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InvisibleSwami
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Anger and Emotional Choice
    #4236467 - 05/30/05 01:45 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

A recent poster said we make little progress on these boards. The lack of progress is not due to the discusssions, but the lack of integration. People read and don't absorb or practice.

For years, I have "preached" emotional control; yet we are daily faced with the same outbursts; the same personal attacks; the same anger. If we cannot grow past this first grade hurdle, how can we go truly deep into spirituality?

Others "preach" meditation. Meditation is about control and awareness.

Anger is for most, an unconscious reflex usually triggered, not by what is going on, but by some internal projection. If it is a knee-jerk response, then that is the antithesis to awareness.

Sleep-walking is not a part of spirtuality; of being fully human; it is about being a conditioned robotic machine.

Wake up and break the chains! YOU CHOOSE YOUR EMOTIONS!


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The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleMOTH
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami] * 1
    #4236538 - 05/30/05 02:15 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Swami said:


For years, I have "preached" emotional control 




The Vulcans would love you.  :heart: 

Just kidding. 

The day I realized I could control how I chose to react to situations and people was a pretty good day.  I had been hearing "life is 10% what happens and 90% how you react to it" my entire life, but it took such a long time before I understood how true that saying really was.


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InvisibleSkorpivoMusterion
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4236635 - 05/30/05 02:55 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Swami said:

Sleep-walking is not a part of spirituality; of being fully human; it is about being a conditioned robotic machine.

Wake up and break the chains! YOU CHOOSE YOUR EMOTIONS!





Indeedilly doo. :thumbup:



--------------------
Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death, and sweet as love.


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InvisibleShroomismM
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: SkorpivoMusterion]
    #4236637 - 05/30/05 02:57 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

I control my anger :evil:


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: MOTH] * 1
    #4236663 - 05/30/05 03:07 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

The Vulcans would love you.
Many perceive control as the extreme of being totally non-feeling. Not true. I laugh easily, love deeply, cry at the end of romantic movies and write beautiful music.

The point is not letting triggered responses getting you to do or say things you would not consciously choose in a calmer moment. That is all.

I hear all the time, "Well, I have a bad temper. That is just the way I am." This is a lie they tell themselves to avoid responsibility and change. Frequently, it is a form of manipulation. "If I scare people with my outburst, they might acquiesce to my demands."

The day I realized I could control how I chose to react to situations and people was a pretty good day.
That is spiritual maturity.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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Offlineegghead1
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami] * 1
    #4236705 - 05/30/05 03:20 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Its not so much that you CONTROL your emotions, it more that you choose how you react toward them, and what you attitude is toward them. That's the main point. If you try to CONTROL your emotions you can actually do alot of damage to yourself mentally by attempting to suppress natural processes in the mind. Not getting lost in emotional states is the way forward spiritually, you still feel those emotions and feelings 100%, but you aren't solidifying and buying into them as if they were something real, permanent and substantial. Spirituality for me is the non-act of gradually letting go of this illusion of control to gain insight and a better understanding of what is going on. Essentially there is nothing wrong with the emotions themselves, its just that our reactions and attitudes toward them are delusional when they remain unchecked through lack of reflection on their impermanent, unsubstantial nature.  :heart:


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All you need is Love! Really thats it! Infinite Unconditional Love! Just develop that and all else will fall into place perfectly!


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: egghead1] * 1
    #4236875 - 05/30/05 04:05 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

With practice, one may get to a point where neither choice nor control is necessary. This occurs by acknowledging and removing the hair-triggers, by understanding that events are not personal.


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The proof is in the pudding.


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Offlineegghead1
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4236986 - 05/30/05 04:32 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Swami said:
With practice, one may get to a point where neither choice nor control is necessary. This occurs by acknowledging and removing the hair-triggers, by understanding that events are not personal.




I don't know about that Swami, i can think of many events in my life that have been deeply personal. But all events in life are impermanent, so as long as we recognize this and observe ourselves and our emotions carefully, we can come to a point where we can observe that fully and accept what is happening in that natural process and let go.

