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Jackenobi
Hermes


Registered: 05/06/06
Posts: 1,355
Last seen: 6 years, 3 months
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A serious thread on not being a Nutter
#5635650 - 05/15/06 11:27 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Been triggered to make a post by a related thread...
"Did you exchange, a walk on part in the war, for a lead role in a cage?" - Roger Waters, Wish You Were Here, Pink Floyd
So im wondering. Can you consider yourself recovered from paranoid or schitzophrenic/typic illusions/delusions without medication?
After a period of episodic occasions of this behaviour, mild to extreme, personal to social, do you think its possible to be adequately healed by your own willpower, reasoning, and frankly, your return to the original and much missed reality?
Do you think any scars the psyche may carry may perhaps be further soothed by medical intervention?
These are my thoughts. After experiencing the sharper end of these debilitating behaviours and (quite truthfully!) after recent identifications with some posters' experiences here in the shroomery, I feel a return to (to abuse a little the Buddhist vernacular) Right Thought (sic) may be beginning to settle with me. I have long since stopped experiencing paranoic episodes and have made myself comfortable once again within my sphere of existence, but still have been subject to, watching, receding delusions of grandeur. I feel I may be comfortable and capable of discarding these harbourings from my mindset and psyche at long last.
Do you have any experience of the manner of psychological journey i have taken? If not, theoretically what do you think?
I still have some physical manifestations of the condition but feel better equipped to make peace with my mind after much arduous conflict with and within it. I would also be interested, as this is the shroomery, in what people think of an opinion i found of Terence McKenna, that these behaviours or manifestations (when not being taken to their extreme and causing profound discomfort) are a natural consequence in the subjective investigation of a higher psychic realm. I may have mis-paraphrased that. It was from his essay on Philip K. Dick if you are interested in this principle's proper context. Terence McKenna has also been a great recent help to think of myself less as a madman and clarify the processess that led to and populated my experiences. In itself, perception of self at its most basic level that has been distorted, in returning, feels an incredible blessing. I am just a regular guy that experienced some tough mutations of a mind's normality and reality. That i am not doomed to an unfortunate condition, but have perhaps experienced it and in understanding it can ameliorate past, present and (envisaged) future suffering i can strive for emotional and mental parity.
One of the biggest problems for the psyche i feel is the fear of being institutionalised, or otherwise incapacitated from the proper human experience of autonomous existence. A self-defeating circle of thought of course if you find you have fallen into it. It can be a lonely world on this particular path. Through willpower and time i have slowly reconstructed my middle-way.
So am i healed, or on the way to being healed? Should i seek further psychic healing or allow it to flow from an existence that hopes it may be steadily gaining more peace? Are there magic pills that will extinguish this infernal late night/early morning computer-sitting/ sometimes bedtime buzzing in my head!?!
All these questions and more to be answered (hopefully!) by you, my fellow shroomerite! I hope this is the correct place to put this post, as it is more or less 'my first day' with this forum.
My final wonder, if you have the patience, is how reckless would it be to take shrooms once again? It has been two years since i have taken any and my experiences were not explicitly born of shrooms, more weed and circumstance. I wonder that they may even have rejuvenatory psychic properties if used in appropriate conditions, with a mature attitude. For they, and other things, have truly shown me wonders, amongst the madness.
Perhaps i need to enjoy what i feel is a burgeoning positivity and enlightenment, against the backdrop of previous and admittedly gruelling and arduous times, in complete sobriety for a while before i consider experimenting with my perceptions again.
To ask once more, what would be best to balance the scales of a mind once greatly out of kilter? I am hoping to find a slow-burning solution of homogenous thought and attitude excersises if i ask myself most earnestly what i aim for from posting this semi-biographical topic.
All and Any thoughts and opinions, ideas, Would and Will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for perservering, it ended up a long one!
-------------------- read books
Edited by Jackenobi (05/16/06 01:31 AM)
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jcdangerously
I'll Cut You

