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InvisibleBurke Dennings

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 78,314
Trip Report
    #4619645 - 09/04/05 05:30 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

Disclaimer:  Even though this isn't a conventional trip report per se, I feel it belongs in this forum, as the general experience was undoubtedly the trippiest thing I've ever done.

Well, I finally did it.  After months of putting it off, and growing it longer, I decided to have my chinbeard waxed.  And here's the story:

For the past year, I've been growing and maintaining a beautiful chinbeard.  It all started last July, when I noticed that if I let my chin hairs grow a little, they looked like pubes.  I thought this "chin pube" look was really sophisticated, and decided that the ladies might think so too.  Before I knew it, I wasn't shaving anything below my jawline.  It was a real rush, waking up everyday and sprinting to the bathroom mirror to see how much Bork Jr. (that's what I named the beard) had grown.  That alone was pretty trippy.

But it doesn't stop there.  The other day, I realized that since I'm faced with getting a job, the chinbeard would have to go.  :frown:  I couldn't do something lame like shave it off; this scraggly lil' rascal deserved better.  After exploring several options including burning it off, and freezing it with liquid nitrogen, and then hitting it with a hammer, I decided to go with waxing, for the simple reason that it wouldn't do any lasting damage.

My sister goes to some place for various waxings, and referred me to this lovely Cambodian couple:  Sung Yi and Carl.  They assured me that they'd had experience with this particular kind of waxing, which they ominously referred to as "the widow maker". 

After much thought, reflection, and meditation, I found myself sitting in a seat at their shop, being slathered under the mandible with hot wax.  This alone was not unpleasant, and I may replicate the experience later in my apartment.  I felt them press whatever kind of wax-and-hair absorbent cloth on my precious beard-friend.  I closed my eyes, balled my fists, and clenched my sphincter.

The next thing I know, I feel this intense tugging sensation on my chin, followed by a loud ripping sound and a burning sensation.  Through my shut eyelids I could see stars, and all sound was drowned out by a cacophany of beautiful indie rock, playing somewhere in my mind.  They touched up the rest of the spots, while I sat there in awe of what just happened.  I got up from the chair, lightheaded, paid them, and then stumbled out the door.  It was a bittersweet moment, a truly sad and beautiful reminder of the cycle of life.

So, I have this smooth chin right now.  I miss the chinbeard, but I'm glad my friends can't call me the "Amish Outlaw" any more.  Such is life.  :grin:


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Mr. Tato goes-a clap!
Mr. Tato, all the little things you hear...


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InvisibleHELLA_TIGHT
Madge the Smoking Vag
Female User Gallery
Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 08/20/03
Posts: 84,350
Loc: Afghanistan Flag
Re: Trip Report [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #4619693 - 09/04/05 05:47 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

christ


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InvisibleCaptainH13
Scum
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/29/04
Posts: 10,287
Re: Trip Report [Re: HELLA_TIGHT]
    #4619705 - 09/04/05 05:51 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

did you get totally fuxxored?


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Invisibledblaney
Human Being

Registered: 10/03/04
Posts: 7,894
Loc: Here & Now
Re: Trip Report [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #4619713 - 09/04/05 05:54 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

:rockon:


--------------------
"What is in us that turns a deaf ear to the cries of human suffering?"

"Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword"
- John Mayer

Making the noise "penicillin" is no substitute for actually taking penicillin.

"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or their revolutionary right to dismember or overthrow it." -Abraham Lincoln


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Offlineeggaloo
shizo :D

Registered: 09/02/05
Posts: 65
Loc: B.C
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Trip Report [Re: dblaney]
    #4620328 - 09/04/05 09:11 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

fight the smooth chinned Man electrode :grin:


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:rockon:BC BUD 4 LIFE:rockon:


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InvisibleTHE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
 User Gallery
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,326
Re: Trip Report [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #4621642 - 09/05/05 04:33 AM (11 years, 7 months ago)

Very nice report, one of the best I've read on the site. One question though. :smile:



Is there any noted afterglow to the experience?


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m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.


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Offlinestefan
work in progress

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 8,932
Loc: The Netherlands
Last seen: 2 months, 26 days
Re: Trip Report [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
    #4621729 - 09/05/05 05:42 AM (11 years, 7 months ago)

the afterglow is probably a smooth chin for weeks after :smirk:


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OfflineMighty Bop
Big Boy

Registered: 06/30/01
Posts: 1,920
Loc: Nowhere
Last seen: 4 months, 25 days
Re: Trip Report [Re: stefan]
    #4622069 - 09/05/05 12:22 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

So why didn't you just shave it off again?


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"One attaineth whatever state of being one thinketh about at the last when relinquishing the body, being ever absorbed in the thought thereof." - Sri Krishna to Arjuna, Bhagavad Gita, viii, 6


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InvisibleOneMoreRobot3021
Male

Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 60,935
Loc: the sky
Re: Trip Report [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #4622404 - 09/05/05 02:31 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

Har dee har har


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Acid doesn't give you truths; it builds machines that push the envelope of perception. Whatever revelations came to me then have dissolved like skywriting. All I really know is that those few years saddled me with a faith in the redemptive potential of the imagination which, however flat, stale and unprofitable the world seems to me now, I cannot for the life of me shake.

-Erik Davis


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Invisibleit stars saddam
Satan

Registered: 05/20/05
Posts: 15,561
Loc: Spahn Ranch
Re: Trip Report [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #4622432 - 09/05/05 02:38 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

:strokebeard:


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OfflineNashbar Happy Birthday
just strange.... on drugs
Male User Gallery

Registered: 07/16/05
Posts: 3,536
Loc: strawberry field
Last seen: 7 years, 3 months
Re: Trip Report [Re: OneMoreRobot3021]
    #4622437 - 09/05/05 02:39 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

i've got the full beard going... it's been several years since I've shaved down to my face, just trims. Just this weekend some friends were trying to get me to shave. I said "no" at the time, but had since been reconsidering it (it grows back). A nice trip report has always been inspiration for me to do things.


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:pacman: :mushroom2:



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InvisibleOneMoreRobot3021
Male

Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 60,935
Loc: the sky
Re: Trip Report [Re: Nashbar]
    #4622443 - 09/05/05 02:41 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

I think electrode wrote this Trip Report cuz I have an Amish beard.


--------------------
Acid doesn't give you truths; it builds machines that push the envelope of perception. Whatever revelations came to me then have dissolved like skywriting. All I really know is that those few years saddled me with a faith in the redemptive potential of the imagination which, however flat, stale and unprofitable the world seems to me now, I cannot for the life of me shake.

-Erik Davis


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Invisiblemantis
Male User Gallery

Registered: 01/26/03
Posts: 5,235
Loc: Bunker Alpha, GMC Flag
Re: Trip Report [Re: Burke Dennings]
    #4622482 - 09/05/05 02:49 PM (11 years, 7 months ago)

trippy! :hippie:


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