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 MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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 Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. 
#3853485 - 03/01/05 05:21 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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A few months ago I was so certain of my purpose in life...now I'm not so sure. Everything is cloudy. I can't take it anymore, this feeling of being 'half-there.' I do not blame my lost path on weed, but more my abuse of it these past few months. So I'm quitting until further notice. What sucks is that the prospect of not smoking weed for awhile makes me feel really depressed. Sometimes the only highlight of my day is getting stoned. And that's how I knew that I needed to cut back. People who read my posts here on the Shroomery know that I've been saying that I'm going to cut back for months, and yet I haven't done it yet. Well, now's the time.
I'm hoping that whenever I get the urge to toke up I'll read a book instead or exercise. This will not be easy though, because I have tried to quit before and have given in like, on the second day. Yes, I'm aware of how pathetic this sounds. In fact, the reason why I didn't start a thread like this earlier is because I was worried about people thinking I am weak-willed and pathetic, or that I am blaming my problems on the weed. WEll, I AM weak-willed and my situation is pathetic, but it is my misuse of this wonderful plant which has caused me trouble, not the plant itself. Weed has done a lot of good for me, but now it's time to put it aside.
So I'm guessing this will be sort of a journal that I hope will help me stop this bad habit of toking up nightly, or even throughout the day. My goal is to lay off on the pot until spring break (about 2 weeks away) and then only toke once (yes, Ellemy, ONCE!) a week. I'm really hoping that by keeping a log it will give me some strength to quit the habit.
So there it is. I'm going to try and keep busy. To be honest, the very thought of not smoking tonight is making me want to cry. I've had a shitty day and all I want to do is relax and get high. But I can't, because that's how my trouble started since I have no self-control. I'm going to have to find something else to do but I don't know what that is. I've thought about getting drunk instead but that will only cause more problems. Somehow I have to deal with these feelings of wanting to be high all the time.
Suggestions welcome.
*me*
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 signoffate
Only Human
Registered: 02/22/05
Posts: 161
Loc: Where is here?
Last seen: 16 years, 3 months
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3853666 - 03/01/05 05:59 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Just surrender, that could mean letting go of Pot for a time or just toking a little because you feel you NEED it, for now... it won't always be like this you know. Cold turkey is hard, why not focus on what your going to do with your time instead, infact take a small hit and give it some real deep thought... go for a walk and ask yourself what you want, how you see yourself getting there, and be honest, don't try to kid yourself into thinking that It's the weeds fault or some other shit, make do with your situation as best you can... and if your intentions are true then you will very soon be looking at your life from a new angle.
Anything that affects your mind and remains in your body does create dependency, and withdrawl is perfectly natural... pace yourself!
Edited by signoffate (03/01/05 06:03 PM)
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Blu Spore
Registered: 10/26/02
Posts: 1,319
Loc: Canada 
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3853689 - 03/01/05 06:05 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Well wanting to quit is the first step  I recently quit smoking pot after 5 years of daily smoking. It has been almost a month and a haft since I flushed my last joint down the toilet. I can honestly say I have not felt this good physically and mentally in years, my mind is so much sharper and I feel like I have way more energy. I tried smoking pot again about a week ago and found that it hurt my lungs and I did not enjoy the high as much as I used to.
The first five days are the hardest and your brain constantly wants to smoke up but once you get over that initial feeling it becomes easier to cope. You may find that once you do give it up, you wont even want to smoke once a week because it will ruin that clarity of mind that will seem new to you (I don?t know how long you smoked for but the longer you do it the more clouded your mind becomes) Good luck! Also if you can?t sleep without pot try meletonin for the first while.
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JacquesCousteau 
Being.
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 7,825
Loc: Everywhere, Everytime.
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3854021 - 03/01/05 07:16 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
EllemyshShade said:
Sometimes the only highlight of my day is getting stoned.
Forgive me, I didn't read the whole post... don't have enough time right this instant. But I wanted to comment on this one thing.
First of all, I'm going through the exact same shit... fighting back and forth between the fact that smoking keeps me happy and the fact that I know it's bad for me and clouding my ability to see my own path in life.
But here's the thing... you've got to completely break free of it. You've got to make it so smoking isn't even an idea...
Then, on the days that smoking WOULD have been the only highlight of your day, you'll find that there are TONS of smaller highlights that stand out.
All the time we spend thinking about toking and how great it's gonna be, or (During the transition) all the time we spend thinking about toking and how much we wish we could fucking light up a bowl... *twitch twitch*
All that time is filled with these tiny little moments of wonder. Each one would be a highlight of our day, if it weren't for the relative distance we create between boring moments and these so-called highlights, by getting stoned.
It's like... if you allow the highlight of your day to become getting stoned, all other highlights will pale in comparison. So you've got to break free from the attachment to this one highlight in order to see all the other smaller highlights that are being drowned out by the glow of the burning embers.
I'm not trying to preach to you or anything... like I said, i'm in the same place. My talking this out is helping me as much (if not more) than it's helping you.
Be strong... you can do it if you believe you can. After day 3, it's all downhill.
