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OfflineDead Shaman
enthusiast

Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 172
Loc: Unknown
Last seen: 22 years, 1 month
What is it your searching for?
    #441971 - 10/30/01 01:32 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

All the kings horses, and all the kings men, are all long and dead. So where do they end, and you begin?

Edited by Dead Shaman (10/30/01 02:06 PM)

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OfflineDead Shaman
enthusiast

Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 172
Loc: Unknown
Last seen: 22 years, 1 month
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #442057 - 10/30/01 03:05 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

What is worth living for? What is it that is so valuable that you would give your life? Is there such a thing as worth? When we are all slaves to neurochemical surges, where lies the separtation of insanity and reason? Truth and imagination? Would you prefer to live your life a dream, admist the warm comfort of your desires, or would you rather face the cold harsh existence of knowing your own demise is only around the corner.

Sometimes I often believe my rage will reach such staggering heights that my soul, my very being will instantly transcend human desires and I will be forever transformed. Unfortunatly reality provides no such escape, and I remain trapped. Trapped amongst the dogs who ravage my very flesh at every oppurtunity. My mind is in constant flux, constant turmoil, I realize I am not the person I think I am, Am I? I can't even trust my own judgement. In time, my senses will soon fail me, and I shall perish like all those who have came before.

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InvisibleIn(di)go
People of the sun.
Male User Gallery

Registered: 10/29/00
Posts: 8,157
Loc: Cologne, Germany
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #442090 - 10/30/01 03:31 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

life is the purpose itself...


--------------------

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OfflineElvish
enthusiast
Registered: 10/18/01
Posts: 264
Last seen: 18 years, 8 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: In(di)go]
    #442669 - 10/31/01 12:33 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

..sounds like a porn site..."dogs ravaging my flesh".
sorry you feel so ....ravaged though.


>there is more to life than this....<
>and this...<

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OfflineFelstorm
member
Registered: 09/11/01
Posts: 105
Loc: North, Cold North, Very C...
Last seen: 22 years, 27 days
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Elvish]
    #442693 - 10/31/01 01:01 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

ahem... the term is ravished... not ravaged....

"Honey... I'm gonna put on the barbwire condom tonight and ravage your pussy!"


--------------------



To do a thing and know no better is ignorance.
It is an act of kindness to educate the ignorant.
To do a wrong thing intentionally, is evil and wicked.





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Anonymous

Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Felstorm]
    #442763 - 10/31/01 02:15 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I don't even have a pussy and that hurt!

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InvisibleGlowing_Eleven
Stranger
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/20/01
Posts: 2,270
Loc: Chicago, IL
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Anonymous]
    #447311 - 11/05/01 12:38 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I don't know but im getting real tired

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OfflineI_AM_THE_WALRUS
addict
Registered: 08/01/01
Posts: 541
Last seen: 22 years, 1 month
Re: What is it your searching for? *DELETED* [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #447314 - 11/05/01 12:44 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

Post deleted by I_AM_THE_WALRUS


--------------------
TRIPLE DIPPED!?!?!?!

hey, kid.... you wanna buy some lsd?? -me

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Offlineastral_traveller
journeyman
Registered: 11/04/01
Posts: 60
Loc: Earth
Last seen: 22 years, 6 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: I_AM_THE_WALRUS]
    #447349 - 11/05/01 01:38 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

im searching for any fallen bud that may have landed on my floor near my computer.

cos im dry, all out, nadda bit left, nothing!, ziP! OMFG I NEED A CONE!

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InvisibleMy Third Eye
old hand

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 11/02/00
Posts: 641
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: astral_traveller]
    #447403 - 11/05/01 03:59 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

i know what im searching for..i just dont know why im searching for it..and it seems so far away.


--------------------
suddenly a flaming stealth banana split the sky
like one would hope but never really expect
to see in a place like this.
Cutting right angle donuts on a dime
and stopping right at my Birkenstocks,
and me yelping...Holy fucking shit!

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InvisibleGlowing_Eleven
Stranger
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/20/01
Posts: 2,270
Loc: Chicago, IL
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: My Third Eye]
    #447554 - 11/05/01 09:49 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I must keep reminding myself of this

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InvisibleIshmael
enthusiast

Registered: 10/28/99
Posts: 224
Re: What is it you're searching for? [Re: Glowing_Eleven]
    #447878 - 11/05/01 03:46 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

The point of all human searching seems to be the desire to find security, and the peace of knowing that you are secure. Everything else is a periphary element. Enlightenment is the process of weeding through the insulation of ego to discover the essential perfection of reality that our neurotic culture breeds out of us as children.

Ish

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InvisibleMy Third Eye
old hand

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 11/02/00
Posts: 641
Re: What is it you're searching for? [Re: Ishmael]
    #448086 - 11/05/01 07:04 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

"Everything else is a periphary element"

you speak the truth..


