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 Jaimie
Stranger
Registered: 08/14/05
Posts: 87
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 20 days
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 Doing things for the sake of experience? 
#4602516 - 08/31/05 03:56 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Lately I've been struggling to accept this reason for doing anything as valid. I'd really like to gain some insight. I feel like my view is very narrow, no matter how hard I try to be open.
I just can't accept it. I can't accept "for the experience" as a reasonable explanation for actions, no matter what they are: sex, drugs, love, anything. It makes me cry at night when I think about it. It feels wrong, it feels hurtful, it feels empty. It seems to lack passion. I want to do things because I feel passionately about them not because I feel like I need to experience everything to be complete.
Am I just misinterpreting when people provide this explanation? Are experiences, on their own, a reason to explore people, ideas, things? Is everything worth exploring even if you don't have prior interest or passion in it?
I feel lost here. I can't sleep.
 Thanks for any help.
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 eligal
Noobie
Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4602522 - 08/31/05 04:02 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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you cant feel passionate about something until you know what its about and how it makes you feel. so you try things to experience it and see if it will give you this passionate feeling or not. if it doesnt, you move on, if it does, youve just found something you might just come to love.
thats why you do it for the sake of experience.
also, you should try to understand the world you live in. understand and feel what life has to offer. you try things to open your knowledge. why do people go to school, to learn. but not everything in life can be found in school. thus you learn outside as well, and do new things to open your intelectual interpretation of people and life in general.
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\m/ Spanksta \m/
"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"
"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"
"tactik said:
respect the can."
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,172
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4602553 - 08/31/05 04:23 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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you are a strong fighter
this is something you have grown up with.
learn to take off your fighting masks and gloves and put them aside.
people must have trouble telling you to get out of your rut, and so have told you to do things for the sake of ...
I am telling you straight, find the fighter habit and learn to work beside it, experience will widen and life will flow more.
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 _  🧠_ 
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kaiowas
lest we baguette
Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,501
Loc: oz
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4602579 - 08/31/05 05:12 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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you don't need to do anything to be "complete" that's just a label you're putting on yourself. You are complete now as you were before. Completeness doesn't depend on what you do, but rather that you just are. you are here and therefore are complete.
the idea of worth is a defention in your own head. It wouldn't really make sense for me or anyone else to tell you what is worth doing, you have to do that yourself. we do have animalistic needs such as food and shelter and thus have to go do things in order to survive. The rest is up to you.
ask yourself, what is it you want to do the most. Then ask yourself why you want to do so.
if you find yourself going in lots of circles, stop the mind for a second, relax, breathe in some air, and know that things are ok.
I hope you get some sleep!! 
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Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.
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CosmicJoke
happy mutant
Registered: 04/05/00
Posts: 10,848
Loc: Portland, OR
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: redgreenvines]
#4602607 - 08/31/05 06:01 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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perhaps your very ideas of this ideal self, filled with passion, that you wish to become is a shallow motivation that feels empty and hurtful. how could you come to see what are empty pursuits of props for the ego? you will have to discover ways within each day to nurture yourself. if you start your day off with a shower, it could be as simple as finding out which soap feels best against your skin. to connect with yourself through such a simple pleasure would deepen your sense of pure intentions. after all, they are your greatness - they ready and ripen you with fascination and curiousity and eagnerness towards all those things you'd really like to try.
blessings,
CJ
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Everything is better than it was the last time. I'm good.
If we could look into each others hearts, and understand the unique challenges each of us faces, I think we would treat each other much more gently, with more love, patience, tolerance, and care.
It takes a lot of courage to go out there and radiate your essence.
I know you scared, you should ask us if we scared too. If you was there, and we just knew you cared too.
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moog
Stranger
Registered: 02/15/05
Posts: 1,296
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4602652 - 08/31/05 06:43 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Are you saying curiosity is not a good reason to do something?
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Gliders
Oh, hello!
Registered: 08/29/05
Posts: 284
Last seen: 17 years, 3 months
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4602781 - 08/31/05 08:10 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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I tried replying to this earlier, but my computer shut down. I took that as a sign that I should take a different approach. : )
Perhaps what you're identifying is the need in some people to jump from experience to experience without integrating it or "going deep." These are people who's consciousness skips like a pebble over a pond, never actually sinking into the water. They are restless, always looking for the next thing to make them happy, and it never does. Is that what you are referring to?
That being said, experience is pretty much the only valid reason for doing things in the long run. What are the other reasons people might give? To gain status, to conform to societal pressures, to feel secure? Even if you dig deeper into these ideas you''ll find a need to experience, such as a person opening a 401K to experience a feeling of security.
My question is, why is this causing you to cry in the night? Are you the one who needs to experience, or are there people close to you that are causing you pain and using the "experience" line as a way to justify it? .
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crunchytoast
oppositional
Registered: 04/07/05
Posts: 1,133
Loc: aporia
Last seen: 17 years, 20 days
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4603333 - 08/31/05 10:57 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Am I just misinterpreting when people provide this explanation?
i dont think so
Are experiences, on their own, a reason to explore people, ideas, things? Is everything worth exploring even if you don't have prior interest or passion in it?
it's the interest or passion that makes it worth exploring IMO
so you try things to experience it and see if it will give you this passionate feeling or not.
