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OfflineScolecite
enthusiast

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 348
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
How do you stop someone that does things for attention?
    #3157036 - 09/20/04 05:43 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

EDITED:
There is this guy where I play drums as part of a community. A drum circle. We play in public, and its a mix of regulars and the public. He plays the same thing week after week. DING, DING. Everyone hates him. Everyone has asked him to stop. The more you ask him to stop, the more he does it. Problem is everyone there is too nice, and dosent want to cause problems (becuase we are adults), so nothing has been done and everyone just puts up with it. It has been going on for a year, and I thought it was funny at first, but now I realise what a dick this guy is.

My question to you is, how do you make him stop, becuase the more you give attention to him the more he takes, and he just keeps on it? Its literally like showing up to band practice for a year, and the guitar guy plays the same 2 notes for 2 hours. Its beyond annoying, but whats worse is I dont know him, so I can't have a heart to heart with him.(not that I think he would understand, becuase like I said it was done before even by people that know him so....)

So we have to solve this without violence or threats. But this is a VERY serious post, and I dont want any stupid ideas, but real solutions.

thanks

Edited by Scolecite (09/20/04 09:27 PM)

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Offlinefelix
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/20/00
Posts: 10,503
Last seen: 8 days, 17 hours
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3157144 - 09/20/04 06:13 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

call the cops on disturbing the peace..? old people always get the cops to come over if the music is too loud and he's playing music. that's all i can think of really.


--------------------
Real botanists laugh at HPS systems, we do however use high pressure sodium in the parking lot. - artthug

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OfflineMAGnum
veteran

Registered: 07/08/04
Posts: 2,421
Last seen: 12 years, 3 months
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3157161 - 09/20/04 06:17 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

I have had this problem with a girl who was psychotic in the mental hospital. This woman would dog people and target a certain someone and just annoy them all day.

I found in the end, simply ignoring the person like they don't exsist works best.

But what makes a little music so bad? do they need lessons or something?


--------------------
Agent 727
7

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OfflineScolecite
enthusiast

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 348
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: MAGnum]
    #3157179 - 09/20/04 06:20 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Everyone is trying to ignore him, but he just keeps doing it and its ruining the drum circle.

Like I said its like someone playing 2 notes on the guitar in the same time signature and in the same spots for 2 hours straight. You wanna kill him. And it changes the beat you want to play. He knows hes an asshole too. Its not like hes doing it honestly.

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InvisibleFucknuckle
Dog Lover

Registered: 04/24/04
Posts: 6,762
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3157327 - 09/20/04 07:02 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

First, all of you, as a group, need to inform this guy just how it is.

Then , as a group, you need to play music he can't keep his beats too.

Very simple you tell him to leave, then play what he won't or cant.

Keep it up everytime you can............He will get it.

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Invisiblesir tripsalot
Administrator

Registered: 07/09/99
Posts: 6,487
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3157482 - 09/20/04 07:40 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Oh my god, is this a thread about drum circle etiquette? I gotta start going to different websites more often.


--------------------

"Little racoons and old possums 'n' stuff all live up in here. They've got to have a little place to sit." Bob Ross.

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OfflineDreamer987
The VerbalHerman Munster
Female

Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 5,326
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: sir tripsalot]
    #3157634 - 09/20/04 08:13 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

sir tripsalot said:
Oh my god, is this a thread about drum circle etiquette? I gotta start going to different websites more often.




please do, if you don't have anything to contribute. That said
the other day we were having a nice hack going. Everybody in the grove, so this one guy keeps trying to use his head, but the sack keeps getting stuck in his wedlocks (whitemans-dreadlocks)
we tried to be nice about it at first, but he kept doing it. So we said look man, your wedlocks are getting in the way of the hack.
well he did it again so we made him take a time out under the tree to think about what he did.
after a doob he was ready to get back in the game


--------------------

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OfflineScolecite
enthusiast

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 348
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Fucknuckle]
    #3157930 - 09/20/04 09:17 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Fucknuckle said:
First, all of you, as a group, need to inform this guy just how it is.

Then , as a group, you need to play music he can't keep his beats too.

Very simple you tell him to leave, then play what he won't or cant.

Keep it up everytime you can............He will get it.






ALL HE PLAYS IS A DING-DING at the end of each measure!!!! IT fits with everything! ITs just 2 notes, it fits with EVERYTHING trust me.

We have asked him to stop and he wont. He dosent see that hes doing anything wrong, but really he is an attention whore.

Edited by Scolecite (09/20/04 09:25 PM)

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Invisiblepsyka
Praetorian
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Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 1,652
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3158078 - 09/20/04 09:44 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Have you tried laughing?

Try laughing at the stupid nature of his joke :smile: Really, try it.

Just might be crazy enough to work.


--------------------
As the life of a candle,
my wick will burn out.
But, the fire of my mind
shall beam into infinite.


