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I see I can convey a false image or impression, as It is not the one "in my mind" the reader "get in mind" I can only answer honestly, since i do not know, and prefer to ask. im confused, just doing some sorting I kinda feel like anything but silence is lies. I can only lie, as the truth is individual?
i once wrote down the phrase 'i am a hypocrite' and found it later, only to be confused about what i was talking about.
i think i meant that no matter what i say, i will most likely say something contradicting at a later date. there's really nothing i can do to help it, since i'm constantly growing, and unless i'm always silent (like you said) then i'm gonna be a hypocrite all the time.
personally i say don't worry about it. i agree with you about thinking that the only true 'me' is the one in my mind.
i'm on dxm right now, so sorry if answered a question that you never asked.. and i'm sure when i come down, what i wrote will probably all be lies, so nyeh......