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OfflineMad_Buhdda_Abuser
member
Registered: 12/12/03
Posts: 129
Last seen: 19 years, 3 months
The cause of child abuse is.....
    #2957914 - 08/02/04 08:21 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Hey there

i want to talk about a serious topic which is effecting thousands of kids and people everyday...child abuse. Although many people have the stereotype that anyone who abuses a child is a sick perverted freak, technically they are right but there is a motion out there that states if someone is abused as child it makes them want to do the same. Really then its almost like a chain that doesnt stop ever spiralling scaring the social fabric of cultures and morals. Never the less there are people out there who are intern perverted for one reason or another. One reason that comes to mind is the over sexualisation of our youth. Little girls should not be wearing skirts and putting on make-up by the age of 8!!!! It seems to me that this could be a huge factor in the case of Child abuse and even rape.
As a Male with considerable physical strength it would be very hard to rape or take advantage of me, so it doesnt affect me directly but one day might indirectly effect. I would like to make a couple of suggestion to any politically advanced people in this forum. Would it be so hard for a gov. to take away the right of companies to create mini-skirts or tight skimpy shirts directed to children. Does this take away the rights of the company and the person (crazy person) who would let theyre daughter or son...to dress sexually. i guesse it would take out freedom of expression but at the same time it in my eyes would reduce the amount of victims who sucumb to sexual abuse. Isnt the states first job is to keep the safety of the people through our own rights???
Just some thought patterns..enlighten me please!! :tongue2:

PEACE

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Invisibletyke
eschatologist

Registered: 06/23/04
Posts: 153
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2957927 - 08/02/04 08:26 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Have you ever read A Language Older than Words by Derrick Jensen?

If you want some insight into the patterns and causes of child abuse, I highly recommend this book. Beware, though, it's quite the head fuck.


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hey, that douchebag, tyke, just made a post. let's go flame 'im!


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Offlinecastaway
Isanybodyreallyhome?
Male User Gallery
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 553
Last seen: 17 years, 11 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2957956 - 08/02/04 08:33 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

" Isnt the states first job is to keep the safety of the people through our own rights?"-

I guess you are trying to say that elected representatives are responsible.

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OfflineBleaK
paradox
Registered: 06/23/02
Posts: 1,583
Last seen: 10 years, 3 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: castaway]
    #2957967 - 08/02/04 08:38 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

castaway said:
" Isnt the states first job is to keep the safety of the people through our own rights?"-

I guess you are trying to say that elected representatives are responsible.




obviously.
their job is to be responsible.
if we were responsible, there would be no need for elected representatives.


--------------------
"You cannot trust in law, unless you can trust in people. If you can trust in people, you don't need law." -J. Mumma

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Offlinecastaway
Isanybodyreallyhome?
Male User Gallery
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 553
Last seen: 17 years, 11 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: BleaK]
    #2957998 - 08/02/04 08:46 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

so we crucify the representative, eh :smirk:

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OfflineMad_Buhdda_Abuser
member
Registered: 12/12/03
Posts: 129
Last seen: 19 years, 3 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: tyke]
    #2958011 - 08/02/04 08:51 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Never read it, ill look into to...by head fuck do you mean disturbing?


N e ways something just came to me while watching family guy...don ask how i dont even know.
In ancient greece little boys were often molested sexually, Socrates himself had sex with little boys and adolescent boys. At the time of classic greece little boys were known to always be naked during sports, they actually did the olympics naked because clothes were seen as a way of possibally cheating. I was thinking if this might of been a reason as to why it was part of the culture to do this. I doubt this to be in our nature, but by experince, when our mind is presented with senses of beings who are exposed sexually, it leaves room for the mind to create circumstances which without doubt in the greek culture turned into the abuse of theyre young.

