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InvisibleTacticalBongRip
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Registered: 08/20/05
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does your girl wig out when you look at porn?
    #4621550 - 09/05/05 03:54 AM (11 years, 11 months ago)

so i've been married to my girl a couple years now and things have been real smooth except for this one thing... she totally wigs out on me whenever she finds out i was lookin at porn... this causes huge ass fights b/c

1)it pisses me off to no end because she goes looking on my computer to see what i was looking at

2) i dont feel like a free person much of the time ( i've agreed to only look once a month..) tried stopping totally but i just get fuckin horny and i want to see something different.

I tried to explain to her, and i dunno if any of you guys who have been with your girl a long time feel the same but i would assume so, that the more I look at porn the more im in the mood for sex ( which she wants, i want it too but not every time i get horny... am i making sense?)

is porn really that wrong?? ive looked at porn my entire life, and ive stood my ground for months with her telling her its just who i am and she cannot change me. but because of this she turns into the worst fucking person to live with so i eventually just say fuck it and tell her i wont look at it but once a month... but times like these where shes at work i just wanna jerk it and get on with my life.

argh.. being married is tough ( and im young, only 23) . not sure how much longer I can put up with this or maybe im just being a greedy dickhead . /shrugs. i wanna talk with this about some of my friends but they have girls too and whenever we all hang out everyone brings their girls so its kinda hard to talk about this shit. i mentioned that i want to start having a guys night out ( for reasons i already explained) and she wigged out again accusing me of just want to oogle girls with my friends at bars, and then she got even more upset saying "you never take me out places!!". but to be honest i dont really have the fucking motivation to go out much,, most of my entertainment comes from just chilling out my house playing online video games with friends....blah


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Invisibleadrug

Registered: 02/04/03
Posts: 15,800
Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4622038 - 09/05/05 12:04 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Sounds like its more of an insecurity problem on her part than a problem with you. She probably won't take this suggestion very well, but maybe she should lighten up? :smirk:


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Offlinedrtyfrnk
PresidentialCandidate 2008
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: adrug]
    #4622086 - 09/05/05 12:32 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Nice name, btw.

And yes, adrug sounds correct in the assumption that it is an insecurity issue on her part.


--------------------
It's Krang, Bitch!  :krang:


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InvisibleMushie_Man
Fuck Up

Registered: 05/21/04
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Loc: UK
Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4622222 - 09/05/05 01:39 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

What she doesn't know wont hurt her, you have your needs.

:whacker:


--------------------
Ecstacy got me standing next to you
Getting sentimental as fuck spillin' guts to you
We just met
But I think I'm in love with you
But you're on it too
So you tell me you love me too
Wake up in the morning like "yo, what the fuck we do?"


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InvisibleShroomismM
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: Mushie_Man]
    #4622254 - 09/05/05 01:49 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

If she can't take you looking at porn that's her problem not yours. Actually that is your problem because it creates a control issue - her desire to control you. A good girlfriend will "let" you look at porn.. may even look at it with you.


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Offlinedrtyfrnk
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: Shroomism]
    #4622424 - 09/05/05 02:36 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

may even "do it" with you while watching it if she's a dirty dirty girl... :tongue:


--------------------
It's Krang, Bitch!  :krang:


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Invisibleyousuck
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Registered: 05/23/05
Posts: 616
Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: drtyfrnk]
    #4622641 - 09/05/05 03:33 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

insecurity is a common answer, but its really about differences in biological sexuality.

girls, as you well may know, dont require any sort of mental/visual stimulus to orgasm. sex to them is having something rubbing against their cunts, it could be you, another guy, a toy, the shower, a motorbike, a dryer, etc.... Its all the same in the end.

guys require mental stimuli, like porn or whatever. We enjoy watching girls be pleasured, or the thought of pleasuring girls, its never about just beating off, as just beating off while staring blankly at a wall without fantasizing does nothing. Their sexuality is receptive, ours is perceptive.

making her understand this is the first part of overcoming this little issue. the second part is realizing that women/girls dont mature mental or emotionally past the age of 12, so in turn you must treat all women as if they are children, for they are, and always have been the mental and emotional inferiors of men. This is just biology and evolution, not at all mysoginy.

If you take a girl too seriously, there will always be problems.