IOW you try things only to realize that when you believed you wouldn't be passionate about them, you were right
a person can be curious- that's a valid reason. if you're not curious, it's not your bag.
a person can seek experience for status "i just got laid last night" -status is a valid reason IMO, but only if that's what you're passionate about.
if experience for experience's sake makes you feel empty, why not trust that feeling?
as an aside, i can't count the number of huge mistakes i would have saved myself from, in my life, if i had only trusted my feelings.
but maybe this is something a person can only learn through ...experience.
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"consensus on the nature of equilibrium is usually established by periodic conflict." -henry kissinger
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LittleBen
Feed Me A StrayCat
Registered: 08/31/02
Posts: 202
Last seen: 16 years, 10 months
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: crunchytoast]
#4603347 - 08/31/05 11:02 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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My friend put lemon juice in his eye to experience it on mushrooms. He is very passionate. I eat fruit rollups because I enjoy it but I dont consider myself passionate about them. I dont take jobs I dont enjoy. Its a waist of my time. Sometimes you are forced to do things you are disinterested in. Work to remove it from your life, if you are passionate about that task you will succeed.
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Gaia, as you awaken, I heal myself. As I awaken, you are healed.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,172
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: LittleBen]
#4603394 - 08/31/05 11:14 AM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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there is a difference between being horny and being passionate.
some philosophical ruse's are basically pillow talk.
basically:
boink me and I will enlighten you etc.
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_ 🧠_
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shpongled1
Shroomer
Registered: 08/04/05
Posts: 79
Last seen: 18 years, 7 months
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: redgreenvines]
#4603725 - 08/31/05 01:02 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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When you think about it, all we have are experiences. That is what life is. So, to me it makes sense to do things purely to experience them. More experiences give you a broader field of view of the world, to me that is valuable.
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"Why not?"
-Last words of Tim Leary
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longtimegone
Isis Luna
Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 9
Loc: Colorado
Last seen: 13 years, 4 months
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4603779 - 08/31/05 01:12 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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I have found myself wrapped up in the same feelings and thoughts. It reminds me of tim leary's idea (and plenty of other people's, i'm sure) that all things and energy tend to ebb and flow. Sometimes, there is a fantastic flow of energy and I have great passion and interest in a variety of things. Sometimes however, "energy" tends to ebb out of my life and I have very little passion or interest to take part in actions. The ebb and flow seems to not really be in my control. So, I attempt to enjoy each state (ebb/flow) for all that each entails. I guess I am saying that sometimes it makes sense for me to experience things for the sake of it and other times it makes no sense... it all just depends on the circumstance.
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Jaimie
Stranger
Registered: 08/14/05
Posts: 87
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 20 days
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4603798 - 08/31/05 01:17 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Everyone is so helpful. Thank you! 
redgreenvines: Thanks for your advice, you're absolutely right. I am a fighter and it's really hard to stop. Your post reminded me of that Fiona Apple song Shadowboxer. I've always related very strongly with that song.
You made me a shadowboxer, baby
I wanna be ready for what you do
I been swinging all around me
'Cause I don't know when you're gonna make your move
After being hurt so many times, it's so hard not to fight...to protect myself. I feel like while I've let people deep into my heart, I've only been perched on the surface of their skin. It'd definately be easier to not fight if everyone I met were as kind and helpful as the people here.
Gliders: Yes Yes Yes! Those are the people I'm talking about, always on the move, never satisfied. They never have enough money, a nice enough car, a hot enough girlfriend, enough friends, etc etc. Being in their presence makes me feel like part of their "collection". I feel worthless, degraded and maybe useful, but of course, only for a brief moment.
Yes, it's usually the justifications of others that really hurt me. If they were open and honest from the beginning, I guess it wouldn't be such a problem, but it seems like people can be really manipulative and deceptive when they are striving for experiences. Like with friendship or a relationship, it feels like those who strive for the experience are only worried about themselves and not the love and joy that you can share with them. That really hurts me and I don't know how to get beyond it.
Thanks for your help
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MushmanTheManic
Stranger
Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 4,587
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4604027 - 08/31/05 02:19 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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I enjoy exploring, trying new things, and usually try to push myself past some insanely irrational 'limit'. But, if I couldn't share these experiences, or at the very least, communicate them to others I'd be very depressed and lonely. Its sort of like Epicureanism mixed with the Merry Pranksters.
The person you are describing sounds like some Laveyian/Objectivist asshole. Empathy is one of my favorite experiences.
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Gliders
Oh, hello!
Registered: 08/29/05
Posts: 284
Last seen: 17 years, 3 months
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4604259 - 08/31/05 03:34 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Since these people leave you feeling used, as though you're just another "experience" to them, perhaps it's time to leave them behind. Apparently you've either grown enough to see them for what they are, or you've always been able to see it and haven't given yourself permission yet. It may be time.
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Jaimie
Stranger
Registered: 08/14/05
Posts: 87
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 20 days
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Gliders]
#4604271 - 08/31/05 03:38 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Oh hahaha...I never have to leave them behind, they always beat me to it. 
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Gliders
Oh, hello!
Registered: 08/29/05
Posts: 284
Last seen: 17 years, 3 months
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Re: Doing things for the sake of experience? [Re: Jaimie]
#4604328 - 08/31/05 03:56 PM (18 years, 7 months ago) |
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Next time, just let them go on their merry way.
Reminds me of a line from one of my favorite songs:
I wanna see their
faces turn to back of heads and slowly get smaller...
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