|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
The True Story of a Bachelor
#5473587 - 04/03/06 05:10 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
WTF did I do?
I havent had sex in so long. It's not believable, and very unbearable. Tonight, I broke down, and went to craigslist.
what have I done.
I went threw all that was there, and ended up with the worst.
I knew it would be bad, but in a stupor of horniness which has been building up for the last what, two years, i went along and met up with this, thing.
It was nasty. WTF drove me there. What was i thinking?
Suicide never sounded so good.
I went in, it was dark, I could see that it was hideous, but blinded by my hollow void of a need for release, I went in.
Parts of its body, if you could call it that, was not necesarily, normal. it was, something else. that, thing, had the voice not feminine. a body even less.
The whole house smelt like a cheap spray of watermelon bubble bath had been splashed over the whole house.
Now my clothes smell like cheap watermelon bubblebath.
We went at it, I fucked this, thing. I was rough, but so was it. I even put my fingers in its mouth.... what was i thinking.
I had no real atraction what so ever, but I needed to release. Urges too strong.
I man handled that beast of a creature till my muscles became sore. I released. It was the longest release I've ever had. The longest release, with the most hideous of creatures I have ever witnessed...
A crackhore would have been more beautiful.
With my raging lust finally gone, realization of what I had done covered me like a desert sand storm. But I could see, the fog had lifted.
Suicide never sounded so good.
I was nice, I was kind. Not rude. I said my farewells and ran out of there, hoping a truck would run me over. But that truck never came.
Home I flew, and into the shower I dove. Washing my body with dial antibacterial soap from head to toe, trying to rinse off the filth of the, thing.
A condom was used, but I still fear the STDs.
Nightmares i will have tonight. I know it. And for many nights to come. I can still smell the watermelon. It has attached itself to the clothes I wore, which are now in the dirty hamper. The lurking memory will haunt me for many lives to come.
The lack of atraction allowed me to be more controlling of the tempo and other "sexual" controls, and with that control and lack of atraction, I lasted pretty long.... normally lasting long would be a good thing. But this was purely torture.
How could this have been prevented?? How can I stop something like this from happening again? I think, I need a girlfriend. I need to call that japanese girl that I've been thinking about calling, and finally fuckin call her.
A normal relationship, with some sexual release when needed, will stop these insane build-ups. Or so I hope. A normal relationship. Thats what I need. Just a regular normal relationship.
This is not the first skeleton in my closet, it is the worst, but I fear it will not be the last.
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
zee_werp
a fractalcreature


Registered: 03/24/03
Posts: 1,026
Loc: Aotearoa
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5473612 - 04/03/06 05:44 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Sorry dude, but LOL! That was a pretty good story.
It sucks that you fucked a beastish thing, but I don't feel that sorry for you cause you did it all yourself. And I'm actually kinda happy cause that was the best post I've read for a long time.
I can relate to you though (except for the fucking of the beast). I was without a gf or sex for over 2 years at one stage after I broke up with my first serious gf. For the first year I just didn't feel like seeing anyone at all and I backed off from chicks hitting on me. The second year I just couldn't really be assed trying to chase down chicks cause I was having a good time with other stuff. But there was certainly lonelyness. And the primal needs for female contact. Then I just built up the balls to hit on this girl I'd been hanging out with, cause I had forgotten how to hit on chicks it had been so long. Then we got together, it was easy as.
Just fucking do it man, hit on this chick, but do it cause you like her not cause you just want to fuck her. Not like the beast. I hope you don't get too traumatised by that.
|
Jalruza
Boot Lover


Registered: 10/09/04
Posts: 1,985
Last seen: 15 years, 7 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: zee_werp]
#5473699 - 04/03/06 06:36 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
OMG
-------------------- Time keeps ticking and running away And It's taking us fast to a brand new free dimension Too cool to mention well that's the intention But some of us too dame blind to see Jesus is the King Volume I Jesus is the King Volume II Shroomery MSN club I'm talking to aliens! Volcano Vap and Brain Chakras Hilary Duff!!
|
goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5473721 - 04/03/06 06:58 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
you busted a nut, right?
call it a good days work and move on....
just think....you are a story she will tell now....(hopefully not in the same manner as yours)
|
Scott Bennett
Lucrative