-JC
*finishing up day 2 of sobriety*
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superblingtheory
ghettogepetto
Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 921
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: JacquesCousteau]
#3854124 - 03/01/05 07:53 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Good for you EllemyshShade! I didn't stop smoking it but recently went only for eating it and it's been about two weeks and no smoking it and I limit my intake to only in the PM hours (not during worktime) and only once a week. So far I only ate some when I had a bonfire with my friends last week, and last night for purely sexual reasons. Two things led me to believing this would be effective- 1. This costs so much to cook and not smoke, the cost itself is prohibative. 2. The experience is so qualitively different and strong that it does not lend itself to any kind of activity that I would be doing if I could just smoke a bit and go work in my shops. Maybe you would want to try to make target approaches to consumption like this a possibility to consider- I only say this because it worked well for me- but I wish you luck in doing whatever you feel is right- and it is very nice to see someone admitting they are overconsuming something and trying to make really positive changes not clouded with the problematics of blame. Very nice. Your post is a positive ray of light.
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Guts and danger, Airborne Ranger...
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Divided_Sky
Ten ThousandThings
Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 3,171
Loc: The Shining Void
Last seen: 15 years, 13 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: superblingtheory]
#3855113 - 03/01/05 11:52 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Alot of freinds of mine have gone through weed "withdrawls", you feel pretty dull and depressed for a few weeks. What many people don't see is that the weed can actually be the source of the depression, rather than simply an escape from it. I've always only smoked in frequently and could always count on feeling spacey, unmotivated, depressed for the next 12-24 hours. From what I understand that feeling builds the more you use it, and takes longer to go away. You need to believe that sober life can also be good, and just stick with it until you feel better.
I think you will definately find the world making more sense, and life to be more rewarding. I still crave weed sometimes, and maybe I'll go back at some point, but I think my 9 month hiatus has really helped me.
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1. "After an hour I wasn't feeling anything so I decided to take another..."
2. "We were feeling pretty good so we decided to smoke a few bowls..."
3. "I had to be real quiet because my parents were asleep upstairs..."
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Divided_Sky]
#3855291 - 03/02/05 12:32 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thanks guys. 
Tonight, my husband started toking out of the vaporizer and I was tempted, but I jumped on the treadmill and exercised instead. Now I'm cleaning and doing laundary. I feel good right now.
Day one without pot was a success. 
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niteowl
GrandPaw
Registered: 07/01/03
Posts: 16,291
Loc: 
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Blu Spore]
#3855714 - 03/02/05 03:07 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
JimmytheWorm said:
The first five days are the hardest and your brain constantly wants to smoke up but once you get over that initial feeling it becomes easier to cope.
I have had to quit for a couple of weeks before.(not on purpose....dry spell  )and the first 3-5 days are a real bitch. My wife told me that if she could find some pot she would buy it for me. 
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Live for the moment you are in nowDon't be bogged down by your pastDon't be afraid of what lies in your future
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: niteowl]
#3858845 - 03/02/05 06:00 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Well, it's day 2 of not toking and it feels like it's been F O R E V E R.
but it's only been 2 days...agh. I feel like my brain is keeping track of every passing second that I am sober. Like there's a clock in my head keeping track...tick tick tick need to smoke tick tick tick.
WEll, I'm hanging on!! I've been doing some reading and running around town. I'll exercise tonight but mostly I just feel BLAH. I feel achy and befuddled. Mostly because I'm unpleasantly sober.
But I'm not giving up! 
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the_phoenix
Stranger
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3859131 - 03/02/05 06:56 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Keep it up!!!
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Sterile
mushroom lover
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Posts: 2,529
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3859155 - 03/02/05 07:03 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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This is very good, and much more easy than what it seems for you right now...its just the rist few steps that are annoying...
I was smoking for the past 7 years soooo much that i don't even remember what sober feels like... on my 5th month off weed right now, and it feels as if i am being born into a new world.
I start to learn about how my brain functions without THC, very interesting.
I was so stoned, that i wouldn't even post here....
Its nice to hear of more shroomerites coming back home after a long trip.
Welcome home Ellemy!
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The Source Of The Force
Is The Power Of The Mind
"if you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove." - timothy leary"
Anno: "-I can do anything with those clouds!"
Annos Tek
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dblaney
Human Being
Registered: 10/03/04
Posts: 7,894
Loc: Here & Now
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3859472 - 03/02/05 07:50 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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--------------------
"What is in us that turns a deaf ear to the cries of human suffering?"
"Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword"
- John Mayer
Making the noise "penicillin" is no substitute for actually taking penicillin.
"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or their revolutionary right to dismember or overthrow it." -Abraham Lincoln
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QuantumMeltdown
Space Monkey
Registered: 10/31/01
Posts: 4,962
Loc: Ft. Lauderdale, FL
Last seen: 3 months, 8 hours
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 Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3859580 - 03/02/05 08:18 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Well tomorow will be your day 3 and It will be my day one. Due to my recent legal problems. Being arrested and charged with three felony drug possesion charges I am not really quiting out of my own will as much as I am being forced too by the government. I will still share in your same struggles though. I am giving up on my own terms. I could keep smoking untill my court date which probably won't be another 45-50 days but I am deciding to clean up my act now so as to look good to the judge. I will also be attending my first NA meeting tomorow night as well and It will be my first day sober from everything in 7 years. I wish you luck ellemy.
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-QuantumMeltdown
Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
-Mark Twain
"The time has come the walrus said, little oysters hide their heads, my Twain of thought is loosely bound I guess its time to Mark this down, Be good and you will be lonesome
Be lonesome and you will be free
Live a lie and you will live to regret it
That's what livin' is to me
That's what livin' is to me"
Jimmy Buffett
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Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3859720 - 03/02/05 08:45 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Just get over the 3-day hump and you'll be cool.
