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OfflinePurpleKush
Rational Lunatic
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Registered: 03/20/06
Posts: 3,421
Loc: Above The Law
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
dilemma
    #5616982 - 05/11/06 12:15 PM (17 years, 8 months ago)

im trying to figure out how to approach my parents to ask them for help getting a house.  im 20 and ive been livin at home ever since i got back from the air force.  the problem is i need a house of my own because my dog really needs a fenced back yard, and we dont have one.  thats not the only reason, but i really do feel bad about keeping him in the house all the time.  he needs to be able to run and play and all that.

let me back up a little bit.  i have an older sister who is 26, and my parents are still married to each other.  im extremely grateful for my family, i know i have it really good and better than most people.  but i try to be humble and appreciative of everything i have.  my parents help me out more than ill ever realize, and im very thankful.  sometimes i feel like i dont deserve it, but ive always done pretty much everything theyve asked, and ive never been in any real trouble.  ive always had good grades and because of that, i go to school full time on georgia's HOPE scholarship, so my parents dont pay for my school.  i work 30 hours a week too.  and even though ive been into drugs and drinking and that lifestyle, ive never been to jail and ive never let it affect my grades or work performance.  ive had a job ever since i was 14.


now, when my sister graduated high school, my parents paid for her to have her own dorm room at UGA for a year, then paid her rent at a nice apartment (and got brand new furniture)for the next 3 years for her to finish school, after she lost her scholarship, so they paid for her school too.  she never had a job in athens.  after she was done with school, she moved back on this side of town and they bought her a condo that was 100K+ and furnished that.  they paid the mortgage until she got on her feet and could pay it, and now she's very well off on her own.  she's actually getting married this saturday, and her and her fiance have been looking at 400K+ houses.  she moved in with him a few years back and we sold the condo and paid off the mrotgage.  we actually made a little money in the process. 

so anyways, they're paying god knows what for this wedding, and after that she'll be off my parents' dollar forever.  she already makes a lot more than my either of my parents do as it is.  and ive been very patient this whole time.  i havent complained, bitched, or moaned about living at home, and ive been here 2 years longer than she ever was. 

i almost feel guilty even asking my parents for anything more than they've given me up to this point.  almost all of my friends' parents are divorced, and none of them have the stability at home that i do.  it makes me feel guilty or greedy to want more, because most people dont have what i already do.  but the thing is, i know they can do this stuff for me without a sweat.  they both came from dirt poor families and worked hard their entire lives for everything we have.  theyre smart as hell with their money, and even though i wouldn't call us rich, we're comfortable.  upper middle class.

but it seems liken everytime i try to bring something up to them about moving out, they're completely negative.  ive got a few competent buddies that arent bad guys and my parents know that are ready to rent a room if i get a house to help cover the payments.  im going to help payments too.  im not looking for a ultra big sweet ass house either, just something near my school with a fence and a yard. 

ive been trying so fucking hard to please them for so long, and it seems like they just wont let me go.  and i know its not about the money.  my mom has had several promotions and makes waaaay more than she used to, and so has my dad.  our house is paid off, i know they dont have any huge debts because they manage their money so well.  they do help me out, but i work for most of my own money. 

soooo... does anyone have any advice on how to approach them?  im not trying to be a greedy, ungrateful asshole, but its really hard to bite your tongue about this kind of stuff.  ive been waiting my turn for twenty years, and just when it looks like its finally come, they just shut everything down i try to say.  i just cant figure out what to do to please them.  and now ive written way too much and im all depressed and pissed off.  fuck :sad:

but see, this is what im talking about.  that situation frustrates me so much because there is nothing more that i want than to move out.  but i know i shouldnt be angry, i should just be grateful for what i have.  its just really hard because its right there in my face all the damn time.  im confused. :confused:


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Offlinezappa
please excusethe filth, yourmom was justhere
Female User Gallery

Registered: 02/23/06
Posts: 256
Loc: motor city madness
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
Re: dilemma [Re: PurpleKush]
    #5620194 - 05/12/06 05:19 AM (17 years, 8 months ago)

hmmm... this is kinda like my sit. i want to go to college in atlanta, but my parents are trying everything to stop it from happening. they just cant take the fact that im grown up and am ready to go out. my brother has overstayed his welcome for a long,long time, but they never want me to go.

my parents are very shitty, tho. they hate my guts, but "cant ever let me go, because im their sweet little baby girl", and it really sucks.

ive thought of plans, but most of them were really stupid or cost too much money. what i plan on doing is acctually running away from home. (ok, go ahead and laugh) im just gonna get my shit together on a saturday, and slip out to the bus station while theyre at church on sunday. ill leave a note, but itll just say i moved out, not where i went. (my mom is a psychotic control freak. shed come to georgia and look in every house, car, and store for days on end, just to see where im at and bring me back.- it happened before. im moved in with a friend on the other side of town before)


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