|
Some of these posts are very old and might contain outdated information. You may wish to search for newer posts instead.
|
JEDI
Stranger
Registered: 07/17/05
Posts: 83
Last seen: 16 years, 8 months
|
fear
#4441160 - 07/23/05 01:26 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
i have feelings everyday that i have ruined my life on drugs. ive basically entered the unconsciousness conscious way of thinking or what others call altered perception. i feel like ive entered in the back seat, and im watching myself live life, a life i have no control over anymore. some days i'll feel like, lets go smoke pot! then the next day im like.. dude i need to stop. i deal with depression on a daily basis. so im basically consulting therapy on these forums. me thinking these thoughts fucks me up mentally, emotionally, socially, and physically. im also gaining weight and i hardely eat anything anymore, probably some fucked up chemical change in my body from drugs. please help me out.
yeah, and its wierd to think about something. ive noticed before i smoked pot often i used to have an emotional feeling toward everything in life. everything in life seemed like it had a certain mood, something i could define it as. now, everything has no mood. it fucks with my head.
Edited by JEDI (07/23/05 01:34 AM)
|
MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
|
Re: fear [Re: JEDI]
#4441336 - 07/23/05 02:05 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Dear JEDI,
You are not out of control of your life, but you may need to give up all control to realize this. Why do you feel out of control right now? What is happening in your life to make you feel this way? To be honest, we are *never* in control of our lives. That's just how it works. Any time you "thought' you had control was an illusion.
You never had control, my friend.
It can be frightening to realize this, I know.
Why do you feel you've ruined your life because of drugs? Could you elaborate on this for me?
It seems to me that you are reacting to drug-induced changes in fear. You say you are watching yourself live life. I have to ask, why is this "bad?" What is wrong with becoming a passive observer of your own life? This is my goal as a person, to give up all control and BECOME that observer. That is what I'd like to do.
Sounds like you're already there. But what are you doing with the opportunity? If you don't like the way your life is...CHANGE IT.
It's as simple as that. You're gaining weight? Work out. Mix things up a bit. Try to get involved in a new hobby.
What I find intersting about modern psychology is that they act like depressino is a new thing. It's not! Feeling depressed from time to time is a part of life. The most important thing to do in these trying times is to MOVE. Move your body, shake up your existence a little, give yourself something to live for. I'm sure you have some hobby or goal you've thought about getting involved in, but haven't yet. This may be the time to do it!
Now, it could be you might need a boost! If you are truly suffering, you may gain a lot from therapy or medication. Don't take chances, risks or settle for less with your life! This is YOUR life, do your best to make it everything it can be. If that means getting professional help with your depression, then go for it. The Shroomery will do our best to help you with your tripping/drug related needs, but in the end, it's up to you to make a difference for yourself.
Remember you are the steps you take! You can make the change in you. If you aren't satisfied with your life, only you can make the difference. The best part is that you *can.* You just have a bit of courage in yourself to allow the change to happen.
Could you elaborate on your situation? What do you feel that drugs have done to "ruin your life?"
|
JEDI
Stranger
Registered: 07/17/05
Posts: 83
Last seen: 16 years, 8 months
|
Re: fear [Re: MOTH]
#4441550 - 07/23/05 03:05 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
elaboration: im scared of living in unconsiousness. i wonder what its like to have never done drugs ever, how i thought, felt, and the moods and feelings i used to have in life that now no longer exist. its basically how i view life and how my perception on reality seems so 3rd person and linear. im scared at living this kind of life now. its depressing. i would try new hobbies but then life becomes dull without drugs and its due to the changes in my brain
Edited by JEDI (07/23/05 03:06 AM)
|
fredyjenkins
Stranger
Registered: 10/30/04
Posts: 127
Last seen: 7 years, 3 months
|
Re: fear [Re: JEDI]
#4441629 - 07/23/05 03:37 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
I once was in the same kind of situation as you are in right now. There is only one advice to give really : stop using drugs on a daily basis. You'll see, in 3-4 months you'll feel alot better ; more in control of your life. Of course it's easier to smoke all night at stare at a computer screen than do what you HAVE to do in life. I dont know your situation at all, but when drugs became an escape, and you feel like you're wasting your life away.. It's time to stop, be it marijuana or heroin. lol
Since i stoped i became a undergraduate math student, i found a grilfriend, and my living area is alot more clean than it was haha
-------------------- -English is not my native language. So im not retarded, i'm just not very engligh articulate. Please forgive me for my bad writing! Thank you!
|
MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
|
|
Quote:
fredyjenkins said: but when drugs became an escape, and you feel like you're wasting your life away.. It's time to stop, be it marijuana or heroin.