Another thought is in my classic civ. course i learned fully about the culture of many ancient civ. (go figure), while learning about the greeks the topic of abuse came up and noone ever mentioned anyone sexually abusing little girls. Although i doubt it never happend, in the case of the greeks it was males youths who were being abused. To sum it up, i beleive these two things tie in to our culture now except its the other way around women are the objects. What im trying to say is, is it more tempting for a person who was sexually abused as a child to sexually abuse a little girl who has make up on and little skimpy clothes?? The answere is yes, but would it stop them from abusing if little people never wore scandalous clothes???? Possibly?

I dont know help me out!

PEACE

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OfflineMad_Buhdda_Abuser
member
Registered: 12/12/03
Posts: 129
Last seen: 19 years, 3 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2958018 - 08/02/04 08:54 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

I Beleive its not really the representatives job to keep the people safe its in the institution that the representitives keep the rights of the people by following the ones in the institution.

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Invisiblegettinjiggywithit
jiggy
Female User Gallery

Registered: 07/20/04
Posts: 7,469
Loc: Heart of Laughter
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2958038 - 08/02/04 09:01 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

whaaaaaaaaaaaa??????????????????????

mini skirts and makeup cause rape?

A dis-ease of mental and emotional imbalance is the cause of rape.

Rape isn't about sex. Its an act of anger derived from a need to feel powerful and in control. And its really fucked up too.

You're talking about pedephilia and sexual perversion. You're talking about mental ilness and emotional repression and arrested development.

make up and mini skirts are physical things, and not causes of either. If a guy gets turned on by mini skirts and makeup, he can find or a pay a consenting adult female who wears them to have sex with.

There is NO excuse for rape. Fucked up explainations yes, but NO excuse or cause out side of the mind of the abuser.

Raping children has nothing to do with mini skirts and make up.

I do know that with the right help, the chain of abuse can be broken.

I have a friend in this line of work if you want the web- address.


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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Invisibletyke
eschatologist

Registered: 06/23/04
Posts: 153
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2958070 - 08/02/04 09:14 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Mad_Buhdda_Abuser said:
Never read it, ill look into to...by head fuck do you mean disturbing?




Yes, head fuck=disturbing.


--------------------
hey, that douchebag, tyke, just made a post. let's go flame 'im!


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OfflineMad_Buhdda_Abuser
member
Registered: 12/12/03
Posts: 129
Last seen: 19 years, 3 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #2958078 - 08/02/04 09:16 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

I shouldnt have said rape, but im talking mainly about child abuse..
My appologies

PEACE

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Offlineld50negative1
lethal dosage

Registered: 07/01/04
Posts: 821
Last seen: 16 years, 7 months
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2958084 - 08/02/04 09:18 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

children deserve to be beat... not raped... stupid children


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InvisibleApril
the tiniestspark

Registered: 05/14/04
Posts: 94
Loc: Maryland
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #2958150 - 08/02/04 09:42 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Agreed.  :thumbup:

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Invisibleshroomydan
exshroomerite
 User Gallery

Registered: 07/04/04
Posts: 4,126
Loc: In the woods
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2958449 - 08/02/04 11:07 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Dress codes in schools work to reduce the over sexualization of children which you are talking about. However these are usually implemented at the local level with the approval of parents at a particular school.

I don't think that little girls should dress like sluts either, but I don't think this could be legislated against in a free country. A law guaranteeing a public school's right to set and enforce dress codes on the other hand might be a good Idea.

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Invisiblegettinjiggywithit
jiggy
Female User Gallery

Registered: 07/20/04
Posts: 7,469
Loc: Heart of Laughter
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser] * 1
    #2958457 - 08/02/04 11:09 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

It is important to distinguish between the two to me. Ignorant parents with little self control or patience hit children. I say ignorant because they are ignorant to other ways of child rearing and just do what was done to them when they "loose it". Anger and power/control issues are still in play though. I couldn't imagine harming a child. Parents who do it in the name of love and say its for a childs own good are "confused". Tough love is really masked anger.

Pedephilia is a REALLY warped avenue.

