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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Registered: 06/18/02
Posts: 3,546
Loc: SC
Last seen: 9 years, 13 days
Holy shit....i cant do it anymore!
    #4341186 - 06/27/05 12:37 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

so i went to my girlfriends house today. And i got cold and so i wrapped up in her blanket that i have used a thousand times and i actually gave it to her. And she starts being a bitch about it even tho she isnt cold. She sayed she doesent like people using her shit ... its an invasion of her space and blah blah blah.



now god damnit i know shes had the roughest life of anyone ive ever met but how the fuck and i supposed to deal with someone that just is a bitch about something so pety. Am i missing something? is there something im not uderstanding or seeing?


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Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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InvisibleRavus
Not an EggshellWalker
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Registered: 07/18/03
Posts: 7,991
Loc: Cave of the Patriarchs
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341205 - 06/27/05 12:43 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Who can fathom the female mind?

Is she like this all the time?


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So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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OfflineDrink_Punk_Soda
Now with ExtraVaganza!?

Registered: 06/14/02
Posts: 1,677
Loc: Nowhere fast
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341241 - 06/27/05 12:54 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Wait.. so she bugged out because you used YOUR blanket that you gave to her? Man..

And even if that isn't the case.. it's a pretty bad sign if she's that unwilling to share, not even give, something like that with you, her boyfriend. Unless this is a fairly new relationship. Either way, better to get to the root of the issue earlier than not if you plan to be together for a while.


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Kumbayah my lord, Kumbayah...

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OfflineVulture
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Registered: 06/18/02
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Drink_Punk_Soda]
    #4341258 - 06/27/05 01:00 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

no its not all the time. she has her moments...and i uderstand she has lots of issues...but i cnat help but get upset in situations like this...and when i get upset it gets all blown out of proportion and someonehow im the bad guy.


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Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341273 - 06/27/05 01:05 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Don't feel obligated to stay in the relationship just because "she has lots of issues." Consider your own happiness for a change. Is it worth it having to take care of her excessive emotional needs and walk on eggshells all the time 24/7 just so you don't risk setting her off to bitch at you?

Look, a healthy romantic relationship is a partnership between two equals. I don't have to look to hard to figure out who's getting the raw end of the deal in yours.

From your posts I can tell you're a nice guy. You deserve someone who respects you and treats you with kindness, not bitches you out over stupid, petty bullshit.

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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Registered: 06/18/02
Posts: 3,546
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: MOTH]
    #4341280 - 06/27/05 01:07 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

<3 I can tell your one of the rare ones.

thanks...ive been spending a lot less time over there....cause with me love is like i drug...i cant just quit cold turkey. And i think its working. Im slowly getting over it. But i know as soon as i do get over her she will be right there crying her eyes out talking about killing herself.  :shrug:


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Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341335 - 06/27/05 01:25 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

And you know what man...all you have to say is, "I'll not be held responsible for your actions," and walk away. 

It sounds like you're being held hostage in this relationship!  :crazy:

  If you think she's in real physical danger, tell her parents or call the police and make sure people know she is in suicidal crises mode.  I repeat:  you are not responsible for her actions. You are you, your own person, and when you die, you die alone.  I know you love her, but at a certain point you have to acknowledge that her behavior is harmful to both of you guys. 

Good luck...your situation incites me because I used to be like your girlfriend about five years ago, very miserably selfish.  Sometimes I didn't even realize when I was being cruel or hurtful to people.  If I hadn't changed my character and attitudes, I would not be married to the wonderful man I am with now. It took several wake up calls (and life-altering trips) before I started making efforts to change. 

I guess my question to you now is:  Do you believe your girlfriend will ever change? 

Some people can change, and some can't, or just aren't willing to.  I think you better reflect on which one your girl may be before you decide to break off the relationship. 

If you decide to stay with her, you need to send her a message.  Have you tried telling her how you feel about this topic?  Lack of communication is a killer of the majority of failed relationships.  You need to tell her how you feel about her behavior.  If she doesn't listen, or if she makes the entire conversation about HER again by getting all upset and dramatic about YOUR feelings, then you will know that this girl is not willing to work on your relationship issues. 

Good luck again, it's a tough situation but I believe one that needs to be looked at carefully.

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OfflineVulture
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Registered: 06/18/02
Posts: 3,546
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Last seen: 9 years, 13 days
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: MOTH]
    #4341380 - 06/27/05 01:35 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Well i wouldent have stuck with her if i didnt think she could change. I just think...she cant help the way she is...she got delt a bad hand at the start of her life. And god damnit i feel like she needs to be rescued or something. She says that with me in her life shes way better than she used to be...and that what her family tells me to.

When i confront her about her issues and helping her to get over them she always responds with hopeless remarks like she will never get over it and its impossible tog et over the things ive experienced and shit like that. My first step is to get her to understand that there is hope for her. But Im having a hard time getting through to her.

There is a lot about her/us that i might help to clear some things up a bit on how to get rhough...but i think i will save that for tomorrow cause i need a good amount of time to devote to typing all that lol.


