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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
anyone scared to experience ego death?
    #3888530 - 03/08/05 07:10 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

i sure am. i've been very deep into a mushroom trip a couple times and i was way too scared to handle myself. i literally couldn't think and i was lost in a feeling foreverness where day and night and sleep and awake weren't distinguishable, moving as a robot with a mission of getting home (in the woods alone, trying to get home). i was still mentally there because i remember seeing and knowing i was extrememly fucked up but i couldn't think either well or at all, i'm not even sure.

anyways, as you may understand from reading the above, i was way confused and scared. i don't want to be there again, much less go into full ego-loss. anyone else feel with me on this? i'm scared of diving into ego-loss and even moderately high doses.
Are you afraid of ego loss?
You may choose only one
Yes
No


Votes accepted from (03/08/05 02:00 PM) to (No end specified)
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--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.


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InvisibleHelp on the Way
Slipknot420

Registered: 08/13/00
Posts: 2,893
Loc: Another World
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888562 - 03/08/05 07:18 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

nope already been there more than once

its the ultimate transcendence

i always flip out right before though


--------------------
:shocked: *Divine Moments of Truth* :shocked:


"Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns - it calls me on and on across the universe" ~ John Lennon

"Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right" ~The Grateful Dead

"Religionists, with their guaranteed eventual paradise, of which they know nothing, taking it all on 'faith,' can't be expected to understand or sympathize with those with a yen to storm the Gate of Heaven and see for themselves what all the praying's about!" ~Robert Hunter


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OfflineGinseng1
Elegant Universe
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Registered: 09/02/04
Posts: 3,310
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Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888563 - 03/08/05 07:18 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Ego-loss is something that must be done under the right settings. If you eat enough mushrooms to experience ego-loss and you aren't prepared for it, the result can be an extremely nightmarish trip.

If set & setting is right and you trust the mushrooms isnt killing you, then you can definately do it.

I had the opportunity of ego-loss but denied it and fought it until i was a complete madman, because I was not in a good setting and I definately wasn't ready for it. I didn't let it happen, so I got my ass kicked. If I had just gone with it and not fought the trip, then I could have experienced ego-loss and come out better in the end.


--------------------
Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...


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InvisibleHelp on the Way
Slipknot420

Registered: 08/13/00
Posts: 2,893
Loc: Another World
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888614 - 03/08/05 07:27 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

dmt was my favorite way

its so fast that you cant resist/panic very long before you are totally dominated by it

and then it sends you so far!

freedom from self is the best gift


--------------------
:shocked: *Divine Moments of Truth* :shocked:


"Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns - it calls me on and on across the universe" ~ John Lennon

"Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right" ~The Grateful Dead

"Religionists, with their guaranteed eventual paradise, of which they know nothing, taking it all on 'faith,' can't be expected to understand or sympathize with those with a yen to storm the Gate of Heaven and see for themselves what all the praying's about!" ~Robert Hunter


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OfflineKerr
Who else would I be

Registered: 02/05/05
Posts: 1,611
Loc: My roots in the Koots
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: Ginseng1]
    #3888646 - 03/08/05 07:31 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

I have yet to experience ego death, but I feel that I could go with it. During my last trip, I ate 5 grams of cubensis and had the most intense experience to date. During the peak I was sprawled out on the floor with my eyes close and was experiencing CEV's.

When I opened my eyes and chilled for a minute I noticed that when I propped myself up onto my elbows, the pillow that I rested on became extremely dark. I started to stare into it, I soon felt my eyes slowly moving down. I could feel them so well and it was so smooth, the thing was I wasn't trying to do it, it just happened.(Hope that makes some sense :smile: ) They moved down until they entered the void. I found no problem losing myself in this blackness, it was actually quite enjoyable but then to no avail I clicked out of it so to speak.

