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Cowgold
Bullshit


Registered: 04/04/05
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Loc: .
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Spitting llama
#5269185 - 02/06/06 11:54 AM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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While reading the random masturbation generator and when it said knuckling the spitting llama, I remembered that my dad once fought a llama.
He was trying to load them all up on a trailer and they wouldn't get in the damn thing. He was getting pretty frustrated and got one of em cornered to where it had nowhere to go but on the trailer, but... It wasn't going in. That's when it started spitting on him and he lost it. He started punching it in the face and it was kicking back at him spitting. It was funny as hell. I sat back laughing my ass off and for the rest of the day, everytime he'd walk by, they'd spit at him. 
Anybody else have some stories on their parents?
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nakors_junk_bag
Lobster Bisque


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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Cowgold]
#5269200 - 02/06/06 11:59 AM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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mine was, "shaking hands with the president".
-------------------- Asshole
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Cowgold]
#5269234 - 02/06/06 12:12 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Cowgold said: Anybody else have some stories on their parents?
yeah, when I was 6, my dad whipped his car in front of my moms and cut her off, he jumped out ran up to her window and punched her, before I could blink she had a .357 in his face and he backed the fuck up really fast... a week later he was indicted on murder charges for a contract killing.
My stepfather was screwing around on my mom, she needed to get the rent money from him so she went to the chicks house and knocked, her son opened the door and said he couldnt let her in, she said it would be a good idea if he did, so he stepped asside and she went to the bedroom, she grabbed my stepfather by the hair and dragged him out of bed, blacked both of his eyes and and kicked him in the chest leaving a huge bruise, she took his pants and left. The GF came running out of the house with a butcher knife threatening to kill my mom. Mom doesnt care much for threats and started running at the bitch, she turned and ran back in and locked the door. mom used the buick to push the bitches toyota through the back wall of her garage. it's the only time I've seen mom lose her temper...
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269315 - 02/06/06 12:39 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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That is some hardcore shit! Sorry to hear that about your dad, though. Funny about the bout it bout it shit your mom pulled!
Gowgold-- I have seen camels spit at folks, but not a llama. I would have paid to see that!
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Prisoner#1
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: blissedout]
#5269332 - 02/06/06 12:43 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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my dad was a real piece of work, everything in his life was of his own doing unfortunately he was released from prison after 3 years because of a civil rights violation, the prison wouldnt let him have a news paper from his home town
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Konnrade
↑↑↓↓<--><-->BA



Registered: 09/13/05
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269338 - 02/06/06 12:46 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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well that's not very nice of them to deny his newspaper, but if that's a civil rights violation worthy of an early release from prison, then I'm eleneanor roosevelt.
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I find your lack of faith disturbing
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269339 - 02/06/06 12:46 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Wow! At least he knows his shit. Do you guys stay in contact with each other?
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Prisoner#1
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Konnrade]
#5269356 - 02/06/06 12:52 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Konnrade said: well that's not very nice of them to deny his newspaper, but if that's a civil rights violation worthy of an early release from prison, then I'm eleneanor roosevelt.
his attorney was also mine for many years, he;s one of the best, he's been at it for more than 60 years, he's 98 now... doesnt matter if it's worthy or not, just if you can convince the jury it's an attrocity.
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Cowgold
Bullshit


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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Konnrade]
#5269361 - 02/06/06 12:53 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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That is crazy they let him out for that... with overpopulated prisons I wouldn't doubt they'd be looking for a reason to let some guys out. I'd just say sorry and then start giving it to em. The more I think about it the more it makes sense though...
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Konnrade
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Cowgold]
#5269374 - 02/06/06 12:58 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Oh, I nearly forgot:
LLAMA!!!
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I find your lack of faith disturbing
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Prisoner#1
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: blissedout]
#5269375 - 02/06/06 12:59 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
blissedout said: Do you guys stay in contact with each other?
he tried avoiding contact with us until money was in the picture, he did adopt the son of a hooker that he married that abandoned him and her kid a few years into the marriage... he passed away several years ago, and the last 5 or 6 years of his life he spent trying to get to know my older brother and my sister because they bought into his bullshit, he aparently forgot about me around the time I was 17
I did do for him after his death, I took in his adopted son for a couple of years until he got established and decided to move to oklahoma where he had other family, he's turning out to be alright in spite of my father.
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Konnrade
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269382 - 02/06/06 01:02 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Crikey priz... that reads like a soap opera script
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I find your lack of faith disturbing
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Cowgold]
#5269406 - 02/06/06 01:08 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Cowgold said: The more I think about it the more it makes sense though...
really? the death penalty made more sense to me, theres no repeat offenders when you execute them
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Cowgold
Bullshit