Looks like Id50negative1 has some anger issues and likes to power trip on children. Maybe he can cough up some more insight here on what is his cause to feel children deserve to beaten, well not just any child, he noted just the stupid ones.

I get the feeling his parents called him stupid a lot and told him he deserved to be beat for being stupid. I think you have a classic example of how the chain links itself right here in your thread.


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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InvisibleApril
the tiniestspark

Registered: 05/14/04
Posts: 94
Loc: Maryland
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #2958616 - 08/02/04 11:57 PM (19 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

gettinjiggywithit said:
Looks like Id50negative1 has some anger issues and likes to power trip on children. Maybe he can cough up some more insight here on what is his cause to feel children deserve to beaten, well not just any child, he noted just the stupid ones.




I believe that was sarcasm.

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Invisiblegettinjiggywithit
jiggy
Female User Gallery

Registered: 07/20/04
Posts: 7,469
Loc: Heart of Laughter
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: April]
    #2958652 - 08/03/04 12:15 AM (19 years, 7 months ago)

50 negative wrote it. I just repeated what he said. Sarcasm would be if I was making humor out of it and I find absolutely NOTHING funny about child abuse as I was physically abused and beaten with a belt when I was a kid- beaten harder if I creid until my skin broke open and bled.

I thought negative would like to share a bit more about why he feels children deserve to be beaten. Maybe I would like to understand that myself as I do not beleive I ever did ANYTHING to deserve it.

I'd like to hear from him about it.

Believe what you want. Its a free will zone.


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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Invisiblekaiowas
lest we baguette
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Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,501
Loc: oz
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: Mad_Buhdda_Abuser]
    #2958755 - 08/03/04 01:00 AM (19 years, 7 months ago)

this is somehting that directly affected me. the only type of abuse is not sexual. my step mom was experienced an extreme state of psychosis that ranged from hearing voices to fits of frenzy where she would beat the hell out of me and then fall asleep, only to wake up and wonder "what happened"

the abuse wasnt just physical, it was also mental. I remember loving school because it allowed me to get away from that hell I called home. sometimes I would have to sit in my room sitting on my hands for hours on end, not doing anything. sometimes I was locked in a closet for hours as she sat outside and periodically came by and told me how worthless I was.

I was hit with ever object in the house that you could think of, from cookie cutter boards, to various brushes, to he-man figures. everything to biting my toes and fingers to being constatnly slapped in the face for reasons such as breathing out of my mouth.

so it's not jsut about the skimpy skirts. this happened to me for the first 10 years of my life (from ages (3-4) to age twelve. luckily she is on medication now and we've had all the talks we could ever have, and I forgive her.

so I don't htink it's jsut about ths skirts. it's about a love for a chiild. skirt or not, if the parent is nuts, they are going to do what they are going to do what the voices tell them to do, get it?


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.

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Invisiblegettinjiggywithit
jiggy
Female User Gallery

Registered: 07/20/04
Posts: 7,469
Loc: Heart of Laughter
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: kaiowas]
    #2958936 - 08/03/04 02:28 AM (19 years, 7 months ago)

((((((((((((((Kaiowas)))))))))))))) thats an internet hug.

You grabbed my heart. My dad use to make us sit in the corner and be quiet too , for hours, so he could watch TV undisturbed. My older brother was tied to a chair once so my mom could finsish cooking dinner. Sometimes the belt beatings happened just because my sister and I were giggling when we were suppose to be falling asleep. My dad called one of my brothers stupid a lot. Now that brother is making more money and living larger then my dad ever did or will.

I reasoned my way through it and have forgiven my parents and we actually have a positive relationship now. I understand that repressed anger chain links itself. It's not an excuse though, just an explanation. I was able to break that chain and havn't even raised my voice with my own, her tears are mine and we are one heart, I couldn't concieve of harming her.

As a matter of fact, all of my siblings with children broke the chain. Why us and others yet repeat the cycle I don't know. Thats why I was wanting to hear from negative50. It's never to late to turn it around. This is not to say that all of us don't still carry open emotional wounds because we do and we still talk about it from time to time amongst ourselves. I don't know what it would take to heal them.

