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InvisibleThirdEyeOpening
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Why i havent broken through?
    #3308203 - 11/02/04 10:04 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

Ive never truly broken through, ive gotten pretty damn close with shrooms tho. Im coming to realize i havet on shrooms (or salvia for that matter) because in the aferglow of a ego loss trip, i say im different and that it changed my way of thinking, but the next day, or next week, nothing. Im thinking now as i write that, when we are unwilling to let go of our egos, we dont have faith that we will find the way. I feel this way mainly due to the fact that when i hear the word faith or anything close to it, the first thing that pops into my head is a bible thumper. While i know that those who speak of ego loss arent bible thumpers, the principle is the same. They speak of taking a dive on faith to see the truth. Ive been hurt badly by faith, thats why i dont have much any more. Mainly religious faith, i cant belive in someting that isint tangeble to the concious mind. This may sound a little shallow, but i cant belive in something that relies on faith entirely. I think thats my biggest obsticle for my own ego loss, that if i do lose my ego, that i still wont find truth. I dont know if i could take much more loss in my faith. The only two reasons i havent commited suicide is my parents and the faint hope i have that maby ill find some faith. Im running out of places to find faith. Currently its that one day soon im outa here, Im dippin out to the woods, and not turning back till i find myself. Im holding onto my ego because i dont have much else? Man, that hurts. But its good to get off my chest, if only some of it. I dont know enough about myself to put my deepthoughts into words, What i have just written is only a drop in the ocean. One day i jus hope, with all of it i have left, that i will find me, and where i need to be.


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Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity. Im not too sure about the former.      -Einstein

Of course the rules need to be enforced, but the goal of law and order should be to create a just society, not to enforce laws. -Unknown

“I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.”  -Stephen Roberts


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InvisibleHuehuecoyotl
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: ThirdEyeOpening]
    #3308261 - 11/02/04 10:22 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

No breakthroughs will occur while intoxicated. Entheogens can merely give you a glimpse...a valuable thing...but the breakthrough will occur when you are ready.


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"A warrior is a hunter. He calculates everything. That's control. Once his calculations are over, he acts. He lets go. That's abandon. A warrior is not a leaf at the mercy of the wind. No one can push him; no one can make him do things against himself or against his better judgment. A warrior is tuned to survive, and he survives in the best of all possible fashions." ― Carlos Castaneda


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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you will heal through [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #3308299 - 11/02/04 10:37 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

What ever it is about your parents, that keeps you from making the last bad mistake, I like it!

Mistakes are natural, and recovering from error is the most normal state that you will find yourself in.
Doing it with dignity (recovery from error that is) is an art, and doing it with enough humor to help others in their journey is a gift - a terrific gift worth sharing. ( it is a goal supportive of living in the moment and - beleive it or not, freedom form egoic domination )

As for ego loss, and truth, this is the area of almost continuous error recovery. Since everything is changing always, attuning to this happenning is the closest we come to handling the truth. This kind of knowledge is already inside of you, and from time to time you will realize it, and shine for others. Some will get it, others wont.


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OfflineGomp
¡(Bound to·(O))be free!
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #3308305 - 11/02/04 10:39 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

While i know that those who speak of ego loss?

hum... lose the ego to who? it? :P


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3308335 - 11/02/04 10:51 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

i think that we always return to some form of ego as long as we live in a physical body. its unavoidable, we need an ego to experience life, and the life experience is a meaningfull one, so its not beneficial to just break out of it, not before our times.

rather the spiritual quest should be to change the ego for the better and also decrease our reliance on it. As well as becoming more aware of the things going on within and outside us.

as for breaking through on psychadelics, i advise at least a week of preperation, which should involve lots of reading on spiritual subjects, meditation and body detoxing. this ingrains in your mind that the upcoming trip is about enlightenment, not fun. the trip tends to take the things youve been loading into your brain and then present them to you in a much more powerfull synthesized way. the result can be a potent new understanding of reality


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Everything I post is fiction. This poster is no longer active.


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: ThirdEyeOpening]
    #3308365 - 11/02/04 11:02 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

Why do you believe in "breaking though"? Did it help Jim Morrison? Loss of consciousness or complete disassociation on entheogens is the body being chemically overwhelmed and will NOT bring you great wisdom.

Get involved in positive things: social life, work, physical activity, hobbies. Strive to be as healthy and wealthy as possible.

The things you are looking for cannot be searched for directly.


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The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Swami]
    #3308380 - 11/02/04 11:07 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

"Get involved in positive things: social life, work, physical activity, hobbies. Strive to be as healthy and wealthy as possible"

this is what i mean when i say seek to modify your ego, to be more positive and effective, rather than seeking to lose it entirely

:thumbup:


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Everything I post is fiction. This poster is no longer active.


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Offlinefireworks_godS
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #3308411 - 11/02/04 11:15 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

The main point is not to dissolve one's mind and sense of self entirely, it is to stop identifying with it. It is about consciously experiencing the pure awareness in every moment. Its about keeping that center at all times, that unchanging, observing awareness. The mind will still run, one still has the sense of self, this is our nature - the point is to not identify with the mind, and also to let it run only when necessary.

