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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,359
Loc: In the jungle
Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house
    #3058280 - 08/27/04 03:15 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

I have a problem saying "no" to people. Whenever someone asks me for something or asks me to do something and I don't know them very well, it's impossible to say no.

Because I feel unable to say no, I'm stuck playing D&D again. I just wish I could have the balls to say, "No, I don't want to play anymore." The reason I can't say no to D&D is:

They play in my apartment, so I'll feel like a prisoner here unless I play. The apartment basically has a living room/dining room/kitchen large area, and a bedroom. So if I stop playing, I'll be stuck in the damn bedroom while five guys take up my living room space and eat all the food in the kitchen. And if I venture out of the bedroom when I'm not a player, everyone (except hubby of course) gives me the cold shoulder, acting like I'm the outsider even though it's MY apartment with my husband.

My husband says just to stop playing if I don't want to, but it's not that simple for the reason I mentioned.

I just feel trapped and annoyed. I hate people coming over to the apartment when I don't want them to. The problem is that Kevin truly does enjoy playing D&D and there is nowhere else for this smelly group of people to meet.

Grr. I'm just venting by the way.


*me*


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OfflineLightningfractal
Nutcase

Registered: 06/24/03
Posts: 14,899
Loc: Heaven and Hell
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058298 - 08/27/04 03:21 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Hit a bar!


--------------------
Hi how's it going, wanna kick Heroin basically painlessly on your own, in your own house, without any government "help" ,or the "help" of a crazy condescending, judgmental medical doctor? Read this:

https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php?Cat=0&Board=42&Number=7342616&page=0&fpart=all



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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,359
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: Lightningfractal]
    #3058307 - 08/27/04 03:23 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Bars scare me. I can only go if I'm with people I'm comfortable with.

I feel pretty pathetic at this moment in time. I wish I could be an ADULT.


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OfflinePhishgrrl
Walking in thetall trees...
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Registered: 05/03/04
Posts: 5,079
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058313 - 08/27/04 03:25 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

You can come hang out with me. Seriously though, could you go to a book shop, coffee house or a library or something? That's the kind of place I go when I have time to myself.


--------------------
Once in awhile you can get shown the light

In the strangest of places if you look at it right...



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OfflineBigNerd
Sociable loner
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Registered: 10/31/03
Posts: 4,228
Loc: local elementary school
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058323 - 08/27/04 03:28 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

EllemyshShade said:
I feel pretty pathetic at this moment in time. I wish I could be an ADULT.




Bah. Being an adult just means doing the stuff that needs to be done but nobody wants to do.

If they give you shit in your apartment, threaten to kick them out. You'll only have to follow through once, and I bet you anything they'll be better behaved next time. Trust me, I know nerds.

BN


--------------------
Sometimes karma needs a little help.


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OfflineBarbi
Plastic Person

Registered: 04/22/02
Posts: 12,976
Last seen: 12 years, 1 month
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: BigNerd]
    #3058331 - 08/27/04 03:30 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

you should order a stripper without telling them.

Fill her in to act 'like just a friend' then get slowly naughty with the boys..


I bet they will stop the D&D :wink:


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OfflineLightningfractal
Nutcase

Registered: 06/24/03
Posts: 14,899
Loc: Heaven and Hell
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058334 - 08/27/04 03:30 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Well, the way I see it you have 4 options.

#1 Tell them to leave as politely as you possibly can. Tell them that you just need your space back in your own place.

#2 Ask your husband to do it for you. ^^^

#3 Figure out somewhere else you can go to get away from it, if not a bar then perhaps a shopping mall, restaurant, or friend's house.

#4 Just try to learn to deal with it.

It's your house, so it probably all depends on how strongly you feel about them being gone.


--------------------
Hi how's it going, wanna kick Heroin basically painlessly on your own, in your own house, without any government "help" ,or the "help" of a crazy condescending, judgmental medical doctor? Read this:

https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php?Cat=0&Board=42&Number=7342616&page=0&fpart=all



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OfflinePhishgrrl
Walking in thetall trees...
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Registered: 05/03/04
Posts: 5,079
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: Barbi]
    #3058335 - 08/27/04 03:31 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

:lol:! No doubt......


--------------------
Once in awhile you can get shown the light

In the strangest of places if you look at it right...



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Offlinebaraka
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Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 07/16/00
Posts: 10,701
Loc: ohio
Last seen: 1 day, 10 hours
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058337 - 08/27/04 03:31 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Find some cooler people to hang out with.


--------------------
This is the only time I really feel alive.


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OfflineBioSore
Drunken' Irish
Registered: 07/23/04
Posts: 422
Last seen: 9 years, 3 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: BigNerd]
    #3058340 - 08/27/04 03:32 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Eh, but it'd be pretty hard to kick your soul mate outta the house when they're doing something they love. Least that's how I'd figure it'd be.