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Offlinedrtyfrnk
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: yousuck]
    #4622774 - 09/05/05 04:06 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

yousuck said:
the second part is realizing that women/girls dont mature mental or emotionally past the age of 12, so in turn you must treat all women as if they are children, for they are, and always have been the mental and emotional inferiors of men. This is just biology and evolution, not at all mysoginy.





You must be joking.


--------------------
It's Krang, Bitch!  :krang:


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Invisiblebadchad
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Registered: 03/02/05
Posts: 11,999
Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: drtyfrnk]
    #4623219 - 09/05/05 06:42 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

I actually consider myself somewhat of a "Porn Connoisseur". I go through tons of it.

My gf knows I love porn and she is faced with two choices: 1. Let me watch porn OR 2. Be extremely sore.

I'd rather do her then spank it while watching the comp. The reality is however, that her drive is nowhere near mine.


--------------------
...the whole experience is (and is as) a profound piece of knowledge.  It is an indellible experience; it is forever known.  I have known myself in a way I doubt I would have ever occurred except as it did.

Smith, P.  Bull. Menninger Clinic (1959) 23:20-27; p. 27.

...most subjects find the experience valuable, some find it frightening, and many say that is it uniquely lovely.

Osmond, H.  Annals, NY Acad Science (1957) 66:418-434; p.436


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Invisibleadrug

Registered: 02/04/03
Posts: 15,800
Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: yousuck]
    #4623491 - 09/05/05 07:50 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

girls, as you well may know, dont require any sort of mental/visual stimulus to orgasm. sex to them is having something rubbing against their cunts, it could be you, another guy, a toy, the shower, a motorbike, a dryer, etc.... Its all the same in the end.




That is absolutely not true.


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Invisibleyousuck
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Registered: 05/23/05
Posts: 616
Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: adrug]
    #4623673 - 09/05/05 08:48 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

I actually consider myself somewhat of a "Porn Connoisseur".




you have a sexual addiction.


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InvisibleSilversoul
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Registered: 01/01/05
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4623758 - 09/05/05 09:13 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Meh...different people have different levels of jealousy. Some people get mad if they even see anyone looking at their significant other. Other people have open relationships, where they allow each other to sleep around, as long as they're open and honest about it. If I had a girl, I'd be ok with anything up to closed-mouth kisses. My first girlfriend got upset when she found porn on my computer, but my second girlfriend used to watch porn with me. I can't tell you to change a girl, but I will say that the important thing is not to be a hypocrite. Only watch porn if you'd be ok with her having pics of naked guys on her computer. Other than that, I'll just say best of luck to you, and I hope she lightens up.


--------------------


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InvisibleTacticalBongRip
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: Silversoul]
    #4624835 - 09/06/05 10:21 AM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Thanks for the replies. I'm definately not being a hypocrite here as I told her i would be totally fine with her looking at porn. She says she has tried and it just doesnt turn her on at all. Today she came upstairs while i was banging on my drums with calendar in hand asking why I was looking at porn on such and such a date after i promised I wouldnt but once a month. I have run into trouble lying to her about it because she always manages to find out. This shit puts me in a bad mood and makes me think of days when I didnt have someone breathing down my neck making sure I didnt cross "their" lines. That is why I moved out of my parents house after all...

So far I am keeping my promise of only looking once a month but I fucking crave sex a lot when shes not around , and even find myself using my brain to make up some mental porn, which takes creativity and a lot more time than just for a single stress relieving jerk-a-thon in front of some porn. I'm making her happy(sorta...women can be hard to please), but seemingly at the cost of my own mental well being.

Its a pretty complicated situation and I know I cant expect anyone to give me good answers to my problem but it helps to type this shit out, helps organize it in my head and I guess thats what this forum is sometimes all about, just gettin shit off your chest, same principle behind a shrink. good times :smile: i think ill smoke a bowl now


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InvisibleTien
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4624878 - 09/06/05 10:52 AM (11 years, 11 months ago)

I do myself to porn all the time, I think my girlriend knows it but we never talk about it. It's a neutral ground.

I think your girlfriend has no reason for freaking out at you, I mean we have our needs, don't we? Since I am not a woman, I don't know how they think. Here's an intresting statistic for you (I heard it when I was watching discover channel or something) 75% of American women consider porn to be cheating

...just food for thought.