Registered: 08/05/03
Posts: 17,730
Loc: Toronto
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor *DELETED* [Re: eligal]
#5473768 - 04/03/06 07:35 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Post deleted by ThaiLipaYaiReason for deletion: Cleaning House For Paranoia!
--------------------
It's just some nights, you really want to go out, get some hot bitch to dump Goose down your throat and snort coke off a stripper's tits.
|
Scott Bennett
Lucrative


Registered: 08/05/03
Posts: 17,730
Loc: Toronto
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor *DELETED* [Re: Scott Bennett]
#5473770 - 04/03/06 07:36 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Post deleted by ThaiLipaYaiReason for deletion: Cleaning House For Paranoia!
--------------------
It's just some nights, you really want to go out, get some hot bitch to dump Goose down your throat and snort coke off a stripper's tits.
|
zee_werp
a fractalcreature


Registered: 03/24/03
Posts: 1,026
Loc: Aotearoa
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Scott Bennett]
#5475871 - 04/03/06 06:16 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
I'm surprised this didn't get more of a response (so far)
|
ClammyJoe
Azurescen Head



Registered: 11/03/05
Posts: 3,691
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 11 years, 1 month
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5475899 - 04/03/06 06:23 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Yeah, boooooyyyyy
|
Animals
Just Danson inthe Dark


Registered: 10/27/05
Posts: 1,260
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: ClammyJoe]
#5475928 - 04/03/06 06:30 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
What a great story!
|
gotcha420haha
Not Available


Registered: 12/21/05
Posts: 1,217
Loc: In the woods
Last seen: 13 years, 8 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Animals]
#5475950 - 04/03/06 06:34 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA....... check back in a week let us know if your weiner fell off...... but yeah, in all seriousness... it happens.... just find a new girl and block this memory.... hahahaha THE BEAST
--------------------
"Sometimes I wonder, If I know where I am going. I go for a walk and it seems like I have been walking for years and years and I don't know where I'm going. I hear the sound leading me on."
|
RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5475964 - 04/03/06 06:36 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
We went at it, I fucked this, thing. I was rough, but so was it. I even put my fingers in its mouth.... what was i thinking.
Lucky.
|
DoctorJ


Registered: 06/30/03
Posts: 8,846
Loc: space
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5476035 - 04/03/06 06:50 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|

classic
|
sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5476052 - 04/03/06 06:53 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
WOW eligal.....
Dude, just talk to chicks, just chat. IME if your choppin it up with a chick, and they are interested in you, they send little signals telling you.
When i get these signals ill make a move.
but damn dude. Really? Craigslist? Dude there are girls out there that will just fuck you without much effort on your part.
Just talk to chicks, thats all you have to do.
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5495155 - 04/09/06 12:03 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
thats it. ive been permanently traumatized....
tonight i decided that the only way to forget about this horrible incident was to go back to craigslist and find a normal girl. something that i could be certain that it was a girl (thinking back on it, im having difficulty being certain of its gender! now thats scary!). well, i got a reply from someone. who sounded kind of shady for some reason, and being very specific about what i wanted. then asked how much. now, on craigslist i guess it could just be a prostitute. but then again, it could be the cops...
so i confronted the email with a response asking whether that was the police or not, and they responded with this pic:

:woa: (is it a cop or a fag?) either way it creeps me the fuck out!!! damn craigslist!! wtf!

and if it were jus a fag, why would he give himself off as a girl?! was he gonna rape me?!
anyhow, i then confronted this email with his:
answer the question, are you or are you not the police? because by asking how much im asuming you're asking how much gfe, since i have not mentioned anythign about money. if you are trying to hint at money or any other form of financial aid then you are putting that idea into my head (which would be entrapment and would make me not guilty of any crime).
well, he has replied with:
Sorry, I am not the police Why are u so worried?
and after no response he continues:
What can i do to prove it?
and more emails he sends. till even now!
im so scared... what do i do?? i think ill email him back asking why he is passing himself off as a girl. that nasty mofo. so far ive gotten a total of 12 emails from this guy... he just wont go away!
(could it just miss read the post and thought i was a prostitute?) either way. im not afriad of the craigslist people.....
why does this shit always happen to me... i once met up with a myspace chick, whos pics were way outdated. but i kept my cool and got out without being touched by the fatty. 
i need to learn to dance
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5495206 - 04/09/06 12:25 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Hahahah, you had sex with a man. Just kidding. 
Crazy story.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
|
HELLA_TIGHT
Madge the Smoking Vag