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KackleDude
transmundaneother
Registered: 06/11/02
Posts: 863
Loc: Close to the Edge, Down b...
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Silversoul]
#3859787 - 03/02/05 09:00 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Good move, I knew it was time to quit when I made the jump to the real world, living independently. It's tough for a while, and it may take a couple attempts (I know it did for me), but I've only smoked a few times in the last couple months and It really feels more normal for me to not smoke now. Strange, I would light up daily for years and now If I feel like smoking I just ask myself 'what would be the point? you may get relaxed and forget your problems.. but then you're forgetting your problems..'
It's really be beneficial in the long run, especially if you feel it will be.
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yeeeahh, it's gonna be well wicked
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: KackleDude]
#3863081 - 03/03/05 02:57 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thanks for the continued support guys.
To be honest, I'm not doing too good.  It's day three and I feel so down. It bothers me to think that this might be my natural sober state, this depression. Blah, makes me remember why I started smoking habitually to begin with. Weed did wonders for my moody personality.
I am going to be around people who will be smoking this weekend. Kevin and his step-mother. Kevin says that I am just overreacting about the weed. And I trust him, but I don't think so. I DO feel a lot more 'awake,' much more sharp and excitable. But that is part of the problem too, because the old anxiety is hitting me hard. I'm irritable. Maybe I am just freaking out about it too much. Who knows. I don't. It's annoying that I feel so bummed out and I know that toking a bit of weed would make me feel so much better. Yeah, this is a lame post but oh well, fuck it.
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agr8fulchick
Feed Your Head!
Registered: 08/19/04
Posts: 707
Loc: Stranded in Iowa
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
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 Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3863315 - 03/03/05 03:31 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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You are so cute EllemyshShade! I just love reading your posts
I have been looking for jobs, and since I know that a drug test will be required, I have been clean since the beginning of december, and I only made exceptinos on new year's and when a very special friend came over. I'm ok with it, I don't NEED it, it's just like drinking, you don't need that either. My friends still smoke, and I still sit in the room and chill with them. They always look a bit more ridiculous when I'm not also stoned, but that can be amusing.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't need it. I don't even really feel any desire to smoke it, as my lungs feel all nice and pink and smoke-free. I've also discovered good rum and fine wine! I love rum and coke, so my suggestion is that when you feel the urge to toke up, go mix yourself a yummy drink or poor a glass of wine (or whatever you like). The yummy drink can be your reward for not smoking, and it's legal too!
I'm pulling for you. If you want some super smooth Puerto Rican rum, come on over, drinks are on me  
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Life's a journey. Take the scenic route.
 
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dblaney
Human Being
Registered: 10/03/04
Posts: 7,894
Loc: Here & Now
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3863323 - 03/03/05 03:32 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
EllemyshShade said:
Yeah, this is a lame post but oh well, fuck it.
Don't be ridiculous!
I have some idea what you're talking about, having tried stopping at least three or four times. But take solace in the notion that what you are experiencing truly is a result of the weed. I found that the worst part of quitting was the boredom. For me, finding things to occupy myself with so I didn't think about the pot worked well, perhaps it would for you too. Rent some movies, buy a nice bottle of wine, and enjoy the evening with your husband. Go exercise, go shopping, go meet people, volunteer somewhere, start a garden. Actually, starting a garden would be wonderful (assuming you don't already have one), as it's so therapeutic and just, well, wonderful. Just don't think about the weed. In time you will think about it less and less. Your mood will stabilize within a week or two, and you will be back to the sober norm. If you are having serious problems and cannot distract yourself, you could try some herbal remedies like valerian, kava, St. John's Wort, niacinamine, melatonin, etc.
Nothing but good vibes your way
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"What is in us that turns a deaf ear to the cries of human suffering?"
"Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword"
- John Mayer
Making the noise "penicillin" is no substitute for actually taking penicillin.
"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or their revolutionary right to dismember or overthrow it." -Abraham Lincoln
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agr8fulchick
Feed Your Head!
Registered: 08/19/04
Posts: 707
Loc: Stranded in Iowa
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
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 Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: dblaney]
#3863345 - 03/03/05 03:35 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yes, wine and a garden! Everyone should have a garden, or potted plants if you don't have room for a garden But definately some wine...
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Life's a journey. Take the scenic route.
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: agr8fulchick]
#3863521 - 03/03/05 04:03 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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You guys are great.  I know I'm being whiny about quitting, but hey, it's my thread right? 
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QuantumMeltdown
Space Monkey
Registered: 10/31/01
Posts: 4,962
Loc: Ft. Lauderdale, FL
Last seen: 3 months, 8 hours
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3863668 - 03/03/05 04:35 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Im still here with you ellemy. Ive made it through today so far without smoking. Im sure you read my bust thread. Thats my reason not quite as noble as yours but Im still feeling down and out. I may have trouble sleeping tonight. Im on my way to my first NA meeting and on my way back I will probably pick up a bottle of melatonin. Just stick with it. In a week I guarantee you will feel so much better. take care and stay away from that dope for a little while if you really feel like you did on the first post on this thread. I felt like that for about two years now I could never conjure up the will power to quit thats how week willed I was. I eventually progressed to become and alcoholic then became dependant on benzos for a couple months and now am facing the long arm of the law. Im not saying this would ever happen to you. Your probably older and more responsible then me but its still good for your self esteem to quit something you think you are no longer enjoying.
