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Invisiblekaiowas
mndfrayze'speppet urme
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Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,498
Loc: oz
your love without fear
    #3110175 - 09/08/04 10:22 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

i still wonder now...why can't I go up to a regular person, any person, and have a casual conversation with them?

what I see most of the time when I'm going out trying to chat with strangers, is there is a hesitation. sometimes it freaks some people out, and other times a weird look is given my way. like it's taboo to talk to strangers (wait, that's what we were told as children in school for our own protection). but that idea is still engrained in our heads.

to me, a lot of societies ills could be helped by one simple idea, and that is unconditional love.

a love without ego

a love without fear.

cause love shouldn't have a price for anyone. putting conditions on love undermines the whole idea in the first place. and yet, just for the simple task to talk to another person, many freeze up.

if we put conditions on people it means they have to do something in oder for us to love them...instead of love with ego, have unconditional love...love without fear.

without fear that you are giving something up. that if your love isn't returned, then that your love is worthless. that your love needs to be met, when love is free.

don't own love, embrace it


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.---senior doobie


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Offlinedeff
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3110198 - 09/08/04 10:27 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Woah I just wrote an essay on how our instilled morality and self created paranoia sperates us from outside groups of people, pretty much the same idea. Instead of typing a reply, I might as well just paste a relevant section :smile:

"This human trait is not only visible during times of war, but is present in everyday life as well. People feel secure and safe around people they know best, such as one?s parents, which is contrasted by feeling scared or threatened around strangers. I feel this comes from the fact that we take comfort in predictability, and those unknown to us appear less rational and understood, which leaves open the possibility of spontaneous and unconventional actions. This, coupled with our inherit tendency to fear the worst, is a barrier that separates groups and inevitably leads to conflict. This can be observed in all social interactions, as people communicate much more often and openly with others they know rather than strangers. Even our word for ?strangers? denotes this sense of uncertainty, as we consider them to be strange, or unknown to us.

Another delusion that I feel aids in our tendencies to make enemies is our system of morality. Our own sense of morality is instilled within us from our birth ? and can be found everywhere in society, especially those areas most vulnerable to developing minds ? religions, schools and the media. What complicates this is that our sense of morality comes only from the social group we are raised within, and therefore differences of morality emerge between different groups of people. Rather than accept our differences, the strong moral conditioning leads many to believe that they are objectively ?good? whereas the enemy is objectively ?evil?. Keen presented this idea with his reference to an enemy seen as an enemy of God, although I feel this should be expanded to an ?enemy of good?, as the same righteous blindness can be found among the non-religious.

In order to move forward as a society and end our inability of peaceful coexistence, we must work on finding our own faults rather than support the propaganda of the ?evil enemy?. When we each realize that we are the creators of our own fear and paranoia, I feel that war will be a thing of the past."


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InvisibleSkorpivoMusterion
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3110207 - 09/08/04 10:29 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

i still wonder now...why can't I go up to a regular person, any person, and have a casual conversation with them?

Well, I believe this social quirk would depend much on the location. For example, countryville small-town types of places will have much more openly welcoming individuals than say, New York City.

As for me, I am somewhat asocial and introverted, hence I don't find much interest in walking up to strangers for a sudden-urge conversation.. but if someone comes up to me, I'll naturally be affable and such, depending on the other individual and so on.



--------------------
Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death, and sweet as love.


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Offlinethelion
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Re: your love without fear [Re: deff]
    #3110326 - 09/08/04 10:49 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

deff said:
Woah I just wrote an essay on how our instilled morality and self created paranoia sperates us from outside groups of people, pretty much the same idea. Instead of typing a reply, I might as well just paste a relevant section :smile:

"This human trait is not only visible during times of war, but is present in everyday life as well. People feel secure and safe around people they know best, such as one?s parents, which is contrasted by feeling scared or threatened around strangers. I feel this comes from the fact that we take comfort in predictability, and those unknown to us appear less rational and understood, which leaves open the possibility of spontaneous and unconventional actions. This, coupled with our inherit tendency to fear the worst, is a barrier that separates groups and inevitably leads to conflict. This can be observed in all social interactions, as people communicate much more often and openly with others they know rather than strangers. Even our word for ?strangers? denotes this sense of uncertainty, as we consider them to be strange, or unknown to us.