Registered: 08/19/03
Posts: 84,387
Loc: Afghanistan
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5495243 - 04/09/06 12:36 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
What was wrong with her? Fat bitch or what?
--------------------
|
HELLA_TIGHT
Madge the Smoking Vag


Registered: 08/19/03
Posts: 84,387
Loc: Afghanistan
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
#5495244 - 04/09/06 12:36 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Amputee maybe?
--------------------
|
Cherk
Fashionable


Registered: 10/25/02
Posts: 46,493
Loc: International
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5495295 - 04/09/06 12:53 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
--------------------
I have considered such matters. SIKE
|
downforpot
Stranger

Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 5,715
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Cherk]
#5495331 - 04/09/06 01:05 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Yea... My friend made out with a really ugly chick at a party while he was drunk off his ass. He really regreted it, lol.
--------------------
http://www.myspace.com/4th25 "And I don't care if he was handcuffed Then shot in his head All I know is dead bodies Can't fuck with me again"
|
hIgHdRoLoVeR
delete this user

Registered: 03/25/06
Posts: 203
Last seen: 16 years, 3 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5495334 - 04/09/06 01:06 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
i find that a picture is worth a thousand words... next time just use this.
-------------------- hIgHdRoLoVeR Loving all things hydro since 1989. http://www.gardenscure.com/420/index.php the place to go for (medical) marijuana cultivation advice World of Warcrack...My anti-job!
|
Toddo
Stranger


Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 4,152
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5495368 - 04/09/06 01:20 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
dear god man.. get ahold of yourself. I felt dirty just from reading about "the beast"
|
sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Toddo]
#5495477 - 04/09/06 02:18 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
stay off of craigslist dude.
no hot chicks are going to be on there looking for cock. Hot chicks have to beat the cock off with a stick on a daily basis.
Im just gonna quote my earlier post. 
Quote:
suimush said: WOW eligal.....
Dude, just talk to chicks, just chat. IME if your choppin it up with a chick, and they are interested in you, they send little signals telling you.
When i get these signals ill make a move.
but damn dude. Really? Craigslist? Dude there are girls out there that will just fuck you without much effort on your part.
Just talk to chicks, thats all you have to do.
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
|
DieCommie

Registered: 12/11/03
Posts: 29,258
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: sui]
#5495485 - 04/09/06 02:24 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
wtf is craigslist? Is it a place to find hookers or just regular sluts on the net?
|
sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: DieCommie]
#5495492 - 04/09/06 02:29 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
Edited by sui (04/09/06 02:31 AM)
|
DieCommie