I await the day when I can experience dissolving my ego and leaving this world for a while :smile:


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"Easy going and organic thoughts bent on self experimentation and knowledge and growth for the betterment of self and those around us"
-Playdo the philosophiser


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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: Help on the Way]
    #3888650 - 03/08/05 07:33 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Slipknot420 said:
freedom from self is the best gift




is it? its that good? so then death must be something you are looking forward to? i'm really curious to understand this better, don't think i'm being a dick or something.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.


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InvisibleHelp on the Way
Slipknot420

Registered: 08/13/00
Posts: 2,893
Loc: Another World
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888693 - 03/08/05 07:41 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

i always come back feeling very humbled after ego death

death itself will suck and be painful and i will probably fight it the whole way

but im looking forward to returning to the ultimate state of everything/nothing
and if thats not what actually happens, well im still interested in whats next.....


--------------------
:shocked: *Divine Moments of Truth* :shocked:


"Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns - it calls me on and on across the universe" ~ John Lennon

"Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right" ~The Grateful Dead

"Religionists, with their guaranteed eventual paradise, of which they know nothing, taking it all on 'faith,' can't be expected to understand or sympathize with those with a yen to storm the Gate of Heaven and see for themselves what all the praying's about!" ~Robert Hunter


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OfflineLilShank
TECH N9NE

Registered: 12/24/04
Posts: 400
Last seen: 9 years, 11 months
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888720 - 03/08/05 07:47 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

theres no reason to be afraid of ego death, i have experienced it, its just another part of the trip. sure its scary for a minute. but its nothing u cant get over, and it gives you a new outlook on things.


--------------------
Thats why ur momma got a big ol' butt
(oh yeah)
Thats why ur sister got a big ol' butt
(oh yeah)
since ur momma and ur sister got a big ol butt
they helped the NiNa bust a big ol' nut


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OfflineQuankus
keep a dreamjournal
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/18/04
Posts: 362
Loc: Benicia, CA and Monterey ...
Last seen: 1 year, 7 months
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: LilShank]
    #3888782 - 03/08/05 07:58 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

i got my ass kicked unexpectedly off too high a dose for my second time. and i was way scared, but after i realized the immense power of the shroom. ego loss isnt talked about enough, good topic TODAY.


--------------------

CyanoFriscosa


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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: LilShank]
    #3888823 - 03/08/05 08:07 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

the only problem with my "minute" of scaryness is that the minute lasted over two hours and the two hours felt like forever. i just don't know if i can jump in all the way. i'm going to keep it as an option though, because some day i may be ready.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,359
Loc: In the jungle
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888829 - 03/08/05 08:09 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

I used to be terrified of ego death.

But not anymore. My first ego death was a total nightmare. My second, I was able to surrender peacefully and experienced all that 'total one-ness' stuff talked about here. It was beautiful.

In my observations, the first ego death is often scary. Once you know what you're doing however (in surrendering youself utterly) it can become something spectacular.


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Invisiblejux
I'm better thanan STD!

Registered: 04/06/04
Posts: 924
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3888837 - 03/08/05 08:10 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Why fear ego death?
When the ego dies, there is nothing left to feel fear.

I like the feeling of ego death. wow, that's a conflicted statement.

I should say, the experience of becoming the experience is one that found itself enjoyable.


--------------------


Edited by jux (03/08/05 08:11 PM)


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Offlinedr0mni
My Own Messiah
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Registered: 08/21/04
Posts: 2,921
Loc: USF Tampa, Fl
Last seen: 9 years, 5 months
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: jux]
    #3889007 - 03/08/05 08:32 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Yes, "I" am very afraid of ego death! :laugh:

I have never had an ego-death but I will welcome it with open arms


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Invisiblegdman
badger, badger,badger...
Male User Gallery

Registered: 12/10/02
Posts: 16,286
Loc: Dancing In the Streets
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3889030 - 03/08/05 08:35 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

There is nothing to fear, just accept it, be in a good enviorment. Go with the flow. You'll come back after, no need to worry.


