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OfflinePhluck
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The Vaselines
    #3972083 - 03/26/05 12:52 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

-spin spin up and down
turn turn turnaround
round round and round about
and over again

gun gun son of a gun
you are the only one
and no one else
will take my place.-

---

Jerry had a history textbook from his school, and it was open to a page about espionage. Intelligence gathering.

"HUMINT", he said. He was grinning at me, and his teeth looked so white and straight that I could feel the jealously running through me in my blood, rushing to my head, and warming my ears.

-----

Two years ago:

Jerry was wearing his lucky hat. He wears it whenever we go on a real adventure. It's a plain red baseball cap.

I was wearing the backpack.

We both wore black tracksuits with black toques, Jerry with his red brim sticking out from under the toque. It was pretty cold outside, but we were too anxious to feel it.

The opening scene:

We're looking up at this steel ladder. It's hanging off the side of the building. Just looking at it makes my heart beat faster. It doesn't look like anyone has ever climbed it, or that it was even meant for climbing. It scares the hell out of me, so I put my hands on it and start climbing.

Anyways...

We conquer the ladder, and soon we're sitting cross legged on top of the roof. Jerry starts telling me about some adventure he had years before where he threw water balloons off the roof of an apartment building. I empty the backpack onto the ground.

This is what comes out:

# A plastic Coca-Cola bottle, filled with vodka.
# A red Bic lighter.
# Two McChicken sandwiches, now cold.
# A box of Star Wars band aids (just in case).
# A package of Marlboro cigarettes.

Jerry comes over, grabs the cigarettes, and throws them as far and as hard as he can. I hear a "THOK!" as they hit the street somewhere below us.

"Hey, I paid for those!" I stare at Jerry with my mouth open. I want to curse at him but I can't. Jerry is in charge.

"Lung capacity, asshole. We might end up running away tonight. We've got to keep ourselves prepared."

Jerry was always the rational one.

So we unwrap and eat the McChicken sandwiches, washing them down with fat gulps of vodka.

The sandwiches remain delicious despite their temperature. Perfect mouth-feel, and the mayonnaise is distributed evenly this time. Sometimes they give you a big gob on just half the sandwich, and it ruins the whole thing.

Jerry tells me they don't have McDonald's in some countries. In some countries, people are going hungry.

I close my eyes and talk with Jesus. I thank him for our McChicken, and for our vodka. I ask him to send McChickens to Africa and all of the places Jerry is talking about.

We end up falling asleep before we even have an adventure. When we wake up in the morning, we're covered with dew. We go home feeling sick and empty, and I wish I could have some of the McChickens that Jesus sent to Africa.


--------------------
"I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
http://phluck.is-after.us


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InvisibleThin White Duke
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Phluck]
    #3972100 - 03/26/05 12:57 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

These were a huge influence on Kurt Cobain, I think they were his favourite act. Nirvana covered that song.


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OfflinePhluck
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Thin White Duke]
    #3972104 - 03/26/05 12:58 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Yep. Nirvana covered Son of a Gun.

They're a good band.


--------------------
"I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
http://phluck.is-after.us


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InvisibleThin White Duke
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Phluck]
    #3972109 - 03/26/05 01:00 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

They used to be my favourite band, until the who and beatles turned up.


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OfflinePhluck
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Thin White Duke]
    #3972114 - 03/26/05 01:01 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Nirvana, or The Vaselines?


--------------------
"I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
http://phluck.is-after.us


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InvisibleThin White Duke
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Phluck]
    #3972140 - 03/26/05 01:08 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Nirvana


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OfflinePhluck
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Phluck]
    #3972343 - 03/26/05 02:21 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Freakin' bump.


--------------------
"I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
http://phluck.is-after.us


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InvisibleSenor_Doobie
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Re: The Vaselines [Re: Phluck]
    #3972995 - 03/26/05 05:26 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Nice.


--------------------
"America: Fuck yeah!" -- Alexthegreat

“Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle. The real extent of this state of misinformation is known only to those who are in situations to confront facts within their knowledge with the lies of the day.”  -- Thomas Jefferson

The greatest sin of mankind is ignorance.

The press takes [Trump] literally, but not seriously; his supporters take him seriously, but not literally. --Salena Zeto (9/23/16)


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