--------------------
suddenly a flaming stealth banana split the sky
like one would hope but never really expect
to see in a place like this.
Cutting right angle donuts on a dime
and stopping right at my Birkenstocks,
and me yelping...Holy fucking shit!

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OfflineAxiom420
ADDICT

Registered: 03/22/01
Posts: 202
Loc: in the forest, behind the...
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #448181 - 11/05/01 08:11 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

why is it that you assume that everyone is searching. maybe not everyone is, maybe some people have found what they never knew they were looking for and search no more.


--------------------
"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen."
- Albert Einstein

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OfflineDead Shaman
enthusiast

Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 172
Loc: Unknown
Last seen: 22 years, 1 month
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Felstorm]
    #448915 - 11/06/01 11:20 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

"ahem... the term is ravished... not ravaged...."

Ahahaeeem, urrggghhhh, ahhccgggggggg.... You might want to recheck your dictionary, why I would care I don't know?


Actually I based my assumption on my own beliefs and feelings, although I suppose it is quite probable that others, such as not myself, remain to be too grounded in conformist ideas and beliefs to ever concieve of a life or a world where anything is possible. Which reminds me of a saying, one which I used to abide by quite willingly, but my past, and my experiences have forever denied me of such an easy escape.

"Ignorence is Bliss"

And sadly enough it apparently remains true for some.

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OfflineD_Tox
Boddhisattva

Registered: 10/31/01
Posts: 239
Loc: Lab 23
Last seen: 21 years, 3 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #450467 - 11/07/01 03:55 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

i'm searching for a greater understanding


--------------------
-----------------------
D_Tox

to understand other people….to be aware
to understand animals….to be a decent person
to understand plants….. to be a refined individual
to understand the mushroom…to be enlightened

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Anonymous

Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: D_Tox]
    #450471 - 11/07/01 03:59 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)


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InvisibleAdom
Totally Nude
 User Gallery
Registered: 09/30/01
Posts: 10,877
Loc: Way Up North
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #450491 - 11/07/01 04:23 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

Nothing I enjoy being puzzled.

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Anonymous

Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Adom]
    #450545 - 11/07/01 05:03 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

"Every piece is a puzzle of its own." - Smack!

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InvisibleAdom
Totally Nude
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Registered: 09/30/01
Posts: 10,877
Loc: Way Up North
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Anonymous]
    #450602 - 11/07/01 05:51 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

So true, so true.

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OfflineGringoLoco
I spit in theface of peoplewho ain't cool.
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/08/01
Posts: 6,118
Loc: Monterey, CA
Last seen: 15 years, 2 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Adom]
    #450822 - 11/07/01 08:09 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

What is the point? Why are people running around with guns and bombs and pieces of paper with presidents on them? Why is it such a big deal that everyone spread their seed? Why do people feel the need to worship one entity? Why is the nature of the human race to be big?

I have the feeling something much bigger is going on behind all this, what it is, that is my quest.

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InvisibleAdom
Totally Nude
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Registered: 09/30/01
Posts: 10,877
Loc: Way Up North
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: GringoLoco]
    #450846 - 11/07/01 08:32 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I searched for truth for along time, the thing is if there was a great truth I don't think we are supposed to know, so I just admit I really know nothing and leave it at that.

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Offline~`Tursiops truncatus`~
enthusiast

Registered: 11/01/00
Posts: 105
Loc: CO... UsA
Last seen: 22 years, 4 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Adom]
    #451859 - 11/08/01 03:38 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I can't force myself to search for something I am not ready to be. When I am ready it will be.

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OfflineMAIA
World-BridgerKartikeya (DftS)
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Registered: 04/27/01
Posts: 7,396
Loc: Erra - 20 Tauri - M45 Sta...
Last seen: 4 months, 11 days
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: ~`Tursiops truncatus`~]
    #452746 - 11/09/01 11:01 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I'm allready it.
It's not what you search, all that matters is on what standpoint you look at things and search the reason for them to be. I still have much too learn but what i search is myself, but myself is allways moving when i learn so i have to search for myself everytime.

Peace,
MAIA


--------------------
Spiritual being, living a human experience ... The Shroomery Mandala



Use, do not abuse; neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy.
Voltaire

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InvisibleKid
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 07/21/00
Posts: 2,365
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #453180 - 11/09/01 04:55 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

There was a time in my life when everything seemed perfect. It was a set of circumstances, including interpersonal relationships, motivation, happiness, and time.

I'm searching for something which most people would say is impossible. I want those circumstances back, but I'd want to be aware that I had them back, instead of just going back and reliving it as though it were the first time.

I'm looking for something magical that I once experienced, which I don't seem to be able to experience again.

