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gregorio
Too Damn Old


Registered: 09/08/05
Posts: 2,831
Loc: Classified
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
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What do you want more? Coke or your mind back?
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: gregorio]
#5314111 - 02/18/06 05:57 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
gregorio said: What do you want more? Coke or your mind back?
Both actually
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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one more fuckin line. I really got a problem here. I need to get away from life for a bit so, i can get drugs off my mind
I really thought that I could maintain. And I have for years, with weed. But now coke is in tha picture and I CANT do this much longer...
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Edited by RatherBeAlone13 (02/18/06 06:02 PM)
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gregorio
Too Damn Old


Registered: 09/08/05
Posts: 2,831
Loc: Classified
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
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I don't know man, it sounds like the coke just might be the cause of your problems. I'm not trying to make this sound easy but maybe it is time to just flush the coke.
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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if you wanna feel normal you just have to stop doing that shit.
just sit in your room for a long time and relax. watch every thought that pops up and ask yourself if it's a healthy thought or an unhealthy thought.
you just have to wait. you sound ike you don't really want to wait, you want to keep using coke. so if you want to keep using it, just know that this kind of shit is going to keep happening....
if you want to feel normal just fucking stop. if you need to see people then try and hang out with someone but not at a party where you'll probably just do it again.
your brain will go normal, you just have to let it.
you have started a self destructive desire of not liking what is happening to you, but continuing doing the things you do to make you feel that way in the first place. you will never be content until you fix this cycle.
just sit in your room and meditate. spend an hour or more doing nothing but paying attention to what it feels like to breathe and be alive. each moment becomes progressively easier until you're free. you just have to fucking let go.
psychedelics might help, maybe, but you need to get some rest and just get yourself back to doing a healthy routine of exercise and eating well and living for the moment, not for intoxicated moments.
all you need is a WILL to feel normal and you WILL feel normal.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: gregorio]
#5314131 - 02/18/06 06:04 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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maybe im making it sound like it is. I dont know
I really dont know...
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THE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
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You personally obviously cannot have both. 
It's really not that hard to stop it just takes a little will power and restraint.
-------------------- m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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I will just go out and smoke a cigerette and see what happens...
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eligal
Noobie


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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lay off the coke bro...
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: eligal]
#5314147 - 02/18/06 06:07 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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also if you really feel the need to drugs at least just cut the coke out of the equation and stick to weed or something.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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gregorio
Too Damn Old


Registered: 09/08/05
Posts: 2,831
Loc: Classified
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
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I would lose my fucking mind if I ran out of ciggerettes.
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Demonichildren
unknown


Registered: 02/18/06
Posts: 108
Loc: CA
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Sounds like a spirtual quest to me. I lose myself all the time and consider myself reborn. I find this is the only way to live my life. Things of the past sometimes must be permenatly removed and your new consiouness remains. Don't be afraid, just let yourself become.
-------------------- questions of the unknown
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mrsautoman
Don't DriveAngry


Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 166
Loc: Dirty South
Last seen: 14 years, 4 months
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: eligal]
#5314171 - 02/18/06 06:14 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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You have to be willing to go through the fire to get come out the other side clean.
You can face your pain and defeat it.
Or you can avoid your pain forever and always have it control you.
Do you want to own your life, or struggle through it until you die?
Love for you.
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~I was born of a voice untimely, the so-called echo of a man's ordure~
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Quote:
Demonichildren said: Sounds like a spirtual quest to me. I lose myself all the time and consider myself reborn. I find this is the only way to live my life. Things of the past sometimes must be permenatly removed and your new consiouness remains. Don't be afraid, just let yourself become.
It always has been a spiritual quest for me.
But i think i figured out what i need... or forget it i havent
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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All I have to do is make it through tha next hour.
I need to find something to do...

(besides that)
oh, wait i got it!!
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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why don't you try and see if you can meditate for an hour?
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Re: Losing my mind [Re: leery11]
#5314230 - 02/18/06 06:32 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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meditate? I dont know tha first thing about that.
And Im surprized that someone is still here with me.
I thought id be just talking to myself from here on out
So, thank you to all of you who are still here right now!!!
Much love!
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
Posts: 5,998
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Just breathe!
Sit down or lie down in as comfortable a position as possible, then commit a period of time to doing nothing other than paying attention to your breath.
inhale while trying to not think, then exhale and count until its time to inhale again. it's okay that your mind thinks, you just don't deliberately think about any topic on your own.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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THE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
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Trust me, I've been there, and understand how you feel to some extent. It's a love / hate relationship. Withdrawal really isn't the problem (unless you're a weak fuck), the problem lies in coming to terms and actually wanting to stop.
-------------------- m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.
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RatherBeAlone13
Stranger

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 184
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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yeah it is cuz i dont want to stop not at all
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