Registered: 04/08/06
Posts: 422
Last seen: 17 years, 7 months
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Re: Anti-nutterism. Serious! [Re: Jackenobi]
#5635721 - 05/15/06 11:46 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Schizophrenia is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. Specifically, an excess of the neurotransmitter known as dopamine. Unfortunately, once it manifests, it's a safe bet that it is not ever going to regress to the point where your brain will resume functioning in a 'normal' capacity.
I am glad to hear that you are doing well, though. A very close relative of mine was afflicted by it and I am well aware of what a struggle dealing with it can be.
I encourage you to continue doing whatever is working for you. Meditation, 'psychic healing', whatever. But, more importantly, you ought to continue taking your prescribed medication as you do this. Consider it a failsafe, if you like.
As far as psychedelics, I would not recommend that you use them unless you are comfortable with the potential of your illness resurfacing.
Best of luck.
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Jackenobi
Hermes


Registered: 05/06/06
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Last seen: 6 years, 3 months
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Hi Jcdangerously thanks for the feedback. It is kind of the impression i get from my brain that it is not a reversable process! Sadly. Largely upsetting of course, but as you can probably tell from the inceptual post i feel im experiencing positive steps back to a healthy pshyche, in a new and cleaner level (fingers crossed) than my positive steps back have been in so far.
One thing though, i have never taken any medication. This is in part what i wanted to research with this post, if i were to look to be medicated, what would the benefits be?
Not necessarily a direct question to your good self!
Thanks for the kind wishes.
-------------------- read books
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soulcircus
Stranger


Registered: 05/09/06
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Re: Anti-nutterism. Serious! *DELETED* [Re: Jackenobi]
#5636602 - 05/16/06 07:51 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Post deleted by soulcircusReason for deletion: .
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery


Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: Anti-nutterism. Serious! [Re: soulcircus]
#5636798 - 05/16/06 09:24 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Which comes first the thought process or the chemical imbalance?
I do believe the right person can correct or adequately compensate for almost any problem.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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EquilibriuM
dream stalker

Registered: 07/17/05
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Re: Anti-nutterism. Serious! [Re: Icelander]
#5636831 - 05/16/06 09:36 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Icelander said: Which comes first the thought process or the chemical imbalance?
I do believe the right person can correct or adequately compensate for almost any problem.
-------------------- HELP!!!!!!!!!
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Jackenobi
Hermes


Registered: 05/06/06
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Re: Anti-nutterism. Serious! [Re: soulcircus]
#5636985 - 05/16/06 10:52 AM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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Its all been self diagnosis, recognising a period of what must be admitted as delusional thought processes.
All psychological or is it chemical? I dont know, but i have experienced strange awareness of the brain's secretions on occasions, or perhaps this is the physical manifestation of the chemical imbalance. Not pleasant to be able to feel such i can tell you, even though sometimes it felt pleasant, sometimes it felt bad and worried me about scarring etc.
So it would appear i have actually felt a chemical imbalance manifest itself in my head, gutting as it is it has to be admitted.
Maybe some effects are unavoidable and irreversable, its upsetting but i feel an eponymous enough candidate to adjust myself to new psychic circumstance.
-------------------- read books
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MarkostheGnostic
Elder


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Re: A serious thread on not being a Nutter [Re: Jackenobi]
#5637842 - 05/16/06 02:48 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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In my capacity as a mental health professional, I would say without reservations that any and all psychedelic substances are contraindicated for anyone who has suffered from a thought disorder (schizophrenia, all types; schizophreniform, schizoaffective, schizotypal disorders) or a transient psychotic episode.
-------------------- γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself
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Jackenobi
Hermes


Registered: 05/06/06
Posts: 1,355
Last seen: 6 years, 3 months
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I'm going to guess that italicised word means something along the lines of counter-intuitive but with more of an authoritive bumming
-------------------- read books
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EquilibriuM
dream stalker

Registered: 07/17/05
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Re: A serious thread on not being a Nutter [Re: Jackenobi]
#5638325 - 05/16/06 04:41 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
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hehe... I had to look it up..
-------------------- HELP!!!!!!!!!
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