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Ok, so i was on something at the time
but its that point when all the static noises around you pulse and you are able to focus on it and slow the pulse down until it stops at one point and you feel as though everything is focused... and everything is coming from one central idea. cause i will do this, and when it happens it scares the shit out of me... i can feel my heart go from steady to racehorse pace in a matter of a beat. is that infinity? it feels like finding infinity in one moment. where i focus on everything in that one second's time, lock it in my brain and stay there until it desorts and scares me and i have to shake it off and return to take in the next second. i was sitting outside this morning and i swear, each time i came to some realization, everything around me quickened... the pulse of all the static noise, the (annoying) squawk of birds, my heart rate... some sort of helicopter/ plane noise... i could not tell if it was my mind mathing the sounds or the sounds matching my mind.
then i thought about how easily everything can be fabricated in your mind... how 5 sensations can be created by your mind and make you feel as though you are somewhere where you are not... then i thought about how that was scary because then i do not know what my reality actualy is and no one knows what reality is because we all distort the world in our minds... then i realized the same car had driven by slowly 3 times now and i felt as though i were stuck in a loop...
so then i sat here and wrote a bunch of stuff down hoping to gain some sort of grasp on sanity... and i do feel better now...
too busy with living to live
good job, you are one step closer to enlightenment. you should make up something for this experience. who knows, maybe it is a gift! try to keep the (whatever it is youre doing) steady. you might be a step in evolution!
-------------------- the little kridders of nature; they dont know that thyre ugly!