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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Registered: 11/07/05
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Losing my mind *DELETED*
    #5314019 - 02/18/06 05:34 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Post deleted by RatherBeAlone13

Reason for deletion: paranoid



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OfflineInfrared
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314024 - 02/18/06 05:36 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

take some vicodin


--------------------
When chemistry is outlawed.. Only outlaws have chemistry:rainbowdrink:


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OfflineGinseng1
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314026 - 02/18/06 05:36 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

what do u mean your loosing your mind?

too many thoughts at once, not enuff thoughts?

just relax man, take a deep breath and try not to do any drugs for a few days.


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Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...


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OfflineIdiot
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314030 - 02/18/06 05:37 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

I'm entering year four of that type of shit, you get used to it.


--------------------

Customize your Shroomery experience!
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: Idiot]
    #5314041 - 02/18/06 05:39 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

no, this is gotten really bad

my mind has been gone for a long while now,

but now, its not there at all... it is really completely gone


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OfflineEarthDroid
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Registered: 01/25/06
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: Idiot]
    #5314044 - 02/18/06 05:40 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

If you truly lost your mind, you wouldn't be worrying about it. But perhaps you are having a panic attack or something. Perhaps you should get a benzo to help calm you down.


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Invisibleeligal
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314046 - 02/18/06 05:41 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

look for it!! maybe its under the bed


--------------------
\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."



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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: eligal]
    #5314054 - 02/18/06 05:42 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

No, I am calm.

Just feeling lost in my own house.


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OfflineGinseng1
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: eligal]
    #5314056 - 02/18/06 05:43 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

or u can just check yourself.


--------------------
Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...


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OfflineInfrared
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: Ginseng1]
    #5314058 - 02/18/06 05:43 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

before you wiggity wreck yourself


--------------------
When chemistry is outlawed.. Only outlaws have chemistry:rainbowdrink:


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Offlinegregorio
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314059 - 02/18/06 05:44 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Have you been dealing with a lot of stress lately? Stress can fuck your mind and body over in ways that just are never appreciated. You say you have felt like this for about 4 days are so. Anything significant happen the week before leading up to this?


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: gregorio]
    #5314067 - 02/18/06 05:46 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

It all happened with a big party.
For some reason, I was drinkin, smoking and doing coke for 17 hours straight or so, everyone woke up tha next day..
And I was still up partying alone outside.

I dont know how much i did


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314070 - 02/18/06 05:47 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

But that was days ago, i should be fine by now


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OfflineInfrared
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314073 - 02/18/06 05:47 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

take a xanax.... go to bed .... nuff said


--------------------
When chemistry is outlawed.. Only outlaws have chemistry:rainbowdrink:


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Offlinedonkey2
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: Infrared]
    #5314081 - 02/18/06 05:49 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

coke is evil, the sooner you realize that, the sooner youll stop, and the sooner your mind will come back.


--------------------
Peace and Happiness to all.


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Offlinegregorio
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314085 - 02/18/06 05:50 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Well, I would lay off the coke to begin with. Eat some good healthy food, drink plenty of water, take your vitamins, start exercising even if it is nothing more than a long walk. It sounds like something that will soon pass.

Did anything bad happen at that party? Any regrets of anything that you did there?


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: donkey2]
    #5314088 - 02/18/06 05:51 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

i havent realized that yet.

and dont think i will for a long while.

And about going to bed, i cant, slept all day. And plus im bout to
head out to another party tonight, if i can make it there. I just need to be around some people tonight.


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InvisibleTHE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314094 - 02/18/06 05:53 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

RatherBeAlone13 said:
no, this is gotten really bad

my mind has been gone for a long while now,

but now, its not there at all... it is really completely gone




Have you been huffing gas recently?


--------------------
m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314096 - 02/18/06 05:54 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Regrets?? Hmm
yeah, quite a few.
But i was so fucked up that i dont really care. Didnt care then and
dont now.
And i cant lay off tha coke, i still have some here and cant help
but do it. It must seriously be about tha most addicting thing
in tha world. Its always on my mind.. It has totally re-wired me and my brain and my life.


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #5314103 - 02/18/06 05:56 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

mattzdope said:
Quote:

RatherBeAlone13 said:
no, this is gotten really bad

my mind has been gone for a long while now,

but now, its not there at all... it is really completely gone




Have you been huffing gas recently?




Haha, wow i actually laughed? Thats fun.

But no, to answer your question i havent.
No huffing of nothing for me. Im not that bad


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Offlinegregorio
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314104 - 02/18/06 05:56 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

What do you want more? Coke or your mind back?


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: gregorio]
    #5314111 - 02/18/06 05:57 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

gregorio said:
What do you want more? Coke or your mind back?




Both actually


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314122 - 02/18/06 06:01 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

one more fuckin line.
I really got a problem here.
I need to get away from life for a bit so, i can get
drugs off my mind

I really thought that I could maintain.
And I have for years, with weed.
But now coke is in tha picture and I CANT do this much longer...


--------------------


Edited by RatherBeAlone13 (02/18/06 06:02 PM)


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Offlinegregorio
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314127 - 02/18/06 06:02 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

:grin:

I don't know man, it sounds like the coke just might be the cause of your problems. I'm not trying to make this sound easy but maybe it is time to just flush the coke.