Another delusion that I feel aids in our tendencies to make enemies is our system of morality. Our own sense of morality is instilled within us from our birth ? and can be found everywhere in society, especially those areas most vulnerable to developing minds ? religions, schools and the media. What complicates this is that our sense of morality comes only from the social group we are raised within, and therefore differences of morality emerge between different groups of people. Rather than accept our differences, the strong moral conditioning leads many to believe that they are objectively ?good? whereas the enemy is objectively ?evil?. Keen presented this idea with his reference to an enemy seen as an enemy of God, although I feel this should be expanded to an ?enemy of good?, as the same righteous blindness can be found among the non-religious.

In order to move forward as a society and end our inability of peaceful coexistence, we must work on finding our own faults rather than support the propaganda of the ?evil enemy?. When we each realize that we are the creators of our own fear and paranoia, I feel that war will be a thing of the past."





Great post deff. Can you post the entire essay? I know that may be a wierd request but I really liked what you have to say.


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OfflineBleaK
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3111556 - 09/09/04 02:22 AM (12 years, 3 months ago)

i read a while ago u were strolling around your town, (which happens to be my town) striking up convos with ppl.

maybe u'll see me someday :wink:
bet itd be a fun convo.


--------------------
"You cannot trust in law, unless you can trust in people. If you can trust in people, you don't need law." -J. Mumma


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InvisibleApril
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Registered: 05/14/04
Posts: 94
Loc: Maryland
Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3112130 - 09/09/04 04:24 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

"that if your love isn't returned, then that your love is worthless."

That got me all teary eyed.  :crying:  I'd have problems with that my whole life.  I've always had problems with rejection, and it does indeed stem from childhood, but in a different way from "Don't take candy from strangers."  My father left us when I was young, and I've noticed that I've clung to men in my life that aren't good for me, just as long as they stay.  I've been breaking this pattern recently, though...  But I do think it's a fear of rejection that keeps us from expressing our love so freely.  How do you get over rejection besides just loving yourself?


--------------------


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Invisiblekaiowas
mndfrayze'speppet urme
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Re: your love without fear [Re: April]
    #3112190 - 09/09/04 04:43 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

there are a bunch of ways we can look at it.  the first thing is to realize that we all have or will experience this in our lives.  I may not know your type of suffering as I know you will never know mine, but in the end we still suffer the same. this allows for a deeper feel for acceptance. acceptance is of the biggest keys to unconditional love, because in order for a person to not judge themselves or others, they must first learn to accept themselves and others.

it all stemmed from a quote by ken keyes "you do just as much damage when you take offense as when you give it."  to me that was a very powerful quote, because it allowed me to take responisbility for my feelings.  in other words, it isn't reality making me feel negative, it how I responded to every situation that determined how I felt.  so a paranoid person lives in a paranoid world, as is the same logic for a happy person.  so taking control and responsibility of your feelings would be another way.

hehe so yeah, love yourself, and love others, love life, and be in awe that you can share and experience.  :heart:


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.---senior doobie


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InvisibleSimisu
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3112363 - 09/09/04 06:11 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

in other words...

smile and the world will smile with you!


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OfflineZoso_UK
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Registered: 08/14/04
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3112400 - 09/09/04 06:49 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

the only people who smile back to me on the streets where i live (London...) are old ladies... once one of them said to me that if everyone in the world got in to the habit of smiling at each other then the world would be a much better place.

but most of the people around my area would see it as a sign of weakness and since my brother's have been mugged i'm naturally cautious.

still love the old ladies! little pepper pots that they are :smile:


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Offlinelovelight
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3112473 - 09/09/04 08:28 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

By 2006 the #1 cause for depression in Australia will be loneliness, and i'm sure the situation is similar in many countries... and yet we are not doing anything to improve the connection with our fellow humankind. the world's population is 6.3 billion, so loneliness should be impossible!

although fear of human contact starts with childhood teaching, for practical reasons such as personal safety, the obscure nature of such ideas can easily develop a suspicious, and inhibited character. i think a lot of people reason "if i just keep to myself, there is less chance of trouble, embarassement, hurt." but even these things are just temporary transitions, and in the long run good experiences.  but many new inventions of the modern lifestyle are contributing to make things worse. The atmosphere of fear brought on by terrorism paranoia, the impersonal nature of technological advances, etc.

What we need is a REVOLUTION!!!!! We need to change the norm of social interaction on a daily basis and make LOVE WITHOUT FEAR the only lifestyle choice!

