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OfflineGatorB
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Registered: 07/30/04
Posts: 233
Loc: Southeast Tennessee
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life)
    #4194480 - 05/19/05 08:01 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I'll preface this report by saying that I've tripped twice before. Both times were very introspective. Both previous times, I tripped on about 3.5 grams of cubensis, and my girlfiend (who I love very much) was with me. The first two were very enjoyable, peaceful, and safe.

This time, however, it was not. My buddy had never tripped. We both smoke pot every now and then, and he wanted to step it up and trip. He found someone who sold them and bought 1/8th for the both of us. When he told me this, I was initially disappointed. I had tripped on an 1/8th my first two times and was hoping for something stronger; a little extra edge this time.

I told him that it probably wouldn't be enough and we probably wouldn't feel much. Keep in mind, he had never done it, and I'd only done it twice. We both dosed, however, in my small apartment at about 6:45 or so. I chewed up my one dried mushroom really well and flushed it down with some Powerade.

(Some circumstances surrounding the trip: My girlfriend and I had been fighting the previous night but had fixed it before I began tripping. I had just got off of work. I'm not COMPLETELY comfortable around my buddy yet.)

Of course we didn't feel anything at first, so after a few minutes we decided to smoke a bowl (bad idea). He lit up and passed to me, and I took the deepest, most powerful hit I'd ever taken in my life. As soon as I took my hit, I felt it coming on. At first I thought it was the weed, but it was a combination of the weed and the shrooms.

So the shrooms started to go into effect in only about 5 minutes, and it hit me like a freight train. I don't understand why they came on so fast when the previous two times it took a good half hour or more.

I told my buddy I needed to go outside because I needed some fresh air. I went out on my deck and watched the world spin. I kept telling myself, this HAS to be the weed, not the shrooms. I almost fell off my second-story patio too.

I eventually came back inside, and by that time the shrooms had started to hit my friend (about 10-15 min. after dosing). These MFers came on fast.

He thought he saw shit floating around in the air and thought he saw shit on his face. He kept screaming to get it off. He went into my bedroom and looked in the mirror and calmed down when he saw that nothing was there. He started to call people on his phone and tell them how happy he was.

I started spiraling out of control, however. I tried to concentrate on one thing; I couldn't. I can't explain to you how fucked up I was. Many of you I'm sure have been there. I felt like my mind was being cleansed of all the imperfect shit I'd put in it.

A million things were running through my head. My apartment started to lose all its dimensions and become one with the outside. Time ceased to exist. I felt things and saw things that I had seen in dreams before.

I felt like because I had disrespected the power of the mushrooms (by saying we wouldn't feel anything from that "baby" dose) that I was being subjected to some serious shit. As if the mushrooms were saying, "How do you like me now? Do you think I can't fuck you up NOW?" By that time I just wanted it to stop.

My girlfriend eventually came over. She knocked on the door but hid out of view of the peephole. This totally freaked me and my buddy out. I asked him if he'd invited anyone over and he looked scared as shit and said no. I seriously thought it was the feds and they were ready to bust down my door. I didn't want a scene so I opened the door to "surrender" myself. Then, out from behind the corner popped my girlfriend, big cheesy smile on her face. I was too fucked up to get mad, so I just told her that she freaked up out big time.

From that point on, it went downhill. I don't really remember much. I went and sat on my couch and all these thoughts went through my head. I just can't even explain it. I felt as though I was being fucked with by the shrooms. I felt like I was in over my head. Like I shouldn't be doing this shit. I wanted to die. I've never felt such despair. I wanted the trip to end so bad.

I felt so depressed and full of despair. I felt like there was no hope for me. I literally thought I was travelling to hell and that I would spend eternity there. I seriously considered killing myself. I realized that my reality had been destroyed and that I couldn't tell what was real anymore. I thought that everyone - my parents, my relatives, all my friends - knew what I was doing and I was in deep shit with everyone.

By this point it was a struggle to converse with anyone. I had to keep my eyes focused and remain alert because if I didn't, I would have died. I seriously would have. I had to use the bathroom several times and at one time, I swore to God that I would never use shrooms again. I thought everything was over for me and that I was doomed to hell forever.