Registered: 12/11/03
Posts: 29,258
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: sui]
#5495493 - 04/09/06 02:30 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
hmmmm, thank god i have a wife
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496032 - 04/09/06 09:31 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
first off, to answer some questions and make comments:
mckennadmt, youre just kidding, but thats what im actually afraid of!!
shroomintoxicate, if only it had had tits...
Hella, fat, wierd body contores. almost deformed. and well ugly to the point of uncertanty of gender....
hlghdrolover, it sure is!! haha
todo, you feel dirty from reading it. imagine how dirty i feel from living it.
suimush, yea, im never going there again!! trust me on that! but i had to go one last time. for memories sake. for a chance at sanity.
on to the continuation:
oh god. what a wierd adventure. im back!! at 7:30am... well, after i made my last post, the guy all of a sudden stopped emailing (thank god!), and then i got an email from some girl i had emailed back on the first night with "it". well she seemed nice, but also turned out to be a prostitute..... -_- dammit. haha. but desperate to somehoe erase or write over the memory of "it" i decided that my mental sanity was more valuable than some green paper from my wallet. so i went ahead.
this girl i saw in her pics (which were acurate) that she was a little plump (not huge or anything) with dark hair and fair skin. so i head on over to these unbelievably nice apartments, real luxury apartments. i park, call, shes still gettin ready. so when shes ready she calls me and i go up. she gave me one turn wrong leading me to her neighbors... i rang their doorbell but luckily noone seemed to be home. so i get the right apartment, go in, and its dark as hell. my heart starts to race as it reminds me of the last encounter. "oh no!!" im thinking. "have i once again fallen into the pit of filth which i loath so much?!"
she walks me into her room, and as the light from the room starts to shine on her i see....
a person! a female!! woot!!
haha, she was like in her pics, a little plump, but not a tub of lard. she had her black hair and white skin, and looked much much younger (she said she was 30, but i thought she was 22 or 24 or something...) and looked rather goth. just a tad. and as we step into her bedroom, what do i see, but a nice big bed full of soft pillows and a thick fury blanket. everything is black or dark read, and is very goth (incase you havent noticed, i really have a thing for goth chicks...). so i sit down on the bed and she sits on the stool infront of me and the pc, and we talk very normal for a bit. school, work, music, friends, etc. jsut normal chit chat. shes really nice and funny and has a cute voice with this great young feminine high pitch typa cute laugh. hard to describe. anyhow, she lays down on the bed and we talk some more, after like, half hour she gives me a back massage, still talkin. then somehow we get to cuddling and listening to music (shes got some good rock/metal), and still talkin. by now i honestly forgot she was a prostitute. i actually thought i was goin out with her somehow... well cuddling starts getting touch, and eventually im rubbing her. and rubbing. and rubbing. i rubbed her alot... hehe. and finally she has an orgasm. we slow down, still cuddingly. i give her a moment to cool down, and then i go at it again. this time the moans got stronger faster than the last time, yet not too loud. all the while she is kissing me and licking my neck (wow, ive had my neck licked before, but her tongue was so soft. oh man, it gave me a total high. i swear, better than any drug!) i then went down and did the tongue thing until i couldnt move my tongue anymore... hehe. but by now she is about to come again, im tryin to move this dead stiff tongue, but i cant, so i jsut use my neck... and eventually that gets tired. and right at the climax she throws here hands down there and finishes herself off with me locked between her legs. talk about front row view.
we roll over back to norma laying, this time with more space as the room seemed to be about to catch on fire from the heat. she then goes to the bathroom, does her hair or what ever, and as im laying there, i notice that the sun is up... -_- she comes back acting all cute and lovy dovy, and starts cuddling me and rubbing me etc.
now, guys, how many of you have hard a girl suck n lick our nipples. and i dont mean some girlfriend who wants you to smile and taps it with her tongue one or two times. im talking, makin oral love to your nipples. like the neck, ive been licked there, but nothing like this girl could do. wow.
so she then moves down, slowly workin her way to, the cannon. she kisses and licks all around it. an then puts it in her mouth and, i swear, the tings she did with her tongue i have never even dreamed were physically possible. the sensations i got were unbelievable. i had to really concentrate not to bust right away! but i managed. she then began to deepthroat. she went till her nose hit my pubic bone, and then proceeded to squeeze and release with her throat. it was extacy. she did that for a while, goin back and forth from her tongue thing and her throat thing. eventually i could not take it any more and exploded. in her mouth (with warnings). she took it and swallowed all. 
we aly there, her under my arm, cuddling up to my body. she was already passing out (with a smile on her face ) and im nto too far behind. after a while i decide i should go home before im too tired to drive. so i say good by and she walks me to the door. i drive home, content. i walk up to my bedroom, about to pass out, when i get a text message from the girl.
we both forgot that i was supposed to pay...
damn. i feel horrible (but then again i spent quite abit goin down on her...). any how, a few text mesages later she says how nice i was etc. but she says she needed the money by noon... so she is gonan stay up and find someone else online to get the money by then. so i tell her that im on my way over then, and she replies with, "no. go to bed.. seriously.. its akward i cant even look u in the eye.."
what the hell does that mean?
so i asked why she cant look at me.
and her response is, "Cus i feel stupid.. N this is al wierd.. N umm yer so nice.. U dont need to be havin this conversation.. Go 2 bed.. Im sure i wil get it in time.. I have 4 hours."
damn....
so thats the story so far. i am now gonna ignore her last two text messages n head on over to pay.... (i feel so wierd payin for sex especially when i also got her off and spent much more time on it...). but that was the agreement... so off i go.  if im not back in half hour (9am...), i crashed from falling asleep at the wheel (not like its the first time, last time i feel asleep in the motorcycle... but thats another story).
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
ShroomFan
nn dmt

