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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa
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Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,029
You can't read these and stay in a bad mood...
    #2948324 - 07/31/04 01:52 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

warning! warning! this just found in mail box
sent by grand mother

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?


Unique Up On It.



2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?


Tame Way, Unique Up On It.



3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?


They Take The Psycho Path



4. How Do You Get Holy Water?


You Boil The Hell Out Of It.



5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?


Dam!



6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?


Polaroid's



7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?


A Stick



8.. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?


Nacho Cheese.





9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?


Subordinate Clauses.



10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?


Quattro Sinko..



11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?


Spoiled Milk.



12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?


Frostbite.



13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?


A Nervous Wreck.



14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?


Anyone Can Roast Beef.



15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?


Right Where You Left Him.



16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?


Because They Have Big Fingers.



17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?


Because It Scares The Dog.



18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?


Sanka.



19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?


The Location Of The Dirt Bag.


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Offlinefreddurgan
Techgnostic
Male

Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 4 years, 6 months
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #2948353 - 07/31/04 01:59 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

SHEIKofSHIITAKE said:
warning! warning! this just found in mail box
sent by grand mother

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?


Right Where You Left Him.





haha. i love that one


--------------------
Ishmael
http://www.ishmael.org

Ron Paul 2008!
http://www.ronpaul2008.com/


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InvisibleShroomismM
Space Travellin
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Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 64,424
Loc: 9th Dimension Flag
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #2948360 - 07/31/04 02:00 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

I read it but I'm still in a bad mood


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Offlinerogue_pixie
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Registered: 07/28/04
Posts: 3,765
Loc: narnia
Last seen: 3 hours, 48 minutes
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #2948369 - 07/31/04 02:04 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Q. What do you call a man with a spade on his head?

A. Doug!

HAHAHA.

Ahem.


--------------------
'It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.' ~ J. Krishnamurti


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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa
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Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,029
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Shroomism]
    #2948371 - 07/31/04 02:05 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Another satisfied costomer. :rolleyes: :sun:


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InvisibleLocus
Male

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Registered: 03/11/04
Posts: 6,049
Loc: ny/europe/other
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: freddurgan]
    #2948373 - 07/31/04 02:06 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

yeah, i just heard one similar to that somewhere. It was "What do you call a dog with no legs?" - You don't because he won't come. Or something like that. :smile:


--------------------

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity. ~ Albert Einstein
"Fear is the great barrier to human growth." ~ Dr. Robert Monroe



~~~*Dosis sola facit venenum*~~~

*Check my profile to listen to my music* :smile:


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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa
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Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,029
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #2948380 - 07/31/04 02:08 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

I am going to tell my freind that one.  His name is Doug :smile:


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Offlinerogue_pixie
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Registered: 07/28/04
Posts: 3,765
Loc: narnia
Last seen: 3 hours, 48 minutes
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #2948385 - 07/31/04 02:09 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

The first time I heard that joke I was in hysterics.

I'm so lame. :smile:


--------------------
'It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.' ~ J. Krishnamurti


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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa
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Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,029
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #2948397 - 07/31/04 02:13 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

You can probably tell that I am to. :grin:


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OfflineJackal
Well Versed In Etiquette
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Registered: 10/16/02
Posts: 4,571
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #2948998 - 07/31/04 04:36 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

What do you call a man without a spade in his head?

Douglas!  :smirk:


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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa
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Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,029
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Jackal]
    #2949007 - 07/31/04 04:38 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

lol oh my god thats what im talkin bout pure on adulterated silly jokes.


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Offlinerogue_pixie
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Registered: 07/28/04
Posts: 3,765
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Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Jackal]
    #2949180 - 07/31/04 05:12 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Yeah that made me laugh too.

I'm easily amused. :laugh:  :blush:


--------------------
'It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.' ~ J. Krishnamurti


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Offlinebrowndustin
dustybuddy

Registered: 10/03/03
Posts: 2,957
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #2949289 - 07/31/04 05:36 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Hahaha those are great. Nice and mild too, it's a good change in pace from 'adult' jokes. :smile:


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Invisiblekaiowas
mndfrayze'speppet urme
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Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,498
Loc: oz
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #2949321 - 07/31/04 05:45 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

lol  thanks man!!!! :grin:


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.---senior doobie


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InvisiblePsyllyMe
LOST.......
Registered: 07/25/04
Posts: 848
Loc: Center of the Known Unive...
Re: You can't read these and stay in a bad mood... [Re: browndustin]
    #2949334 - 07/31/04 05:48 PM (12 years, 4 months ago)

Q:What do you call a cop with no legs?




A: never call the cops.........I've never seen a situation than can't be made worse by the involvement of the cops.

peace


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