I could feel the inside of my body just like I could feel the outside. I could feel my stomach trying to wretch, I could feel my throat, I could feel all my inner organs.

Eventually my buddy's girl came over. I think what we were doing freaked her out, cause she just kind of sat there with a serious look on her face. But then again, I don't know. My perception was fucked up beyond reality. Eventually they both had to leave. I don't remember much of what was said while they were here.

Finally my buddy left. I think I was pissing him and my girlfriend off because I was being paranoid about people hearing what we were doing. He went out into the parking lot and called his girl and kept opening his trunk and slamming it shut. He kept throwing shit around. I went out with him and tried to get him to stop. People were around and I was scared of what they'd think.

Anyway, he took off and I came back inside. I felt like I couldn't get comfortable; my heart was racing, I wasn't satisfied with the lights off, I wasn't satisfied with them on, I wasn't satisfied with the TV on, or off, I just couldn't get comfortable. I thrashed around for a good hour or so till I fell asleep. (Falling asleep while tripping is very, very strange.)

So now here I am. I'm getting rid of all my grow-op stuff. I've got a casing in the fruiting chamber that's going, and a casing of horse dung in the incubator that's going. I almost told everyone that I was growing while I was tripping; a serious no-no.

I'm getting rid of both my bongs and all my liquor. This shit is not for me. I didn't take it seriously enough, and it fucked my mind. I'll never touch another drug again in my life. This trip was so terrible I don't want anything to do with any chemical that messes with my mind. It's my own fault, however. There's no one to blame but me.

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OfflineQuantumMeltdown
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4194554 - 05/19/05 08:35 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

GatorB said:
I'm getting rid of both my bongs and all my liquor. This shit is not for me. I didn't take it seriously enough, and it fucked my mind. I'll never touch another drug again in my life. This trip was so terrible I don't want anything to do with any chemical that messes with my mind. It's my own fault, however. There's no one to blame but me.




Well if thats how you feel then good for you! For myself whenever I had an experience like you described I was always tempted eventually to test my limits again. This has caused me many a good times and many bad times and legal problems as well. Enjoy sobriety and if you are ever called back by the shrooms come back.


--------------------
-QuantumMeltdown

Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
  -Mark Twain

"The time has come the walrus said, little oysters  hide their heads, my Twain of thought is loosely bound I guess its time to Mark this down, Be good and you will be lonesome
Be lonesome and you will be free
Live a lie and you will live to regret it
That's what livin' is to me
That's what livin' is to me"
Jimmy Buffett

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Invisiblemathflower
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Registered: 05/14/05
Posts: 367
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4194682 - 05/19/05 09:24 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

GatorB said:
I'll preface this report by saying that I've tripped twice before. Both times were very introspective. Both previous times, I tripped on about 3.5 grams of cubensis, and my girlfiend (who I love very much) was with me. The first two were very enjoyable, peaceful, and safe.

This time, however, it was not. My buddy had never tripped. We both smoke pot every now and then, and he wanted to step it up and trip. He found someone who sold them and bought 1/8th for the both of us. When he told me this, I was initially disappointed. I had tripped on an 1/8th my first two times and was hoping for something stronger; a little extra edge this time.

I told him that it probably wouldn't be enough and we probably wouldn't feel much. Keep in mind, he had never done it, and I'd only done it twice. We both dosed, however, in my small apartment at about 6:45 or so. I chewed up my one dried mushroom really well and flushed it down with some Powerade.

(Some circumstances surrounding the trip: My girlfriend and I had been fighting the previous night but had fixed it before I began tripping. I had just got off of work. I'm not COMPLETELY comfortable around my buddy yet.)

Of course we didn't feel anything at first, so after a few minutes we decided to smoke a bowl (bad idea). He lit up and passed to me, and I took the deepest, most powerful hit I'd ever taken in my life. As soon as I took my hit, I felt it coming on. At first I thought it was the weed, but it was a combination of the weed and the shrooms.

So the shrooms started to go into effect in only about 5 minutes, and it hit me like a freight train. I don't understand why they came on so fast when the previous two times it took a good half hour or more.

I told my buddy I needed to go outside because I needed some fresh air. I went out on my deck and watched the world spin. I kept telling myself, this HAS to be the weed, not the shrooms. I almost fell off my second-story patio too.