It sounds naive, but I am positive it would be easier than one might think. People are often surprisingly willing to open up if you make the first move, and with a pure heart. I have been thinking about such a 'revolution' for a while, and am hoping to come up with an actual physical plan by getting people involved, even if it starts on a small scale (like Kaiowas, leading by example). Will let you know how it goes, and i would love suggestions!

Love to you all!!!  :heart:

Great thread, Kaiowas. Its good to have the proof that there are other people are thinking about this in the same way.


--------------------
Turn on your lovelight, let it shine on me


Edited by lovelight (09/09/04 09:16 AM)


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InvisibleAbstractHarmonix
Love is like a train...
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Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 3,509
Loc: The Sea
Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3112782 - 09/09/04 11:19 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Kaiowas...

Very soon will we run into eachother, without hesitation, ego, and assumption and simply subscribe to eachother's vibes. :smile:
I have enjoyed reading this thread. It is always nice to know that there is at least a hand full of people with bright, unlimited souls and hearts.

BTW - I have started my travels.  The van is up and kickin and I have been scootin' around this town, Live Oak.  Dont know how long I should stay here.  I always come back here, to the Spirit of Suwannee. But Cali, it calls me.  Very soon, for your birthday bash.

Hmmm public libraries are sweeeeeeeet! :smile:

Your initial post reminds me of my latest painting. With the loss of the ego, our entity together, spirals in harmony.  Being based solely around the 3-11 sun sign vibration, I was liberated.  through this painting I had proven to myself...Ego?

Im in you and you're in me.

Spirit take me home.
-Ares


--------------------
A plethora of music aspirations control my temptations of future revelations beyond "now". The percussion, and the heart beat of my love and devotion. The rhythm goes beyond, prying into the third eye, releasing the creativity held so far inside. The melodicies, through the out of tune pianos and broken classical guitars...there lies a beauty. A beauty as prevelent as the fire inside. To release these energies is pure ecstacy, to deveop these gifts is sacred. The vocality, so pure as can be, shying away from herself, lies within me. For the underlying serenitity, this is what I live for. I plea for harmony, and nothing more. Music equals love. Creation of love leads to the procreativity of the World, and it's spirals and puddles prevailing.


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OfflineFrog
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3114369 - 09/09/04 05:26 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

I talk to people every where I go. If they give me a strange look, I don't notice it. I think most people don't mind being engaged in conversation with a total stranger. I think people probably like to talk to other people, but maybe they also feel afraid of approaching a total stranger. I have been in Starbucks, and each person it sitting by themselves or in groups of 2 or 3, and I've gotten everyone engaged in conversations with each other. I pretty much have no embarassment about anything.


--------------------
The day will come when, after harnessing the ether, the winds, the tides, gravitation, we shall harness for God the energies of love. And, on that day, for the second time in the history of the world, man will have discovered fire.  -Teilard


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OfflineMad_Buhdda_Abuser
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3115373 - 09/09/04 08:53 PM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Everyone we've ever known have been strangers to us at some point in time...People are paranoid of other's now adays because of the media. Were told to believe that all strangers are evil psycho rapist's/murderer's, when in reality were all pretty much the same. The secular world we live in embraces this paranoia. Dark times we live in...

PEACE MBA


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OfflineZahid
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3116231 - 09/10/04 12:06 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

a love without ego




The words immortalized by the Sufis, "Love is a furnace and ego its fuel,"

:thumbup:


--------------------


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OfflineTodcasil
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Re: your love without fear [Re: kaiowas]
    #3117679 - 09/10/04 08:46 AM (12 years, 2 months ago)

story:

when i was working in retail at a register, i made a point to smile at everyone, despite my presumptions about them.

sometimes, instead of telling someone to have a good day, i would tell them to have a safe day....

one particular customer, a middle aged women, responded rather quickly saying "what do you mean?" i was taken off guard, but i continued the dialogue, "you know, have a safe day, be careful on the roads try not hurt anyone, or yourself." i felt satisfied with my response.

but she came to a completely different conclusion... she responded "OH, you mean like, be careful who you smile at? yeah, i will have a safe day."

she walked off and left me baffled.

be careful who you smile at? ive smiled at every single person ive come into eye contact with since.

even while stopped at a stop light (which is a little wierd) but i smile, and it somehow destroys this privacy barrier one "thinks" they have while driving in a car.

smile everbody.

peace


--------------------
Men look at themselves and they see flawed humans, we look at women and we see perfect
GODDESSES
Women look at themselves and they seem utterly human, when looking at men they see proud
GODS.


~Casil



:cactus:


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General Interest >> Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology

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