I think many people develop anger problems out of fear of that anger, they try to hide or run away from the anger itself, becuase they think that if they face it, its going to swallow them up, but the facts are that running and hiding from this emotions only feeds it and intensifies the pain which is associated with the grasping mechanism involved.  If we can face all of our emotions directly, without involving our habitual tendencies of grasping and attachment, through the clear recognition of the impermanent nature of apparent phenomena, the emotion itself no longer appears as an enemy or something that we need to separate ourselves from, instead we see clearly, as it is, just a naturally liberating movement of mental energy. Because if we observe the emotion carefully, we can see that there is a moment of arising, a moment of being, and a moment of dissolving. When we see this, our emotions no longer have any control over us

Seeing this directly is called insight. this insight gives us freedom from our habitual patterns in which we have no choice how we react, we are imprisoned by them, it just happens and we don't even notice what is happening due to our lack of awareness and reflection, then we can create all kinds of problem fro ourselves and others. So we need to move from a place of no choice, to a place where we have full choice, freedom and natural control over our emotions and actions.  :heart:


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All you need is Love! Really thats it! Infinite Unconditional Love! Just develop that and all else will fall into place perfectly!


Edited by egghead1 (05/30/05 05:08 PM)


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OfflineAlan Stone
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4237350 - 05/30/05 06:28 PM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

A recent poster said we make little progress on these boards. The lack of progress is not due to the discusssions, but the lack of integration. People read and don't absorb or practice.



Although I can see where you're coming from, the discussion in itself can detract from spiritual advancement. To me, at least, spirituality is about realising and 'feeling to be true' what you already knew. Raising new topics and asking new questions is good in se, but can detract from contemplation and observation of the self.

I myself have mastered my emotions to a great degree. I still have bad days, but they only come around once every year. I no longer relish in the bloodlust as much as I used to, so it has grown out of me spontaneously.


--------------------
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.

- Aristotle


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Alan Stone]
    #4238457 - 05/31/05 01:11 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Although I can see where you're coming from, the discussion in itself can detract from spiritual advancement.
You really lost me here, bro. We come to discuss. If topics catch no one's interest, they die out quickly. If many participate, but it is not to your taste, you are free to start your own topic or participate in the ones that hold interest to you.

Raising new topics and asking new questions is good in se, but can detract from contemplation and observation of the self.
Nothing stops anyone from turning off their computer and contemplating. As to self-observation, any post that creates a reaction is an opportunity for self-examination.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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Invisibleorechron
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4238496 - 05/31/05 01:24 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Discussion forums like this are great for examining your own beliefs. Present your views on a subject and watch them get bombarded from every angle.

One of my professors gives us two assignments with every paper we write. The first is the primary topic paper, the second is a shorter paper attacking the first. The grade is based on how thoroughly you understand the subject, not how well you can present one side of it.


--------------------
Live by the foma that make you brave, and kind, and healthy, and happy.


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InvisibleTroutmask
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: orechron] * 1
    #4238508 - 05/31/05 01:28 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

to me anger is just the result of fear which roots from the fact that we cannot control others


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Troutmask]
    #4238568 - 05/31/05 01:48 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Some of us cannot control others...  :wink:


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleeMotionALLmotion
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Emotional (un)Conditioning & Colors and Tonal Notes/Frequencies.... [Re: Swami]
    #4238585 - 05/31/05 01:53 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

I am thinking that there are ways to alter or calm ones emotions with sounds and colors....  I believe there is a link between all of it.... 

If you watch a sad movie with no music, it would not be nearly as sad as it would be with the sad music.... 

Why do they play "elevator" music in elevators....?  (besides to drown out a little fart :wink: )    I think they do it to calm and sooth some of the anxiety people sometimes feel from being in close quarters in a confined place.... 

I also remember studies of people listening to classical music when they read or study....  I *think* it was prooven to show a result of better understanding and retention of the studied/read material.... 


With colors, I remember seeing a scientific test/research on a show when I was a kid....  They had a body builder who was very consistant on his performances....  As he would do a specific set of exercises they would hold a large colored sheet of paper in front of him so he could only see that color....  I only remember one result....  When they held up the pink colored sheet, he could only do half of the set that he was normally able to do....  ---Then when they put up the next color HE COULD DO the set, completely....  Everything was consistant with rest times and such....

After I saw that, I was wondering why they wouldn't paint all of the jail cells of violent people pink, and play elevator music for them....  :shrug:


They call light bulbs of different color as "mood lighting"....  As you can say the same with "mood music"....  eMotions are something that I am striving to "figure out", and has always been a big interest of mine....  Now in my spritualistic studies, I have noticed a consistancy in the colors of the chakras being specific colors....  Then soon after I was looking up Tibetan Singing Bowls in my interest of spiritual growth....  Imagine my surprise when the individual natural notes of the Singing Bowls specifically coinsided with the chakras - and the colors of them.... 

It is my belief that expressions of music and art are expressions of mood/eMotion, and are all tied to specific colors and tones of ones internal emotional state/balance....  And one can "align" their own eMotional state to certain colors and tonal notes....  In this way, "perfect pitch" can be learned, and can be aided by visualizing the correct color/vibration/tone/eMotional relation....  I also believe that scents and taste are related to this, but I have not gone that far yet.... 