I eventually came back inside, and by that time the shrooms had started to hit my friend (about 10-15 min. after dosing). These MFers came on fast.

He thought he saw shit floating around in the air and thought he saw shit on his face. He kept screaming to get it off. He went into my bedroom and looked in the mirror and calmed down when he saw that nothing was there. He started to call people on his phone and tell them how happy he was.

I started spiraling out of control, however. I tried to concentrate on one thing; I couldn't. I can't explain to you how fucked up I was. Many of you I'm sure have been there. I felt like my mind was being cleansed of all the imperfect shit I'd put in it.

A million things were running through my head. My apartment started to lose all its dimensions and become one with the outside. Time ceased to exist. I felt things and saw things that I had seen in dreams before.

I felt like because I had disrespected the power of the mushrooms (by saying we wouldn't feel anything from that "baby" dose) that I was being subjected to some serious shit. As if the mushrooms were saying, "How do you like me now? Do you think I can't fuck you up NOW?" By that time I just wanted it to stop.

My girlfriend eventually came over. She knocked on the door but hid out of view of the peephole. This totally freaked me and my buddy out. I asked him if he'd invited anyone over and he looked scared as shit and said no. I seriously thought it was the feds and they were ready to bust down my door. I didn't want a scene so I opened the door to "surrender" myself. Then, out from behind the corner popped my girlfriend, big cheesy smile on her face. I was too fucked up to get mad, so I just told her that she freaked up out big time.

From that point on, it went downhill. I don't really remember much. I went and sat on my couch and all these thoughts went through my head. I just can't even explain it. I felt as though I was being fucked with by the shrooms. I felt like I was in over my head. Like I shouldn't be doing this shit. I wanted to die. I've never felt such despair. I wanted the trip to end so bad.

I felt so depressed and full of despair. I felt like there was no hope for me. I literally thought I was travelling to hell and that I would spend eternity there. I seriously considered killing myself. I realized that my reality had been destroyed and that I couldn't tell what was real anymore. I thought that everyone - my parents, my relatives, all my friends - knew what I was doing and I was in deep shit with everyone.

By this point it was a struggle to converse with anyone. I had to keep my eyes focused and remain alert because if I didn't, I would have died. I seriously would have. I had to use the bathroom several times and at one time, I swore to God that I would never use shrooms again. I thought everything was over for me and that I was doomed to hell forever.

I could feel the inside of my body just like I could feel the outside. I could feel my stomach trying to wretch, I could feel my throat, I could feel all my inner organs.

Eventually my buddy's girl came over. I think what we were doing freaked her out, cause she just kind of sat there with a serious look on her face. But then again, I don't know. My perception was fucked up beyond reality. Eventually they both had to leave. I don't remember much of what was said while they were here.

Finally my buddy left. I think I was pissing him and my girlfriend off because I was being paranoid about people hearing what we were doing. He went out into the parking lot and called his girl and kept opening his trunk and slamming it shut. He kept throwing shit around. I went out with him and tried to get him to stop. People were around and I was scared of what they'd think.

Anyway, he took off and I came back inside. I felt like I couldn't get comfortable; my heart was racing, I wasn't satisfied with the lights off, I wasn't satisfied with them on, I wasn't satisfied with the TV on, or off, I just couldn't get comfortable. I thrashed around for a good hour or so till I fell asleep. (Falling asleep while tripping is very, very strange.)

So now here I am. I'm getting rid of all my grow-op stuff. I've got a casing in the fruiting chamber that's going, and a casing of horse dung in the incubator that's going. I almost told everyone that I was growing while I was tripping; a serious no-no.

I'm getting rid of both my bongs and all my liquor. This shit is not for me. I didn't take it seriously enough, and it fucked my mind. I'll never touch another drug again in my life. This trip was so terrible I don't want anything to do with any chemical that messes with my mind. It's my own fault, however. There's no one to blame but me.




sounds like the mushroom spirit kicked you in the soul.


