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InvisibleRickster
El Conquistador
Male User Gallery

Registered: 02/06/06
Posts: 659
Loc: Babylon
What is this? (I know wrong forum)
    #5469219 - 04/01/06 09:29 PM (17 years, 9 months ago)

What is this all about?

http://cgi.ebay.com/Shroomery-org-domain...1QQcmdZViewItem

Q: Is it possible to pack up and ship the whole operation, servers,administrators to iraq? 
Apr-01-06
  A: My Islamic brother of the faith, we offer worldwide shipping and it would be an honor to house our servers in this hallowed and holy land. Although we cannot export staff members for legal reasons, we would be glad to work with your government to ensure all necessary permits are acquired and our property is transferred safely to your ownership. Please note however, we accept payment only in US dollars not dinar.
 


  Q: Are ye not afeared of incurring the wrath of the Almighty Creator? Are ye not aware of the passage which cleanses ALL meat for man's consumption, yea even unto the meat of the lowly fungi? Yea the are too soon converted to be interpreting scripture lest ye realize the folly of thine endeavor. Dost thou take American Express?
Apr-01-06
  A: Although today we may use the word 'meat' colloquially to refer to the body of a mushroom, this was not always so. Most notably, in ancient Hebrew there was a clear distinction. It is only through numerous translations and reinterpretations that The Bible could be said to bless this most putrid of all creatures, the mushroom. It is with the greatest humility in my heart that I beg our Lord Almighty for forgiveness if I misinterpret His word. I am still an empty pitcher, just starting to be filled. But I have prayed about this and asked for guidance, and I know in my heart that I am doing what is right. And God has also instructed me that it is right to accept all major credit cards, to allow for convenient financing.
 


  Q: Correct me if im wrong but if I win I can make a bible study forum right?
Apr-01-06
  A: My dearest brother, I am thrilled you would ask such a question. Indeed, I myself considered such an option before realizing that it was little more than an attempt to bargain with God. But your path may be different brother, in fact I know it is! The Almighty has given us both a chance to prove our devotion. Me, by repenting, and renouncing my association with the Shroomery. You, by exceeding the maximum bid, and ushering in a new age of morality and piety on the site. God be with you my brother, as the price is climbing fast, but you know what must be done.
 


  Q: Are you farging for real? Is this Ythan and co or is this some bullshit april fools joke?
Apr-01-06
  A: My friend, I can understand your skepticism but do please watch your language. April Fool's day began with the introduction of the Gregorian Calendar, when 'fools' were unaware of the change in date. The symbolic meaning couldn't be more clear. The Gregorian Calendar, centered on the birth of Our Savior, represents a holy trinity. Religion, science and art. Birth, death, and resurrection. Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. To make light of this sacred symbol is to defile it, and I will take no part in such vulgar actions. This auction is legitimate, all the administrators who matter are on board and there is no reason to assume it will not proceed to its conclusion.
 


  Q: Will you allow for current users to be removed from the mysql/deleted from the history before the transfer is done? Of course, it depends on who buys the domain, but I think this option should be presented to all current members...
Apr-01-06
  A: Although I can understand your concern about personal information falling into the wrong hands, it would be disingenuous for us to provide the site's new owners with anything less than all the tools they need for success. Our extensive records are a compelling bonus for this auction, and for some individuals they might even be the primary reason for bidding. Allowing our users to erase their history before the site changes hands would be akin to selling a rotten apple, and I'm afraid we are unable to do so.
 


  Q: AS drug are miorally wrong, do you feel that by selling all of your users information to the proper authorites that you will redeem yourself to god?
Apr-01-06
  A: Zippoz, my friend and former coworker - you should understand more than anyone, we do not feel that drugs are morally wrong per se. This is an attempt to distance ourselves from a site about abhorrent, unnatural fungi and nothing more. If the authorities are the highest bidders, we will of course treat them like any other eBayer. However, if a private individual or business is the winner, we certainly won't be volunteering up the information!
 


  Q: Does Anno come with the site?
Apr-01-06
  A: Blink_idiot, my longtime friend and associate - I regret to inform you than Anno is not included in the purchase price. The administrators are unanimous when we renounce our past and severe all ties to this organization. However, we will be auctioning off select moderators over the coming weeks.
 