Registered: 03/12/04
Posts: 866
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496114 - 04/09/06 10:19 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
u slut
-------------------- Fellow Shroomerites, if you Love expressing yourself with a dope tee shirt feast your 3rd eye on www.facebook.com/vicereversa ∞ Conscious Clothing for Conscious Minds ∞ Wear a tee , open a mind Each shirt is spawned to Arouse Awareness <> We believe in Sustainability & Giving back <> Do you know of a community project or persons in need you feel deserves attention? - Tell us on our page And we just might pick the story > develop a tee > and donate the proceeds to that cause. ∞♥∞ Unget it, VICE REVERSA
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496126 - 04/09/06 10:25 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
and im back, alive, and didnt get arrested for driving with a revoked drivers license  she took like half of what we had orignially agreed on. so thats kul.
i can now go to bed, with a clear head.
the thing is forgotten, it has been covered with a new memory. im sure once it a while it will come back to haunt me. but not on a dialy hourly basis as it has ben doin lately. also i didnt steal anything or cheat anyone. i helped a girl pay rent or whatever, and made a good night for both out of it as well (im still thinkin about her cute face when she was havin the O, she was cute).
i think tonight was a good night. and now, i go to bed. sweet dreams all.
nighty!
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: ShroomFan]
#5496128 - 04/09/06 10:26 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
ShroomFan said: u slut
haha, that i am!
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
TODAY
Battletoad


Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496158 - 04/09/06 10:39 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
great stories eligal.
--------------------
ca'rouse (k-rouz) intr.v. To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.
|
gotcha420haha
Not Available


Registered: 12/21/05
Posts: 1,217
Loc: In the woods
Last seen: 13 years, 8 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496166 - 04/09/06 10:44 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
dude... you ate out a hooker?... thats on my "things not to do" list.... but otherwise it sounds like you had fun and... it wasnt THE BEAST... hahahaha
--------------------
"Sometimes I wonder, If I know where I am going. I go for a walk and it seems like I have been walking for years and years and I don't know where I'm going. I hear the sound leading me on."
|
HELLA_TIGHT
Madge the Smoking Vag


Registered: 08/19/03
Posts: 84,387
Loc: Afghanistan
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496575 - 04/09/06 01:21 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
hahaha
You make pawpaw proud!
--------------------
|
blacksabbathrulz

Registered: 05/22/02
Posts: 2,511
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
#5496802 - 04/09/06 02:40 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Dude you went down on a prostitute? Bad idea.
-------------------- .
|
Ginseng1
Elegant Universe


Registered: 09/02/04
Posts: 3,310
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5496887 - 04/09/06 03:08 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Bro... i would love to see a fuckin movie on your twisted life... thats some good entertainment rite there.
Yea, sorry about that beast shit sounds spooky
-------------------- Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...
|
drtyfrnk
PresidentialCandidate 2008



Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 2,961
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Last seen: 14 years, 3 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Ginseng1]
#5496938 - 04/09/06 03:24 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
I nominate this Best Pub Thread for today 
Glad you got rid of the beast's sexual encounter out of your mind.
-------------------- It's Krang, Bitch!
|
aNeway2sayHooray
Cresley Wusher



Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,653
Loc: Orphic Trench
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: drtyfrnk]
#5497193 - 04/09/06 05:01 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
We need pictures of both the beast and the goth girl.
Why didnt you fuck her?You paid for oral sex.But no fucky fucky.You should have atleast put it in her ass.Get the most for your money.
Go to the store and purchase some listerine.
I also havnt been laid in a long time.But paying a woman so I can eat her out is somthing I cant see my self doing.
But who knows.I assume you had been drinking.
-------------------- Mad_Larkin said: Death is just a thang.
MrJellineck said: Profits, prophets. That's all you jews think about. sheekle said: life is drugs... and music... and cat...
|
RuNE
bomberman


Registered: 09/23/00
Posts: 2,331
Loc: tartarus
Last seen: 7 years, 11 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5497223 - 04/09/06 05:17 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Your slut grew feelings for ya! 
Dawwww.
Ring her up again dude, looks like you might be able to hit it without paying. Might as well have a 'girlfriend' until you can get a girlfriend!
Great stories.
-------------------- ~Happy sailing~
|
Animals
Just Danson inthe Dark