--------------------
z(0)=pixel;z(n+1)=z(n)^2+c

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Offlinesyanesso
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Registered: 10/24/04
Posts: 377
Loc: Evergreen State
Last seen: 14 years, 2 months
Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4195101 - 05/19/05 11:27 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

GatorB said:
I'm getting rid of both my bongs and all my liquor.  This shit is not for me.  I didn't take it seriously enough, and it fucked my mind.  I'll never touch another drug again in my life.  This trip was so terrible I don't want anything to do with any chemical that messes with my mind.  It's my own fault, however.  There's no one to blame but me.




that soudns like one of those "4 hours of hell" type mushroom trips, iv'e been there, and let me tell you, i feel for you.

i strongly advise that you wait a little bit before getting rid of your stuff, because you might regret in a week, or a month, when you come to terms with what you experienced.  my advice would be to "loan" someone your bongs, therefore if you decide you do want them back, you can get them with no trouble, but if you decide never to touch the shit again, no harm done! thats what i would do anyway!
i wish you the best of luck in sorting this experience out  :mushroom2:


--------------------
make sure it bruises blue

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InvisibleGGreatOne234
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Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4195177 - 05/19/05 11:48 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

sounds like a typical bad shroom trip.

sometimes theyre good, and sometimes theyre bad.

that's why they call it "tripping". :smile:

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OfflineGinseng1
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #4196647 - 05/19/05 04:52 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Those trips happen.  I had one, but it was more crazy.  I still like shrooms, weed and booze tho, I just took the experience as "another human experience".  Now, I'll never disrespect the mushrooms like you and I did.  And I know that you won't disrespect them again either.

Now you know what you can expect if you're not prepared.
Whether you want to be sober for the rest of your life is up to you.  I look up to that.  :smile: :thumbup:


--------------------
Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...

Edited by Ginseng1 (05/19/05 04:55 PM)

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InvisibleMovingTarget

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Posts: 4,825
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4196681 - 05/19/05 05:08 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I experienced this too, I said I'd never take shrooms again for months, but yet I still came back.  Giving up alcohol is good :thumbup: and cutting down on the weed is also good.  Mushrooms are best taken very infrequently.


--------------------


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InvisibleMovingTarget

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Posts: 4,825
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: MovingTarget]
    #4196700 - 05/19/05 05:17 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

The next time I had an equally high dose, actually higher I think.  It was was easier to handle.  Still terrifying in places, and amazing.  God I've tried to describe the overwhelming trips so many times, and I doubt I'll ever get close.  The high doses while not easy, are still worth doing.

Sometimes I can't help but think that some people just can't get to that high level 4 and 5 on shrooms.  I certainly can't imagine anything higher, although dmt is supposed to be on another level, but then its a shorter experience, and on mushrooms I feel most of the peak is often forgotten :shrug:

edit: am drunk and ramblin.


--------------------


Edited by MovingTarget (05/19/05 05:19 PM)

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Offlineajna
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: MovingTarget]
    #4197503 - 05/19/05 09:09 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

it happens man, that's for sure. if you decide that it's not for you then you're probably right, but do wait a little before you make any hard decisions - a traumatic experience can effect you for a while after but you could well get over it.

my only 'bad' trip (although i wouldn't call any trip bad in the end) was when i too was expecting to underdose and be underwhelmed, and boy did the shrooms show me. i thought i was possessed by a demon for about 8 hours, and finally snapped out of it to find myself purched in the doorway guarding my 'cave' from whomever might walk past at 3am in the morning. i felt like a beast though. like my human form had devolved to some form of cave dwelling goblin.

it scared me at first, but i soon came to realise that i really had asked for it in a way. i woke the next day fresh, with the clearest mind i'd ever had, and i felt closer to the shrooms than ever.


--------------------


what i'm listening to: http://www.audioscrobbler.com/user/ajnachakra/

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InvisibleAsante
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB] * 1
    #4198212 - 05/20/05 02:01 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I tend to emphasize on these forums that 3.5gr of mushrooms is a very high dose as it can contain anywhere between 15-40mg Psilocybin, whereas the therapeutic ratio is 2-20mg.

For this reason I recommend newbies and veterans to learn to appreciate doses around 1.5gr, which is a good 8-20mg and should be kosher for most peoples tripping needs.

