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Chikitta
Registered: 03/12/05
Posts: 632
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I think I hate my housemates boyfriend
#5360735 - 03/03/06 05:48 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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He spends all his time at our house eating our food and making out with his fat girlfriend in the shared parts of the house. She weighs about 13 stone and he must be going on 18 stone at least so I have to listen to their fat fucking most nights.
To make things worse, the bastard gave me (and our drummer) flu a day before our band is supposed to be playing at this battle of the bands thing.
And there's more - I just got a batch of decent rolls and have been planning on munching a couple tonight for weeks (has been over a year since my last one) but I'm stuck in my room with a headache and fever.
I need some sort of revenge. Suggestions?
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TYL3R


Registered: 11/19/04
Posts: 17,493
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Chikitta]
#5360742 - 03/03/06 05:56 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Go fuck yourself ?
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twigz
stick boy


Registered: 02/29/04
Posts: 689
Loc: From up in a tree
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: TYL3R]
#5360750 - 03/03/06 06:02 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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kick his ass 
Oh I know if he likes eating your food leave some chocolate ex-lax out for him to find. Of course you may have to put it in a diff raper. Or give him some old bad food.
-------------------- Know your Body - Know your Mind - Know your Substance - Know your Source.
Edited by twigz (03/03/06 06:06 AM)
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Chikitta]
#5360755 - 03/03/06 06:05 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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laxitive brownies
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Brakkie
Myself
Registered: 09/26/05
Posts: 813
Loc: Rotterdam... The City of ...
Last seen: 17 years, 1 month
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: goobler]
#5360955 - 03/03/06 08:56 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Put some vegies in the lower part of the fridge and put a note that states where to look for the vegies... (didn't think of that but read it somewhere... don't remember where though)
-------------------- "This combines the good sides of every other drug with none of the bad. This is the ultimate luxury, the flawless wisdom-pleasure hit. More mellow and cozy than heroin, but you don't nod out. I feel more alive and wired and energetic than with speed, but not jangly. Its got the blast of cocaine, but it lasted ten times longer." "Going to the grave without ever having a psychedelic experience is like going to the grave without ever having sex. That means you will die before even becoming an adolescent." -Terence Mckenna
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Maverick
Lover of Earwigs!



Registered: 12/18/05
Posts: 13,437
Loc: Valleys of Willamette
Last seen: 1 day, 7 hours
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Brakkie]
#5360958 - 03/03/06 08:58 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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You know, set up your amp and when they're fucking, jam it, not only will they not be able to fuck well, but you won't have to listen to it. Or you can just tell them to shut the fuck up and pound on their door.
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horha
trout


Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 292
Last seen: 17 years, 3 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Maverick]
#5360965 - 03/03/06 09:03 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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epson salt is a really Strong laxative slit him a little of that and he will shit like never before
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Chikitta
Registered: 03/12/05
Posts: 632
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Maverick]
#5360966 - 03/03/06 09:04 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I doubt they fuck well anyway - was speaking to her the other day and she said he can't go on top because he crushes her.
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: TYL3R]
#5361034 - 03/03/06 09:48 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
TYL3R said: Go fuck yourself ?

Grow up. Put on some headphones and mind your own business.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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Chikitta
Registered: 03/12/05
Posts: 632
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Hah. You have no idea.
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g00n
Goombodias


Registered: 08/19/05
Posts: 77
Loc: Sothern Cali!!!
Last seen: 16 years, 6 months
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Quote:
I doubt they fuck well anyway - was speaking to her the other day and she said he can't go on top because he crushes her.
I wish that was cool with every chick. then i could kick back and lay down while the brod does all the work... Ahhh that would be the life!!!
-------------------- I run with the hatchet and claim the PSYCHOPATHIC!!!
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DNKYD
Turtle!

Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 12,326
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Chikitta]
#5361110 - 03/03/06 10:30 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Take all the food out of all the cupboards one day while they are there and fill them with nothing but Slim Fast products.
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eric_the_red


Registered: 02/28/03
Posts: 13,742
Loc: happy land
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Chikitta]
#5361137 - 03/03/06 10:44 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Chikitta said: Suggestions?
keep the cattle in the barn.
-------------------- Anno cock? is that some kind of Greek liqueur? -Geo's All Knowing Sex Slave
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bobjones
...


