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OfflinePurpleKush
Rational Lunatic
Male User Gallery

Registered: 03/20/06
Posts: 3,421
Loc: Above The Law
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
poem
    #5471000 - 04/02/06 02:57 PM (17 years, 9 months ago)

im just looking for a little criticism, i wrote this today.



forgotten son


left alone locked away

watch the shadows shift all day

try to catch a glimpse of sun

im all alone, a forgotten son

the locks are on the other side

they put me here because i cried

i crawl back down inside myself

put my mind up on a shelf

maybe if i hide away

theyll let me out another day

left alone locked away

i hide inside myself these days

a broken man no longer cries

just waiting for my time to die

ill jump across the great divide

again alone on the other side

an eternity of solitary

makes the crowds large and scary

cursed to live my life alone

no one can hear my screams and moans

and if they can, i wouldnt know

im locked away. all alone.


--------------------

:blindfury::fried::psychsplit::vaped:


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OfflineRambel
Stranger

Registered: 07/09/05
Posts: 128
Last seen: 16 years, 9 months
Re: poem [Re: PurpleKush]
    #5473937 - 04/03/06 09:27 AM (17 years, 9 months ago)

I dig it man. It's heavy eh! Heavy poem for a heavy heart... I am glad I got to read it.


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Offlinej_db69
Forever learning shaman
 User Gallery

Registered: 02/09/04
Posts: 897
Last seen: 1 year, 7 months
Re: poem [Re: Rambel]
    #5581436 - 05/02/06 01:11 PM (17 years, 8 months ago)

great write man


--------------------
One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the dark conscious.
--Jung


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