This ones for the ladies...
I just smoke weed in this trip report, nothing more. I am a regular weed smoker, so this "trip" really surprised me, happy reading.
So after smoking 2 joints in my room (wanted to blaze alone tonight) I lay down. For some reason I got the urge to pray, so that I did. As I started praying, I started tripping out huge. Part of me thought it was god showing me something, but another part thought it was the weed, and I was essentially acting like an idiot in front of god.
Then all of a sudden I got a rather big boner, which caught my attention. Suddenly I got a huge urge to jack off, so I essentially told god I?d come back to pray later. As I did this I felt as if I betrayed god, and that if I?well?came, that the devil would get control of me.
So anyhow, best freaking wank ever, it felt a shitload better than sex, just fucking wow. I knew that when I came I?d be going to hell but I just didn?t care. So, that I did, and to hell I went.
At first I was really scared on what was gonna happen, so I lay down. All of a sudden this ?scary? music starts in my head, and I am informed by an anonymous person that I was soon about to be given my introduction to hell, something called a ?pain wave?.
It was essentially like a series of spinning invisible saw blades would be slicing through me at any moment, and I would have to withstand the pain. I then felt a weird feeling in my stomach, and was soon told that that?s what the pain would be like if it was divided by 10 billion. So I was like ?Oh fuck, how am I gonna handle this.?
Then BOOM, I started tripping out huge again. I thought that the first wave of pain had hit me, and because my mind was unable to fathom this pain, it instead started to ?trip out? in order to handle it better, and that I would be stuck in this ?trip out world? for a very long time.
I recall trying to tell myself this was all the weed, which I believed, chilled out, and then all of a sudden started giving in again. I knew I was really high, and I knew it was time to smoke my third joint. This high had bad vibes, cause I have a lot of shit going on, but for some reason I liked it.
After blazing it I sat there, enjoying some pretty fucked up shit, like half of my body crumbling up like burnt hair and breaking off when I touched it (well it felt that way). Another thing was that my body was warm under covers, but my head was cold (airing out my room). So I felt like my body was in hell and my head in heaven. Eventually my head started separating from my body, until I was both in heaven and hell at the same time, fucked up shit.
Also I recall that when I got to sleep, I had a dream where I was pregnant, and the day I was due, my mom asked me how I was gonna have the baby (I?m a dude), and that shot me into a world of horror that they wouldn?t be able to get my baby out. Weird.
========================================== Meh, it was more of a spiritual ?trip? than anything, and metaphorical I think. The fact that lust took over me, and I had to get satisfaction even if it involved turning to the devil. I?m not a religious person, I?m not even sure if I believe in God, but either way, I think that shit meant something. It seemed as if some higher power was telling me I was giving into lust (most likely drugs), and it was damaging others. It was if I was being told that a greedy act that hurts others is one of the more sinful things a person can do.
But, as in the real life metaphor, I am helpless to the power of lust, no matter what the consequences.
Thanks for reading.
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that's pretty messed up.....
weed + masturbation is indeed a sight to be seen..... but..... what makes you think sexual pleasure is wrong? I mean, there's no way to say either way, but it seems like you were battling your "shadow" or something, with all the repressed sexual urges that just came out and overwhelmed you...... being a human means a lot of things... it means being a lustful creature... it means having a connection to "God"..... etc... it can all be represented through the chakras.
overindulgence in ONE aspect at the ignorance of all others is quite bad for you, but it may be necessary to show you where you have deficits and imbalances.
Weed definitely makes you trip though...... I had an encounter with the "devil" in my dreams after a smoking session once.... I kind of understand what it meant, maybe... and I really understood yesterday while high.
But yeah... just think of the wanking as something you needed to get out of the way, perhaps.
whats real odd is yesterday I had to take the most constipated dump ever, and I was so high that I kept thinking "man I'm giving birth... this is horrible... I don't want to ever be a woman... ever... how can they go through this........ but no this is just the weed making me imagine things...."
you dreaming of being pregnant reminded me.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
Edited by leery11 (11/14/05 12:13 PM)
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