the convo. from there.
uhhh theres alot more way im just not thinking clearly. But just be yourself and play it cool theres no need to get hyped up about it now. Just wait till your baggin her then you can get hyped up as much as ya want.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: MOTH]
#5753174 - 06/15/06 11:11 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
EllemyshShade said: Just tell the truth...you don't have to flower it all up or anything.
"You are pretty unforgetable...I remember you from when we met at the XYZ bar. Mind if we chat or talk sometime?"
That sounds good in theory...but whenever I try forward stuff like that with women that I am attracted to I fail miserably.
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DoctorJ


Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5753199 - 06/15/06 11:15 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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how bout:
"Hey, its me from the bar. Look, I kinda have a little crush on you. If you don't feel the same, please let me know so I can stop thinking about you and spend my time wuing someone else."

could work. I dunno, man, just say something YOU would say. Be yourself.
what you should be hoping for is a good match. Don't hope for one particular chick, instead hope that you find a good match. A good match will be a girl that doesn't make you step outside your comfort zone to get with her.
Its like when I got my aids test. At first, I was praying that I was negative, then I realized that was silly, and just simply prayed that the test would be accurate.
And thats what you want, man. Accuracy. You shouldn't want the chick that you want, you should want the chick that is an accurate match. If that happens to be the chick that you are currently enamoured with, great! If not, don't kick yourself- just keep looking for the lock that fits your key! You won't know who fits unless you TRY a few girls.
Don't get attached to possibilities. They frequently don't pan out in reality. Instead, TRY to make those possibilities a reality. If you fail, move on. Eventually you will find a possibility that CAN be a reality, and when it becomes a reality, be attached to THAT.
A bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush, I guess is what I'm saying.
try, try, try again. Eventually, you will be successful, but success tends to come only after the endurance of many failures.
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MOTH
Wild Woman


Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5753486 - 06/15/06 12:49 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said:
Quote:
EllemyshShade said: Just tell the truth...you don't have to flower it all up or anything.
"You are pretty unforgetable...I remember you from when we met at the XYZ bar. Mind if we chat or talk sometime?"
That sounds good in theory...but whenever I try forward stuff like that with women that I am attracted to I fail miserably.
Maybe the more simple the saying the better.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: MOTH]
#5753569 - 06/15/06 01:20 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Maybe the more simple the saying the better.
..Me...want...sex....ugh!
Edited by RandalFlagg (06/15/06 01:23 PM)
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5754368 - 06/15/06 05:24 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Fuck it. I just sent her a friend's request. I did not send a message to her though.
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5754372 - 06/15/06 05:25 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Your one step closer
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Osker246]
#5754399 - 06/15/06 05:30 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Osker246 said: Your one step closer
....to getting shot down.
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5754485 - 06/15/06 05:47 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Dont think so negative of yourself man. Women love men full of confidence. Just give it all you got cause theres only one way to find out.
When I was in highschool there was a time where I had the same problem with you. I was head over heels for one of my friends who is one of those people you meet once in a lifetime. I've never really been good with the ladies either so sadly enough I never did anything about it. Im actually still not all that great with women...shit... 
But turns out she had a thing for me too. But I didnt find this out till after graduation and she was already dating somebody else and moved to NYC. So now I live with the regret of not ever doing anything about it.
Just give it all ya got man. You live and you learn. Whats the worst that can happen?
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Osker246]
#5754499 - 06/15/06 05:51 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Osker246 said: But turns out she had a thing for me too. But I didnt find this out till after graduation and she was already dating somebody else and moved to NYC. So now I live with the regret of not ever doing anything about it.
Story of my fucking life. In high school I can think of four girls that I had massive crushes on and it turns out that three of them felt the same way about me. I was just too much of a pussy to do anything about it. I ended up only dating/fucking women that threw themselves at me so that I didn't have to do any of the work.
Quote:
Osker246 said: Just give it all ya got man. You live and you learn. Whats the worst that can happen?
Complete and utter rejection.
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5754512 - 06/15/06 05:54 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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ok , Jesus
I'll take you on a date if it will shut you up
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5754521 - 06/15/06 05:55 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Osker246 said: Just give it all ya got man. You live and you learn. Whats the worst that can happen?
Complete and utter rejection.
Rejection isnt so bad the week after
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Osker246
Stranger


Registered: 07/10/03
Posts: 1,479
Loc: Washington
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: goobler]
#5754531 - 06/15/06 05:56 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: Osker246]
#5754667 - 06/15/06 06:22 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Drugs were invented to help men forget about the female's rejection.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: goobler]
#5754900 - 06/15/06 07:27 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
goobler said: ok , Jesus
I'll take you on a date if it will shut you up
I have every right to snivel and whine like an emasculated pussy.
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5755045 - 06/15/06 08:04 PM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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You sure enact the right at every chance.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Exciting update!
The aforementioned girl approved my Myspace friend's request. But, I deleted my Myspace page about a week ago.
Today, I was riding my bike and I saw her walking with a friend on the sidewalk. She looked mind-bendingly hot and I got all freaked out and quickly pedaled my bike across the street and pretended not to see her. 

GO RANDAL!!!
Edited by RandalFlagg (08/08/06 07:50 PM)
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery


Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5945741 - 08/08/06 09:09 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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California dreaming on such a winters day.
It's just pussy Randal. You make it into something with your addictive desires. If you ever get there you will find something else.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Phoshaman
Litteringannnnddddd?


Registered: 06/01/99
Posts: 1,557
Loc: FLAHHHIDAAA
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: DoctorJ] 1
#5946117 - 08/08/06 11:14 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
DoctorJ said: how bout:
"Hey, its me from the bar. Look, I kinda have a little crush on you. If you don't feel the same, please let me know so I can stop thinking about you and spend my time wuing someone else."

could work. I dunno, man, just say something YOU would say. Be yourself.
what you should be hoping for is a good match. Don't hope for one particular chick, instead hope that you find a good match. A good match will be a girl that doesn't make you step outside your comfort zone to get with her.
Its like when I got my aids test. At first, I was praying that I was negative, then I realized that was silly, and just simply prayed that the test would be accurate.
And thats what you want, man. Accuracy. You shouldn't want the chick that you want, you should want the chick that is an accurate match. If that happens to be the chick that you are currently enamoured with, great! If not, don't kick yourself- just keep looking for the lock that fits your key! You won't know who fits unless you TRY a few girls.
Don't get attached to possibilities. They frequently don't pan out in reality. Instead, TRY to make those possibilities a reality. If you fail, move on. Eventually you will find a possibility that CAN be a reality, and when it becomes a reality, be attached to THAT.
A bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush, I guess is what I'm saying.
try, try, try again. Eventually, you will be successful, but success tends to come only after the endurance of many failures.
Man... I don't know how people haven't been responsive to your advice in this thread, but it is dead on.
kudos to doctorj.
--------------------
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dr_gonz
Registered: 08/18/03
Posts: 44,654
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: dr_gonz]
#5946259 - 08/09/06 12:16 AM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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I know guys. I was just trying to be funny.
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: God, I fucking suck [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5954646 - 08/11/06 06:28 PM (17 years, 5 months ago) |
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Stop.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Yes sir.
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