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Offlinegribochek
enthusiast
Registered: 04/18/99
Posts: 286
Last seen: 20 years, 2 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Kid]
    #454022 - 11/10/01 02:50 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I searched for the source of music,
but I was only bumping into the CD player.
I searched for the source of images,
but I kept staring at the TV screen.
I searched for where the thoughts were coming from,
only to keep pulling my hair out.
Only when I gave up looking,
did I find it.
It was hinding in the laugh of a three year old.

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OfflineBullfrog
enthusiast

Registered: 09/12/00
Posts: 52
Last seen: 22 years, 1 month
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #454418 - 11/10/01 08:35 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

DS,
Life in itself is the reason worth living. Try having a child when you get old enough and you will see what is worth dying for.
I see my own life thru my child. He's only 5 years old. I wish he would never grow older than he is now. The beauty of life is more apparent to a parent. To think that my own father thought the same way that I do now, amazes me.

As far as living in a dream? No one that is sane, does that. Life is harsh from it's inception.

You're just young, that's all. At 40 or so you'll see the light. The shroud of confusion is a side effect of youth. Keep true to your family, at least. Friends come and go. I lost my life long best friend to drugs 14 years ago. When I think of all that I've done without him, since his death, makes my own life and existence all the more treasured. The death of someone close opens one's eyes to the valuation of life.

I laugh when I hear young people who say "I'll never have kids, I'll never get married." I lived alone until I was about 31.
Find someone to cherish and you'll find happiness. People need another person to help them when things are'nt going well and someone to enjoy the things that one used to enjoy by oneself.

Give it time grasshopper, you'll be fine!

Bullfrog


--------------------
The bus came by, and I got on.......
|| Grateful Dead ||

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OfflineCrobih
rap-cord
Registered: 11/03/98
Posts: 2,015
Loc: cave
Last seen: 11 years, 8 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Dead Shaman]
    #454855 - 11/11/01 10:40 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I found out that LEARNING is the purpouse of life. As much as you learn that much you will use your life. There are two possibilities why we are here.
One is that we are here with no reason. That means that you can do anything you want ..aka hedonistic imperative. But after a whilie you can realise that you can not be happy for ever, even if you use drugs to gain that state. Because happiness is fluctuatig in your life as anything else. So it sucks.

Second possibility is that we are on this plane with some reason. Ifound out that the only thing we can use in our life with no need for dogmas (dogmas are allways her when the system is not working right) is LEARNING again. Trying to be good or soemthing else is not logical..so it is not possible to follow that path.

Shit, there is too many things I would have to say for backing my beliefs, but all in all.. it is all LEARNING, SEENING, KNOWING, FEELING of EVERYTHING (good or bad, black or white)

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OfflinegeokillsA
∙∙∙∙☼ º¿° ☼∙∙∙∙
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Registered: 05/08/01
Posts: 23,718
Loc: city of angels
Last seen: 5 hours, 46 minutes
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: Kid]
    #456217 - 11/12/01 04:49 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

In reply to:

There was a time in my life when everything seemed perfect. It was a set of circumstances, including interpersonal relationships, motivation, happiness, and time


kid, you've grabbed the thoughts from my head and written 'em down before i had a chance to

there was a time not so long ago in which i was completely content.  i was happy, i believed that i would continue to live my life in this way and with the people i was with and it would only get better as i gained more independence.  unfortunately everything has changed.  sometimes i hate change, but i realize there's nothing to stop it.  if there's one thing that doesn't change, it's the fact that everything changes.  this was a very harsh realization for me.  i've been mildly depressed since.  i don't know where i'm going.  i don't know what i'm searching for.  i guess an easy answer would be happiness.. but, that's an easy answer because i don't know how to start looking for it, so i'm actually searching for the way to find happiness.


--------------------

--------------------
··∙   long live the shroomery  ∙··
...π╥ ╥π...

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InvisibleKid
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 07/21/00
Posts: 2,365
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: geokills]
    #456425 - 11/12/01 07:56 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

In essence we're both searching for the security and happiness of a particular past.

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Invisiblefuzzysquirelnuts
veteran
Registered: 06/22/01
Posts: 1,150
Loc: souhwest us
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: geokills]
    #456533 - 11/12/01 09:27 PM (22 years, 6 months ago)

same thing as everyone else the answer to the eternal question......What is the matrix


--------------------
were all retarded sometimes

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OfflineTimeleech
addict
Registered: 10/04/01
Posts: 590
Loc: Norway
Last seen: 20 years, 9 months
Re: What is it your searching for? [Re: fuzzysquirelnuts]
    #456803 - 11/13/01 08:31 AM (22 years, 6 months ago)

I'm not as interested in *what it is* than *how to get out*.


--------------------
--
Eternally boggled, flummoxed, bewildered and surprised.
theophagy.org

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