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Invisiblesir tripsalot
Administrator

Registered: 07/09/99
Posts: 6,487
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Dreamer987]
    #3158888 - 09/21/04 01:01 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Wow, you guys are hacky sacking nazi's. That's coo.


--------------------

"Little racoons and old possums 'n' stuff all live up in here. They've got to have a little place to sit." Bob Ross.

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Offlinefelix
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/20/00
Posts: 10,503
Last seen: 8 days, 17 hours
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: sir tripsalot]
    #3158909 - 09/21/04 01:09 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

oh my god...Ha!

before you edited your post, it seemed like it was just some dude next door playing music too loud and annoying the whole community or something.


--------------------
Real botanists laugh at HPS systems, we do however use high pressure sodium in the parking lot. - artthug

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OfflineScolecite
enthusiast

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 348
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: felix]
    #3159105 - 09/21/04 07:38 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

I want to laugh and point, but then its more attention in his direction

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InvisibleFucknuckle
Dog Lover

Registered: 04/24/04
Posts: 6,762
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3159470 - 09/21/04 11:27 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

EDIT: You have made the choice to play in public. Leave the guy alone or play in private.

Do have the right to tell a person to take a shower if they smell very bad at the store?? Do you have the right to ask someone to stop walking all over town with 400 piercings?? No you can't.

So after your edit. You have no rights here dude. Suffer, enjoy or work it out.

Move your jam. You cannot expect anyone to stop in a public gathering. Now your just being selfish.

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OfflineHarveyWalbanger
Demiurge
Male

Registered: 06/24/02
Posts: 3,076
Loc: 8b
Last seen: 1 month, 24 days
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3159929 - 09/21/04 01:16 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Move the circle for 4 or 5 weeks without telling him?

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Anonymous #1

Post deleted by Anno [Re: HarveyWalbanger]
    #3160057 - 09/21/04 01:46 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)


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Invisiblesir tripsalot
Administrator

Registered: 07/09/99
Posts: 6,487
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3161319 - 09/21/04 06:07 PM (19 years, 6 months ago)

I bet the guy owns one of the local businesses in the area. Clever son of a bitch.


--------------------

"Little racoons and old possums 'n' stuff all live up in here. They've got to have a little place to sit." Bob Ross.

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InvisibleLoosifa
none
 User Gallery

Registered: 05/26/04
Posts: 506
Loc: England (South) Flag
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3163770 - 09/22/04 07:07 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Get to know this bloke.  Teach him other things to play.  Be honest with him in a reasonable way.  Ask yourself:  why does he come to the drum trips?  Better still, ask him.  Have two drum trip places, one where he goes, and one where he doesn't go.
It is difficult, if everyone feels like a protocol is being broken.  But there is more than one way to skin a cat..... make it your mission. :thumbup: :grin:


--------------------
LURK

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OfflineLocus
Male

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 03/11/04
Posts: 6,112
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3163794 - 09/22/04 07:20 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

As a few others said already.. All the group members together at once must confront him and tell him to stop. All TOGETHER vs him. If you did that, which im not sure if you did all together or not. I think you said you did. SO THEN...you and the rest of the group must move the meets to different times or places without telling him. This is just about your only option. Take it or leave it. And this isn't a bad option either. Easy. You can still have the regular meet where he would come if you really want, and make it less frequent or something. but have the frequent meets at other places and times. Easy easy :smile:


--------------------

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity. ~ Albert Einstein
"Fear is the great barrier to human growth." ~ Dr. Robert Monroe



~~~*Dosis sola facit venenum*~~~

*Check my profile to listen to my music* :smile:

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OfflineCaRnAgECaNdYS
Tool's groupie
Female User Gallery

Registered: 04/09/04
Posts: 11,505
Loc: Billy Howerdel's closet Flag
Last seen: 8 months, 21 days
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: ]
    #3163922 - 09/22/04 08:19 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Fiend said:
Quote:

HarveyWalbanger said:
Move the circle for 4 or 5 weeks without telling him?







:thumbup:


--------------------

The secret to being funny is to say smart things stupidly, or is it stupid things smartly? Whatever..it's not rocket surgery...or something like that.

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OfflineMikeOLogical
Doctor ofShroomology
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Registered: 01/30/04
Posts: 4,133
Loc: florida
Last seen: 4 years, 11 months
Re: How do you stop someone that does things for attention? [Re: Scolecite]
    #3163965 - 09/22/04 08:43 AM (19 years, 6 months ago)

we need more cowbell!

what i would do, is get everyone together, and have everyone strike their drums in rythym with his ding ding...

or, alternately, everybody bring a bag of rotten tomatoes, and everytime he goes ding ding, everybody pelt him with a tomato...

I can just about guarantee he won't come back again if he goes home covered in rotten fruit...


--------------------
We got Nothing!
we're no longer selling jars.  :laugh:

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