Its more about your state of being than anything. Are you constantly aware that you are alive, breathing, perceiving, observing? Do you know how you feel? :grin:

:headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :satansmoking:
Peace. :mushroom2:


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:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you

:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:


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OfflineGomp
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: fireworks_god]
    #3308497 - 11/02/04 11:37 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

""we need an ego to experience life""

why? we need nothing? :P do you have to breath? or are you breathing? is there not a difference?


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Offlinevessel
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3308534 - 11/02/04 11:48 AM (12 years, 1 month ago)

I've noticed that lots of the people on this forum (not all) talk about living with their parents. These same people all seem whiny and self-involved. Is this just me?


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InvisibleBuddahKillah
U WANTFITE!?!?!?!?!?!

Registered: 10/15/04
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3308641 - 11/02/04 12:25 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Gomp said:
""we need an ego to experience life""

why? we need nothing? :P do you have to breath? or are you breathing? is there not a difference?




You do not have to breath. You do have to breath to live though. So, the reason you are breathing is to stay alive.

Why do you want to stay alive? Is the reason conscious or subconscious or both?


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OfflineGomp
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: BuddahKillah]
    #3308645 - 11/02/04 12:26 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

""You do have to breath to live though""

why?

define living? :P


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InvisibleBuddahKillah
U WANTFITE!?!?!?!?!?!

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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3308658 - 11/02/04 12:31 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Gomp said:
""You do have to breath to live though""

why?

define living? :P




:rolleyes:  You first.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3308704 - 11/02/04 12:46 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

"The main point is not to dissolve one's mind and sense of self entirely, it is to stop identifying with it. It is about consciously experiencing the pure awareness in every moment. Its about keeping that center at all times, that unchanging, observing awareness"

this just about sums it up. Brilliantly summarized .


""we need an ego to experience life""

"why?"

well, gompo, the reason is that experience is perception. we experience what we percieve. And all perception is relative, you see, hear, feel, taste and smell relative to yourself. and since the ego is the sense of 'yourself' without it you have nothing to experience relative to, and thus no experience of life

"These same people all seem whiny and self-involved. Is this just me? "

yes, it probably is just you.


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Everything I post is fiction. This poster is no longer active.


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Swami]
    #3308719 - 11/02/04 12:50 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Swami said:
The things you are looking for cannot be searched for directly.




being involved with good things is good, but searching for what you need (and only you can tell what it is) has to be done.

the indirect approach can work, all approaches accumulate and become your unique path or journey.

some of the fancy goals are not in themselves what you need, but they may be on your path, good luck in your searching.


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OfflineGomp
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: redgreenvines]
    #3309206 - 11/02/04 02:55 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

""the reason is that experience is perception.""

what if experience is experienceing perception?
you do not need to say anything? you do?


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3309269 - 11/02/04 03:11 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Gomp said:
""the reason is that experience is perception.""

what if experience is experienceing perception?
you do not need to say anything? you do?




experience includes perceptions, also feelings, also sensations, also thoughts and memories of perceptions, feelings and sensations.

you will first get sensations (which may feel pleasurable, painful or indifferent)
perceptions come after some sorting or filtering

in being perceptive, one seeks and finds or perceives what one was looking for. (attitude is a dynamic filter)

perception is what gets through on the input side of the attitude mask, and other sensations can be completely ignored by the prevailing attitude mask

if one's prevailing attitude seeks something that is not there, the other sensations will be ignored and the world can in that way seem quite dark, or empty or BORING.

a big thing to fix in attitude is to open up the filters, thus seek more kinds of things, and even learn to operate at times without perception filters, letting sensation rollercoaster away.

One could say that in seeking truth they seek what is happenning now; and so they might practice a kind of zen meditation that is full mind listenning to all channels on all senses and not reacting to anything.
Bare awareness.

In a way this is truth, this is also non-egoic since all attitudinal reacting and all attitude input filters are off.


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OfflineGomp
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: redgreenvines]
    #3309755 - 11/02/04 04:56 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

letting experience rollercoaster away? :P


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Offlinedeff
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Re: Why i havent broken through? [Re: Gomp]
    #3309820 - 11/02/04 05:05 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

"that if i do lose my ego, that i still wont find truth"

"You" won't :wink:

The awareness will wash through your perception. It escapes words, obviously.

I agree that purposely trying to reach these states is not the most productive method. What is your desire for this state? Catch my drift...?


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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"that if i do lose my ego, that i still wont find truth" [Re: deff]
    #3309934 - 11/02/04 05:21 PM (12 years, 1 month ago)

right, the state is not the goal (a temporary thing anyway)
but yearning for it helps shape the direction of the path.

one's personal path is everything.

finding one's path and transcending one's habits are often connected and they relate to being a seeker of something undefined.( whereas seeking the predefined adds to excess of filtered perceptions, rigidity and ultimately boredom...)


Edited by redgreenvines (11/02/04 05:21 PM)


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