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-QuantumMeltdown
Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
-Mark Twain
"The time has come the walrus said, little oysters hide their heads, my Twain of thought is loosely bound I guess its time to Mark this down, Be good and you will be lonesome
Be lonesome and you will be free
Live a lie and you will live to regret it
That's what livin' is to me
That's what livin' is to me"
Jimmy Buffett
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Psychoactive1984
PositiveCynicist
Registered: 02/06/05
Posts: 3,546
Loc: California, Monterey Coun...
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: QuantumMeltdown]
#3863755 - 03/03/05 04:53 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Well, are you quiting for yourself, or for another purpose, (girlfriend, job, forced to etc..). Dunno, to me it isn't such a bad thing provided you can do it and sustain your life. Too often have I read many posts blaming drugs for their issues, might their be something else perhaps the monotony in your life that's causing the issue.
Don't be so focused on it, but realize that it isn't your issue at hand. Maybe change your lifestyle (Note: I'm not telling you to go spark one up and give in, but maybe refocus the "issues" that you have, as more often then not when someone is on drugs they tend to blame the drugs for their problems).
Hope it was constructive. Good luck whatever you decide to do.
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"Their is one overriding question that concerns us all: How can we get out of the fatal groove we are in, the one that is leading towards the brink?" Albert Szent-Gyorgyi
"We may not be capable of eradicating the corruption of reason, but we must nevertheless counter it at every instance and with every means." Dan Agin
"Politics is the best religion and politicians are the worst followers."
-It's ok to trip as long as you don't fall.
-Substance over Style.
-Common sense is uncommon.
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freddurgan
Techgnostic
Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 11 years, 16 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Psychoactive1984]
#3863839 - 03/03/05 05:13 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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I kind of know where you guys are coming from and I kind of don't. I can stop smoking at the drop of a hat (done it like 15 times) but I can't resist fucking peer pressure. My roommate smokes, and sometimes he's like "Let's smoke and play Smash Brothers" and I think to myself "Aren't I stopping smoking?" but stoned Smash Brothers is too damn FUN!
=( Oh well. Quitting really is pretty easy though. Aren't you in school Ellemy? Just take more classes or something. Force yourself to do something else besides sit around. But don't pick shitty classes. Give yourself a semester of good classes to feed off of.
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tomk
King of OTD
Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 1,559
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Psychoactive1984]
#3863844 - 03/03/05 05:13 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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You probably already know I think most potheads are self medicating. If you are, the condition you were medicating is going to come back. This may be depression / anxiety related. So, you may need to see someone about some alternate medication. If you have depression/anxiety and it's biologically based, none of these suggestions are going to make the chemicals in your brain balance right. You should see about getting evaluated for these things.
I mean, consider the possibilities and consequences of each. 1.) Pot is causing your depressive irritable symptoms. In this case, stopping it will be hard and then you will be better. Sometimes people are like this. 2.) You are depressed, and pot is your medication. In this case, stopping may have the same effect on you as any mentally ill person who discontinues their medication. Your symptoms will continue to get worse, even as the undesirable mental clouding from pot goes away.
Because of the way you constantly describe your experiences, you sound like you suffer from ahedonia. This means you don't take pleasure in things. From this I would infer that you are more likely in condition 2, rather then condition 1. Pot is the highlight of your day because everything else is affected by the ahedonia and pot helps with that.
If you are self medicating, and want to quit smoking all the time, you should start a new course of antidepressive treatment, from st johns wart to psychopharms, before stopping the pot. These usually take a month to work.
Also, realizing you are self medicating will change your smoking habits. If you realize you are self medicating, you can experiment with what dosages and times help you most while minimizing the clouding effects. It sounds like your problem might be you are self medicating with pot but not treating it like medicine. This doesn't mean stopping is the right choice, but finding a schedule that works and sticking with it. I.e. treat it like medicine and not as a recreational activity.
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"I am eternally free"
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Divided_Sky
Ten ThousandThings
Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 3,171
Loc: The Shining Void
Last seen: 15 years, 13 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3864241 - 03/03/05 06:32 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Stick with it Ellemy, think: what would Jean Luc do?
Although you may find that weed was glossing over problems you had, I think it's more likely that you are just having a withdrawl and your mind is conjuring up anything it can to get you to start toking again. It will entice you telling you how many problems you have, how good weed is, etc. Know that these are just little tricks your ego will play in the short term while you are readjusting. Feeling low for even a few months after quiting weed is NOT unusual, and I believe may have a phsyiological basis, not just a psychological one. Just keep it up and you'll feel better. Like any trip it take time to get comfortable with the state of mind you are in. I think in time you'll be glad you did.
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1. "After an hour I wasn't feeling anything so I decided to take another..."
2. "We were feeling pretty good so we decided to smoke a few bowls..."
3. "I had to be real quiet because my parents were asleep upstairs..."
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3864281 - 03/03/05 06:39 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Awesome post, tomk. You bring up a lot of points for me to consider. Yes, I do think I was self-medicating. I've been on pharms before for mental disorders and I got so sick of the endless search for the perfect drug with no side-effects that I just gave up.
I especially like this point you made:
Quote:
It sounds like your problem might be you are self medicating with pot but not treating it like medicine.
