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OfflineAjoc
stranger ...than youthink
Registered: 09/12/03
Posts: 81
Loc: Southampton, UK
Last seen: 5 years, 5 months
ze ways of ze Paris police
    #2926023 - 07/25/04 01:25 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

hope this is the right place for this!
----------------------------------------


Just had a great holiday in Paris with a few friends but I thought I'd comment on a scarily close occasion with the local police.

It's a little complicated to put into file words but I thought the whole thing was interesting and should share.

Ok, 4 of us. Me, and A, J and M.

I have an eighth or so of bud, ground up in a baggy far too big for it, sandwich bag size or whatever (all we could find :laugh:).

A has an eighth just like mine, and and the backpack which we were sharing (so we didn't look like stupid tourists carrying a backpack each and just share one), and this back has 2 pre rolled joints in there. These joints are J and M's, as they pre rolled and me and A we going to roll some out there.

So it was when we were going to go get a tube (near "Nation" if anyone here has a clue where I'm on about), a policeman approaches us, all friendly, and asks if anyone speaks French. This gets me suspicious, we must have been followed or at least watched as otherwise he wouldn't have bothered asking.

So we all say no one speaks French, even though I am bilingual and can. He then turns round and asks if any of us have drugs on us. We each in turn say "no drugs".

Then, 3 other police men came down the stairs to the tube platform and blocked them off (the only exit) and declared they were going to search us. I feel sorry for French people if they can be searched so easily without apparent reason (we hadn't acted suspiciously or smoked anything yet, just wondered about...only suspicious thing was we left that tube station and went back 15 min later, maybe looked as if we had picked up?)

Anyway, first to get patted down is J, who of course has nothing on him. I see A has started to flip out, tho I am pretty calm tho I have bud on me.

They do however find on J his bud grinder, which is crusty from the amount it gets used. They don't seem to count this as a drug find, although I have a friend who got minorly screwed for the shit in his grinder back here in England. The police guy who got it out seemed literally repulsed by the smell it gave off.

M gets patted down next and he seems to do some stalling tactic in the hope of me and A not getting searched, but sure enough they come to me next.

Pat me down, then told to empty my pockets. Now I should point out here I am wearing shorts with trousers on top, which I put on last minute before going out. My bud is in my right SHORTS pocket.

So first of all I empty my jeans pockets and hope they don't pat me down again and feel the pockets below. They go through my wallet. He tells me to keep it out and pats me down again. The police man looks really angry and flustered and says "ALL OF THEM" so I reach into my trousers and start fumbling around in my trousers.

Here is where I saved my ass by luck and a cunning  :wink:. I pulled the bag of bud out of my shorts pocket and into the section between my trousers and my shorts. As the bag was so big, it unscrunched itself and just shaped itself easily round my leg. The bud being ground up just meant it fell loosely around the bag and there were no big lumps to feel (lucky this bud wasn't sticky!).

The cop felt over the place where it was after twice and didn't feel anything, and then got more interested in a lump in my back pocket which he must have thought was hash or something but it was just the seam of my poorly made jeans :smile:. Once he was convinced it wasn't anything, they moved on to A who had gone pretty pale.

They felt him down a few times but somehow just never felt over his bud, eventhough it was a big ol bag mushed hard into a lower leg pocket on his jeans.

But then they went through the bag, and found, the two spliffs in a spliff "container" (the ones they sell the maxima giant party joints in in Holland), and all the smoking equipment you'll ever need.

So out comes this tube with two spliffs in. He asks "What is this?" to all of us. We all say "Don't know!". Then "Who's is this?", everyone says "Don't know!". And to finally piss the pig off and make his job easy "Who's is this bag?", and sure enough we all answer "Don't know!".

Eventually the guy gets frustrated and cuff's A. Then the ohhh shit feeling kicks in. Fortunately it seemed the cuffs were all just a ploy to get the scared guy to fess up, because after a while they uncuffed him, took the joints out, ripped them up and into the bin, broke the joint holder in half and then put the grinder on the floor and literally smashed it into 100 pieces with one of their police beating sticks.

The convenient thing about being secretly french speaking in this situation is that the cops all spoke out loud and were blatent about what they were trying to do and I just relayed it all to my friends without them realising. At one point one said "Shhh we need to get them to admit they know what it is". I don't know if this is normal or something in french law or just those police being funny, but I instantly just told my friends not to ever admit knowing what it is and beat them at their game.

Other good quotes
"They must have something look at the grinder"
"Look at him he's really scared and flippin out." (About A)
"If he was french I would have smacked him for saying that." (When the pig goes to A "what is this?" and he replies "a picture" regarding the mysterious leaf on the joint holder)
"We can't take him [A] alone we need to try and get one of the others to take the blame as well"

Anyway we were let off minus two joints, a container, and a grinder. I just think it's a miracle no one got arrested fully...

They were close to taking A judging from their conversation, but the police guy who seemed to be in charge took pity and didn't want to take a 16 year old non french speaker on his own down the station, even though the others were well up for it and discussing what station to bring him to.

But had they found either bag of bud, or if we spoke french, or if I hadn't put my jeans on top or possibly if we had just responded to the situation differently, then it could not have gone so easily.

Anyway, the morale of the story is put shit in your socks. They didn't search our feet one bit, except A who got his shoes taken off and smacked on the platform for good measure cos they were convinced he had more (which he did :laugh:)

Hope that was at least an almost interesting insight into a parisien police search. Take care...

Edited by Ajoc (07/25/04 01:51 PM)

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OfflineChiefThunderbong
Inhale to theChief
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Registered: 10/18/02
Posts: 3,647
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
Re: ze ways of ze Paris police [Re: Ajoc]
    #2926056 - 07/25/04 01:37 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

Man that is quite a story. It sounds like you handled the situation quite well, good thing too or it most likely would have had a much different ending.


--------------------
Yeah spinnin' around again
yea caught in a tailspin

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OfflineGus
Back in town.

Registered: 07/16/03
Posts: 1,503
Loc: Quebec, Canada
Last seen: 15 years, 5 months
Re: ze ways of ze Paris police [Re: Ajoc]
    #2928797 - 07/26/04 01:46 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

Damn are they getting paid on the number of arrests they do or what?Motherfuckers.

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OfflineAjoc
stranger ...than youthink
Registered: 09/12/03
Posts: 81
Loc: Southampton, UK
Last seen: 5 years, 5 months
Re: ze ways of ze Paris police [Re: Gus]
    #2937565 - 07/28/04 06:38 PM (19 years, 9 months ago)

Does anyone know french law btw?

Is it legal to randomly search like that?

Because I see what Gus means, whats the point? They weren't getting anything out of it that I know of, unless they are actually paid per arrest.

To be honest I think they were genuinely thinking they were about to make a big bust or something, which caused them to pull us to one side. They were a little disappointed.

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InvisibleStarter
Stranger
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Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 1,148
Loc: Australia
Re: ze ways of ze Paris police [Re: Ajoc]
    #2939742 - 07/29/04 09:00 AM (19 years, 9 months ago)

Great story, love the "secretly french speaking" caper...fucking pigs, good to hear you foiled 'em...

Quote:

"If he was french I would have smacked him for saying that." (When the pig goes to A "what is this?" and he replies "a picture" regarding the mysterious leaf on the joint holder)




That's some funny shit. I had a good laugh on that!

Man, their metro stinks bad of piss, how come the cops don't go mop it up seeing they've got nothing else to do but shake down stoners.


--------------------
Convert Metric and Imperial.

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