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InvisibleKlingonFromUranus
enthusiast

Registered: 05/03/03
Posts: 488
Loc: Los Angeles
Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!!
    #4605041 - 08/31/05 08:48 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

PARIS, France --

Lance Armstrong's record setting seventh Tour de France victory, along with his entire Tour de France legacy, may be tarnished by what could turn out to be one of the greatest sports scandals of all time. Armstrong is being quizzed by French police after three banned substances were found in his South France hotel room while on vacation after winning the 2005 Tour de France.

The three substances found were toothpaste, deodorant, and soap which have been banned by French authorities for over 75 years.

Armstrong's girlfriend, American rocker Sheryl Crowe, is quoted as saying "We use them every day in America, so we naturally thought they'd be ok throughout Europe."

Along with these three banned substances, French authorities also physically searched Armstrong and found several other interesting items that they had never seen before, including a backbone and a testicle.


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InvisibleDNKYD
Turtle!

Registered: 09/24/04
Posts: 12,326
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4605048 - 08/31/05 08:49 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Bwaahahahahaha! Dirty French bastards.


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InvisibleOneMoreRobot3021
Male

Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 60,935
Loc: the sky
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4605050 - 08/31/05 08:50 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

:rofl:


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Acid doesn't give you truths; it builds machines that push the envelope of perception. Whatever revelations came to me then have dissolved like skywriting. All I really know is that those few years saddled me with a faith in the redemptive potential of the imagination which, however flat, stale and unprofitable the world seems to me now, I cannot for the life of me shake.

-Erik Davis


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Invisiblebukkake
LEFT WING NUT
Male

Registered: 05/28/05
Posts: 2,746
Loc: Classified
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: OneMoreRobot3021]
    #4605051 - 08/31/05 08:50 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

A backbone and a testicle?


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InvisibleDNKYD
Turtle!

Registered: 09/24/04
Posts: 12,326
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: bukkake]
    #4605062 - 08/31/05 08:51 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

I thought he only had one?


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InvisibleTYL3R
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/19/04
Posts: 17,473
Loc: Chico
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4605065 - 08/31/05 08:51 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

:rotfl:


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InvisibleSmushroom
Avid Learner
Registered: 02/02/05
Posts: 2,803
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: bukkake]
    #4605081 - 08/31/05 08:54 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

French done have the balls to do anything or are considered spineless would be the pun on that.

I heard they arrested Cheryl for having a razor too. Said she was in possession with intent to shave.


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OfflineNashbar
just strange.... on drugs
Male User Gallery

Registered: 07/16/05
Posts: 3,536
Loc: strawberry field
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: Smushroom]
    #4605210 - 08/31/05 09:13 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

this story is nothing new, there is just proof now... I've been in bike racing for 10 years or so and it's been common knowledge. he admitted to using EPO in his book, he's tested postitive before. I hope he (and all those baseball players) get whats coming to them. A short, unhealthy life and a shameful reputation to be remember with.

But it's publicity, Lance sells bikes and sponsors, baseball players fill stadiums. Lets just ignore performance drugs and see what the human body is really capable of for my own entertainment....


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:pacman: :mushroom2:



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Invisiblemantis
Male User Gallery

Registered: 01/26/03
Posts: 5,235
Loc: Bunker Alpha, GMC Flag
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4605226 - 08/31/05 09:16 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

A French joke? Cool, that's not too played out.


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Offlinedebianlinux
Myconerd - DBK
Male User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 12/09/02
Posts: 8,272
Loc: Over There
Last seen: 2 months, 18 days
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: Nashbar]
    #4605270 - 08/31/05 09:23 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Nashbar said:
this story is nothing new, there is just proof now... I've been in bike racing for 10 years or so and it's been common knowledge. he admitted to using EPO in his book, he's tested postitive before. I hope he (and all those baseball players) get whats coming to them. A short, unhealthy life and a shameful reputation to be remember with.