I think you might have hit the nail on the head...
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Divided_Sky]
#3864303 - 03/03/05 06:43 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Divided_Sky said:
Stick with it Ellemy, think: what would Jean Luc do?
Oh, hehe, that made me smile.  I know he'd encourage me in his aloof yet gentle way to keep at it.
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tomk
King of OTD
Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 1,559
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3864617 - 03/03/05 07:31 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Ahem.
I'm sorry, Elle. I think you are wrong in a way that reveals John Luc does not belong in your profile. Elle does not belong to a culture that has discovered warp drive technology. As a starship Captain, Picard is obligated to follow the prime directive. The prime directive, um, directs that no interference is to be brooched upon cultures that have not discovered warp drive technology. Ergo, Picard would be neither aloof nor gentle, and would not issue any advice. Were it in my power, I would rip the image out of your avatar, you obviously are faking star trek fandom.
It might be good to continue your break for a few more days and then re-evaluate where you are at. Then, you can re-learn your relationship with pot by treating it with the respect it deserves. When you smoke tons of it, it doesn't like that. When you use it in directed ways (to enhance nature, art, life) it does like that.
Really though, I don't think pot is a great treatment for ahedonic symtpoms. It has low side effects but makes the condition bearable. Maybe a lot of the people who quit become more motivated to treat their ahedonic symptoms.
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"I am eternally free"
Edited by tomk (03/03/05 08:09 PM)
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Psychoactive1984
PositiveCynicist
Registered: 02/06/05
Posts: 3,546
Loc: California, Monterey Coun...
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3864760 - 03/03/05 08:04 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Well, personally, everyone self medicates to a degree, it's the degree to which you self medicate that is the issue at hand. The importance of this, is to find the reaoning to the self medication, not get rid of the form.
If you're happy (which I believe you are by the nature of your original post) with using, then don't stop yourself. But, never blame a drug on your issues, just like someone who is fat can't blame the food for their dilemma, or an alcoholic can't blame the alcohol, or a pr0n addict can't blame the pr0n (had to type pr0n).... the issue most certainly isn't the substance, it's the bahavior and the feeling that you associate it with.
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"Their is one overriding question that concerns us all: How can we get out of the fatal groove we are in, the one that is leading towards the brink?" Albert Szent-Gyorgyi
"We may not be capable of eradicating the corruption of reason, but we must nevertheless counter it at every instance and with every means." Dan Agin
"Politics is the best religion and politicians are the worst followers."
-It's ok to trip as long as you don't fall.
-Substance over Style.
-Common sense is uncommon.
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TinTree
thread killer(semi pro)
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Posts: 1,456
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Last seen: 15 years, 15 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Psychoactive1984]
#3865515 - 03/03/05 10:36 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Today marks a week without pot for me.
I feel good, I wake up feeling alert, and I accomplish more during my day. I am starting to feel creative again while sober; that, for me, was the worst side effect: while I was very creative while high, as soon as I was sober again I couldn't think of a single damned idea. This was becoming a problem, as a design major.
Keep it up, EllemyShade!
You likely need some sober time to consider the role of marijuana in your life, whether for medicinal, recreational, creative, or spiritual purposes. I find that many (non-recreational) cannabis users do not consider dosage carefully enough in their use. One or two hits of fine buds in the morning (particularly sativa-dominant strains) may brighten your day and make you more alert and mindful, energized for work, exercise, or active pursuits. On the other hand, hitting the bong at noon is likely a recipe for a day spent eating potato chips, watching daytime television, and napping.
In any event, going on hiatus from weed provides a new perspective. Cannabis is a psychedelic, and just like mushrooms or acid, you don't want to abuse it, or you will find yourself in a lonely, confused, depressed, or otherwise unpleasant headspace. In the meantime, go for a bike ride, or paint a picture, grow a plant, play an instrument, learn a dance, or do whatever it is that puts the magic in your life.
Best of luck!
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"I'm afraid of losing my obscurity. Genuineness only thrives in the dark. Like celery."
- Aldous Huxley
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3866012 - 03/04/05 01:02 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
tomk said:
Ahem.
I'm sorry, Elle. I think you are wrong in a way that reveals John Luc does not belong in your profile. Elle does not belong to a culture that has discovered warp drive technology. As a starship Captain, Picard is obligated to follow the prime directive. The prime directive, um, directs that no interference is to be brooched upon cultures that have not discovered warp drive technology. Ergo, Picard would be neither aloof nor gentle, and would not issue any advice. Were it in my power, I would rip the image out of your avatar, you obviously are faking star trek fandom.
Well, in my mind I'm on his starship with him, in a different time and place.
Thanks guys.
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tomk
King of OTD
Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 1,559
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3866705 - 03/04/05 05:50 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
EllemyshShade said:
Well, in my mind I'm on his starship, locked in his private chambers, and the captain, who is part borg, is servicing me with his enhanced borg bits, in a different time and place.
Anyhow,
I didn't smoke any pot yesterday. I woke up and feel like I smoked a shit ton before I went to bed last night. It sucks to not smoke but I quit because I stopped getting high. I smoked an bowl at work and I couldn't tell if I was high or not. So, time for a breather.
