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InvisibleLoosifa
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Registered: 05/26/04
Posts: 506
Loc: England (South) Flag
I've got a tripping dilemma.
    #3163702 - 09/22/04 07:26 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

let's get this straight:  I love to trip.  I'll trip whenever I can, money and circumstances permitting.
My partner does not like to trip.  He gets irritated and anxious, and it makes him feel ill.
We have been together for about 13 years, a very long and stable, loving relationship.  I love him very much, and don't want to leave him.
Here's the problem.  We have a mutual friend we have both known for loads of years; he loves tripping too, so we tend to trip together.  We both really get off on it, and laugh ourselves silly, and have lots of adventures exploring our local gardens, heaths and beaches.
Now, this is not a sexual relationship... the most physical we get is to hug after the journey, or pick each other up if one falls over, etc.  But our friendship is doing my partner's head in, and sometimes he does mushrooms just to be there so we are not alone together, if you see what I mean.
I've gone over and over this in my head, and, while I don't want to stress my partner out, am doing nothing wrong morally with our friend, and don't want to give our friendship up. 
Has anyone else gone through this situation?  Can you give any advice or tips?  We are planning an enormous breakthrough trip for Thursday (100g EACH!!!  That will be amusing!), but I don't want to feel uncomfortable, and I certainly don't want to upset my partner.
:confused: :mushroom2: :confused:


--------------------
LURK


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InvisibleSociety
Pizza Guy

Registered: 07/03/04
Posts: 13,939
Loc: Eating pizza
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163717 - 09/22/04 07:54 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Talk it out with your partner.


--------------------
Delicious Pizza


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InvisibleLoosifa
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Registered: 05/26/04
Posts: 506
Loc: England (South) Flag
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Society]
    #3163723 - 09/22/04 08:02 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

We have talked it over, so at least now I know I'm not imagining it. He doesn't want to stop me being friends, it just really bothers him that he can't enjoy it in the same way. He's agreed to stop taking mushrooms as a die hard answer... maybe this will help, if he doesn't have the intensified feelings to deal with.


--------------------
LURK


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Offlineagr8fulchick
Feed Your Head!

Registered: 08/19/04
Posts: 707
Loc: Stranded in Iowa
Last seen: 4 years, 11 months
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163821 - 09/22/04 09:29 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Awww, that is sad! Poor guy :frown: I know what it feels like to be left out of things like that, and it sucks! Maybe he can still go with and just not trip? He can always be the designated babysitter :smile: Or maybe he can be less-than-sober in a different way? Maybe there is another substance that he can really enjoy tripping on (doesn't have to be that extreme though). Try to involve him with your trips in some way, even if he doesn't take mushrooms with you. Best of luck!  :smile:


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InvisibleFecalDildo
Fat LadiesBingo.
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Registered: 04/25/04
Posts: 9,645
Loc: Ass Flavour Pie Factory.
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163832 - 09/22/04 09:34 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

:smile:


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Invisiblegoobler
Reanimated
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Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 02/24/03
Posts: 48,909
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163838 - 09/22/04 09:36 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

maybe he isnt upset about a sexula encounter...but more about your mental connections being made with each other while tripping...to me thats far more intimidating that an little poke


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InvisibleLoosifa
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Registered: 05/26/04
Posts: 506
Loc: England (South) Flag
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163860 - 09/22/04 09:46 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

oh, it's all so complicated! We have tried the shroomless sitter thing, but my partner just gets down regardless. This has an uncomfortable effect on my trip... I end up feeling like I'm doing something wrong.
Trouble is, he's more drawn to opiates. Also, me and my friend are both on Prozac, which adds an extra bond.
My partner has promised to make an appointment to see a doctor about his growing depression. Lots of things are bothering him, not just this particular thing.


--------------------
LURK


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OfflineSilven
I trip,therefore weare.

Registered: 08/30/04
Posts: 2,071
Loc: El Mexicano
Last seen: 10 years, 8 months
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163862 - 09/22/04 09:46 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

I've went through this type of stuff before, though I can't say I was in the relationship for 13 years.  I'd say I was only with the girl for almost 2 years.

She began trying to regulate who I got high with, and was extremely jealous of her cousin (HER COUSIN) because we got high together, because "she" refused to smoke it with me.  But she would get high when I wasn't there.  Needless to say I think she was a bit mentally unstable and I ended up cutting my losses and moving on.

I don't think I would advise you to do the same, as I'm sure you and your partner have been through a lot together in 13 years (Congratulations!) and can probably handle this as well with a bit of sensible talking and reassuring him that you are his.  If it comes down to giving up tripping, or getting rid of him... I'm afraid I couldn't tell you which to choose.  If it were me and my current relationship, I'd probably choose to lose my partner, and keep my mushrooms (lol, don't tell her that), but as I said, I doubt I would if I had invested 13 years of my life into a relationship with someone I love whole heartidly.

Just my two cents,
- Silven :mushroom2:


--------------------
Born: 10/31/83, which makes me a Scorpio.

1) Scorpios are the most highly sexed of all the signs of the zodiac.
2) Scorpios are prone to excesses: booze, drugs, sex, bad puns, etc.
They usually exploit the weaknesses of others, who fall victim to
their capacity for total lust & sexual abberation.
3) Scorpios possess great intellectual curiosity & creative talent. They
think they are rebels & are arrogant, proud, conceited, and worth every
penny of it.

What do you bring to the table?


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Offlinerancid
Shroomful
Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 4
Loc: Down
Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: Loosifa]
    #3163864 - 09/22/04 09:47 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

well. i had once a truly platonic relationship with someone i used to trip with alot. and i spoke to my partner and explained that tripping with people will make you share a close bond with them, but not sexuality. the journey together is that overwhelming. just assure.


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InvisibleLoosifa
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Registered: 05/26/04
Posts: 506
Loc: England (South) Flag
Re: I've got a tripping dilemma. [Re: rancid]
    #3163877 - 09/22/04 09:56 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

thanks, everyone, for replying. This has seriously been doing my head in, and it really helps having someone neutral to talk to about it.
Hopefully, reassurance will do the trick. Or a good dose of SSRI's!!!!!!
Luckily, we hardly ever argue. We will get it sorted.....


--------------------
LURK


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