Perhaps we are all "off" (or at least the ones who have not mastered this ability) from being "in tune" and "in control" of our eMotional states....  We are conditioned in a seemingly world of chaotic sounds and colors....  Nothing is "in tune" for us to calibrate to - unless some effort is made to get "in tune".... 

I believe that when our "eMotional body" is in "proper tune", controling the eMotions are just one step closer to living a better life, as well as a more healthy life.... 


These are just my beliefs that I have surmised on my own....  I do not have any data to back ANY of this up, they are my growing "understanding" to what I have found so far in my study/intuitions on the subject....  Hopefully I will figure it all out one day, and make an "understanding breakthru" that may change the world for the better....!    :heart:


:sun:


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OfflineFrog
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4238609 - 05/31/05 02:01 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Good post.  I have been recently thinking about this, in light of the book I have been reading, "A purpose driven life" or whatever it's called.

If one can assume that there is a God watching us, and that He watches us not only for how we make do with what He has given us, but for also how we handle situations, then I guess He watches us when we become angry at others for perceived slights.

I am not a saint (yet :grin: ), so I am going to be working on this spiritual side of me:  The spirit in me that becomes pissed off when I perceive a slight directed at me.

Good point, Swami. 

I think that regardless of under what umbrella we are spiritual, all religions seem to promote a self-less, "love one another" philosophy.  How many of us practice that?  How often do we become angry at others, for whatever reason, even when unnecessary?


--------------------
The day will come when, after harnessing the ether, the winds, the tides, gravitation, we shall harness for God the energies of love. And, on that day, for the second time in the history of the world, man will have discovered fire.  -Teilard


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Offlinesoulmotion
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4238681 - 05/31/05 02:32 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

I agree that a person should learn to bridle their emotions, although I don't know if there's a single person in this world that can always have perfect control over their emotions in every circumstance.

The way I like to look at it, a person should always take responsibility for their emotions, which is to say: we should own up to our emotions. If we loose our temper or otherwise act inappropriately, we should acknowledge our fault, try to set things right, and exersize greater self discipline in the future.

We may learn to keep our emotions within bounds, but still I think everyone still has their 'flash point' (the temperature at which a given substance ignites). In the furnace of adversity and by the cool waters of temperance, we forge for ourselves a character of integrity.


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InvisibleeMotionALLmotion
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: soulmotion]
    #4238689 - 05/31/05 02:37 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

I have always heard "Take a DEEP breath and count to ten" before you react to something.... 
That could be good for some people to practice getting "control" of how they act/react in certain "heated" situations....
The calmer you stay in outword actions/vocally, sometimes the calmer the situation stays....


:sun:


--------------------
Uni-VersALL      MasterPeace
eMotive  :sun: Divinity NowThere Infinity :sun:  eMelody


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Invisiblegettinjiggywithit
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4238795 - 05/31/05 03:53 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Swami said; "YOU CHOOSE YOUR EMOTIONS!"



In the post I put up last week called CHOICES-INSPIRATIONAL you said,


Quote:

"Moods have MUCH to do with levels of serotonin and other neuro-transmitters. People are generally known to be more grumpy when sick or tired. Now why is that, if it is all choice?

"My entire family was wiped out by the tsunami? NP. Look at that glorious sunset!"

Uh-huh... "




Which is it swami? Do we choose our emotions or don't we? The two messages are inconsistant.


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Ahuwale ka nane huna.


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #4238834 - 05/31/05 04:32 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Good call.

Your CHOICES thread convinced and I changed my stance to agree with you. :thumbup:

Actually it is both. Ill-health, fatigue and extraordinary events can definitely affect mood. But what of "normal" daily events? What I am trying to convey is that recognizing and deleting trigger points enables one to remain more-centered.

Most all negative emotion is created by a discrepancy between "they way things should be be" (subjective) with "the way things are" (objective).

For example, I have been watching the French Open Tennis Championship. Some players accept the linesman's ruling as part of the game even when they go against the players. Agassi is a perfect example of this. He wastes no energy "fighting" the calls. Other players throw temper tantrums because the world doesn't cave in to their demand that everything go their way. Federer used to be this way; yelling and smahing racquets. He mastered this basic and now is #1.

This is not suppression; it is understanding and acceptance.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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Invisiblegettinjiggywithit
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Re: Anger and Emotional Choice [Re: Swami]
    #4238838 - 05/31/05 04:38 AM (11 years, 10 months ago)

Sweet on he considerations for both being at play! :thumbup:


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.


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