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I say do your work here, let the departed rest, you can still love them and enjoy the life that is shared.
Several psychonauts here at have had an experience of being a book (on salvia) - many pages, and a sense of wonder first hand.
When a good friend or family member's book is taken off of the shelf from this living library not to be returned, we sense very strong tugging against the spine of our personal book. But we do not let those pages with the memories of shared experiences get torn out too, ragged and stressed -yes; the tugging makes us stronger if we let it; those memories become stonger, those pages revisited with humility.
It is not necessary to have a huge metaphor, but this one helps me with grief, and later with gentle feelings, contradicting no science or philosophy.