Registered: 10/12/05
Posts: 999
Loc: Tx
Last seen: 8 years, 3 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Chikitta]
#5361168 - 03/03/06 11:00 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Chikitta said: Hah. You have no idea.
i have roomates from hell too, revenge won't help anything...
-------------------- "Outside of a dog a book is a man's friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read" -Groucho Marx
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coda
Banjo Goiter


Registered: 03/20/01
Posts: 8,750
Last seen: 10 months, 3 days
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: bobjones]
#5361176 - 03/03/06 11:03 AM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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tape them fucking and post it on the internet. Send them an email with a link the video.
-------------------- To get really high is to forget yourself. And to forget yourself is to see everything else. And to see everything else is to become an understanding molecule in evolution, a conscious tool of the universe. And I think every human being should be a conscious tool of the universe. . . . -JG i really am glad you came back to us instead of taking the other path. *hug* -A_S (RIP your final words to me will never be forgotten)
 Don't fuck with the laughing jesus.
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40oz


Registered: 01/18/01
Posts: 30,119
Loc: Sandy Eggo. Ca.
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Chikitta]
#5361441 - 03/03/06 12:46 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Chikitta said: He spends all his time at our house eating our food and making out with his fat girlfriend in the shared parts of the house. She weighs about 13 stone and he must be going on 18 stone at least so I have to listen to their fat fucking most nights.
To make things worse, the bastard gave me (and our drummer) flu a day before our band is supposed to be playing at this battle of the bands thing.
And there's more - I just got a batch of decent rolls and have been planning on munching a couple tonight for weeks (has been over a year since my last one) but I'm stuck in my room with a headache and fever.
I need some sort of revenge. Suggestions?
13 stone? 18 stone?
--------------------
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  tiny_rabid_birds said: "your avatar is dirty."
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: 40oz]
#5361444 - 03/03/06 12:48 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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A British measurement of mass that equals approximately fourteen pounds.
182 pounds and 252 pounds...aka, biggins.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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eris
underground


Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 48,024
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 4 months, 18 days
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They are worth their wieght in STONE eh?
-------------------- Immortal / Temporarily Retired The OG Thread Killer My mushroom hunting gallery
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40oz


Registered: 01/18/01
Posts: 30,119
Loc: Sandy Eggo. Ca.
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Quote:
McKennaDMT said: A British measurement of mass that equals approximately fourteen pounds.
182 pounds and 252 pounds...aka, biggins.
does it smell like freshly cooked bacon after they go at it?
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  tiny_rabid_birds said: "your avatar is dirty."
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goobler
Reanimated



Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
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252 aint that big unless hes 5'4"
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XUL
OTD Janitor


Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: Maverick]
#5361652 - 03/03/06 01:55 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
DRTMaverick said: You know, set up your amp and when they're fucking, jam it, not only will they not be able to fuck well, but you won't have to listen to it. Or you can just tell them to shut the fuck up and pound on their door.
yea, or just in general play your amp really loud when they are in the house. Every time the fatty comes over just play that shit super loud. then maybe he will get tired of comming over. If he tries to tell you to turn it off, tell him to fuck off because you pay for the place and you need to practice.
--------------------
TRUMP 2020
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AnarchysAvatar
Evil-MindedBreakdown


Registered: 12/22/05
Posts: 60
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: XUL]
#5361681 - 03/03/06 02:03 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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You're all thinking too small. Find out when and where he'll be somewhere public and get a friend with a vehicle he's never seen before. Throw on some ski masks and kidnap him. Threaten to cut his nuts off if he doesn't tell you wear the diamonds are. Keep insisting that you know that he knows where the diamonds are, and when he starts crying uncontrollably, take off your masks. Oh, and make sure you tape it and post it on the internet.
-------------------- "Every Revolutionary Was Once Considered An Enemy"
Anarchy's Avatar - Out
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XUL
OTD Janitor


Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 28,261
Loc: America
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: AnarchysAvatar]
#5361724 - 03/03/06 02:17 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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im pretty sure you could get arrested on several counts tho.
that would be funny, but hell.. i got arrested for having a toy gun in public. im sure if you kidnap somone and the cops catch you, you will be fined with public disturbance along with kindnapping charges, if the dood presses.
--------------------
TRUMP 2020
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Toddo
Stranger


Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 4,152
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
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Re: I think I hate my housemates boyfriend [Re: XUL]
#5361811 - 03/03/06 02:41 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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haha
what where you doing with a toy gun in public?
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