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SpecialEd
+ one
Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 6,220
Loc: : Gringo
Last seen: 8 years, 11 months
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How many people are
#3173656 - 09/24/04 03:40 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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deadlocked in life because they are struggling with themselves?
-------------------- "Plus one upvote +1..." --- // -- /l_l\/ --\-/----
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Mong
A little bit lade da
Registered: 09/04/04
Posts: 52
Loc: The land where it always rains...
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: How many people are [Re: SpecialEd]
#3173829 - 09/24/04 05:13 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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Yeh that is my mental situtation at the moment, i just keep argueing with myself about my own self worth, where im going with life, i also feel empty inside like theres a void were my life should be, when i think about it ive always felt kind of empty or invisable but recently this feeling has increased since using weed, i think I might have depersonlsation disorder, but I haven't been diagnosed with anything so thats just my own speculation, but iv'e always felt kind of empty and in the background like I don't have a self, a self is something I understand but don't experience as strange as that sounds, im just hoping that this is just a stage im going through in my life and that eventually i'll have a sense of self and security that I once had(when young).
-------------------- I believe that the moment is near when by a procedure of active paranoiacthought, it will be possible to systematize confusion and contribute to the total discrediting of the world of reality. - Salvador Dali
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psyka
Praetorian
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 1,652
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Re: How many people are [Re: Mong]
#3173873 - 09/24/04 06:04 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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Sounds like you consciously believe you should quit using mary jane, so you should for a few months. When you were a child, did you have this imaginary concept of "life direction" ? Simply live and be comfortable with it. Natural direction and oppurtunity will come to you based on the decisions you make, unless you wish to run in the rat race then I'd suggest going to college for the purpose for buying lots of things. Remove self-doubt and let self-confidence resurface.
-------------------- As the life of a candle, my wick will burn out. But, the fire of my mind shall beam into infinite.
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Mong
A little bit lade da
Registered: 09/04/04
Posts: 52
Loc: The land where it always rains...
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: How many people are [Re: psyka]
#3173890 - 09/24/04 06:25 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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I have quit smoking dope as it wasn't the same enjoyable expierence as it used to be, ergo it made me paranoid and delusional because I used to try and get into trances and stuff like that, without really preparing my self mentallly before doing so, so it blurred my perception of reality and fantasy, now I think a certain amount of escasim is fine but I went too far and lost my sense of who I am, where i'm going with my life etc, Im also working on my self confidence but I think it's going to be a long drawn out battle as iv'e always always been self critical to the extreme and even though I know the stupidity of such a mindset, I always seems to automatically be negative about my self.
Quote:
When you were a child, did you have this imaginary concept of "life direction"
Not particulley but I felt more grounded as a person, basically because my mind wasn't so jumbled up but I guess that's what happens to a lot lot/most people going through their teens.
-------------------- I believe that the moment is near when by a procedure of active paranoiacthought, it will be possible to systematize confusion and contribute to the total discrediting of the world of reality. - Salvador Dali
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lovelight
float
Registered: 08/27/04
Posts: 368
Loc: yellow submarine
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Re: How many people are [Re: Mong]
#3173906 - 09/24/04 06:45 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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Monq... by being aware of your negativity, insecurity and emptiness you are already half way to solving the problems, because it sounds like you give it a lot of thought.. What you need to do is find practical ways to help yourself develop and improve. But the method needs to suit you. Do you have people close to you you can talk to? or have you tried meditation? If you can pinpoint aspects of your life that make you unhappy you can work on changing them, for example the particular drugs, or an environment or person etc. And do get a check up to see if you do have any disorders.. But try to be more specific as to the things contributing to your current mindframe, don't just give in to the general negativity... your life is in your hands!!! Oh and stick to S&P! things said here touch on all aspects of life, it has already greatly influenced me in most positive ways!
-------------------- Turn on your lovelight, let it shine on me
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mr crisper
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Registered: 07/24/00
Posts: 928
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Re: How many people are [Re: lovelight]
#3173914 - 09/24/04 06:52 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Monq... by being aware of your negativity, insecurity and emptiness you are already half way to solving the problems, because it sounds like you give it a lot of thought.. What you need to do is find practical ways to help yourself develop and improve.
nice post, lovelight - i estimate being aware of the problem is 90% of the solution. that is just my perspective tho.
practical way - find something creative you love doing and get really good at it, even if it takes years and years.
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Mong
A little bit lade da
Registered: 09/04/04
Posts: 52
Loc: The land where it always rains...
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: How many people are [Re: lovelight]
#3173921 - 09/24/04 06:59 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Do you have people close to you you can talk to? or have you tried meditation?
Well most of my friends have gone off to uni and im still at home cos im still at college, but I do find it hard to open up to people and talk about how im feeling, emotions etc etc, but im working on opening up about how I feel etc etc, I do meditate quite requarly and find it helps, I think im quite natrual too it actually as I find my self drifting away from myself and feeling bliss sometimes when I can meditate really deeply, I think perhaps through my smoking of weed my mind has been elevated somehow , because I can imagine things so very clearly in my mind and can meditate on my self very deeply, but I still have this horrible feeling of emptyness.
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But try to be more specific as to the things contributing to your current mindframe, don't just give in to the general negativity...
I know the things which contribute to my negativity is im kind of finding it hard to come to terms with myself cos im bisexual and in my teens I was always trying to deny myself etc etc and it's made my mind a bit of a jumbled mess, I also used to get teased and this has I think contrbuted to me having a negative self image.
-------------------- I believe that the moment is near when by a procedure of active paranoiacthought, it will be possible to systematize confusion and contribute to the total discrediting of the world of reality. - Salvador Dali
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Tasty_Smurf_House
Stranger
Registered: 08/20/03
Posts: 8,657
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 12 years, 8 months
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Re: How many people are [Re: SpecialEd]
#3173933 - 09/24/04 07:04 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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I've been having a rough time because everything in my life kind of collided, and I wanted to do too many things and I had to figure out what was important to ME! I've had people telling me what I should do or be doing, like my dad, and I wanted money so that I could buy stuff and I started working more hours at work but then I had to sleep a lot and I lost all the time that I needed to hang out with friends and play my music and that's what is important to me so I've decided to find a different job that accomodates me better, and spend more time doing what I love.
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cleaner
Stranger
Registered: 04/02/03
Posts: 508
Last seen: 19 years, 4 months
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Re: How many people are [Re: Mong]
#3173998 - 09/24/04 07:42 AM (19 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Mong said: I have quit smoking dope as it wasn't the same enjoyable expierence as it used to be, ergo it made me paranoid and delusional
Thats mistake number one pot smokers make. Weed should be used to enchance ALREADY fulfieled and stable life. If you haven't got that its like filling jar with sand only in this post.
http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat...;o=&fpart=1
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