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Offlinedistortion
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Registered: 12/11/02
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Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
how to get some goods into jail?
    #3814641 - 02/22/05 01:37 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

SWIM is going to have to spend a small amount of time in the big house. They wanted to get some sleeping pills inside there to kill the time...has anyone successfully sneaked stuff into the slammer? I've heard of ppl taking a condom or baloon and knotting it off and swallowing it... but I'm not sure how safe that would be... and if it would come out or maybe get stuck in the intestines or something? I don't think they have the willpower to stick anything up their bum :eek:, eh I don't even wanna think about it. So, does anyone have any ideas how to sneak in some sleepy pills? There's got to be some way... :confused:


--------------------
Think for Yourself. Question Authority.

-Timothy Leary


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InvisibleZippoZM
Knomadic
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Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: distortion]
    #3814700 - 02/22/05 01:47 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

well from what i know they cannot fuck with your legal documents or your bible.

one option would be to extract the active chemical, and lay it on a lawyers business card, you could probably get quite a few doses on a card. and then have it mailed to you.


--------------------
PEACE

:mushroom2:zippoz:mushroom2:



"in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption"

"People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."


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Offlinediscoabe
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Registered: 03/26/04
Posts: 674
Loc: Nevada
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: ZippoZ]
    #3814724 - 02/22/05 01:51 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

How many days is "a small amount"? If they catch you smuggling shit into a jail they'll string you up by your balls, it's not worth it. He'd have a better chance getting shit from someone in there. The only exception is what was mentioned before about dosing a letter or something.


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Offlinephishman
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Registered: 10/10/00
Posts: 25
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Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: distortion]
    #3814824 - 02/22/05 02:10 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

I wouldn't risk it. That'd be an automatic felony if they find it on him. There are a several ways to sneak in drugs. However, it would be difficult and practically impossible if this is just a week long stay or something. Best bet is that there will be plenty of "goods" already in the pen. Why not leave it to the pros? Probably gonna be expensive, but what do you expect. If this is like a 3 or 6 month term, you can PM me and I can give you some ideas, otherwise just have to count sheep.


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"Most people are walking in their sleep, turn them around, start them in the opposite direction and they wouldn't even know the difference."

-Captain Alfred M. Hubbard


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Offlinetoasty1
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Registered: 01/02/05
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Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: phishman]
    #3822109 - 02/23/05 02:18 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

In your pooper


--------------------
If it bleeds for a week...dont trust it


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OfflineVertigo6911
Entheobotanist
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Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: toasty1]
    #3822693 - 02/23/05 04:25 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

dude just get some1 to send over sigarettes and barter for it...
if any of those movies i saw is even 5% accurate theres more goodies inside then out here...


--------------------
-Know ye not that ye are gods?-
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InvisibleVvellum
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Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 10,920
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: distortion]
    #3831265 - 02/25/05 02:29 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

what kind of jail?

I regularly visit someone in a federal max. prison. they randomly search every few visitors. they scan everyone with some sort of wand sensor that detects marijana, cocaine, heroin, etc.

they dont fuck around.

oh, and dont be retarded and swallow a balloon full of sleeping pills. you never know if it would rupture or get stuck. do you want to be known as the guy who died with a stomach full of sleeping pills that were being smuggled into jail so that some other dude could...sleep? not worth the risk.

you friend will be able to get drugs in prison just fine. you do not need to send anything. believe it or not, the drug trade is alive and well in many prisons.

there is also pruno for him to drink.


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Offlineguest23
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Registered: 10/24/04
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Last seen: 12 years, 4 months
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Vvellum]
    #3833693 - 02/25/05 06:06 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Um, he could just tell his doctor he has sleeping problems and get prescription meds.


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InvisibleVvellum
Stranger

Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 10,920
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: guest23]
    #3835431 - 02/26/05 01:56 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

prison doctors and healthcare are underfunded, understaffed, and over-booked. They probably wouldnt even bother with someone who simply complains about no sleep. "No sleep? So what? Get out of the way while we treat this guy who just got stabbed in the neck with a shiv." The individual I know in prison had an extreme hernia. He was put onto a 3 week long waiting list, and even then the treatment was as minimal as you can get. Follow up treatment was non-existant.

I dont think this is an option.