Registered: 10/27/05
Posts: 1,260
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: RuNE]
#5497227 - 04/09/06 05:19 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Dude, ate out a prostitute?! Do you know how many dicks have been in there? Probably millions. There was probably like 3 or 4 in there 20 minutes before you got there.
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: RuNE]
#5497693 - 04/09/06 07:42 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
RuNE said: looks like you might be able to hit it without paying.
thats pretty much how it seems. i think she really likes me. when i went back to give her the money at first she denied to let me pay...
and about the eating out thing. yea, that was probably the wrong thing to do. i have no idea how it got to that... but from the way she explained things shes not some full time hooker or what ever. she does notary or whatever and sometimes she is a little low when it comes time to pay rent. so once in a while she goes on criagslist and finds someone to pay whats left over of the rent. could just be a lie though
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5497697 - 04/09/06 07:44 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
oh, thought yall might be interested to know, she does shrooms whenever she can get ahold of them i might have found a trip buddy... or atleast someone to get some from without growing my own.
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5497738 - 04/09/06 07:53 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
eligal said: oh, thought yall might be interested to know, she does shrooms whenever she can get ahold of them i might have found a trip buddy... or atleast someone to get some from without growing my own.
Oh, then you're okay!!!
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
|
gotcha420haha
Not Available


Registered: 12/21/05
Posts: 1,217
Loc: In the woods
Last seen: 13 years, 8 months
|
|
so... from eating out a hooker, to tripping with one..? im no doctor, but arent you supposed to trip with people that you really trust and are comfortable with?... thats just me
--------------------
"Sometimes I wonder, If I know where I am going. I go for a walk and it seems like I have been walking for years and years and I don't know where I'm going. I hear the sound leading me on."
|
RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: gotcha420haha]
#5497997 - 04/09/06 08:53 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
The real question is will he have to pay for her time while she trips with him.
|
sui
I love you.


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,853
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5498011 - 04/09/06 08:57 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
RandalFlagg said: The real question is will he have to pay for her time while she trips with him.
-------------------- "There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
|
HELLA_TIGHT
Madge the Smoking Vag


Registered: 08/19/03
Posts: 84,387
Loc: Afghanistan
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: sui]
#5498066 - 04/09/06 09:12 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
That'd be a good way to come off a trip
"So, that'll be 100 dollars"
--------------------
|
blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Jalruza]
#5498132 - 04/09/06 09:32 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
--------------------
|
eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5498173 - 04/09/06 09:47 PM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
RandalFlagg said: The real question is will he have to pay for her time while she trips with him.
definately not...
if anything, i could get her trippin balls then pimp her out
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
|
Dobie
Dopeless Hopefiend

Registered: 08/15/02
Posts: 52,841
Loc: ON DA BLOCK
Last seen: 5 months, 30 days
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5498729 - 04/10/06 01:30 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
how much did ya pay? just wondering im bored and got some cash lol
-------------------- This place is gayer than when the balls touch
|
theuser
DON'T LOOK

Registered: 08/04/05
Posts: 5,859
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5498740 - 04/10/06 01:38 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Wonderful read! I got shivers 1/2 way through.
Could you describe the beast woman? I am dying of curiosity.
(edit)
I read through the thread. I'm glad you found a woman you like. Another thing I need to know is how much did the latest chick cost? Man you are in a weird situation, sexy too!
--------------------
Edited by theolduser (04/10/06 01:44 AM)
|
Toddo
Stranger


Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 4,152
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: theuser]
#5498747 - 04/10/06 01:49 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
thats just cruel... don't make him recall "It"
|
theuser
DON'T LOOK

Registered: 08/04/05
Posts: 5,859
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: Toddo]
#5498750 - 04/10/06 01:52 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Toddo said: thats just cruel... don't make him recall "It"
Okay, okay, but what about costs? I was looking at the list in my area and noticed a lot of attractive women, surprising!

Oh and I think tripping w/ her could be a very bad idea.
--------------------
|
fresh313
journeyman


Registered: 09/01/03
Posts: 2,537
Last seen: 12 years, 9 months
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5498787 - 04/10/06 03:03 AM (17 years, 9 months ago) |
|
|
pr0n is your friend
|
Microcosmatrix
Spiral staircasetechnician


Registered: 10/20/05
Posts: 11,293
Loc: Ythan's house
Last seen: 17 years, 1 month
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5688533 - 05/29/06 09:20 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Christ man
|
RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
|
Re: The True Story of a Bachelor [Re: eligal]
#5688545 - 05/29/06 09:23 PM (17 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
eligal said: We went at it, I fucked this, thing. I was rough, but so was it. I even put my fingers in its mouth.... what was i thinking.
Was her name Jennifer? She sounds like one of my ex-girlfriends.
|
|