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Offlineleery11
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314129 - 02/18/06 06:03 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

if you wanna feel normal you just have to stop doing that shit.

just sit in your room for a long time and relax. watch every thought that pops up and ask yourself if it's a healthy thought or an unhealthy thought.

you just have to wait. you sound ike you don't really want to wait, you want to keep using coke. so if you want to keep using it, just know that this kind of shit is going to keep happening....

if you want to feel normal just fucking stop. if you need to see people then try and hang out with someone but not at a party where you'll probably just do it again.

your brain will go normal, you just have to let it.

you have started a self destructive desire of not liking what is happening to you, but continuing doing the things you do to make you feel that way in the first place. you will never be content until you fix this cycle.

just sit in your room and meditate. spend an hour or more doing nothing but paying attention to what it feels like to breathe and be alive. each moment becomes progressively easier until you're free. you just have to fucking let go.

psychedelics might help, maybe, but you need to get some rest and just get yourself back to doing a healthy routine of exercise and eating well and living for the moment, not for intoxicated moments.

all you need is a WILL to feel normal and you WILL feel normal.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Registered: 11/07/05
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: gregorio]
    #5314131 - 02/18/06 06:04 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

maybe im making it sound like it is. I dont know

I really dont know...


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InvisibleTHE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314135 - 02/18/06 06:04 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

You personally obviously cannot have both. :devilslist:

It's really not that hard to stop :rail: it just takes a little will power and restraint.


--------------------
m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #5314139 - 02/18/06 06:05 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

I will just go out and smoke a cigerette
and see what happens...


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Invisibleeligal
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314140 - 02/18/06 06:05 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

lay off the coke bro...


--------------------
\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."



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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: eligal]
    #5314147 - 02/18/06 06:07 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

also if you really feel the need to drugs at least just cut the coke out of the equation and stick to weed or something.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


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Offlinegregorio
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314150 - 02/18/06 06:08 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

I would lose my fucking mind if I ran out of ciggerettes.


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InvisibleDemonichildren
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #5314153 - 02/18/06 06:08 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Sounds like a spirtual quest to me. I lose myself all the time and consider myself reborn. I find this is the only way to live my life. Things of the past sometimes must be permenatly removed and your new consiouness remains. Don't be afraid, just let yourself become.


--------------------
questions of the unknown


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Offlinemrsautoman
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: eligal]
    #5314171 - 02/18/06 06:14 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

You have to be willing to go through the fire to get come out the other side clean.

You can face your pain and defeat it.

Or you can avoid your pain forever and always have it control you.

Do you want to own your life, or struggle through it until you die?

Love for you. :heart: :heart: :heart:


--------------------

~I was born of a voice untimely,
the so-called echo of a man's ordure~


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: Demonichildren]
    #5314197 - 02/18/06 06:24 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Demonichildren said:
Sounds like a spirtual quest to me. I lose myself all the time and consider myself reborn. I find this is the only way to live my life. Things of the past sometimes must be permenatly removed and your new consiouness remains. Don't be afraid, just let yourself become.




It always has been a spiritual quest for me.

But i think i figured out what i need...
or forget it i havent


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314214 - 02/18/06 06:29 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

All I have to do is make it through tha next hour.

I need to find something to do...

:rail:

(besides that)

oh, wait i got it!!


--------------------


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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
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Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314218 - 02/18/06 06:29 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

why don't you try and see if you can meditate for an hour?


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
Re: Losing my mind [Re: leery11]
    #5314230 - 02/18/06 06:32 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

meditate? I dont know tha first thing about that.

And Im surprized that someone is still here with me.

I thought id be just talking to myself from here on out

So, thank you to all of you who are still here right now!!!

Much love!


--------------------


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Offlineleery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314235 - 02/18/06 06:34 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Just breathe!

Sit down or lie down in as comfortable a position as possible, then commit a period of time to doing nothing other than paying attention to your breath.

inhale while trying to not think, then exhale and count until its time to inhale again. it's okay that your mind thinks, you just don't deliberately think about any topic on your own.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!


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InvisibleTHE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314236 - 02/18/06 06:34 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Trust me, I've been there, and understand how you feel to some extent. It's a love / hate relationship. Withdrawal really isn't the problem (unless you're a weak fuck), the problem lies in coming to terms and actually wanting to stop.


--------------------
m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
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Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
Re: Losing my mind [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #5314241 - 02/18/06 06:35 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

yeah it is cuz i dont want to stop
not at all


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
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Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314259 - 02/18/06 06:40 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

this is a pointless post i know.
But once in a lifetime wont hurt


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Offlinegregorio
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314296 - 02/18/06 06:55 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

There is nothing pointless about it at all.


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InvisibleLe_Canard
The Duk Abides

Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 94,392
Loc: Earthfarm 1 Flag
Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5314415 - 02/18/06 07:43 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Well, you have the mental wherewithal to make a post about it, so things aren't as bad as you think they are.  :thumbup:


Edited by Le_Canard (02/18/06 07:49 PM)


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OfflinePinballWizard
Naive and Gullible as usual

Registered: 03/20/04
Posts: 2,804
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: RatherBeAlone13]
    #5315012 - 02/18/06 11:18 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Read a book. Catcher in the Rye or something.


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OfflineRatherBeAlone13
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Registered: 11/07/05
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: PinballWizard]
    #5317841 - 02/19/06 08:52 PM (17 years, 11 months ago)

Update:

Things are slowly getting better. I still can only type like 10 words a minute tho. Well, maybe more..

But I think my mind is comming back....

Time for more sleeppp.....................


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