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OfflineCiv
Pinning
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Registered: 10/14/04
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Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Vertigo6911]
    #3853680 - 03/01/05 08:03 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

dude just get some1 to send over sigarettes and barter for it...
if any of those movies i saw is even 5% accurate theres more goodies inside then out here




Many California prisions have started banning smokes at all, and in county jails. Like dude said, you gotta keester that stuffs.

If your doing drugs in jail, they came outa someones ass. Less you have some weird movie style prison guard drug hookup, or you baloon them like a crazy ass and wait to poop.

I have had prisoners that are working on the freeways here come up to me at gas stations and shoulder tap me to buy them some tabaco. Then they go to the shitter and well, you know the rest. I mean like two bags at a time ...


--------------------
"...Gal's seem to hate the thought of blending chicken shit in a blender.
So, wash it well afterwards & DON'T tell them..."  -Agar


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Offlinedonkey_lipz
journeyman
Registered: 07/27/04
Posts: 173
Last seen: 6 years, 2 months
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Civ]
    #3854452 - 03/01/05 11:14 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

plow your poop shoot with the parcel.


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InvisibleVvellum
Stranger

Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 10,920
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Civ]
    #3855025 - 03/02/05 01:29 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

they put packs of cigarettes up their assholes?


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Offlinediscoabe
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Registered: 03/26/04
Posts: 674
Loc: Nevada
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Vvellum]
    #3855645 - 03/02/05 04:25 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

I think he meant pouches of tobacco, like you'd use to roll your own. A friend of mine is a guard at indian springs here in Nevada and he tells me all the time about drugs going on in there.


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InvisibleVvellum
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Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 10,920
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: discoabe]
    #3857293 - 03/02/05 02:54 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

just checking


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Invisibledblaney
Human Being

Registered: 10/03/04
Posts: 7,894
Loc: Here & Now
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Vvellum]
    #3857575 - 03/02/05 04:09 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

bi0 said:
there is also pruno for him to drink.




Yeah that looks beyond disgusting. Probably toxic too.


--------------------
"What is in us that turns a deaf ear to the cries of human suffering?"

"Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword"
- John Mayer

Making the noise "penicillin" is no substitute for actually taking penicillin.

"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or their revolutionary right to dismember or overthrow it." -Abraham Lincoln


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OfflineBlashpherion05
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Registered: 02/28/05
Posts: 97
Last seen: 13 years, 3 months
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: dblaney]
    #3857896 - 03/02/05 05:20 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

everything comes from someone ass.


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InvisibleVvellum
Stranger

Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 10,920
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: dblaney]
    #3860652 - 03/03/05 02:13 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

pruno is like the courvoisier of the prison world.


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InvisibleLouiseLouise
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Registered: 11/02/04
Posts: 3,898
Loc: Searching w/my good eye c...
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: Vvellum]
    #3861427 - 03/03/05 09:33 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

bi0 said:

they dont fuck around.


oh, and dont be retarded and swallow a balloon full of sleeping pills. you never know if it would rupture or get stuck. do you want to be known as the guy who died with a stomach full of sleeping pills that were being smuggled into jail so that some other dude could...sleep? not worth the risk.

you friend will be able to get drugs in prison just fine. you do not need to send anything. believe it or not, the drug trade is alive and well in many prisons.

there is also pruno for him to drink.




Well put  :werd:  you need 5 more shroomies :thumbup:

but, if it was prescribed prior, he would recieve them, right?, or at least, one could have them sent, not to say they would arrive at all :tongue:


--------------------
"That's why you get in close to them, and then take the picture!! Don't be a pussy!" ~CC


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OfflineFirstAvailable
enthusiast
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Registered: 02/14/04
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Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: LouiseLouise]
    #3861511 - 03/03/05 10:12 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

this is all well and good, but something everyone seems to be missing.

The real question is, does your friend really want to be all sleepy and groggy while in the pen. What happens when your friend falls asleep in a precarious position, and some mean looking black dude comes walking by with his 12" friend?


Why not just send him some cigs, so that he has something to barter when his anal virginity is on the line. And if he cant barter for it, at least he'll have something to smoke when the deed is done.


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InvisibleLuvWallyWorld
Slack-jawedgawker

Registered: 11/15/04
Posts: 112
Loc: Midwest
Re: how to get some goods into jail? [Re: FirstAvailable]
    #3870504 - 03/04/05 11:52 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

FirstAvailable said:Why not just send him some cigs, so that he has something to barter when his anal virginity is on the line.




hey don't go around assuming we're all anal virgins here  :tongue:


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