Registered: 04/04/05
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269422 - 02/06/06 01:15 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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I went back and read that closer... releasing someone in jail for murder for no newspaper is ridiculous.
I can see them letting someone out for that though...
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269431 - 02/06/06 01:19 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Prisoner#1 said: ...he's turning out to be alright in spite of my father.
Happy endings are nice. You seem to be a cool guy, too. Life is a huge mystery, that is for sure.
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Prisoner#1
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Konnrade]
#5269436 - 02/06/06 01:20 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Konnrade said: Crikey priz... that reads like a soap opera script
only if you let it get to you, if I went into the details of the killing like that he used my moms marlin .22, made a silencer from a lawnmower muffler, tested in in the garage by shooting bags of cement and how he tried to frame up my mom by using a car registered in her name and then checking his girlfriends 8 month old baby into a local hospital under my name, having the GF wear a wig to impersonate my mom all to try placing my mom at the scene (wouldnt that implicate him too?)
the only thing he ever did that affected me was doubting me the first time I can remember, I was about 3yo and caught a bird that landed on a fence, I stalked it and grabbed it by the feet, went to show it to him, he said it couldnt fly and I told him it could, he called ma a liar, I tossed it in the air and it flew away.
the rest of my childhood was pretty well fucked but it's not shit if you're capable of realizing that those experiences dont have to dictate the rest of your life, your life is in your hands, it;s up to you to direct it.
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Prisoner#1
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: blissedout]
#5269450 - 02/06/06 01:23 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
blissedout said:
Quote:
Prisoner#1 said: ...he's turning out to be alright in spite of my father.
Happy endings are nice. You seem to be a cool guy, too. Life is a huge mystery, that is for sure.
My motto has always been "life is a sucking, swirling eddy of dispair with brief moments of false hope", as long as I believe I'm always at the bottom, the only direction I can choose is up.
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Konnrade
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5269588 - 02/06/06 02:05 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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For small caliber guns, sticking the end of the muzzle into the neck of an empty soda bottle supposedly works as a suppresor for one round, maybe two.
Of course the muffler probably worked better.
But that's one hell of an anecdote priz, I'm not quite sure I know what to make of it all. :dumbfounded:
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I find your lack of faith disturbing
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Prisoner#1
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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Konnrade]
#5269710 - 02/06/06 02:39 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Konnrade said: But that's one hell of an anecdote priz, I'm not quite sure I know what to make of it all. :dumbfounded:
yeah.. that seems to be the normal reaction
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mediman0078
Stilllooking.....

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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5270735 - 02/06/06 06:25 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Damn, man... we know where the name came from now!
...clever bit with the lawn mower muffler... not that that's a good thing....
at least genetics don't confer habits readily, right?
-------------------- ........someday I'll find it.
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mediman0078
Stilllooking.....

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Llamas are just as bad as friggin' camels, slobbery stubborn hairballs... I'd like to have seen the boxing match 'tween your dad and the spitter. That had to be funny. Llama spit stinks too... we had a neighbor that had a few and one of them sprayed me down once when I was near the fenceline. Disgusting... almost made me start puking.
-------------------- ........someday I'll find it.
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PDU
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off topic now i guess, but when i was a kid, i was at the zoo in a stroller, and a llama tried spitting on me.
-------------------- GO OUTSIDE.
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Prisoner#1
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Quote:
mediman0078 said:
 Damn, man... we know where the name came from now! clever bit with the lawn mower muffler... not that that's a good thing....
at least genetics don't confer habits readily, right?
I earned the name myself, no outside influence to blame
I left out some vital bits abou the silencer but I watched him through the whole process, I cna make one from a mag light and hockey pucks that rivals anything made for the military
as for genetics, it could be a factor but I prefer to assume responsibility for what I do, and on occasion for things other have done
I AM JOSEPH MENGELE
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mediman0078
Stilllooking.....

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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5270811 - 02/06/06 06:43 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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you know, i've heard of using a bit of threaded pipe on a tapped barrel with several hockey puck plugs drilled through on a press... I guess it does work.
-------------------- ........someday I'll find it.
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Prisoner#1
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there's more to it than that, a baffling system and diffusers are also required those remain a secret
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mediman0078
Stilllooking.....

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Re: Spitting llama [Re: Prisoner#1]
#5270831 - 02/06/06 06:47 PM (17 years, 11 months ago) |
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Does it wind up looking like a Folgers can on the end of your gun? One of those copper wool pot scrubber packed jobs?
-------------------- ........someday I'll find it.
Edited by mediman0078 (02/06/06 06:48 PM)
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mediman0078
Stilllooking.....

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damn, we jacked this thread bad. poor llama thread....
-------------------- ........someday I'll find it.
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Prisoner#1
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Quote:
mediman0078 said: Does it wind up looking like a Folgers can on the end of your gun? One of those copper wool pot scrubber packed jobs?
nope... it inds up looking a lot like these and it built in much the same mannor
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