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CaRnAgECaNdY
Tool's groupie


Registered: 04/09/04
Posts: 11,505
Loc: Billy Howerdel's closet
Last seen: 6 months, 23 days
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Through my Smiles
#5391902 - 03/12/06 01:02 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I'm in so much pain. The good part being that it's not emotional. Emotional pain is harder to deal with. Nonetheless, this pain I'm going through now is bad.
I haven't been able to work. I thought I'd be a tough girl and try and work last night. After 8 hours on my feet, I fell to the floor in my office crying in pain. Fuck, I went back to the hospital.
3 times in 5 days I've been there. They can't do much for me except numb the pain temporarily. I need an MRI. I have severe lower back pain and they tell me that I have a bulging disk. I have made a doctors appointment, but it's on the damn 17th. That seems like forever days away. My mother has been my hero throughout this ordeal. She gives great back massages that ease the pain. I have amazing employess who also try and help me out. Though now...I can't even work for awhile. Not working is what hurts me the most.
I can handle the pain for a while, I can handle being looked at as a crippled girl and get assistance all the time even when I feel to proud to accept it.
Not working though makes me feel completely useless. How does one not work? What thehell am I suppose to do.
I feel so lost and worthless right now.
I listen to my music and that lifts my spirits. Thank GOD for NOVA.
Tool helps as well. Music is more of a comfort drug to me right now then all the stuff they're feedin my body.
This isn't exactly a pity post. I just need to let some of my feelings out. I was recently told that I wasn't my normal self these days. I can't help that and I apologize to those of you who aren't used to me and this current mood I've been in.
Please bear with me and stay by my side, I need all of you right now more then ever.
I love you all and I'll return to normal once I feel normal again. I promise.
I originally posted this on MySpace since I'm a MySpace addict. I have friends here as well. I try not to complain about my health issues. Normally I don't have many.
This is a constant pain and no matter what I do...it just won't go away.
Are there any simple exercises or something that may relieve the pain a little?
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The secret to being funny is to say smart things stupidly, or is it stupid things smartly? Whatever..it's not rocket surgery...or something like that.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Sorry to hear about your physical problems. Have you ever considered getting an inversion table?
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Is it possible for you to do yoga therapy (not just a yoga class but with a trained yoga therapist more of a one on one thing?) that can really help...... or........ my tai chi instructor used to be in a wheel chair because of a back injury...... he's just fine now and has no pain.
I am not dedicated enough to the yoga/tai chi paths, but he is a living example that they work tremendously.... and you should see the crazy flexible things my yoga teacher can do.
What is of utmost importance is that you do not give in to your position but you never ever strain it or push yourself.... just keep that positive mind that you WILL heal and YOU WILL IMPROVE over time. And I'd say it would be good to look into yoga or tai chi..... they are designed not just to exercise the physical body but to stimulate the flow of vital energies.
and on to a not very useful comment: You might want to stear clear of some of Tool's material.... message to harry manback and ticks and leeches in particular.
I'm not sure what's going on with them but they do things with their music that are quite profound.... I'm just not sure if it's in the positive or negative direction.
I worry that when you say silently in your head "suck me dry" over and over again, combined with the trance like states that album puts you in... it might be opening some dangerous doors.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
Edited by leery11 (03/12/06 05:54 PM)
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confuzed
Stranger
Registered: 12/15/05
Posts: 101
Last seen: 17 years, 9 months
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Re: Through my Smiles [Re: leery11]
#5393084 - 03/12/06 07:34 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Desiree, you are working through it, your waiting to see a doctor.
I've had back problems, but mostly upper back from using the computer too much, I'm pretty sure it's because my monitor isn't elevated enough.
Anyway, I've found that I can get pretty much complete relief for about a week just by using the exercise bike for 20min a day (even if I only do it for one day), so exercise is definetly a good way out, even if it doesn't target the specific area... in my case atleast.
My mum had a bulging disc problem, it resolved completely years ago.
My advice is wait until you have a physician take a look at it and then use appropriate exercise to reverse any possible atrophy gradually. You'll get there! It'll be quick too,just a couple of painful hurdles.
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Liz
Owl Lady



Registered: 11/16/04
Posts: 6,962
Loc: Massachusetts
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I've been through basically the same thing - I have chronic backpain and I'm prescribed to all kinds of medication for it. Exercising in general will help, whether it be walking just to lose some weight (which in turn puts less pressure on your lower back) or doing some strengthening exercises. Talk to your doctor abotu physical therapy or seeing a chiropractor. Don't strain yourself and try to go to work. If you have a bulging disk, one wrong movement, or lifting something wrong can cause it to herniate, and trust me, that hurts even worse. Take it easy, relax, take some pain killers (if you have any). Hopefully your doctor will help you resolve this long term at your appointment.
Hang in there
-------------------- Remember, remember the fifth of November The gunpowder treason and plot. I see no reason why gunpowder treason Should ever be forgot.
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CaRnAgECaNdY
Tool's groupie


Registered: 04/09/04
Posts: 11,505
Loc: Billy Howerdel's closet
Last seen: 6 months, 23 days
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Re: Through my Smiles [Re: Liz]
#5396271 - 03/13/06 07:13 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Thank you all for your comments.
As far as the Tool music...I can't see it doing any harm to me in any way. Thank you though.
I am taking meds, and I'm already feeling a bit more comfortable. The yoga thing sounds great. I don't know if I could find a decent yoga instructor where I am now. I don't think I could afford something like that anyway, not with all these bills I'm going to have to pay.
I am hanging in there. Hopefully, I can go back to work on Thursday doing adminisrative stuff or just really light work.
This is so frustrating.
I've uploaded a song that I can't stop listening to. NOVA
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The secret to being funny is to say smart things stupidly, or is it stupid things smartly? Whatever..it's not rocket surgery...or something like that.
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