Pluto


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Invisiblemoog
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Registered: 02/15/05
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4624936 - 09/06/05 11:16 AM (11 years, 11 months ago)

It actually sounds like she's jealous. Chick logic usually goes like this: "if he's looking at porn he must not be satisfied with me." Of course that's not true, but a lot of women think like that.

Women tend to be more satisfied with just one sexual partner, while men tend to desire multiple sexual partners at one time. So when a man is in a committed relationship, he'll still desire other partners. This is a fact. Guys in relationships though have to resort to fantasizing with porn to take care of those needs. I think your wife needs to understand this. It seems like she doesn't understand male sexuality. You need to be a man and set the record straight. Assure her that she satisfies you sexually. Explain to her that, while she gives you everything you desire, men constantly have diverse sexual desires that no single woman could ever satsify, even if she was a sex goddess. She needs to know this. All women need to know this, even though it's not something they want to hear.


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InvisibleIcelander
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4624986 - 09/06/05 11:47 AM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Just the opposite. She digs it and encourages me to look and then act out the fantasies that ensue, with her.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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OfflineAnnomM
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4625026 - 09/06/05 12:01 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

TacticalBongRip said:
So far I am keeping my promise of only looking once a month but I fucking crave sex a lot when shes not around , and even find myself using my brain to make up some mental porn, which takes creativity and a lot more time than just for a single stress relieving jerk-a-thon in front of some porn. I'm making her happy(sorta...women can be hard to please), but seemingly at the cost of my own mental well being.




That's what most people do as far as I know. It's called fantasizing. I prefer that over porn most of the time.


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InvisibleIrradiated_Feces
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4625044 - 09/06/05 12:04 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Dude, I know how you feel. My girl hates porn. I argued about it with her a couple times and got nowhere. She thinks it's disrespectful and all this shit while I tell her shes just insecure and has no reason to be. She'd probably freak if she knew I had porn, above the two mags I already told her I have and had before I moved in with her and hadn't used since before I met her, which she was upset about. Women can be so irrational sometimes. I get more than enough sex but damn sometimes you just need a good jerk to yourself.


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InvisibleSilversoul
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4625047 - 09/06/05 12:05 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

TacticalBongRip said:
Thanks for the replies. I'm definately not being a hypocrite here as I told her i would be totally fine with her looking at porn. She says she has tried and it just doesnt turn her on at all. Today she came upstairs while i was banging on my drums with calendar in hand asking why I was looking at porn on such and such a date after i promised I wouldnt but once a month. I have run into trouble lying to her about it because she always manages to find out. This shit puts me in a bad mood and makes me think of days when I didnt have someone breathing down my neck making sure I didnt cross "their" lines. That is why I moved out of my parents house after all...

So far I am keeping my promise of only looking once a month but I fucking crave sex a lot when shes not around , and even find myself using my brain to make up some mental porn, which takes creativity and a lot more time than just for a single stress relieving jerk-a-thon in front of some porn. I'm making her happy(sorta...women can be hard to please), but seemingly at the cost of my own mental well being.

Its a pretty complicated situation and I know I cant expect anyone to give me good answers to my problem but it helps to type this shit out, helps organize it in my head and I guess thats what this forum is sometimes all about, just gettin shit off your chest, same principle behind a shrink. good times :smile: i think ill smoke a bowl now



See, lying is just going to get you into more trouble.  It's better to be upfront about it and let her deal with it than to do it behind her back and lie about it.  She may take a while to come around, but I think most women would rather have a guy be honest.


--------------------


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Offlineastralasia
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Registered: 07/17/04
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Re: does your girl wig out when you look at porn? [Re: TacticalBongRip]
    #4625119 - 09/06/05 12:38 PM (11 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

TacticalBongRip said:

1)it pisses me off to no end because she goes looking on my computer to see what i was looking at






Why don't you leave this thread open on your computer, let her read it. The only way you are going to resolve any problems is through frank and honest communication. You have to explain to her how you really feel, about YOUR needs and she needs to listen and in return you need to listen to her needs/concerns. Once you both know exactly what each other wants you should at least be able to come to a compromise.


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