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"I am eternally free"
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Divided_Sky
Ten ThousandThings
Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 3,171
Loc: The Shining Void
Last seen: 15 years, 13 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3867820 - 03/04/05 12:58 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
tomk said:
I'm sorry, Elle. I think you are wrong in a way that reveals John Luc does not belong in your profile. Elle does not belong to a culture that has discovered warp drive technology. As a starship Captain, Picard is obligated to follow the prime directive. The prime directive, um, directs that no interference is to be brooched upon cultures that have not discovered warp drive technology. Ergo, Picard would be neither aloof nor gentle, and would not issue any advice. Were it in my power, I would rip the image out of your avatar, you obviously are faking star trek fandom.
Don't listen to this guy.
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1. "After an hour I wasn't feeling anything so I decided to take another..."
2. "We were feeling pretty good so we decided to smoke a few bowls..."
3. "I had to be real quiet because my parents were asleep upstairs..."
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freddurgan
Techgnostic
Registered: 01/11/04
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3868539 - 03/04/05 03:17 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
tomk said:
I smoked an bowl at work and I couldn't tell if I was high or not. So, time for a breather.
Yeah it is.
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: freddurgan]
#3877490 - 03/06/05 01:59 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Whew, what a crazy weekend!!
I spent the past few days at a cabin on the lake with my in-laws and husband. We all took an eigth of mushrooms and had a great time! I had a chance to reevaluate my life and all that stuff. Coming down, everyone was smoking, but I didn't give in! I simply said, "no thank you," and that was that. I did do some whippits with the shrooms.
So wow, I feel great. No toking for almost a week...can't believe it's almost been a week! The 3rd day was the most difficult...almost had a nervous breakdown or something. But now I LOVE being sober. Love it. I can make it the rest of the way for sure now. I feel so alert and I have so much energy it's ridiculous.
Thanks for the encouragement! It REALLY helped!
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3882418 - 03/07/05 12:28 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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After my great day, I ended up toking the weed.
I went 6 days, so I thought "I deserve it." That's the thought that gets me every time.
But this morning I have such a pot hangover that I think it wasn't worth it.
At least I know now. I'm going for at least 7 days this time. Step by step.
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Sterile
mushroom lover
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Last seen: 13 hours, 23 minutes
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3883098 - 03/07/05 02:59 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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lol! Ummmm,well, you must saturate yourself with THC untill your thirst for weed vanishes completely.
Use it untill you really don't feel like using it anymore. Its the only way to see things vividly.
The truth lays on the edges.
It is foggy between the edges,. It is better to experience 100% of what each phaze has to offer you.
Only then, you can benefit the most out of your experiences.
Live your life-break your limits-don't perpetuate mildness
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The Source Of The Force
Is The Power Of The Mind
"if you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove." - timothy leary"
Anno: "-I can do anything with those clouds!"
Annos Tek
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question_for_joo
i'm left. youall can bite me
Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 1,591
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3883752 - 03/07/05 05:44 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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I knew you were high when you made your post about sailboats. I knew it. I knew it just from reading it.
I'm so disappointed in you Michelle. Nah, come on, I'm just kidding... It's a good lesson to learn I think, this thing, is that writing something, typing out a promise, it doesn't help one iota. It's just as useless as a spoken promise. The promise has to be made from deep down in a firey heart, and renewed every minute you got the opportunity to partake. It felt soooo good I bet, that stone after 5 days in exile, feels like heaven. And then you say to yourself eh fuckit, I'll just really start...right...now, and you laugh at yourself in a skitzophrenic sort of way.
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youi was a pig informatnt so you can go fuckyoruselfs
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: question_for_joo]
#3883969 - 03/07/05 06:28 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
question_for_joo said:
I knew you were high when you made your post about sailboats. I knew it. I knew it just from reading it.
I'm so disappointed in you Michelle. Nah, come on, I'm just kidding... It's a good lesson to learn I think, this thing, is that writing something, typing out a promise, it doesn't help one iota. It's just as useless as a spoken promise. The promise has to be made from deep down in a firey heart, and renewed every minute you got the opportunity to partake. It felt soooo good I bet, that stone after 5 days in exile, feels like heaven. And then you say to yourself eh fuckit, I'll just really start...right...now, and you laugh at yourself in a skitzophrenic sort of way.
haha! No, I actually wasn't high when I made the sailboat post...although I might have still been feeling my buzz from last night.
I am trying to take baby steps here with weed!
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question_for_joo
i'm left. youall can bite me
Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 1,591
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3884003 - 03/07/05 06:36 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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you sounded so enthusiastic, you must've at least been high when you were watching yer sailboat movies, or thinkin about yer sailboats. hehe. anyway. I still love you. The babysteps idea might work for you. Then again it might not.
My suggestion would be leave it out of your control. Put it in a lockbox, give yer hubbie the key, and tell him to ration you one nug a week. YOu can always beat him up and steal the key like a crack fiend if the cravings get too intense 
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youi was a pig informatnt so you can go fuckyoruselfs
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: question_for_joo]
#3884058 - 03/07/05 06:50 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
question_for_joo said:
you sounded so enthusiastic, you must've at least been high when you were watching yer sailboat movies, or thinkin about yer sailboats. hehe. anyway. I still love you. The babysteps idea might work for you. Then again it might not.
My suggestion would be leave it out of your control. Put it in a lockbox, give yer hubbie the key, and tell him to ration you one nug a week. YOu can always beat him up and steal the key like a crack fiend if the cravings get too intense
Yeah, when I watched White Squall I was incredibly stoned.