People generally laugh and throw rocks at me :grin:


You've had a trip in excess of 20mg Psilocybin, I can tell, and its been quite hard on you. Do not be worried: I myself have been hit at least as hard on less. Bad Trips can be uniquely excruciating, but in all likelyness you'll emerge with no problems whatsoever if you have integrated this trip properly.

The pattern is classic.
You've taken a very high dose of psilocybin and got flooded by sensations. This awoke two of the major fears one faces in classic bad trips, the fear that you have lost or are losing your sanity: fear of insanity and despair about being damned forever which mean you've indeed got hit by a big one by psychological standards.

Usually I myself get bad trips centering around the fear of dying on that very moment which is another of the great ones. Read my LSD tripreport called "Explorers in the further regions of experience" here or on Erowid to see me slip into, and out of, a granddaddy of a bad trip.

You're likely still shaken right now so take your time to come to your senses. You (were going to) throw out all drugs because at the mo you should indeed not use thgem because you're out of balance.

Once in balance again it's likely you may want to use drugs/alcohol again, perhaps even Mushrooms but the latter will likely take several months. Even if you are DEAD SURE you never want mushrooms ever again make sure to hold onto a sporeprint or other Psilocybe genetics so you might start from scratch if the desire to explore outgrows the trauma of having bitten off more than you could chew.

If you had problematic drug use now is your time to get rid of it. If you were a pot abuser (semi-daily use isnt always voluntary) or had a drinking prob then throw that bottle & bong far away. If it were no prob at all loan your bong collection to a friend for however long it takes.

In the ideal world a person occasionally indulges in the simple pleasures of say alcohol and/or cannabis and on rare occasion ingests a workable quantity of psychedelics.

Go easy on yourself. Yes, you wanted to get fucked up so the mushroom fucked you over instead. :wink: Don't kick yourself but take some quality time to get in peace again and do some thinking.
I want to urge you to click "BEST TRIPPING MANUAL" in my sig, download the PDF and print it for offline reading if you want to come to better understanding as to what it was you did and whether you'd like to do it again.

Take some time for yourself and chill. Evaluate the road you're walking in this life and whether it leads to where you want to go. This may turn out to be one of the most valuable turning points of your life yet, if you handle this well.


--------------------
Omnicyclion.org
higher knowledge starts here

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OfflineRedxRadioDJ
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: Asante]
    #4208694 - 05/23/05 12:13 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

hahaha i said "i will never touch another drug again" after my first trip and i just keep coming back for more,give it a couple of days and you will eventually want to again TRUST ME

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OfflineCaRnAgECaNdYS
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4209072 - 05/23/05 03:05 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Wow...that sounds very intense. I remember times when my mind was starting to get fucked...then I'd think about something important going on in my life and suddenly the trip gets better.
It's hard to pull yorself out of something so intense...but it can happen.
I'm sorry this turned out so bad.


--------------------

The secret to being funny is to say smart things stupidly, or is it stupid things smartly? Whatever..it's not rocket surgery...or something like that.

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InvisibleCowgold
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: CaRnAgECaNdY]
    #4209294 - 05/23/05 08:08 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Nice report, reminds me of what I forgot I was trying to forget.  :muppet:


--------------------
"You might not be aware of this, but there are a lot of dickheads on the Internet." - D. Wong

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InvisibleTODAY
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4210828 - 05/23/05 04:11 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I had a hell of a trip once Trip Report and i went through all of those mental games like you did. i told myself i was done with mushrooms forever because i never needed to be in the place i was again. i calmed down eventually and by the end of the night while sitting and reflecting i decided i wasn't done with the mushroom yet, i was still attracted to them and here i am today still experimenting w/ mushrooms (more responsible doses though).

i never say never, but if never is for you then that's ok.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

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OfflineGatorB
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: TODAY]
    #4211226 - 05/23/05 05:45 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Wow, thanks for all the words of support, guys.  I wrote this the morning after the bad trip, and I've already decided not to throw out all my stuff.  However, no more smoking weed while tripping and I'm limiting my weed-smoking to less than once a week (which is what it was).  I don't drink alcohol too much anyway.

Wiccan, your reply was very insightful.  I could empathize with much of what you wrote.  I will read your trip report and the trip manual you suggested. 

