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Anonotron
Your mother

Registered: 05/17/06
Posts: 31
Loc: deep within the caverns o...
Last seen: 17 years, 5 months
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Good calling out from work excuses
#5663572 - 05/23/06 10:24 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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I've used all the classics...a billion times (stomach flu, flat tire, car won't start, stabbed my girlfriend and have to hide the body before the cops show up, etc)
I need good, unquestionable reasons as to why I'm not coming in this pit for a day or two at a time.
Thanks for looking at my wiener...I mean thread.
-------------------- Results speak louder than words.
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663580 - 05/23/06 10:26 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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my favorite has always been "sorry, I'm feeling too good to come to work today, I'll be at the lake"
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Corporal Kielbasa

Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,235
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663584 - 05/23/06 10:27 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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i always like the i'm not coming into work today line.......
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Anonotron
Your mother

Registered: 05/17/06
Posts: 31
Loc: deep within the caverns o...
Last seen: 17 years, 5 months
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It's obvious that you guys have bosses that are far less douche baggy than my bosses.
-------------------- Results speak louder than words.
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MarijunaIsGood4U
I'M A GHOST,GHOST,GHOST,GHOST,GHOST


Registered: 03/30/06
Posts: 407
Loc: Canada
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663594 - 05/23/06 10:28 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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try: my ex-girlfriend came over and she's telling me that she's pregnant, FUCK!
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domite
Puppet

Registered: 04/12/03
Posts: 2,978
Loc: Who's askin'?
Last seen: 10 years, 5 months
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Day you had a violent episode of diarrhea.
They wont ask any questions.
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monamine
dork


Registered: 04/28/06
Posts: 1,089
Loc: Florida, US
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663618 - 05/23/06 10:37 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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kidney stone
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663649 - 05/23/06 10:43 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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"I have the shits"
always works
and if you have to still come in shit your pants and ask to go home
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663650 - 05/23/06 10:43 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonotron said: It's obvious that you guys have bosses that are far less douche baggy than my bosses.
nope, mine throws temper tantrums at the drop of a hat, he's 50 fucking years old and still acts like he's 3
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663667 - 05/23/06 10:47 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonotron said: It's obvious that you guys have bosses that are far less douche baggy than my bosses.
nah, mines a real asshole
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OneMoreRobot3021


Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 61,024
Loc: the sky
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: goobler]
#5663673 - 05/23/06 10:49 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
goobler said: "I have the shits"
always works
and if you have to still come in shit your pants and ask to go home
Seriously, that ALWAYS works. What you do is call and don't say exactly what's wrong but make it clear it's your stomach, and just be like "I really don't want to go into it.." and they won't wanna hear about it and will rush to get off the phone.
-------------------- Acid doesn't give you truths; it builds machines that push the envelope of perception. Whatever revelations came to me then have dissolved like skywriting. All I really know is that those few years saddled me with a faith in the redemptive potential of the imagination which, however flat, stale and unprofitable the world seems to me now, I cannot for the life of me shake. -Erik Davis
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adamj
Superhero


Registered: 11/11/03
Posts: 1,562
Loc: Ontario, CAN
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663861 - 05/23/06 11:28 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Say you've pulled your back out while at the gym, hurts to stand etc.
i've done that one
my boss called me a nob but in a funny way lol
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: adamj]
#5663869 - 05/23/06 11:29 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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never, ever, never mention a back/neck injury to your employer
unless its on a workers comp claim
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Anonotron
Your mother

Registered: 05/17/06
Posts: 31
Loc: deep within the caverns o...
Last seen: 17 years, 5 months
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: goobler]
#5663913 - 05/23/06 11:37 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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haha....me at a gym.
-------------------- Results speak louder than words.
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Rambel
Stranger

Registered: 07/09/05
Posts: 128
Last seen: 16 years, 9 months
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663941 - 05/23/06 11:43 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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I once told my boss that I had witnessed an assault, had to go to the police station to give a report, and I wouldn't know how long it would take. Worked for me.
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Rambel]
#5663945 - 05/23/06 11:44 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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yea but that can too easily be checked out
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Roadkill
Retired Shroomery Mod


Registered: 12/11/01
Posts: 22,674
Loc: Montana
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663964 - 05/23/06 11:47 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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I got food poisoned...and I'm pissin out my ass!~
I'm having my wisdom teeth removed...
My grandma died...hate when they ask where to send the flowers!~
I'm in jail...
I'm in detox...
I'm in rehab...
My old lady left me...
My truck is broke...
My dog died...
wait...thats a country song!~
I'm going fishin....take your job an shove it!~

tc
-------------------- Laterz, Road Who the hell you callin crazy? You wouldn't know what crazy was if Charles Manson was eating froot loops on your front porch! Brainiac said: PM the names with on there names, that means they have mushrooms for sale.
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Microcosmatrix
Spiral staircasetechnician


Registered: 10/20/05
Posts: 11,293
Loc: Ythan's house
Last seen: 17 years, 1 month
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: Anonotron]
#5663984 - 05/23/06 11:51 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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My shoestring broke, and so I have no shoe to come to work in...
My car has the sniffles today..
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tallgreen
chillin like avillain

Registered: 05/21/06
Posts: 293
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: goobler]
#5664014 - 05/23/06 11:55 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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I'm lucky to have a nice boss. But in terms of making an excuse, does it matter? Do you get credit for having fucked up things happen to you. If you call in sick a lot it seems like they won't beleive whatever you say. I wouldn't if I were your boss and this was a regular thing. If I were in your situation I would keep it private. Like, "I have to take some time of for 'personal' reasons". Make it sound serious and private, like it would be an invasion to ask for more details. Then they will make up your excuse for you.
-------------------- Nothing you can know that isn't known. Nothing you can see that isn't shown. Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be. It's easy. All you need is love. - The Beatles
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Microcosmatrix
Spiral staircasetechnician


Registered: 10/20/05
Posts: 11,293
Loc: Ythan's house
Last seen: 17 years, 1 month
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Re: Good calling out from work excuses [Re: tallgreen]
#5664037 - 05/23/06 11:58 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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If you're working any kind of trades job and you tell your boss: "I have to take some time of for 'personal' reasons"
He'll tell you to go ahead and take the rest of the fuckin' year off.
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