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InvisibleSimisu
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Registered: 08/08/03
Posts: 5,435
Loc: Israeli in Flag
Natural being
    #5561824 - 04/27/06 07:02 AM (17 years, 9 months ago)

finely i had a chance to trip with nothing to worry about except my self and that proved to be just fine (probably because of the low dose but a very effective one I'd say)

i decided to take a small dose on my own (about 13.00 gram wet)
as i was coming up i started feeling a little disoriented in a way... but a good way...
i then went for a walk and took my didgereedo along to play some (and listening to music on my Iriver) i played for a while until i felt the urge to walk around by then i had minor visual distortions and a strong sense of calmness and being "right" like everything is how it's supposed to be (I've been very "depressed" lately and this sense or mind set is something i rarely get to experience) when i started walking i went through this ally and stopped dead when i saw the rocks forming the wall... it was just like in a dream
the visual distortion was something i could control if i concentrated on it otherwise my vision was more focused on a specific spot and different from usual but nothing was morphing or breathing (i did see a little of that later but this trip was just a little taste of the power of mushrooms)

i was HIGHLY aware of my body the whole trip... my mind was rather quite and it felt like any voice that was going through it was not my own... was not necessary... I was a strong steady, calm being behind all those thoughts/actions...
my body acted on it's own and it was like watching my self from the outside a little
there was also a sense of deja-vu which kinda bothered me because i can never figure it out

when i finely got back home (about an hour and a half or a little more since i ate the mushrooms) i kinda wished i took a higher dose (having full trust of my experience and self) so i decided to try some no2 which was interesting but not anywhere near it's full potential (its not that i lost track of time... i actually guessed the hour by five minuets off. but it was like time was irrelevant to anything! things just happened and i let them...)

i started stretching my body and i found just how locked it felt... I'm used to moving like a damn robot and this was a welcomed change
i went into the kitchen to get something to eat and when i saw this ceramic soup dispenser which was marked "liquid soap" i started laughing (i haven't felt that good for a long time! i let that feeling take over me and enjoyed it without looking for a reason) i had to turn that damn thing around though... I'm not sure why but it seemed SO stupid that I'd noticed it... i then noticed something else on a choco bottle next to it and decided not to think about these things anymore (it felt like a waste of energy or something... an unnecessary voice in my head)

i ate some mashed potatoes and strawberrys which was weird... it felt too real?
everything was like a new experience

when i got back into my room i looked at my self in the mirror (FUCKING AMAZING!!!) my pupils were dielated and i could see my own reflection within them... i thought about my consciousness being somewhere in the middle of that the texture of my skin and face was sharp and i could feel/see the connection between every emotion and every twitch on my face... a smile... a question... a smirk...

i was pretty tired by then and my body cried for sleep (even though my mind felt very sharp and alert) so i went to bed and instantly i felt like i was already asleep... i didn't exactly see anything but my thoughts were vivid and nothing made much sense it was just a jumble of words/sounds and fleeting scenes.
my body was easy to "forget" about and at some point i felt a distinct separation between my physical self and my mental body (to the extent that i could move my mental body without moving my physical one)

i spent a while in bed before i finely fell asleep.
again... i kinda wished i took a higher dose because all these things felt like a taste rather then the real deal (not that i didn't enjoy it or anything... it's just that at times i could see the jump to then next level but could not take it?)
i was also very worried that it might fuck with me too much (i was afraid of flipping out because i don't feel so sane lately) but since it was a low dose i had no trouble at all and infect I'm pretty much convinced I'll have no problem with higher doses as well

next time though I'm definitely gonna want to do it with someone around! i constantly felt an urge to communicate what i was thinking and feeling and i was pretty lonely in a way...
of course physical touch would have been amazing too (i need a masauge (SP?)

thanks shroomery  :thumbup: for teaching me how to grow my mushrooms and how to be safe about all this! i knew i wanted to trip for about two years now and finely i have
it seems like the start of a wonderful relationship and i just hope I'm not gonna over do it or loose respect...
:mushroom2:


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