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Grok
Has Been a Bad Boy


Registered: 12/03/03
Posts: 1,262
Loc: Greener Pastures
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
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^^^Solid adive.
It seems like you have let this girl become the complete center of your life. Trust me, I know exactly how this is - NOT healthy for a relationship. After spending so much time together one of you will end up feeling like your life is getting stagnant and you will detach yourself from the situation. Sounds like that is the direction she was headed maybe?
This is hard and is something I am having to deal with right now. My girl became the total center of my life, and it really dragged me down to a low level. I couldn't take it anymore. I have no social life outside of her where I'm at now - at the end of my freshman year of college - when I should have a awesome social life. Its not her fault really...it just happens because you think spending all your time together is great. But you need to get out and make some friends and let her do the same. I know its hard when she has a social life and maybe you don't - it seems unfair and you will feel bad when she's out having fun and you're stomping around in the mud worrying about what she's up to. Been there and hope I don't EVER fucking go back.
2 days is NOTHING. Think of how much you would miss her if you couldn't talk to her for 2 weeks. Ween yourself off a bit now. Take this time to reflect. Take several days apart from time to time. Work on this man or you will find yourself in my situation and it sucks balls for sure!!
-------------------- Entropy is increasing. To send me a PM, go to my journal
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hybridphil
Student

Registered: 03/04/04
Posts: 323
Loc: Milky Way....they'll neve...
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: Relationship problems [Re: Grok]
#5706525 - 06/03/06 01:53 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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Yeah I'm doing by best and it's geting better. I used to keep tripping out and think that she would be calling or texting me and my phone was ringing...but every time I'd check, there was nobody calling...Now, I leave my phone laying around and if she calls, she can leave a message. I'm telling myself that I can't always be thinking about her and it's slowly getting better.
I am pretty stubborn to change, and over a week ago a huge change came over me. I am slowly getting adjusted to it, and am actually finding it healthier for myself. I definitely want her IN my life, but not to BE my life. I was happy today because for the first time in a lil while my gf calls me to say she misses me out of the blue. She used to do that all the time, but over the last couple weeks, I think she's seen that I've been insecure and maybe didn't miss that about me. I think now she sees that I'm strong about it and emotionally stable and that's something she misses.
I'm finding myself time for friends I haven't seen in a while, and most of all time to skate. Been ripping up the skateparks last week, sometimes out of anger and frustration at the situation, and it always made me feel better. I think I can go without my gf for a day and not break a sweat, but I wonder if I can go without skating for a day now...Replacing one addiction with another. Well, all for the better! Thanks again for your replies and I'll keep you posted.
-------------------- Psilocybin anonymous
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DirtMcgirt
in a pinch


Registered: 10/20/04
Posts: 2,213
Loc: city of angels
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Re: Relationship problems [Re: hybridphil]
#5706667 - 06/03/06 03:39 AM (17 years, 7 months ago) |
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You seem to have the right head on your shoulders...remember, go with your gut and don't forget *you* come first. And always carry with you the possibility that this relationship could end and that is not necessarily a bad thing. It's how human relationships work.
Good luck, bro.
-------------------- "And we, inhabitants of the great coral of the Cosmos, believe the atom (which still we cannot see) to be full matter, whereas, it too, like everything else, is but an embroidery of voids in the Void, and we give the name of being, dense and even eternal, to that dance of inconsistencies, that infinite extension that is identified with absolute Nothingness and that spins from its own non-being the illusion of everything."
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hybridphil
Student

Registered: 03/04/04
Posts: 323
Loc: Milky Way....they'll neve...
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: Relationship problems [Re: DirtMcgirt]
#6332518 - 12/04/06 10:56 AM (17 years, 1 month ago) |
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It has been a while since I started this thread. I'm glad I didn't break up this girl at that time. Maybe it wouldn't have been as painful, but I'm glad I got to be with her for longer and I can't say that I wasn't happy as hard as it was. We just broke up last night. We live together, we have a dog, and yes it's complicated. We both really love each other and we're going to work through it. I am crushed and have been crying for the last 11 hours. I don't think I have any tears left, yet they still keep coming. I don't see a life without her right now, and that makes it so much harder for me. She said that she needs to find herself and she needs independence through it. We ARE only 19 and as big a deal as I'm making this, it really was. We've been living together day in, day out for almost 2 years, we've been to Thailand for 2 months, we've been through a lot and every memory of mine from the last 2 years is with her. Right now, I don't even know if I can physically withdraw myself from this girl. I am so depressed right now as it seems everything in my life is going wrong. I broke my foot about 2 months ago, and I can never skate again, I got my iPod stolen a week ago, I got a ticket 2 weeks ago which will get my license suspended, my car's oil cooler lines broke and now it don't work and now I'm losing the best thing that ever happened to me. I am so attached to her, but I'll do it in her best interest. She is also the only friend that I have and my best friend. I plan on continuing being best friends with her for as long as possible. If we were meant to be together, then one day, we will. I won't keep my hopes up. I don't regret anything.
LOVE = DRUG = CHEMICAL REACTION LOVE = BLIND = HOPELESS
I don't know where to start with letting her go...
-------------------- Psilocybin anonymous
Edited by hybridphil (12/04/06 10:59 AM)
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: Relationship problems [Re: hybridphil]
#6332570 - 12/04/06 11:14 AM (17 years, 1 month ago) |
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Start by living moment to moment, hour to hour and go from there. IT's all you really can do. Try and laugh a bit too. Love is not the emotion that binds the universe, humor is.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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foureyes
i against i
Registered: 09/30/06
Posts: 53
Last seen: 16 years, 30 days
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same things have happened to everyone man, she's using you. and you gotta get back at her by using her and having really degrading sex with her and then cheating on her also
-------------------- with my third eye, I focus with
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Relationship problems [Re: hybridphil]
#6337048 - 12/05/06 03:49 PM (17 years, 1 month ago) |
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Damn, shit like this sucks. It is like cutting your arm off when you end it with somebody that you are extremely close to. It hurts a LOT.
You need to move on it sounds like. It's hard but it is the healthiest thing to do.
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