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Ped
Interested In Your Brain
Registered: 08/30/99
Posts: 5,494
Loc: Canada
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Monogamy & Polygamy
#4191112 - 05/18/05 01:36 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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Recently I've found myself involved in a universally consenting bigamous relationship with two women. What are the moral ramifications of this? Previously I'd not have thought it possible to be in a loving relationship with more than one woman. But, much to my own surprise, I can say that my feelings for either woman are genuine and healthy, and are not based on sexual attraction alone, or on the obviously egoistic connotations of having two girlfriends. It does not seem as though my affection for one woman undermines that had for the other.
I am being naive? Is this too good to be true? Does anyone else have experience with this? Is there a contradiction between this choice of lifestyle and my choice of religion? Why is monogamy the culturally sanctioned standard? Why has our culture rejected polygamy? Feedback please!
-------------------- Dark Triangles - New Psychedelic Techno Single - Listen on Soundcloud Gyroscope full album available SoundCloud or MySpace
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Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4191160 - 05/18/05 01:49 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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Different strokes for different folks. I think its ludicrous to say it's only possible to love one person.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4191218 - 05/18/05 02:03 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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This sounds very healthy to me. You seem to live by high standards of ethical behavior, why would your religion interfere with that?
Good question about why monogamy is the sanctioned standard. I guess it has something to do with the government sanctioned religion of our culture.
Why too good to be true? You deserve all the happiness life has to offer. You have it because you can handle it.
It's good to see you posting again.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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newjon
Stranger
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Icelander]
#4191422 - 05/18/05 02:45 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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it may be that the majority of people are not capable of being in love with more than one person at the same time. Actually, i just realise how little sense that makes - do you not love your family? your close friends? perhaps *this* is the next stumbling block for humans. It doesn't have to be a case of "shag everyone and everyone shag you" (to put it crudely). As in, maybe the "swinging sixties" had the right idea, but went about it the wrong way...all that is needed is realisation that you can love more than one person. And of course, love doesn't have to lead to a full-on sexual relationship - after all, i doubt many (if any) of us here regularly have sex with family members
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story
Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4191425 - 05/18/05 02:47 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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"Does anyone else have experience with this?"
I wish! I always wanted a three way. Or do you keep your intimacy behind closed doors?
How do you decide whose "night" it is?
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
Edited by LunarEclipse (05/18/05 02:53 PM)
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Ravus
Not an EggshellWalker
Registered: 07/18/03
Posts: 7,991
Loc: Cave of the Patriarchs
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4191429 - 05/18/05 02:48 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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It's purely cultural. Other cultures, such as the Arabian culture, have long embraced polygamy for men, just like in the situation you're in now except they'd be two wives instead of two girlfriends. It's entirely possible to love more than one person at once, I'd even venture to say it's natural.
As a sidenote, do they know that they've involved in a polygamous relationship, or is that simply your knowledge?
-------------------- So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: newjon]
#4191432 - 05/18/05 02:48 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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Carefull what you bring up around here!
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story
Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4191442 - 05/18/05 02:51 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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oops duplicated
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
Edited by LunarEclipse (05/18/05 02:52 PM)
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gnrm23
Carpal Tunnel
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info at church of all worlds: [Re: LunarEclipse]
#4192386 - 05/18/05 06:16 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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-------------------- old enough to know better not old enough to care
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Droz
Love of Life
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Posts: 2,746
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Re: info at church of all worlds: [Re: gnrm23]
#4192406 - 05/18/05 06:23 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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CAW seems interesting, "the children of gaia"
-------------------- Evolution of Time.
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Alan Stone
Corpus
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Re: info at church of all worlds: [Re: Ped]
#4192449 - 05/18/05 06:37 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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If you are and have communicated with all persons concerned, what can possibly be wrong with it?
Territorial feelings are what inspired monogamy in my opinion. Most people can't handle their S.O.('s) not "belonging" to only them.
If you and your partners can, why not?
-------------------- It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. - Aristotle
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OldWoodSpecter
waiting
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4192478 - 05/18/05 06:46 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ped said: Recently I've found myself involved in a universally consenting bigamous relationship with two women. What are the moral ramifications of this? Previously I'd not have thought it possible to be in a loving relationship with more than one woman. But, much to my own surprise, I can say that my feelings for either woman are genuine and healthy, and are not based on sexual attraction alone, or on the obviously egoistic connotations of having two girlfriends. It does not seem as though my affection for one woman undermines that had for the other.