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Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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OfflineDig_a_Pony
The MadcapLaughs
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Registered: 06/23/05
Posts: 160
Last seen: 18 years, 9 months
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: MOTH]
    #4341382 - 06/27/05 01:36 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Why don;t you ask her if she's feeling okay when she reacts irrationally like that?


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...
We can have some more
Nature is a whore
Bruises on the fruit
Tender age in bloom


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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Registered: 06/18/02
Posts: 3,546
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Dig_a_Pony]
    #4341412 - 06/27/05 01:41 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

sound like a good idea. i know today she was having abad day. she is WAY to attached to her cat and when he stay away from the house for more than a day she starts getting upset...sometime crying...and if its 2 days...shes screaming crying talking about how she doesent want to live without her cat.


it blows me away


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Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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Invisibleeligal
Noobie

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Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341443 - 06/27/05 01:49 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

maybe its that time of the month :confused:
jk jk

na, it does sound like your a hostage, not a good place. you gotta let her know that shes not acting right, and tell her how you feel about her and that she needs to check herself. even if youve had a bad life, which many people hav had, theres only so far you can take that as an excuse... i understand havin temper stuff every now and then, or lil flips, but a constant thing (like bein more than a day without her cat) its just nonsense...
honestly, with the cat thing, it sounds like she needs help, if you cant help her, possibly profesional...
a relationship should be because 2 people like eachother and what to be with eachother. not because one threatens her life for it... (but if she does take her life, that will be on your conscience for ever... it wouldnt be your fault, but it will be stuck in your mind, and you will never be sure whether it was your fault or not...)


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\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."


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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Registered: 06/18/02
Posts: 3,546
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: eligal]
    #4341458 - 06/27/05 01:53 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

eligal said:
(but if she does take her life, that will be on your conscience for ever... it wouldnt be your fault, but it will be stuck in your mind, and you will never be sure whether it was your fault or not...)




exactly

honestly tho...if she doesnt do it on aug 28th...she wont do it


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Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341460 - 06/27/05 01:54 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

What's on that day?

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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Registered: 06/18/02
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: MOTH]
    #4341483 - 06/27/05 02:01 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

her 20th b-day

apparently shes always said that was the day if there ever was one.


--------------------
Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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OfflineDig_a_Pony
The MadcapLaughs
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Registered: 06/23/05
Posts: 160
Last seen: 18 years, 9 months
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341584 - 06/27/05 02:19 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

People who are suicidal ...it could be at any time. It could appear completely random to you. This girl needs to talk to a therapist.


--------------------
...
We can have some more
Nature is a whore
Bruises on the fruit
Tender age in bloom


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341596 - 06/27/05 02:21 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Vulture said:
her 20th b-day

apparently shes always said that was the day if there ever was one.




I'm sorry man. :frown:  It must suck to be constantly stressed out about her welfare.

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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: MOTH]
    #4341621 - 06/27/05 02:28 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

yeah...i mean...i dont want to sound like a pussy or anything...but sometimes i just cry...cause i dotn know what else to do. Ive been doing good recently...but right now im kinda worked up cause of that whole shit tonight.


--------------------
Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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OfflineDig_a_Pony
The MadcapLaughs
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Registered: 06/23/05
Posts: 160
Last seen: 18 years, 9 months
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4341636 - 06/27/05 02:34 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Don't worry, it doesn't mean you're a female reproductive organ, it means you're a human.


--------------------
...
We can have some more
Nature is a whore
Bruises on the fruit
Tender age in bloom


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OfflineVulture
Pursuer ofWisdom
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Registered: 06/18/02
Posts: 3,546
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Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Dig_a_Pony]
    #4341900 - 06/27/05 04:23 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

hehe yeah.

what a night...drama...god damnit i hate drama. I so helpless when it comes to love.


--------------------
Work like you dont need the money.

Love like you never been hurt.

Dance like nobody is watching.

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Offlinediscoabe
Stranger

Registered: 03/26/04
Posts: 674
Loc: Nevada
Last seen: 18 years, 6 months
Re: Holy shit....i cant do it anymore! [Re: Vulture]
    #4342020 - 06/27/05 05:22 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Damn man, thats rough, but ofcourse you already know that. I really detest when people play the suicide card. Obviously it's a cry for attention at the least, and a cry for help at the most. Actual suicidal people very rarely mention to anyone that they want to kill themselves or even that they are depressed. One day someone just finds them dead and then everyone is all broken up trying to think if they missed signs of depression/suicide. I was in a relationship much like yours for way to long. I finally broke it off and desided that if anyone ever did shit like that ever again I would either:

a. call their bluff and see if they really do it
b. remove myself from the relationship all together.

That may sound cold and fucked up, partially because it kinda is, but I come first in my life, and I'll be damned if anyone else is going to fuck with that. You really need to put your well being ahead of anyone else's. I wouldn't hold on to her changing anytime soon either. People only change if they want to, if they don't want to there is nothing in the world that will get them to do/act things differently. I wish you good luck, and remember there are plenty of people here to talk to.

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