After speaking with my brother (an experienced tripper), I realized that the mushrooms brought a lot of things to the surface that I'd tried to supress.  A lot of issues that I needed dealing with.  In this manner, the mushrooms definitely helped me out.  It's amazing what you can learn about yourself from a bad trip.

Like someone posted, I was tripping "just to get fucked up."  The mushrooms fucked me up alright.  I have a newfound respect for the mushrooms because of this.  I will trip again but not for a while.  I need to work on getting some issues in order first. :cool:

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InvisibleDark_Star
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4211796 - 05/23/05 08:37 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

:thumbup: Great response, this newfound respect and deep intensions will serve you well in your future voyages as well as your life.  :laugh:


--------------------

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Offlineholio1
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: Dark_Star]
    #4212053 - 05/23/05 09:27 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

wow i can't believe how many others this happens to

hopefully, things will only progress from here, as they have for me
it took time, but as not only a drug user but also a person, i feel i have grown significantly since that trip. i guess it was like the trip was the spark i needed to light the fuse, and that just happened to be where it came from

sure my trip was definately different than yours in ways, but i still know all too well where you are coming from

just wondering, did you toss the grow? growing is too much fun...

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OfflineKalix
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: holio1]
    #4212862 - 05/24/05 12:54 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

  The hardest trips are always the most educational ones. I find what keeps fear from happening the best is loving acceptance. Whenever I'm sure the cops are sneaking around my house @ 3 AM, I send love to them, if I am shown things that frighten me, I don't fight it, but try to see an underlying message. Mushrooms have a very high level of awareness of what people need to see. Usually you don't want to see about half of what you should be seeing. Sometime the truth is ugly, and frightening. But the trips that are the weirdest and most psyche shattering, are transformative and educational too.
Another suggestion, maybe you should experiment more w/a spiritual train of thought. Partying is a duty bequeathed upon us by our very souls, but heavy psychadelic experiences are not for partying. They are for education. A big help in avoiding these major freak-outs for me, has been to not trip with other people. You are vulnerable when stoned on psilocybin to other peoples emotional problems, or just their insensitivity to your mind-state. The terror is easier to deal with, if you aren't surrounded by people you don't know too well, that make to much noise.
I'm glad you decided not to throw out your grow, but be careful, safe, and respect yourself. Remember mushrooms make it so you can't hide anything from yourself. Not even the things you rather would...
Peace and  :heart:


--------------------


My Unitarian Jihad Name is: The Shotgun of Sweet Reason

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OfflineTwister
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: GatorB]
    #4213096 - 05/24/05 02:46 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

GatorB said:
After speaking with my brother (an experienced tripper), I realized that the mushrooms brought a lot of things to the surface that I'd tried to supress. A lot of issues that I needed dealing with. In this manner, the mushrooms definitely helped me out. It's amazing what you can learn about yourself from a bad trip.





I'm glad you figured out that the most difficult trips are the ones that you need to pay the most attention to. I haven't used mushrooms recreationally in about 6 months. Lately I've been using them more as a "medicine". I've found that if there are any underlying negative issues that you need to deal with they will probably be brought up during the trip. I've also noticed that once these issues are brought up during your trip you can either fight them or just try and go with the flow even though it could get unpleasant.
Last fall I had a few trips that showed me some things I needed to deal with directly that I had earlier just pushed aside. When they were brought to mind in the presence of psilocybin I could no longer push them aside and instead they utterly owned my cognitive powers for about 3 hours. In the end I had come to terms with these issues and was able to deal with them pretty easily in the world of sobriety. Due to experiences like these I don't see myself using shrooms as a purely recreational drug for a long time. While I'm sure I could still have fun on them I would rather use them as a kick in the ass to better myself, for myself.
Good luck in your future voyages.

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OfflineDubSak
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Re: Trip Report: Cubes (worst experience of my life) [Re: Twister]
    #4216793 - 05/24/05 11:29 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Sorry your trip was bad. I have never felt THAT bad before but i definetly have had some messed up shit going on inside. like said before, wait it out before you throw your stuff away, but if in the end you decide that it is not for you, then dont sweat it. I am glad you posted this, I hope some people will read it and decide if they are up to it and are willing to take the risks without having to go through what you did. Best of luck to you and I am glad you are ok

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