Maybe it is time to lock it up and throw away the key.
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question_for_joo
i'm left. youall can bite me
Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 1,591
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3884143 - 03/07/05 07:14 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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It's the best cause no matter what it is you watch it really puts you into the world, lets you focus your imagination on being there along with the characters. Obviously it's especially fun if it's a world that appeals to you. I've watched sports stoned that I have absolutely no interest in while sober and I've been transfixed. I've watched golf stoned, for like half an hour or more. Golf.
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youi was a pig informatnt so you can go fuckyoruselfs
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niteowl
GrandPaw
Registered: 07/01/03
Posts: 16,291
Loc:
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3884421 - 03/07/05 08:21 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
EllemyshShade said:
It bothers me to think that this might be my natural sober state, this depression. Blah, makes me remember why I started smoking habitually to begin with. Weed did wonders for my moody personality.......
.....But that is part of the problem too, because the old anxiety is hitting me hard. I'm irritable. Maybe I am just freaking out about it too much. Who knows. I don't. It's annoying that I feel so bummed out and I know that toking a bit of weed would make me feel so much better.
OMG!!!!!!
I feel the EXACT same way every time I have tried to quit.
I also think this has some merit....
Quote:
EllemyshShade said:
You bring up a lot of points for me to consider. Yes, I do think I was self-medicating. I've been on pharms before for mental disorders and I got so sick of the endless search for the perfect drug with no side-effects that I just gave up.
I especially like this point you made:
Quote:
It sounds like your problem might be you are self medicating with pot but not treating it like medicine.
I think you might have hit the nail on the head...
When I tried to quit smoking cigs, I tried many different ways. The one that worked for me was to start rolling my own cigs. Bought some Prince Albert, rolling papers and a little cheap "rolling machine". I had to change the "habit" of smoking into something else.
I have tried this with pot and it did not work.
I have began to look at it this way.....it is like a "spiritual" challenge.
Pot is a VERY tempting plant for me............VERY
When I get weed.....I have no control over myself. I will smoke the equivalent of 3 joints per day untill its gone....regardless of how I try to "pace" myself.
Its the same way with anything I truly enjoy...wine, chocolate candy, gum......these things are ubertempting to me.
I/we have to learn how to NOT be tempted.
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Live for the moment you are in nowDon't be bogged down by your pastDon't be afraid of what lies in your future
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: niteowl]
#3884581 - 03/07/05 08:55 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
niteowl said:
I/we have to learn how to NOT be tempted.
I agree, but it's SOO incredibly difficult. I simply have NEVER learned how to moderate myself with *anything*. (not just pot)
I can't just get rid of all the pot we have, because my husband still smokes. I will never ask him to quit for my sake, since he works a stressful job and uses weed to help him unwind from the work-day. It would be a lot easier if I had no weed in the apartment, but unfortunately I am tempted everytime my husband tokes up. He doesn't toke every day, but just about.
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niteowl
GrandPaw
Registered: 07/01/03
Posts: 16,291
Loc:
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3884885 - 03/07/05 09:42 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Couldnt he at least smoke in another room?
Not right in front of ya.......
I dont know......
Maybe he has been put there to help you beat the "temptation demon"
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THE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3885728 - 03/08/05 01:30 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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To be totally honest with you I am on the same path myself. My abuse of bud has led me to quit smoking. I am sure I will have a couple tokes here and there but after a week and a half of non-smoking I am already starting to feel a little more clear-headed then before. I am sure it will take a couple more weeks to feel totally clear headed however I am in it to win it.
It is hard the first few days however there is nothing a couple drinks won't take care of. A couple beers and a couple tylenol's or vicodin's if you have them will def. help you sleep at night while trying to quit smoking. Since I quit smoking bud I have been drinking a lot more then I used to. I have found that bud has more of a negative effect on your mind where as alcohol has a more negative effect on your physical body.
Yes I know I am substituting one for the other but I would rather feel clear headed then shitty physically.
Just my opinion on the matter.
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m00nshine is currently vacationing in Maui. Rumor has it he got rolled by drunken natives and is currently prostituting himself in order to pay for airfare back to the mainland but he's having trouble juggling a hairon addiction. He won't be back for a long while.
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baraka
Registered: 07/15/00
Posts: 10,768
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
#3889637 - 03/08/05 09:05 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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id much rather be a daily smoker then a daily drinker.
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This is the only time I really feel alive.
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THE KRAT BARON
one-eyed willie
Registered: 07/08/03
Posts: 42,409
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: baraka]
#3889784 - 03/08/05 09:42 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Not me my friend.. However more people would agree with you than myself on that debate.
Do you agree that a couple drinks a day is less cloudy on your mind but worse on your physical health than say a couple crammed bowls a day?
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Gomp
¡(Bound to·(O))be free!
Registered: 09/11/04
Posts: 10,888
Loc: I re·side [primarily] in...
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: THE KRAT BARON]
#3892027 - 03/09/05 09:40 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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i don't get it.. would quiting weed, be like, quiting sex? :P
i just wanted to air the thought. i dont stand by it.
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Disclaimer!?
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Tasty_Smurf_House
Stranger
Registered: 08/20/03
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3892284 - 03/09/05 10:43 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Don't worry. It's not like you have to quit forever. I used to smoke like a fuckin chimney. Had extra money that I got for free, didn't have to work for it, always high.