I remember when my oldest brother use to talk about killing my dad in his sleep to make it stop. We HATED him. Kaiowas, you know your step mom was mentally il and out of her mind when she was abusive. At least you have that. My dad was in his mind and still says he beleives in belting kids. He knew he was hurting us. It was his intention to hurt us and he has no remorse about it to this day. I shake my head. This thursday I'm off to stay with them for 10 days to visit. It's a new day and time for me in my life concerning them. I hold no grudges, life moves on and I do what we can to make each day just a little sweeter then the last.

I don't know if there is any making sense of it. I beleive we choose our parents. I keep asking why I chose mine. All I can reason is that I elected to rewrite the programming for future generations as a part of our collective spiritual evolution. Knowing that there is at least my one child in this world who has known nothing but unconditional love and gentility from her parents somehow makes it all worth it. It was a dream of mine to gift a human being with that.

That was cool that you openned up about it kaiowas! Sometimes, people who are yet linked to a chain need to hear this stuff for "something" to click. If anyone reading this hits their kids and thinks the pain goes away in minutes and that its for their own good, please reconsider and know that the pain lasts longer then you think and that what you call good is actually fucking them up in ways you can't see.

maybe this topic should take a turn into bullying and intimidation and emotional repression to gain further understanding on it. I was a class A bully in grade school. In the principles office every day. I was taught that the way to get what you want and to be in power and control was to hit other people and to make them fear you. Show me a bully kid and I will show you a bully parent.

I stopped when I was 12. But to this day, I carry so many of the faces of all the kids I terrorized. How many cried in the morning because they didn't want to go to school because of me????????? It's to late for me to change any of that. Al I can do is forgive myself and my parents until I am blue in the face and broaden awarness where and when I can.

The only reason why anyone who hits their kids, who was hit themselves, that I can see is because they forgot what it was like , because they repressed it. Talking about it is the only way to remember and what keeps you from repeating it. How else can you do it to someone you love unless you forgot what it was like?

If anyone reading this hits your kids, realise they look up to you and love you no matter what. You are the one who is suppose to protect them from harm, not be the cause of it and what they need protection from. How screwed up is that? Just think about it, please.


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

Edited by gettinjiggywithit (08/03/04 02:34 AM)

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Invisiblekaiowas
lest we baguette
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Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,501
Loc: oz
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #2959008 - 08/03/04 03:26 AM (19 years, 7 months ago)

I'm glad that there is someone here who can understand, and I am happy to know I wasn't the only one who thought of killing their abuser just to stop the pain. While in your case your parents weren't as metnally ill, my situation was unique that my father never knew about it. I never told him as to not break up the family. See, my real mom cheated on him and left him, and I remember all too well how heartbroken he was. He loved my step mom a lot, and not only that, but I had a baby sister, and so I realized at the age of 7-8 that I could either tear apart the family for my own well being, or keep the family intact and wait till I got older so then it would stop.

I had to go to so many psychiatrists (because of the marking on my face) not to mention I was prescribed many types of drugs for the disorders I was supposedly supposed to be having. This is why when I hear about modern medicine, I shudder, because I know how fake it can get.

I never really knew how out of her mind she was because I thought of it as mormal, it was all I knew as a child. I thoughts that's how things worked. I'm sure my mom knew she was hurting me as well, heh, no getting around that, she was just pure evil. I've looked into her crazy eyes before, and I saw more than jsut craziness, I saw a satisfaction with every blow. I heard her laughter at my screams of pain. it made her happy.


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.

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Invisiblekaiowas
lest we baguette
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Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,501
Loc: oz
Re: The cause of child abuse is..... [Re: ld50negative1]
    #2959009 - 08/03/04 03:28 AM (19 years, 7 months ago)

"children deserve to be beat... not raped... stupid children "

:thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown: :thumbdown:


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.

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