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MrBump
Third prize is you're fired
Registered: 10/01/02
Posts: 4,263
Loc: Denver, Colorado
Last seen: 4 years, 8 months
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Re: I hate you (a message to the human race) [Re: moog]
#4034800 - 04/09/05 04:03 PM (18 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
moog said: "it sounds to me like you have a paraniod personality disorder, i have had this problem too, mostly for many of the same reasons you described."
I am paranoid, and tend to think in very extreme terms. I think either someone has to love me or hate me, with no shades of gray in between. So if someone does something to hurt me, I hold it against them forever ("if they hate me then I'll hate them"). For years I thought everyone loved me. Then I realized I was wrong. I get hurt when people don't like me and I don't know the reason. I take it very personally. Lately I've been so paranoid that I thought everyone around me hated me, so I just hated them back. Why bother making friends with someone if they don't like me to begin with? I need to learn how to avoid this, and just not care. But yes, I'm paranoid. What should I do about this?
it can be a tough thing to overcome, for sure...therapy might help and admitting to your self that you have an overly-paraniod personality is a good first step.
i am not aware of any meds or pharms on the market that help w/ this problem.
jesus, in college days i would be so paranoid in social situations if i heard a group of girls (or people in general) laughing behind me, i would assume they were laughing at me. i can think of numerous delusional episodes like that....
whenever i was pushed into a situation were everyone i was meeting was a new face, i would not be myself at all for fear of saying something stupid and everyone thinking i was strange. I put up walls that didnt need to be there and didnt help one bit in protecting me b/c people just thought of me as the weird quite guy who doesnt say anything, anyways.
try a few things that seem to work for me sometimes:
SMILE! well, not like a grinning idiot or people will think youve got an erection or something perverted...but smiling will ease everyones tension and yours as well. just try it for a day..smile at everyone you pass on the street and you will be amazed at the positive vibes you get back.
try to be the first person to make the eye contact or to say Hello or to start a conversation...you probably dont do that very often so when people come up to you you immediatly think "whats this asshole want?!?!"
but, hey, sometimes you probably are right...some bitch is making fun of your new clothes or whatever, not thinking youre w/in earshot or youre not paying attention to her...instead of holding it in and walking away steamed that someone was ragging on you behind your back, confront them. Dont look to pick a fight but call them on their snide comments...most people fear confrontation and they'll back down. at least you'll feel better about yourself for standing up to that type of shit.
its hard to get over tho, it takes practice...hell, i met 17 new people today out on the soccer pitch. they were all good freinds w/ eachother and had been playing together for at least a few seasons and i was the new guy. i didnt exactly come off like the friendliest of people, but no one really reached out to welcome me either...i didnt hold a grudge tho...and i really doubt theyre sitting around right now going "boy, that new guy sucked today. or, he was a quite weirdo etc, etc." in the past i might have walked away thinkingthat and might not have ever showed up again. but thinking about what i'd miss out on (like playing my fav sport or possibly making some new friends later) keeps me from harboring those negative feelings.
maybe tho its my age, i think im coming out of the stage where i feel i have to impress everyone and make everone happy...right now i only feel like i have to impress my boss and my girlfriend on any regular basis.
-------------------- If it weren't for the bloody corpses, I wouldn't have any corpses at all. There are two ways to get to the top of an oak tree: start climbing or sit on an acorn. Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?
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Jellric
altered statesman
Registered: 11/07/98
Posts: 2,261
Loc: non-local
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Re: I hate you (a message to the human race) [Re: moog]
#4046200 - 04/12/05 01:59 PM (18 years, 11 months ago) |
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So you hate people eh?
But aren't you a "people" too?
I'd say be more forgiving of your fellow man since you (like most of us) are far from perfect yourself. Sounds like you stored up a lot of anger from your negative experiences in school which is understandable. Don't keep returning to that over and over again in your mind. Nothing good can come from it. Let go of the past and learn to love people again.
Right now you are just letting those people who picked on you make your life miserable years later. Don't let them win. Let those days go- they belong to your past.
Create some sort of ceremony for yourself to officially let go. You might have some drinks and cut out your tormentors pictures from your yearbook or write down their names on slips of paper and one-by-one drop them into a fire as you release the negative energy that has poisoned you. Wish them healing as you do so. If you do this sincerely you will be surprised at how powerful an experience it can be.
-------------------- I AM what Willis was talkin' bout.
Edited by Jellric (04/12/05 02:05 PM)
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EarthAngel
Tripper
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 67
Loc: New Zealand
Last seen: 16 years, 5 months
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Re: I hate you (a message to the human race) [Re: Jellric]
#4048064 - 04/12/05 10:18 PM (18 years, 11 months ago) |
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Yesterday i hated the world. I abused the lady in the blood test lab because she wasnt nice to me. I felt like crashing into every single person that got in my way on the road. I screamed at my boyfriend when he tryd to make me happy. I absued my mother for cooking the vegies the wrong way. I chased my cat around the yard for 20 minutes coz he pissed in the garage, i wanted to kick him. I hated the world, the universe and everything in it. Today i woke up sick. All that anger and negitivity made me physically sick. So im over it. You gota wake up and think "fuk it, its a beautiful day, the worlds not against me, i dont hate myself, everythings gona be the shit today" and off you go. Your perception is the key. If you dont give a fuk about anybody else, they wont give a fuk about you. go for a walk in a park, or forest and tlak to yourself, vent all that shit and let it all go, vouching to yourself to never think like that again and walk out the otherside feeling like a new person. Only you control your thoughts.
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entiformatie
EvolutionaryMovements
Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 1,043
Loc: miami, florida
Last seen: 15 years, 4 months
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Re: I hate you (a message to the human race) [Re: moog]
#4070623 - 04/18/05 09:56 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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"Probably because some day, even if it's months later, they'll hurt me, just like everyone else. And I don't want that."
sounds like a cop-out.
i don't get why you hate people. do you feel they are stupid? immoral? mean-spirited?
are you convinced that all these people deserve to be hated?
i've been pretty angry before, thought definitely not to that extent. if you want to change it, you can (and i don't mean with drugs).
-------------------- /opinion .sean
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