  Q: The Bible doen't mention for us to drive in automobiles or jump in rockets either so I guess they are from the devil too. And what about the mushrooms we eat on pizza, is that satan worshipping too? I respect that you want to get out of the psychedelic life. Nothing wrong with that at all. All the best to you
Apr-01-06
  A: Dearest friend, thank you for your compassion and understanding. As I see it, discussing the true meaning of the Bible in this way can only bring us closer to God. I truly believe the Good Lord blessed us with great intelligence and ingenuity for a reason. If we were not meant to drive or go to the stars, we would have been born snakes or badgers! Such progress is our destiny, and surely it must please God to see how far we have come in our 4,000 years of existence. However, the detestable mushroom is none of these things. Neither animal nor plant, it feeds on death and decay. Many are even poisonous and deadly! It's hard to imagine a more unholy thing. Truly, it is imperative that we continue to purge these abominations from the world in the service of our All-Seeing Master.
 


  Q: Why would you say such a thing, that God never intended the existence of such an unholy species. That is a false statement. Everything God created is good and for someone who owned the shroomery should now that. Everything was created by God
Apr-01-06
  A: My dear brother, it is true the Lord Our God created all life, and in His infinite perfection He would not create a species with no place in the world. However, let us look directly at God's instructions to man: The Bible. A detailed reading reveals no mention of mushrooms or indeed any life-form which reproduces by spores. The only logical conclusion is that mushrooms (and ferns) were planted by the Devil to lead man down an unholy and immoral path. This might come as a surprise, since these humble plants and fungi seem non-threatening if you are unaware of the greater picture. But my dear brother, we know that Satan stops at nothing to trick and deceive, and much like our Lord works in mysterious ways.
 


  Q: You state that you have detailed records dating back to early 2003. Could you please elaborate?
Apr-01-06
  A: We have archived our server logs since January 12, 2003 to help us track puppets, bad traders and hackers. These archives include full Apache access and error logs, firewall connection logs and mySQL query logs. You will also have access to backup copies of all e-mails and private messages which have passed through our server during this time period, and all billing records from our online store. There should be numerous ways the new owner of the Shroomery can make profitable use of this detailed information.
 


  Q: Why are you selling this site? Are there any legal problems I should be aware of?
Mar-31-06
  A: No, throughout our many years of operation the Shroomery has never been the target of any type of litigation. However, as the site's administrators began accepting Christ into our lives, we have become somewhat disillusioned with the subject matter provided by the Shroomery. In Genesis, God says specifically: 'I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds in the sky and all the creatures that move on the ground - everything that has the breath of life in it - I give every green plant for food.' Mushrooms aren't green. They bear spores, not seeds. Clearly, The Lord Our God never intended the existence of such an unholy species. It is with great shame that we look upon our history of heresy, and only by ridding ourselves of this sinful website may we hope someday to beg for God's mercy and forgiveness.


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InvisibleDNKYD
Turtle!

Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 12,326
Re: What is this? (I know wrong forum) [Re: Rickster]
    #5469247 - 04/01/06 09:37 PM (17 years, 9 months ago)

HOLY FUCK.

BRAIN.......HURTS.....THINK IT'S...... ANEURYSM........


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InvisibleRickster
El Conquistador
Male User Gallery

Registered: 02/06/06
Posts: 659
Loc: Babylon
Re: What is this? (I know wrong forum) [Re: DNKYD]
    #5469315 - 04/01/06 09:59 PM (17 years, 9 months ago)

Ha ha very funny, I really thought this place was being sold.


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OfflineMadtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
 User Gallery

Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
Loc: The Ocean of Notions
Last seen: 5 months, 23 days
Re: What is this? (I know wrong forum) [Re: Rickster]
    #5469343 - 04/01/06 10:07 PM (17 years, 9 months ago)

You and about 10 bajillion other people.


--------------------
After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus


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InvisibleDNKYD
Turtle!

Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 12,326
Re: What is this? (I know wrong forum) [Re: Rickster]
    #5469377 - 04/01/06 10:16 PM (17 years, 9 months ago)

Hey look, I think somebody wrote "gullible" on the ceiling!


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