--------------------


Got a question about a substance?  Erowid might already have your answer! Have questions about the  mushroom experience? The  Tripper's FAQ may have your answer or someone else might have had your question before.
         
I know up on the top you are seeing great sights, but down at the bottom we, too, should have rights.
  - Theodor Seuss Geisel Dr. Suess

"I didn't come here to be easily understood" - Steve


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OfflineTrainwreck
No. Really.

Registered: 12/22/04
Posts: 3,563
Loc: Southern California
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: gdman]
    #3889136 - 03/08/05 08:49 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Maybe a little intimidated, not scared.


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Offlinepshawny
Mycobian
Male

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Registered: 09/11/04
Posts: 1,332
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Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3889727 - 03/08/05 11:25 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Ego death for me the first time was kinda scary. It was my first time with mushrooms. It was in a nice quiet setting with 2 good friends, but I didn't know the power of mushrooms. We all had 2.5 grams then smoked a small bowl of mj. I had CEV's OEV's, everything was crazy. I thought my body was shutting down and I wasn't going to make it through the night, but it all turned out great. I enjoy mushrooms now that I know I'm not going to die.


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OfflineGrizzy
Explorer of mindand matter

Registered: 03/26/04
Posts: 263
Loc: Bay Area, CA - USA
Last seen: 6 years, 6 months
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: pshawny]
    #3890127 - 03/09/05 12:51 AM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Cleanse yourself. Dismiss the current program to start anew. Abandon the prior identity that's been tainted by society and find yourself again. Give rebirth to the true soul and spirit that lies within you.

Fear not the death of the ego, but look forward to the rebirth of a more true, a more YOU...ego.


--------------------
"You already know everything, it's just a matter of time before you remember..."


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OfflineJROS14
Protege
Registered: 11/16/04
Posts: 74
Loc: SF, CA
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: Grizzy]
    #3894919 - 03/09/05 10:28 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

ive tripped 5 or 6 times but never experienced ego death. im a bit foggy on exactly what the ego-death seems like. is it that there are multiple voices talking in your head? or that you don't know who or what you are anymore, or both? i'm not quite sure what you guys are talkin about here.


--------------------
**GRoUP HUG**


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Offlineholio1
intense

Registered: 03/19/04
Posts: 311
Loc: toronto son
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3894985 - 03/09/05 10:40 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

I am not scared of it, but it sure as hell is scary before you get there.
Would like to go back, but its some serious shit and I think I will wait on it for a while.

to grizz,
yea its like when you dont know who/what you are. not like 'who am i what am i doing?' but more that you just completely lose any sense of 'self' and more just 'are'
usually happens with eyes closed and you go away to another place for a while (may not be that long in actual time though)
usually will take at the least 3.5g for the first time, it happened to me on 7 :oogle:
just make sure you actually are ready to go there (sort of impossible). by that i mean to say be prepared to let go entirely and not worry


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InvisibleHelp on the Way
Slipknot420

Registered: 08/13/00
Posts: 2,893
Loc: Another World
Re: anyone scared to experience ego death? [Re: TODAY]
    #3895165 - 03/09/05 11:14 PM (11 years, 8 months ago)

Today, i bet your experience would have been a lot better if you were somewhere safer, like somebody's house where you could just lay down and let go

when you are walking through the woods trying to get home, ego loss would definitely be an unwelcome visitor as your trying to keep it together and it's trying to pull you apart


--------------------
:shocked: *Divine Moments of Truth* :shocked:


"Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns - it calls me on and on across the universe" ~ John Lennon

"Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right" ~The Grateful Dead

"Religionists, with their guaranteed eventual paradise, of which they know nothing, taking it all on 'faith,' can't be expected to understand or sympathize with those with a yen to storm the Gate of Heaven and see for themselves what all the praying's about!" ~Robert Hunter


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
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