Well said. Living life should always come before drugs.
I will reply more in depth tomorrow when I am not so drunk, lol.
|
louis_last
Stranger
Registered: 07/18/05
Posts: 27
Last seen: 18 years, 8 months
|
Re: fear [Re: MOTH]
#4441781 - 07/23/05 05:22 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
garden state
|
redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,062
|
Re: fear [Re: JEDI]
#4441869 - 07/23/05 07:06 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
get a pad and pen carry them everywhere when you fill it get a new one write down the date and time every time you start. write down your observations: flow onto paper in ink. become the mirror and your own muse. heal by being interested
-------------------- _ 🧠_
|
Newbie
User of semicolons.
Registered: 07/18/04
Posts: 24,715
Loc: SoCal
Last seen: 1 hour, 58 minutes
|
Re: fear [Re: JEDI]
#4441875 - 07/23/05 07:10 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
I know exactly how you feel, it's mostly the acid/shrooms that did that to me, but what you need to realize is that when you take drugs like that, you're sort of enlightened. You can stare facts in the face that you didn't really know existed. It's this over enlightenment that may have you kind of freaked out but try to think of it as that, not fucked-up-ed-ness. You basically have a different view on things, not a messed up head. Just relax and realize you're not alone.
|
HuckleBones
Danger Bones
Registered: 06/16/05
Posts: 385
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
|
Re: fear [Re: Newbie]
#4442885 - 07/23/05 12:10 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Last time I took mushrooms I realised that car accidents aren't funny. I was almost planning on moving away from roads and going "up the country" but I couldn't get anyone to come with me.
-------------------- Manitou
|
Plok
Life is fractal
Registered: 09/08/04
Posts: 1,152
Loc: Los Angeles
Last seen: 25 days, 15 hours
|
|
Quote:
redgreenvines said: get a pad and pen carry them everywhere when you fill it get a new one write down the date and time every time you start. write down your observations: flow onto paper in ink. become the mirror and your own muse. heal by being interested
This is good advice. I don't think it's the drugs that did this man. It sounds like something else in your life is missing, something isn't right, and perhaps you use drugs to escape that. I don't think drugs cause emptiness... making drugs your entire life causes emptiness.
Drugs in and of themselves have no value, they are merely a condiment to life. When you make them the main course, you are in trouble.
Depression is a serious malady, and if you truly suffer from it, then do not take that lightly, and certainly do not let others convince you that you do not have it, or are being a baby. If you truly have depression, then you need to begin therapy or at least an open dialogue with someone you trust wholly. I wish you the best.
-------------------- Just say NO to the War on Drugs.
|
Simisu
taken by gravity
Registered: 08/08/03
Posts: 5,435
Loc: Israeli in
|
Re: fear [Re: JEDI]
#4444832 - 07/23/05 09:48 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
JEDI said: i wonder what its like to have never done drugs ever, how i thought, felt, and the moods and feelings i used to have in life that now no longer exist. its basically how i view life and how my perception on reality seems so 3rd person and linear.
i too have thought about this a few times... but i think it's just growing up you're talking about! when i was 18 drugs were just a passtime they no longer are! it takes a whole new meaning when you grow up...
life are certenly not dull! you just have to own up to what you do (even if it means realizing you're deep in shit (depressed or more likely bored) or realizing you're not at all satesfied with the person you've become) and when you take the responsibilety for your actions you kinda realize that it doesn't matter what you do as long as you really mean to do what ever it is you DO
so yeah it sounds to me as if you're growing up and it's time to take control... don't blame the drugs... like it's been said drugs are a spice not the meal and you must become the sheff
redgreenvines also has a good idea which might help you realize what it is you're really botherd by...
change is slow and it's kinda like being a baby again but we're here... we might as well make the most of it!
good vibes mate
-------------------- Shrmery Visit & Support Free Spore Ring Earth Please help spread live Salvia Divinorum
|
|