I am being naive? Is this too good to be true? Does anyone else have experience with this? Is there a contradiction between this choice of lifestyle and my choice of religion? Why is monogamy the culturally sanctioned standard? Why has our culture rejected polygamy? Feedback please!
It is perfectly moral in case both of them know about the other one and your love for each of them.
Even an opressive religion like Judaism alows it, even encouraged the old people to have many as wives as they wanted.
Polygamy is natural since it alows you to love and have sex with multiple wimen and add as many of them into your "harem" as you wish, providing you are ready to love them and treat each of them as if she is the only one. Adding wives just for fun and then forgetting them after a month or two and finding some more would be irresponsible I think.
You can all be one happy family.
Polygamy and Monogamy are just different flavours of sexual love and is suited depending on personality.
Some like warmth, fun and excitement of polygamy, some might prefer a more romantic "you and me" setting of monogamy.
To everyone accoarding to their preferences
peace
-------------------- I descend upon your earth from the skies I command your very souls you unbelievers Bring before me what is mine
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OldWoodSpecter
waiting
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Re: info at church of all worlds: [Re: Alan Stone]
#4192488 - 05/18/05 06:47 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Alan Stone said: If you are and have communicated with all persons concerned, what can possibly be wrong with it?
Territorial feelings are what inspired monogamy in my opinion. Most people can't handle their S.O.('s) not "belonging" to only them.
If you and your partners can, why not?
Why is it that people always accept one thing and in the process reject the other? Why not accept all?
-------------------- I descend upon your earth from the skies I command your very souls you unbelievers Bring before me what is mine
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Alan Stone
Corpus
Registered: 11/23/02
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Come again?
-------------------- It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. - Aristotle
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OldWoodSpecter
waiting
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Posts: 4,033
Loc: mountains and lakes
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Re: info at church of all worlds: [Re: Alan Stone]
#4192518 - 05/18/05 06:56 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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In my eyes you are somehow against monogamy as it is built on weakness
-------------------- I descend upon your earth from the skies I command your very souls you unbelievers Bring before me what is mine
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Alan Stone
Corpus
Registered: 11/23/02
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Loc: Ten feet up
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That's not what I said. I only said what the motivation was. Most people cannot handle three days of castigation. Does that make those that can better?
-------------------- It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. - Aristotle
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Hey does every one feel the same about two men with one woman?
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Alan Stone
Corpus
Registered: 11/23/02
Posts: 986
Loc: Ten feet up
Last seen: 18 years, 8 months
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Icelander]
#4192575 - 05/18/05 07:09 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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As long as all three (or more, if desired) agree on what the deal is, why not? The same goes if the relationship is made up of only two people.
-------------------- It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. - Aristotle
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raytrace
Stranger
Registered: 01/15/02
Posts: 720
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4193855 - 05/19/05 01:00 AM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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I can say that my feelings for either woman are genuine and healthy, and are not based on sexual attraction alone, or on the obviously egoistic connotations of having two girlfriends.
how can you confirm that to yourself?
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Psychoactive1984
PositiveCynicist
Registered: 02/06/05
Posts: 3,546
Loc: California, Monterey Coun...
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Re: Monogamy & Polygamy [Re: Ped]
#4193882 - 05/19/05 01:11 AM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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Are you being naive? -Nah, best of luck to you, hope it works.
Is this too good to be true? -Is it? It could always get better.
Is there a contradiction between this choice of lifestyle and my choice of religion? -What's your choice of religion? I live the religion called "life" so... anything goes provided I'm satisfied with it. I was raised, and born into it, it's the biggest religion I know of, and one truly worth believing in.
Why is monogamy the culturally sanctioned standard? Why has our culture rejected polygamy? -Glad you're happy with 2, I'd rather be happy with 1.
Popular culture prolly has rejected polygamy as it places less emphasis on a relationship by virtue of it spreading the sexual-social order around. Don't forget about what Jebus said, and more prominent ideologies that influence culture in its entirety.
-------------------- "Their is one overriding question that concerns us all: How can we get out of the fatal groove we are in, the one that is leading towards the brink?" Albert Szent-Gyorgyi "We may not be capable of eradicating the corruption of reason, but we must nevertheless counter it at every instance and with every means." Dan Agin "Politics is the best religion and politicians are the worst followers." -It's ok to trip as long as you don't fall. -Substance over Style. -Common sense is uncommon.
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