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,359
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: baraka]
    #3058351 - 08/27/04 03:34 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Thank you...good suggestions everyone.  The stripper idea is good, except all of these guys have clearly stated in the past (when the game got too racy) that they do NOT like that sort of thing.  They're not gay...just terrified of women I think. 

I just hate playing so much.  I think I'm just going to have to say that I don't want to play and get it over with.  Blame it on college or something.  I don't know!  thank you


:heart:


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OfflineBarbi
Plastic Person

Registered: 04/22/02
Posts: 12,976
Last seen: 12 years, 1 month
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058358 - 08/27/04 03:35 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

hahahah

MORE the reason to call teh damn stripper!

its YOUR house. Sometimes, you have to take care of #1 before everyone else.


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OfflineTheSlapnCapn
Slappin' thangs.
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Registered: 08/08/03
Posts: 2,132
Loc: zee mountain state
Last seen: 5 months, 30 days
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: Barbi]
    #3058470 - 08/27/04 04:05 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Doesn't like strippers + plays DnD = life sentence to self-pleasuring and general "fucking loser"-ness

-j


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OfflineBigNerd
Sociable loner
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Registered: 10/31/03
Posts: 4,228
Loc: local elementary school
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: TheSlapnCapn]
    #3058480 - 08/27/04 04:08 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

TheSlapnCapn said:
Doesn't like strippers + plays DnD = life sentence to self-pleasuring and general "fucking loser"-ness




Well then, thank god I like strippers!

BigNerd


--------------------
Sometimes karma needs a little help.


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OfflineTomatadunothing
Stranger

Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 500
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058573 - 08/27/04 04:33 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Damn, these kids are every bit as bad as I figured they would be. Try getting them drunk. That always made hangin' out with my d&d dorks better. It won't take them but 1 keystone light. Then bring in the stripper. Waaay better than D&D, right?


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,359
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: Tomatadunothing]
    #3058595 - 08/27/04 04:40 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Tomatadunothing said:
Damn, these kids are every bit as bad as I figured they would be.  Try getting them drunk.  That always made hangin' out with my d&d dorks better.  It won't take them but 1 keystone light.  Then bring in the stripper.  Waaay better than D&D, right?




They're good people, I just am not comfortable around them that much.  And I don't like playing D&D right now... 

I DO have some cheap vodka in the apartment however... :wink:


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OfflineTomatadunothing
Stranger

Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 500
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3058666 - 08/27/04 04:59 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

just let them smell it. Their fragile gaming bodies have not yet aclimated themselves to alcohol. Then again, that's half the fun of getting them drunk.


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,359
Loc: In the jungle
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: Tomatadunothing]
    #3059129 - 08/27/04 07:17 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Basically, I told them I wasn't playing and am hanging out in my room now.

But guess what.

I can hear them out in the living room discussing MY BOOK, which they haven't even read. I don't know who brought it up, but my story is (for now) something very private and dear to me and so I'm sort of annoyed. I know I should go out there, but I'm stuck in the room.

Anyway.


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OfflineTomatadunothing
Stranger

Registered: 05/16/03
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Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3059191 - 08/27/04 07:42 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Hmm. People talking about something they don't know about. That sure does ring a bell. You go t a published book? I wanna read it as soon as I finish the stuff I gotta read for school this sem! Tell them to read it before they run their yaps, or mind their own damn business.

Don't you guys have a Starfuck's around? Go get a cup of corporate coffee(take a cup from the trash and get a free refill, yay free coffee!) and remove yourself from talk of necromancing and 10 sided dice.


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InvisibleSpiffy
Defender of theGnomes

Registered: 07/04/02
Posts: 1,693
Loc: Next to your mom
Re: Just say no...a stranger in my own damn house [Re: MOTH]
    #3059209 - 08/27/04 07:46 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

I know how you feel about having trouble saying no. I've been there too. But you've got to stand up for yourself and show them who's boss. You are probably stuck having to deal with them since they are your husbands friends but at least you need to go out there and make it evidently clear to them that 1) they will NOT talk shit about your book or anything dear to you in your house 2) should you decide to leave the bedroom they will NOT give you mean looks or the cold shoulder and 3) if they choose not to accept these guidelines, kindly show them the door. All you have to do is go out there and hand it to them 1 time. If they are the type of D&D nerds you make it sound like, they will easily fall into submission.

I like D&D though. I wish I knew some nerds who played *sigh*


--------------------
Namaste: "I honour that place in you where the whole Universe resides. And when I am in that place in me and you are in that place in you,
there is only one of us."


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