But it's publicity, Lance sells bikes and sponsors, baseball players fill stadiums. Lets just ignore performance drugs and see what the human body is really capable of for my own entertainment....




i'm not down with performance enhancers in sports but Lance remains an inspiration to me. that dude has survived cancer for christ's sake. i'm sure he used some illegal substances for that shit too. whoopee. he beats the shit out of the prime cyclists every single year. his determination and focus make him a living legend.


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Invisibleblissedout
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder Flag
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4605293 - 08/31/05 09:26 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

:smile2: :lol: :rofl: :rofl2: :biggrin:


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:murray:


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Invisibleafoaf
CEO DBK?
 User Gallery

Registered: 11/08/02
Posts: 32,665
Loc: Ripple's Heart
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4605865 - 08/31/05 11:12 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

comedy


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All I know is The Growery is a place where losers who get banned here go.


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OfflineNashbar
just strange.... on drugs
Male User Gallery

Registered: 07/16/05
Posts: 3,536
Loc: strawberry field
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: debianlinux]
    #4605912 - 08/31/05 11:22 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

debianlinux said:
i'm not down with performance enhancers in sports but Lance remains an inspiration to me. that dude has survived cancer for christ's sake. i'm sure he used some illegal substances for that shit too. whoopee. he beats the shit out of the prime cyclists every single year. his determination and focus make him a living legend.




I ride a lot and I totally agree he's an inspiration and gives me some fictious goal. He's raised tons of money for great causes and increased popularity for a dead sport. But it's no coincidence that he admits to using a common performance enhancers, tests positive, has witnesses of drug use and then wins repeatedly over the best in the world. I'm pretty sure you can find references for drug allegations from before his cancer too.

edit: have you watched his races? he dominates no one, except tired riders.


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:pacman: :mushroom2:



Edited by Nashbar (08/31/05 11:24 PM)


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Offlinedrtyfrnk
PresidentialCandidate 2008
Male

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 2,961
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Last seen: 7 years, 4 months
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: Nashbar]
    #4607290 - 09/01/05 09:54 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

:rotfl:

great man, just great :laugh:


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It's Krang, Bitch!  :krang:


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InvisibleCowgold
Bullshit

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 12,486
Loc: .
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4607308 - 09/01/05 10:07 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)



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"You might not be aware of this, but there are a lot of dickheads on the Internet." - D. Wong


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InvisibleLe_Canard
I AM NOT A FISH!

Registered: 05/17/03
Posts: 93,521
Loc: Earthfarm 1 Flag
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: KlingonFromUranus]
    #4607318 - 09/01/05 10:13 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

And what about that missing testicle? Why has it not been seen in years? And why is the CIA so silent about it? And the Aliens - why do they refuse comment on this important issue? Some speculate it may be acting as a double agent in China, and I have pictures to prove it! They're around here somewhere. I'm sure I left them on davenport last night....


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Offlinedrtyfrnk
PresidentialCandidate 2008
Male

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 2,961
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Last seen: 7 years, 4 months
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: Cowgold]
    #4607324 - 09/01/05 10:14 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Cowgold said:





Best. Picture. Ever.


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It's Krang, Bitch!  :krang:


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InvisibleAdden
Extraordinary Beast
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 35,777
Loc: Amongst the Dunes
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: drtyfrnk]
    #4607455 - 09/01/05 11:24 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

I went to middle school with an albino black chick that looked like that.



I'm going to hell, I know.


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InvisibleCowgold
Bullshit

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 12,486
Loc: .
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: Adden]
    #4607469 - 09/01/05 11:29 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

nah she'd laugh about it too if she saw that pic... "OMG! that looks just like me, hahahah snort snort"

my sister said somethin about a albino black kid and I laughed all day... it just struck me as HILARIOUS


Edited by Cowgold (09/01/05 11:30 AM)


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Offlineecoman2
Stranger
Registered: 08/03/05
Posts: 34
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Lance Armstrong caught RED-HANDED!!! [Re: Cowgold]
    #4607564 - 09/01/05 12:07 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

I think steroid use should be mandatory in pro sports. That would be good TV...and no pads or helmets......Then they would truly earn the big bucks.


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