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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!"
#3887523 - 03/08/05 01:43 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Well that's it. I've had about as much bullshit from this corporation as I can stand!
Today I made the sober decision to get myself fired. Why, you might ask, wouldn't I just quit? Well if I get fired I get a 2-week severence pay, AND I then qualify for unemployment insurence (time to get some of those tax dollars back!).
So, I want to get myself fired. I'm not going to be blatantly obvious about it, because that's not how I like to operate. Instead I'm just going to generally DO NOTHING for the time I am at work.
Any suggestions? I work in PC tech-support, on the phone. Anyone else had this job and decided to fuck it? What did you do? GIVE ME SOME IDEAS!!!
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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Boom
just a tester
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 11,252
Loc: Cypress Creek
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887537 - 03/08/05 01:46 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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It may actually be harder than you think...
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vinsue
Grand Old Fart
Registered: 02/17/04
Posts: 17,953
Loc: The Garden State(NJ)
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887558 - 03/08/05 01:49 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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I'm sure OTD would have a few suggestions on how to get fired. Seriously, how many weeks of comp. do you get in Canada??
-------------------- "All mushrooms are edible; but some only once." Croatian proverb. BTW ... Have You Rated Ythans Mom Yet ?? ... ... HERE'S HOW ... (be nice) . ...
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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: Boom]
#3887559 - 03/08/05 01:50 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Well no shit! I haven't exactly been "doing my job" for the past six months
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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JettaJay
PsychedelicStranger
Registered: 10/14/04
Posts: 2,829
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887563 - 03/08/05 01:51 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Just don't answer the phone. Or play on the Shroomery all day ...... oh yeah tech-support hates when you play games all day aswell.
-------------------- I saw a little green light buzzing around in a tree, and it dawned on me that "they" were here ~~~LouiseLouise
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geokills
∙∙∙∙☼ º¿° ☼∙∙∙∙
Registered: 05/08/01
Posts: 23,544
Loc: city of angels
Last seen: 4 hours, 8 minutes
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887567 - 03/08/05 01:51 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Watch the movie Office Space. Follow suit
-------------------- -------------------- ┼ ··∙ long live the shroomery ∙·· ┼ ...╬π╥ ╥π╬...
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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: geokills]
#3887572 - 03/08/05 01:53 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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That movie is something of a religious experience for me
I want to try taking a copier with me, when I leave.
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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WildRunner
Obey little,Resist much
Registered: 02/13/05
Posts: 286
Loc: Where the wild things are
Last seen: 16 years, 9 months
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887584 - 03/08/05 01:55 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Smoke a big fat chonga in the washroom.
-------------------- If you dont know where you're going, any road will take you there.
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drtyfrnk
PresidentialCandidate 2008
Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 2,961
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Last seen: 14 years, 4 months
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887588 - 03/08/05 01:56 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Tren, I'm gonna help you get a photo copier when you get canned from here. Seriously man. Alright people of the pub, you must know this. I work with Trendal. It's hell here. Seriously. Imagine Office Space x 100 with Lumbergh beatin down your throat every day... god, we need new jobs T :P
-------------------- It's Krang, Bitch!
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887591 - 03/08/05 01:56 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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I have an idea...
You can "accidently" send an email to your boss talking about what a big butthole and a huge douche he is. Make it clear that you thought you were emailing a friend.
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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: drtyfrnk]
#3887593 - 03/08/05 01:57 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Hehehe, oh I don't need a new job YET. I'm still trying to fuck this one over first
IT BEGINS!
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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moog
Stranger
Registered: 02/15/05
Posts: 1,296
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887614 - 03/08/05 02:04 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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PC tech support is really hard to get fired from. I know cause I had a job like that for a while. I came in 15-20 minutes later than all the other phone agents, was constantly on break, and would take an extra half hour for lunch every day. my boss called me into his office all the time to bitch at me but never fired me. go figure...
here's my suggestion: do something funny like tell people blatantly false info, or that they called the wrong number, even though they went through the "press # for this" sequence when they got through, or pretend to have a thick Indian accent and keep asking the caller to repeat everything they say until they get frustrated and hang up. have fun with it..
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BloodNOil
Captain Zeep
Registered: 10/08/03
Posts: 1,020
Last seen: 15 years, 6 months
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: moog]
#3887635 - 03/08/05 02:10 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Rule of Thumb: If you're not thinking "Wheeeeee!" you're not trying.
-------------------- It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!
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Jellric
altered statesman
Registered: 11/07/98
Posts: 2,261
Loc: non-local
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887751 - 03/08/05 02:31 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Yes, I used to work phone tech support and it was indeed a shit job. The job quickly lost its appeal as soon as I realized that the goal was to get the customer off the phone as quickly as possible rather than actually help them. Also the business I worked for was run by dumbasses from some sort of hellish insane asylum. We did tech support for Gateway computers and they practically went under since then so I was going to lose that job eventually anyhow.
Just stretch out those calls as long as possible..You said you weren't doing much anyway, why not have fun with it? Engage the callers in long conversations about any topic that interests you while you wait for scandisk to complete or some other long, drawn out meaningless task. You'll eventually get fired for your marathon call times and have fun doing it.
-------------------- I AM what Willis was talkin' bout.
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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: Jellric]
#3887775 - 03/08/05 02:35 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Just stretch out those calls as long as possible
Actually, I have been told on MANY occaisions that I need to MAKE MY CALLS LAST LONGER!!!!
Yes, that's right. My handle time is "too low" at 12 minutes/call average. My handle time is low because I actually know how to use a computer and can usually get them fixed in 5-10 mins...yet the management thinks this is "too low" and that I should have a handle time TWICE as long as what I do.
Maybe I should go for a 60-second average handle time?
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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Jellric
altered statesman
Registered: 11/07/98
Posts: 2,261
Loc: non-local
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887795 - 03/08/05 02:41 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Wow. Our call time target was eight minutes.
Yeah, shoot for sixty seconds. Get their info and have them run scandisk and call back when its done.
Hmm..When they call back do they get a random tech support person or can they call you direct?
-------------------- I AM what Willis was talkin' bout.
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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: Jellric]
#3887807 - 03/08/05 02:43 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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They get a random agent. It helps to raise the level of customer anger/disatisfaction
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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Phluck
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 04/10/99
Posts: 11,394
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 4 months, 25 days
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887815 - 03/08/05 02:45 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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That's the weirdest thing... a LONGER call time?
Just keep hitting the release button, over, and over, and over, and over, and over...
Make fun of customers. Take off your headset, and just start playing games.
See if you can install Debian on your computer.
-------------------- "I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson http://phluck.is-after.us
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Jellric
altered statesman
Registered: 11/07/98
Posts: 2,261
Loc: non-local
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: trendal]
#3887833 - 03/08/05 02:48 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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Heh. Yeah, those were always the most pissed off callers. The ones who had called multiple times with no resolution (usually due to their inability to follow instructions) were the worst. It was always fun sorting through their call history while they fumed. Those callers I usually dropped at the first hint of attitude. I'd put them on hold and for some reason always seemed to hit the disconnect button while coming off hold. Clumsy me..
-------------------- I AM what Willis was talkin' bout.
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trendal
J♠
Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: That point when you finally decide: "I'm going to get fired!" [Re: Phluck]
#3887850 - 03/08/05 02:53 PM (19 years, 15 days ago) |
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I've hung up on more people today than I have in the entire 13 months of previous work
I've also started answering the phone using celebrity names. Fabio and Arnie have thus far made an appearance.
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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