Anyways, I find drugs can be much more fun in moderation. Binging is fun too, but if it's going to going on for longer then a week you might start running into trouble. I find that doing drugs occasionally makes them more fun. Also your tolerance will go down, and you get fucked up a lot easier.
Good luck with everything.
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Divided_Sky
Ten ThousandThings
Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 3,171
Loc: The Shining Void
Last seen: 15 years, 13 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Tasty_Smurf_House]
#3896269 - 03/10/05 12:55 AM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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Welly Ellemy, I guess you have discovered the weed hangover. Use that as an incentive to cut back.
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1. "After an hour I wasn't feeling anything so I decided to take another..."
2. "We were feeling pretty good so we decided to smoke a few bowls..."
3. "I had to be real quiet because my parents were asleep upstairs..."
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headmix4u
Stranger
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Divided_Sky]
#3907690 - 03/12/05 02:28 PM (18 years, 3 months ago) |
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I am trying to start on the journey of letting go of the weed also. I have been in a cloud for a long time. I went to visit family over in Thailand and i was unable to get weed i was growing through it.The trip was 35 days. I smoked for 11 years and the longest I stop was 2 weeks i think I can't even remember. long story short. I felt like a new man, when I came home to the USA. I did not smoke for 3-4 months My second year in business as a Lawn service and i was doing great waking up on time running with the wind... some where I lost that spirit, and started smoking yes work was allot more fun .. Some how i started missing payments on bills money was a problem, but i still made ends meet. but for some reason i just keep putting things off choirs cleaning its like I need speed pills or something... reflection on this time last year which i was on a airplane coming home from Thailand.. i did not feel this way.
30 days with out smoking there is a difference in life it is much better, I did experience it once
??? Do i wanna go cold turkey I love weed. If i make a goal board can i smoke less and less instead of all day. 1 time a day which i am at now to every other day till 3 days and so on till i stop completely or once on special times, like when some really good kind bud's in town lol Sorry about the long post but like i seen others do it really does help to make a post and let it out. i feel much better. Thanks Shroomey
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: headmix4u]
#3934301 - 03/18/05 06:30 AM (18 years, 2 months ago) |
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Update:
I have FINALLY found something that keeps me away from weed.
Cleaning.
Seeing something that was previously messy and disorganized become orderly and clean by my own hand gives me the same sort of bone-deep contentment and satisfaction that smoking does.
I've cleaned out drawers and cupboards in my apartment that haven't seen the light of day in more then two years. I've mopped and vacuumed like a madwoman for the past 24 hours.
And spent several hours on the treadmill, cleaning out my body as well.
I'm pacing myself though. I don't want to run out of stuff to clean.
I slipped up these past two weeks, smoking everyday again, but that was before I found my secret weapon: cleaning.
Now I am SURE I can go a period of time without weed. Cleaning is an awesome distraction and makes me more motivated to do other stuff, like read, write and exercise.
I feel fantastic, to be honest. And I realized something else while running my brains out on the treadmill: the only thing stopping me from feeling good and healthy without weed is....ME!!!
What an earth-shattering realization, eh? I knew it inside that it all depended on me, but I needed to re-realize it again.
I have the power!
Wish me luck. I'm striving for 7 days this time without weed.
And my apartment is going to SPARKLE INSANELY WITH CLEANLINESS in the meantime.
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Kerr
Who else would I be
Registered: 02/05/05
Posts: 1,611
Loc: My roots in the Koots
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: MOTH]
#3934752 - 03/18/05 09:03 AM (18 years, 2 months ago) |
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Good on ya Ellemy
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"Easy going and organic thoughts bent on self experimentation and knowledge and growth for the betterment of self and those around us"
-Playdo the philosophiser
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tomk
King of OTD
Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 1,559
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Kerr]
#3936428 - 03/18/05 03:58 PM (18 years, 2 months ago) |
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Hahaha
In my apartment, it's more like smoking is the cure for cleaning.
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"I am eternally free"
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Scolecite
enthusiast
Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 348
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: tomk]
#3936826 - 03/18/05 05:28 PM (18 years, 2 months ago) |
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i just quit too after a horrible flu last weekend. Right now I am dying for a joint. I dont want to drink either becuase then Ill just develop a problem with that and I really dont want to drink I just have to get high somehow.
I feel terrible, I cant do anything I normally do while high. Surfing the net isnt fun anymore and Im just forcing down movies to pass the time.
FOr me it was my life. Now I am having to reinvent my life.
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freddurgan
Techgnostic
Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 11 years, 16 days
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Re: Refinding my path - letting go of the weed. [Re: Sterile]
#3937671 - 03/18/05 08:43 PM (18 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Sterile said:
lol! Ummmm,well, you must saturate yourself with THC untill your thirst for weed vanishes completely.
Use it untill you really don't feel like using it anymore. Its the only way to see things vividly.
The truth lays on the edges.
It is foggy between the edges,. It is better to experience 100% of what each phaze has to offer you.
Only then, you can benefit the most out of your experiences.
Live your life-break your limits-don't perpetuate mildness
This is a good reply. I have tried to stop just because I figured I should stop, or maybe I felt guilty, or something. I dunno. But I'm not done with pot yet. When I -really- want to give it up I will. It's not hard to quit if you really want to.
If you *really* want to. Not because you feel guilty.
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