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quillini
one meanmotorscooter


Registered: 04/18/06
Posts: 255
Last seen: 1 year, 9 months
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Re: sigh...... [Re: sui]
#5657083 - 05/21/06 04:39 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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All I can say is, you have to find some way to live your own life and be happy in it. YOUR life, that's "your" in the singular, not meaning "you all's" for lack of a better English expression.
The two of you--that is over. That was a chapter in your life, it was great, it has ended. She's gone now. If she said, after not talking to you for so long, "I'm busy, I'll call you back," I think you will find she's going to be busy for a really long time. I've been there, man. In some ways I still am there, and I'm writing all this to myself as well as you.
You've got to find yourself, and that can't include her. You've got to go places you haven't been and meet people you haven't known. Feeling sorry for yourself isn't the way to do any of this. I feel like I'm preaching right now, so I'll just post a story that made me feel 10x better back when I was in the shit like you are now. It's by Anton Chekhov, and it's called "Ariadne".
http://www.classicreader.com/read.php/sid.6/bookid.2052/
Also, if you haven't watched "Swingers", that movie helped me a lot as well.
Things will get better. You're so fucking money and you don't even know it. You don't need this girl in order to be happy. How long it takes for you to figure this out is up to you.
Good luck!
-------------------- No; truth, being alive, was not halfway between anything. It was only to be found by continuous excursions into either realm, and though proportion is the final secret, to espouse it at the outset is to insure sterility. Only connect...
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Gillette
Jaded


Registered: 01/10/99
Posts: 4,058
Last seen: 6 months, 27 days
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I know everyone is saying just get over it, but it takes time, you can't just block that stuff out, it'll get better, you'll work through it, it gets easier and easier. Just try to look at the things you've learned from the experience and go from there, do what you have to do to heal. Feel free to pm me if you want to talk it out.
Quote:
Corporal Kielbasa said: Women like the guys that dont give a fuck
I had a guy I work with say this a few days ago, I was offended. I don't think its true, I think maybe chicks just make bad choices sometimes.
-------------------- ~Earth is the Insane Asylum of the Universe~ A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.
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kake
The answer to1984 is 1776.



Registered: 05/06/99
Posts: 2,782
Loc: The 66th harmonic
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Re: sigh...... [Re: Gillette]
#5658031 - 05/21/06 08:51 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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meeting someone else is the hard part...
after being in 2 2+year relationships, the hardest thing ive found when it comes to meeting a new girl is shaking off that ive been committed to someone vibe i think girls somehow pick up on, not using the same old cliche BS to get the chick interested.
-------------------- The answer to 1984 is 1776.
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Gillette
Jaded


Registered: 01/10/99
Posts: 4,058
Last seen: 6 months, 27 days
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Re: sigh...... [Re: kake]
#5658039 - 05/21/06 08:54 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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oh yeah, chicks can totally tell if your used to having a girlfriend.
-------------------- ~Earth is the Insane Asylum of the Universe~ A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.
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KaptKid
Spaced Pirate


Registered: 12/11/03
Posts: 6,252
Loc: Bright Side of the Sun
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
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Re: sigh...... [Re: sui]
#5658183 - 05/21/06 09:37 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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"Guys if you have someone you love, make sure they know it and dont let it get away."
Sounds like she wants to get away. Did you really lose something? You want know till your in your 60's or 70's. Got to live life to know life.
Its never any fun getting your heart ripped out.
In time you will find peace with in yourself.
-------------------- Child of the 60's, Tripping ever since.
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Sihaya
Newbie
Registered: 05/17/06
Posts: 63
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
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Re: sigh...... [Re: Gillette]
#5658187 - 05/21/06 09:37 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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...
Edited by Sihaya (05/26/06 11:59 AM)
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sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
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Re: sigh...... [Re: Vvellum]
#5659027 - 05/22/06 01:48 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
bi0 said: move on meet someone new you're probably creeping her out.
throw everything away that reminds her of you delete her phone number...and email. whatever you have to do to cut yourself off.
and then meet someone else this is the only way to move on.
I havent talked to her in months beofre today. I wasnt freaking her out. She actually called me back like she said.
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
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eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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Re: sigh...... [Re: sui]
#5659033 - 05/22/06 01:54 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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so howed it go? was she happy to hear from you? or uninterested?? or... what?
spill the gossip man!
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
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sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
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Re: sigh...... [Re: sui]
#5659101 - 05/22/06 03:01 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Well this is the chick that married my friend 4 months after we separated. She considers me a friend now. God i hate that.
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
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sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
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Quote:
McKennaDMT said: What do you to do to maintain a level of comfort and happiness for yourself?
 playing music is the only thing that keeps me sane.
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
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Phychotron
Crazy Mofo



Registered: 06/17/02
Posts: 9,102
Loc: In A Forest Of Colossal F...
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Re: sigh...... [Re: sui]
#5659129 - 05/22/06 03:24 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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wow, i've got the same problem you do... 5 yrs together, she's been gone a month... i'm over it though 
nah, you just have to know theres nothing you can do, there's nothing you can do. nothing is going to get you 2 back together, just know that, accept it. if you really love her, than you will accept her as your friend, and know your boundries--they've been set. she'll respect that more than obsessing over her, it really puts a wedge between you two, and every time you go for it, the hammer strikes. just tell her how you feel, be honest, simple, and to the point. no one likes reading a long sob email like that. know you you feel before you tell her, no beating around the bush trying to figure out what your heart means... talking to her will help bring the case to a close. obviously the relationship ended for a reason, it was a big step but she took it (or you took it, i dunno). just know that it was a long, thought out calculated move on someone's part to end a long term relationship.
each time we fail at something, we have that much more knowledge the next time we make an attempt.
obsession will drive ya insane... i know a lot of that first hand.. you just have to let it go man... let it go.
-------------------- On a mission to prove that the truth gets you no where. They tried the truth, It didn't work. Then they wrote the bible.
Only the foolish fear the inevitable.
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